for The Real Alan Tracy9/11/2023 c6 Guest
I really like this story. In fact, this is not the first time I’ve read this. You have talent for telling a story and keeping the audience engaged.
The spelling, grammar, and punctuation could use work. They are better than some stories, but just bad enough to be distracting. I will just be getting really into the plot, when all of a sudden a glaring error will pop up and pull me back to reality. This was especially true of the sentence fragments a few chapters back, where a partial sentence was treated as a full sentence in terms of punctuation. I had to reread it several times to understand what you were saying. This can be helped with a beta reader.
It was especially obvious when you threw in the gang member’s note. He was supposedly a bad speller, but he spelled things wrong according to something he would have learned in school, instead of spelling phonetically (as a truly uneducated person would). You making fun of someone else’s poor spelling and then going on to make a number of spelling mistakes made the whole thing cringey.
I really like this story. In fact, this is not the first time I’ve read this. You have talent for telling a story and keeping the audience engaged.
The spelling, grammar, and punctuation could use work. They are better than some stories, but just bad enough to be distracting. I will just be getting really into the plot, when all of a sudden a glaring error will pop up and pull me back to reality. This was especially true of the sentence fragments a few chapters back, where a partial sentence was treated as a full sentence in terms of punctuation. I had to reread it several times to understand what you were saying. This can be helped with a beta reader.
It was especially obvious when you threw in the gang member’s note. He was supposedly a bad speller, but he spelled things wrong according to something he would have learned in school, instead of spelling phonetically (as a truly uneducated person would). You making fun of someone else’s poor spelling and then going on to make a number of spelling mistakes made the whole thing cringey.
5/27/2017 c12 walmar
Thank you, this was a great story, I smiled, laughed and even shed a tear. You really understand the Thunderbirds. Hope to read more as I work my way through the fan site. Also please keep writing you really have a goood way with words
Thank you, this was a great story, I smiled, laughed and even shed a tear. You really understand the Thunderbirds. Hope to read more as I work my way through the fan site. Also please keep writing you really have a goood way with words
3/22/2016 c2 Guest
Its probably a food thing you didn't move if the cast was that heavy. When I was five I broke my leg. I insisted on going about as normal - no crutches or wheelchair. The cast wore a hole the size of a tennis ball in my heal. Keep in mind that as a five year old a tennisball was HUGE.
Its probably a food thing you didn't move if the cast was that heavy. When I was five I broke my leg. I insisted on going about as normal - no crutches or wheelchair. The cast wore a hole the size of a tennis ball in my heal. Keep in mind that as a five year old a tennisball was HUGE.
5/17/2015 c6 Guest
THANK YOU FOR EXPLAINING THE VOCAB I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE NO IDEA WHATS GOING ON
THANK YOU FOR EXPLAINING THE VOCAB I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE NO IDEA WHATS GOING ON
1/17/2014 c12 
8PippaFrost
THIS IS PERFECTION.
YOU'RE A GENIUS AND AN AMAZING WRITTER!
ALL I CAN SAY WITHOUT STARTING YELLING!
8PippaFrostTHIS IS PERFECTION.
YOU'RE A GENIUS AND AN AMAZING WRITTER!
ALL I CAN SAY WITHOUT STARTING YELLING!
7/8/2012 c1 Alanwzee
Well done! Thank you for sharing your great story which left me reading from beginning to end. You have provided all of us many life examples to learn from and apply within our own families.
Well done! Thank you for sharing your great story which left me reading from beginning to end. You have provided all of us many life examples to learn from and apply within our own families.
6/6/2012 c10 2AllyIsAPenguin
aww when jeff goes come on son we'll go up together it remindes me of derek redmond when is dad helped him to the finish line :D
2AllyIsAPenguinaww when jeff goes come on son we'll go up together it remindes me of derek redmond when is dad helped him to the finish line :D
1/19/2012 c9 Trillianaus
Hi. Just finished reading chapter 9. This is a ripping good yarn. Having said that, it may be a regional/different English speaking country thing, but I really want to run a spell and grammar check over it. Some grammar and spelling constructs pull me out of the story. I blame my old English master from high school. Otherwise, as I said, a ripping good yarn.
Hi. Just finished reading chapter 9. This is a ripping good yarn. Having said that, it may be a regional/different English speaking country thing, but I really want to run a spell and grammar check over it. Some grammar and spelling constructs pull me out of the story. I blame my old English master from high school. Otherwise, as I said, a ripping good yarn.
12/12/2011 c12 60Writer With Sprite
A really good story, I'm glad you have posted. There are a few minor grammar errors (I know mine have 'em too) and a few things that are like breath/breathe, but I loved the work, it was quite enjoyable. I think you took a stereotypical story and made it your own, unique, and different. Overall, it was very well done and I quite enjoyed it. I hope you post your other work.
60Writer With SpriteA really good story, I'm glad you have posted. There are a few minor grammar errors (I know mine have 'em too) and a few things that are like breath/breathe, but I loved the work, it was quite enjoyable. I think you took a stereotypical story and made it your own, unique, and different. Overall, it was very well done and I quite enjoyed it. I hope you post your other work.
11/30/2011 c12 Laesk
a truly good chapter and a good story.
are you going to add more to this story?
will you write another and turn it into a series?
what secrets do Alan's programs have? what else does little Alan Tracy do without his family knowing?
i hope you do write more. i have been enjoying reading this story. thank you for writing it and sharing it with us all.
a truly good chapter and a good story.
are you going to add more to this story?
will you write another and turn it into a series?
what secrets do Alan's programs have? what else does little Alan Tracy do without his family knowing?
i hope you do write more. i have been enjoying reading this story. thank you for writing it and sharing it with us all.