for Sarah's Anguish3/25/2011 c1 For
Huh. Well, that was certainly some good-quality writing... but the story is a bit lacking. It was just kind of, oh, Jereth is murdered by someone we've never heard of, then Sarah lives on ten more years and dies. The end.
Develop the plot a little more, perhaps?
Huh. Well, that was certainly some good-quality writing... but the story is a bit lacking. It was just kind of, oh, Jereth is murdered by someone we've never heard of, then Sarah lives on ten more years and dies. The end.
Develop the plot a little more, perhaps?
3/18/2011 c1 
2Jareth-GK
My, my, this is a distressing scenario. Not only that I should be killed, by an ex-lover no less, but that I should never hear Sarah's timely declaration. I do hope it will not take my own death for her to finally realise her obvious ardour for me... I am willing to do a great deal for my future Queen but this seems rather counter-productive.
Hm, perhaps if she were to only think that I was dead...? But I suspect Sarah would not appreciate the flagrant deception attached to that venture. Do you happen to know Sarah?
2Jareth-GKMy, my, this is a distressing scenario. Not only that I should be killed, by an ex-lover no less, but that I should never hear Sarah's timely declaration. I do hope it will not take my own death for her to finally realise her obvious ardour for me... I am willing to do a great deal for my future Queen but this seems rather counter-productive.
Hm, perhaps if she were to only think that I was dead...? But I suspect Sarah would not appreciate the flagrant deception attached to that venture. Do you happen to know Sarah?