9/21/2017 c1 AwesomeGal101XD
STEP FATHER?!

3/31/2012 c1 12whatdotheydream
Actually... this is really awesome! cheers to many more!

6/5/2011 c1 1Caitie Manda
Very sweet! I liked it a lot. My word of advice is this: Don't rush it. You made him seem all mad at the beginning when he was getting more and more frustrated about telling Lina that he liked her, and then instantly he snapped out of it and told her. They kiss once and then that night...? It seems like it all happened too, too fast. Also, one part of the story says, ' "Hey, Lina," His gentle voice broke my daydream, "don't you think it's time to head back." ' I'm pretty sure that you should've worded it like a question. Instead of stating that they needed to head back like you did, it seems to me like you were actually trying to imply that he asked her. Please remember that if it's a question, it needs a question mark and not a period. Sorry if my review got a little boring by the end, but I was trying to give you some constructive criticism. Good job overall! Keep working at it and I'd love to read more from you!