for On The Other Side10/22/2024 c25 Onibha
The text is very confusing and incomplete.
The text is very confusing and incomplete.
9/21/2024 c25 Hide0us
What a wonderful story. Truly a shame it has been discontinued but thank you so much for the reading experience!
What a wonderful story. Truly a shame it has been discontinued but thank you so much for the reading experience!
2/4/2021 c12 
8massiecure
i love this chapter so much, i feel like it utilize very well the personality built up you made for daphne, Astoria and their dynamics with draco
8massiecurei love this chapter so much, i feel like it utilize very well the personality built up you made for daphne, Astoria and their dynamics with draco
2/2/2021 c9 massiecure
this exchanges with summerby is beautiful, really. it's a genuine, compelling scene. i love it
this exchanges with summerby is beautiful, really. it's a genuine, compelling scene. i love it
2/1/2021 c4 massiecure
idk why that quiet moment of "but it did" made me feel so much. it summarize the mood for your plot very well too. thank you so much for sharing this fic with us
idk why that quiet moment of "but it did" made me feel so much. it summarize the mood for your plot very well too. thank you so much for sharing this fic with us
10/30/2020 c12 Mathilda Serdaigle
It's the truth. How you wrote it is really beautiful. I love this story that I am rereading for the second time
It's the truth. How you wrote it is really beautiful. I love this story that I am rereading for the second time
6/20/2020 c25 1arosequartz
I know this is abandoned, but I’d just like to leave a comment, saying, your vocabulary is exceptional. Excellent writing, I loved your version of Astoria. Enjoy your summer!
1arosequartzI know this is abandoned, but I’d just like to leave a comment, saying, your vocabulary is exceptional. Excellent writing, I loved your version of Astoria. Enjoy your summer!
11/1/2017 c24 EvieGao
It is the best Astoria fic I've ever read!It has been two years since your last update. I have read your current chapter for like,twenty times!Nov 11is my birthday,and it's also the date I found your adorable Astoria a year ago XD!I really really wish there would be a sweet miracle this year ...your sweet sweet update!
It is the best Astoria fic I've ever read!It has been two years since your last update. I have read your current chapter for like,twenty times!Nov 11is my birthday,and it's also the date I found your adorable Astoria a year ago XD!I really really wish there would be a sweet miracle this year ...your sweet sweet update!
9/30/2017 c23 9RainbowKitteh13
This is one of those stories I come back to when I revisit the fandom. Please please update.
9RainbowKitteh13This is one of those stories I come back to when I revisit the fandom. Please please update.
9/3/2017 c25 evangeline15
I cant believe you left this story. All this amazing work you've done and you give it up? Let me tell you that I think your story is fantastic. You made me believe everything like as this could be a real cannon. This story is a perfect Draco/Astoria. Please, in the name of Harry Potter and all the people who we admire your work, you HAVE to finish it. Otherwise, I'll send Bellatrix to curse you with Cruciatus until the end of time.
I cant believe you left this story. All this amazing work you've done and you give it up? Let me tell you that I think your story is fantastic. You made me believe everything like as this could be a real cannon. This story is a perfect Draco/Astoria. Please, in the name of Harry Potter and all the people who we admire your work, you HAVE to finish it. Otherwise, I'll send Bellatrix to curse you with Cruciatus until the end of time.
7/19/2017 c25 4strawberrytear
This is really good i enjoyed it. I think it was very in keeping with canon while managing to be it's own story too and that's hard to do.
4strawberrytearThis is really good i enjoyed it. I think it was very in keeping with canon while managing to be it's own story too and that's hard to do.
4/30/2017 c19 Recovering
I first read this scene, where Draco tries to cut out his Mark, years ago, and stopped reading this fic then and there. I felt sick to my stomach. I hated it, in a way I couldn't articulate.
Other readers told me I must be jealous. For a while, I believed them. I had no other reason. But now, I see why I had such a strong reaction to this scene.
I am a recovering self-harmer. I began using physical pain to distract from emotional pain when I was fifteen. I'm in my twenties now, and I still haven't broken the habit. The addiction. Because that's what it is-an addictive means of trying to substitute your emotional pain with physical pain. The worst part is that it works. That's what makes it addictive. It's a serious problem, and complicated one, and any story involving it should treat it with the nuance and sensitivity it deserves.
This scene does the exact opposite.
Maybe you didn't mean to make this scene "about" self-harm. Maybe you just meant to show how numb Draco had become. But to me, the coding is there, and it's screaming for my attention. He's using physical violence to rid himself of memories he doesn't want. As a recovering self-harmer, it's difficult for me NOT to see this as self-harm.
Now, you may ask why I find this problematic. It's because there's no grounding here. The scene happens and then it's over. Draco has no basis for self-harm; throughout the story, there has been no obvious depression, no clouding of his thoughts, no intrusive thoughts or flashbacks that so often lead people toward self-harm. He's perfectly lucid, and when the scene is over, that's it. It isn't here to show people why self-harm is used as a coping mechanism. It isn't here as the culmination of two years of depression and despair. It is only here to earn Draco pity points with the audience.
That? That is *sickening.* That is taking a very real, very serious problem that many people have and cheapening it so you can earn praise for your "darkness" and "gritty realism."
I've wondered, since I read this, why that scene stuck with me for so long. And now I know why. It's because you cheapened part of my identity and used it to earn praise from people who understand it even less than you do.
And I'm still disgusted.
I first read this scene, where Draco tries to cut out his Mark, years ago, and stopped reading this fic then and there. I felt sick to my stomach. I hated it, in a way I couldn't articulate.
Other readers told me I must be jealous. For a while, I believed them. I had no other reason. But now, I see why I had such a strong reaction to this scene.
I am a recovering self-harmer. I began using physical pain to distract from emotional pain when I was fifteen. I'm in my twenties now, and I still haven't broken the habit. The addiction. Because that's what it is-an addictive means of trying to substitute your emotional pain with physical pain. The worst part is that it works. That's what makes it addictive. It's a serious problem, and complicated one, and any story involving it should treat it with the nuance and sensitivity it deserves.
This scene does the exact opposite.
Maybe you didn't mean to make this scene "about" self-harm. Maybe you just meant to show how numb Draco had become. But to me, the coding is there, and it's screaming for my attention. He's using physical violence to rid himself of memories he doesn't want. As a recovering self-harmer, it's difficult for me NOT to see this as self-harm.
Now, you may ask why I find this problematic. It's because there's no grounding here. The scene happens and then it's over. Draco has no basis for self-harm; throughout the story, there has been no obvious depression, no clouding of his thoughts, no intrusive thoughts or flashbacks that so often lead people toward self-harm. He's perfectly lucid, and when the scene is over, that's it. It isn't here to show people why self-harm is used as a coping mechanism. It isn't here as the culmination of two years of depression and despair. It is only here to earn Draco pity points with the audience.
That? That is *sickening.* That is taking a very real, very serious problem that many people have and cheapening it so you can earn praise for your "darkness" and "gritty realism."
I've wondered, since I read this, why that scene stuck with me for so long. And now I know why. It's because you cheapened part of my identity and used it to earn praise from people who understand it even less than you do.
And I'm still disgusted.
9/16/2016 c25 Bleh
Reading this story is like gazing into the Uncanny Valley: It's supposed to be realistic and heart-wrenching and emotionally honest. The characters are supposed to be deeply flawed and not quite likable, the sort of people you'd meet on the street and probably dislike. The prose is supposed to be rich and detailed.
But overall, the tale falls short. It nearly reaches its goal, at points, but it is those points that make it so painful to read. It's like watching The Polar Express, seeing images that are supposed to look beautifully realistic, yet wind up looking like disturbingly realistic plastic sculptures of human beings. At no point are the characters allowed to act realistically; they are always pushed back into the "nasty Slytherin" box and forced to recite bad dialogue. The pain in Draco's life is never allowed to stand on its own; artificial angst is always piled on. At no point is Astoria allowed to develop into a character of her own; she fluctuates perpetually between Sue and Jerk Sue. The world always conspires to deliver as much pain as possible to the Slytherin characters, as is made clear in the last few chapters.
And yet you, as an author, do show promise. So here's my advice, for what it's worth: Ignore the reviewers telling you this story is perfect in every way. You don't have to take every negative review to heart, and you don't have to take the advice in every one. But mull it over. And then, try writing a story while putting that criticism in action-for instance, write a postwar story where the government just wants to move on, rather than punish everyone who was even remotely connected to the failed regime. Or one where a small sliver of pain is shown, rather than the full brunt of it. Try putting some of the criticism to work for you, and see how the result goes.
Reading this story is like gazing into the Uncanny Valley: It's supposed to be realistic and heart-wrenching and emotionally honest. The characters are supposed to be deeply flawed and not quite likable, the sort of people you'd meet on the street and probably dislike. The prose is supposed to be rich and detailed.
But overall, the tale falls short. It nearly reaches its goal, at points, but it is those points that make it so painful to read. It's like watching The Polar Express, seeing images that are supposed to look beautifully realistic, yet wind up looking like disturbingly realistic plastic sculptures of human beings. At no point are the characters allowed to act realistically; they are always pushed back into the "nasty Slytherin" box and forced to recite bad dialogue. The pain in Draco's life is never allowed to stand on its own; artificial angst is always piled on. At no point is Astoria allowed to develop into a character of her own; she fluctuates perpetually between Sue and Jerk Sue. The world always conspires to deliver as much pain as possible to the Slytherin characters, as is made clear in the last few chapters.
And yet you, as an author, do show promise. So here's my advice, for what it's worth: Ignore the reviewers telling you this story is perfect in every way. You don't have to take every negative review to heart, and you don't have to take the advice in every one. But mull it over. And then, try writing a story while putting that criticism in action-for instance, write a postwar story where the government just wants to move on, rather than punish everyone who was even remotely connected to the failed regime. Or one where a small sliver of pain is shown, rather than the full brunt of it. Try putting some of the criticism to work for you, and see how the result goes.