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for Not What it Seems

12/28/2010 c1 You Know Who
Tisk, Tisk. You've broken the rules.

This is not Percy Jackson, not at all. Which means you broke the guidlines by posting your story here. I don't care what your reasons are, but move it As soon as possible.

I allready see some flaws. You MC is physicaly too pretty-a sign of her being a Mary Sue. You can tone it down with plenty of personality flaws. Like instead of making her the good girl, she can be the posh, cold, bully. That would be a more interesting point of view.

Also, do your research on Angels beforehand. The Book of Enoch, Paradise Lost, and Dante's Inferno could help a lot. Becase the proper term for the offsprings of fallen angels and mortals are called Nephilim.

A little hint: get rid of the cage idea, that's in the tv show Supernatural. it's too common these days. Also try to incorperate other religons. They also had Angels cone in go in their stories.

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