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12/21/2014 c2 27PokemonOtaku0909
Lucy is an idiot. I'm sure there are a lot of women out there that would love to be 6 foot 4 inches tall. Even though i'm a dude, i wish i was that tall. Hard to forget Barbara the blond. She told Ash in the episode "Queen of the Serveptine" that she would find him if he lost to anyone in a pokemon battle. I'm not really surprised that Ash would eat something so dangerous like the trinidad drapion. He does have a bad habit of being impulsive and gambling with his life. Lucy should be thankful for being tall.
12/21/2014 c1 PokemonOtaku0909
Mario is a he. DAM! Those must've been some 123 degree peppers if he drank a whole lake. Lucy sure does grow some dangerous peppers.
12/10/2013 c1 BoBLaughsAtNakedGurls
...wtf did i read
8/6/2012 c1 9King of the Chode
Lol I like how Brock just knows who Mario is and doesn't even question the fact that he just appeared out of nowhere.
4/5/2012 c2 5Geekachu
Hmm, let's see if I can make this review suck as little as possible:

First, I'll start on your characterization. Brock seems to be in character most of the time, but he seems just a tad too... intelligent sometimes. Then again, I haven't watched an episode of Pokemon in forever, so maybe I just remember him as a moron. Same goes for Ash, but that might have been your intention to start with. Sorry if I'm being vague about all this, feel free to PM me if I'm not making any sense.

Unfortunately , I don't know who Lucy is, so I can't give you any critique on her. My bad.

One thing that I think would add to your story would be adding more description. Don't take away any dialogue, just add some stuff about where they are, why they're there, how they're feeling right now, etc. Also, some explanation as to why Ash and Anabel are there would be good. Looking at my story though, I guess I'm not really one to talk, lol.

One last thing. When you're using numbers, you're generally supposed to spell them out. Same goes for percent.

I really hope this review doesn't sound mean. I enjoyed reading your story, and there was some over the top humor (like Brock using Flamethrower) that made me laugh. But if anything I said sounded rude or flame-like, let me know, and you will have my sincere apologies.

I'll be keeping an eye out for more of your work. This is Geekachu, signing out.
8/20/2011 c1 24WonderHeroe
I bawled out laughing reading this xD, freaking hilarious dude. I nearly died when Brock "took" Lucy's advise. :P
8/8/2011 c2 2Emperor Serperior
Lucy was a little OOC in the beginning, but other than that, this chapter was decent. It was short, but decent. :)

Please update when you can
8/8/2011 c2 BreeZaps
I know make cilan eat a pepper
8/7/2011 c1 Emperor Serperior
Eh...This story had a few flaws-But other than that, it's not that bad.

I think that if you continue to work had at improving your skills and mind, you can become an excellent author.

If some idiot gives you a nasty review, don't let it prevent you from achieving an excellent future in the world of story-telling.

I think that you can become a great author.

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