for Innocent Games?7/10/2011 c1 
3The Dragon Fairiechaser
THIS IS A ONE-SHOT!
if it was chapters then they'ed have differend pages not just one :(
3The Dragon FairiechaserTHIS IS A ONE-SHOT!
if it was chapters then they'ed have differend pages not just one :(
7/8/2011 c1 5Dying Rebel
It seems like it could have potential as a story. However, it has no foundation on the relationships and it gets to the point rather early. If I could provide any advice, it would be to rewrite it, the first chapter is fine, but instead of Ikuto confessing to her so quickly and actually being a pervert, have them go on little excursions and have him drop bigger and bigger hints. Have Amu struggle with a conflict between moving forward into a romantic relationship, or staying friends. Then, a big sexy bang! Not that kind of bang though...necessarily. Feel free to use or ignore my suggestions, seeing as I have never written a fanfic and this may be quite popular with good reviews.
5Dying RebelIt seems like it could have potential as a story. However, it has no foundation on the relationships and it gets to the point rather early. If I could provide any advice, it would be to rewrite it, the first chapter is fine, but instead of Ikuto confessing to her so quickly and actually being a pervert, have them go on little excursions and have him drop bigger and bigger hints. Have Amu struggle with a conflict between moving forward into a romantic relationship, or staying friends. Then, a big sexy bang! Not that kind of bang though...necessarily. Feel free to use or ignore my suggestions, seeing as I have never written a fanfic and this may be quite popular with good reviews.
5/30/2011 c1 CrazyAnimeluver333
HAHA, i'm commenting on Aww snaap's comment.
DUDE, YOU'RE FUCKING FUNNY! XD
haha, i wanna read your stories now XD
Oh, and yes, keep up the good work Yuki-senpai! :)
You're doing really great!
HAHA, i'm commenting on Aww snaap's comment.
DUDE, YOU'RE FUCKING FUNNY! XD
haha, i wanna read your stories now XD
Oh, and yes, keep up the good work Yuki-senpai! :)
You're doing really great!
5/8/2011 c1 4lollie-chan22
The story went really fast, like the readers didn't know if they new each other in the beginning. Also, they started dating, kissing, making out and having sex all on the same day. Don't get me wrong, I really like the story, but it seemed kind of unrealistic.
But it was a great one-shot! Although taking things slow in a story like this can make it a lot more interesting and fun to read, going fast is good too for those of us that just want to get to the damn lemon...
Good job :3
4lollie-chan22The story went really fast, like the readers didn't know if they new each other in the beginning. Also, they started dating, kissing, making out and having sex all on the same day. Don't get me wrong, I really like the story, but it seemed kind of unrealistic.
But it was a great one-shot! Although taking things slow in a story like this can make it a lot more interesting and fun to read, going fast is good too for those of us that just want to get to the damn lemon...
Good job :3
5/6/2011 c1 aBIGhater
WTF!
WTF!
5/3/2011 c1 ShadowedDancers
Ikuto dosent blush so this a more cuter side of him! overall i like it i was laughin about the tadase part i really dont like him. he can get annoying sometime. really good!
Ikuto dosent blush so this a more cuter side of him! overall i like it i was laughin about the tadase part i really dont like him. he can get annoying sometime. really good!