for Help of a Seer9/2/2015 c5 Simianpower
Uhh... if they weren't yet Death Eaters, then what's with the soul magic in the left arms? This chapter is really self-contradictory. Did you edit it partway through and forget to change some parts? Even if this is explained in future chapters, it's a plot hole that SHOULD be addressed immediately, and in the place in the story where it occurs.
Uhh... if they weren't yet Death Eaters, then what's with the soul magic in the left arms? This chapter is really self-contradictory. Did you edit it partway through and forget to change some parts? Even if this is explained in future chapters, it's a plot hole that SHOULD be addressed immediately, and in the place in the story where it occurs.
9/2/2015 c4 Simianpower
Thanks for not covering every single detail in the Gringott's meeting. I've read that far, FAR too many times in other stories. Better to show than tell, that's for sure.
Thanks for not covering every single detail in the Gringott's meeting. I've read that far, FAR too many times in other stories. Better to show than tell, that's for sure.
9/2/2015 c3 Simianpower
There are already so many things wrong with this!
1) Unless Xeno took out ALL of his attackers, they wouldn't have left their casualties lying around. It's bad for their aura of invincibility if one guy took out "several" of them. In fact, they would have burned the house down around him and left the dark mark. "Plot requires otherwise" is not a good validation for this.
2) Luna, a 5th year-to-be, can do human transfiguration? Even on corpses that is WAY too advanced for her.
3) Harry is NOT the trusting sort. There's no way he'd have put all his stuff, explicitly including his wand and probably glasses, into a bag from an unknown party with unknown enchantments on it. No way in hell. Not after he'd just been duped at the DoM.
4) Animagus amulet? Really? Again, too easy, violates canon, and everyone and his cousin would have these.
Interesting story, but these first few chapters are pretty rough with unnecessary flaws. They don't add to the story, and interrupt the suspension of disbelief. I'd suggest removing them if you can.
There are already so many things wrong with this!
1) Unless Xeno took out ALL of his attackers, they wouldn't have left their casualties lying around. It's bad for their aura of invincibility if one guy took out "several" of them. In fact, they would have burned the house down around him and left the dark mark. "Plot requires otherwise" is not a good validation for this.
2) Luna, a 5th year-to-be, can do human transfiguration? Even on corpses that is WAY too advanced for her.
3) Harry is NOT the trusting sort. There's no way he'd have put all his stuff, explicitly including his wand and probably glasses, into a bag from an unknown party with unknown enchantments on it. No way in hell. Not after he'd just been duped at the DoM.
4) Animagus amulet? Really? Again, too easy, violates canon, and everyone and his cousin would have these.
Interesting story, but these first few chapters are pretty rough with unnecessary flaws. They don't add to the story, and interrupt the suspension of disbelief. I'd suggest removing them if you can.
8/11/2015 c1 Matt
Dam... That my friends is how you start a story. I am so hooked
Dam... That my friends is how you start a story. I am so hooked
7/9/2015 c26 
5GoodshipHarmony
Charming story - so sad about Luna being imprisoned though! I felt cold for her! You have a wonderful way of weaving words into a great story. Unique plot - just wonderful! Thank you.
5GoodshipHarmonyCharming story - so sad about Luna being imprisoned though! I felt cold for her! You have a wonderful way of weaving words into a great story. Unique plot - just wonderful! Thank you.
7/8/2015 c26 12birdwoman95
I don't know if I ever reviewed this story. I will say that it is one of my favorites. Well written, well thought out, original. Thank you so much for writing and sharing it.
12birdwoman95I don't know if I ever reviewed this story. I will say that it is one of my favorites. Well written, well thought out, original. Thank you so much for writing and sharing it.
7/3/2015 c26 1at-nightfall
Using a black powder revolver with extra cylinders instead of reloading cartridges actually makes sense. I know that reloading is done in the US, but it is usually not allowed in Germany, and gun control is even stricter in the UK than in Germany.
To be allowed a gun, you need a gun license.
For the black powder revolver you need at least a fireworks license, which is manageable, too.
For reloading, you need a license to handle explosives, which is much more difficult to get and to maintain than a gun license. The point is to limit high explosives to a very small group of people, which can be regularly checked.
1at-nightfallUsing a black powder revolver with extra cylinders instead of reloading cartridges actually makes sense. I know that reloading is done in the US, but it is usually not allowed in Germany, and gun control is even stricter in the UK than in Germany.
To be allowed a gun, you need a gun license.
For the black powder revolver you need at least a fireworks license, which is manageable, too.
For reloading, you need a license to handle explosives, which is much more difficult to get and to maintain than a gun license. The point is to limit high explosives to a very small group of people, which can be regularly checked.
4/14/2015 c20 stacygrrl2002
I like the M79 thumper. Lite and versatile 40mm, anti-personnel, high-ex, etc. The 50 cal will shoot through a concrete wall, or over a mile accurately. Very nice. I would think they would do well against a troll, especially if they can target a soft spot in the "t" zone
I like the M79 thumper. Lite and versatile 40mm, anti-personnel, high-ex, etc. The 50 cal will shoot through a concrete wall, or over a mile accurately. Very nice. I would think they would do well against a troll, especially if they can target a soft spot in the "t" zone
4/13/2015 c7 stacygrrl2002
kewl. Knew they were related as well as god brothers, and Neville was born the day prior to Harry, so it makes perfect sense.
kewl. Knew they were related as well as god brothers, and Neville was born the day prior to Harry, so it makes perfect sense.
4/13/2015 c1 stacygrrl2002
ahhh, man! Hate to see that happen to Luna. She's one of my favs. Now I've GOT to read it.
ahhh, man! Hate to see that happen to Luna. She's one of my favs. Now I've GOT to read it.