11/23/2011 c1 23Alby Mangroves
This is such a fascinating start! Your words have a great rhythm and I love how they flow from one awesome image to another.

My fave parts:

"The Quiletue have magic that I do not and while they roam, I remain earthbound." - I can almost hear the wistful tone of his voice as he says this.

Charlie's meditation and trying to "see" the color of Bella's walls was magical - you did a wonderful job of it! Really beautiful writing there.

"Botanists, hunters, campers; the forest teems with energy and activity and industry. So much life for such a deadly place." - What wonderful foreshadowing. Such a strong set of words.

"my refusal to open the curtain so he can shine his spotlight on the parts of my life I insist remain private infuriates him." - Excellent visual, I giggled when I read it, it made me so happy. It's kind of perfect!

"...remember when Renee was pregnant; how coffee made her sick, how even the taste of it on my lips was too much. It was easy to give it up." - I loved that. It reminded me of Mr. M and I giving up smoking when we were hoping to become pregnant. He didn't want to give up, but he did- cold turkey- right along with me.

"I never understood his choice but I never judged him for it either. People must be allowed to go to hell their own way." - Just... GUH! Beautiful words, and so Charlie! It's old-time wisdom, passed down, in this prosaic, earthy man. Love him. This is a really great start to something mysterious and fantastical, and i can't wait to see what it is.

Thanks for writing! xoAM

11/22/2011 c1 8Domysticated
SENSATIONAL first chapter! I'm already hooked by the chilling, original storyline and by your gorgeous words.

11/22/2011 c1 CindyWindy
What a great start to a unique, intriguing, and very detailed mystery! Filled with vivid visuals. For instance, you make the forest feel eerily alive and spooky. I wouldn't want to enter it.

Thanks for writing!

11/22/2011 c1 Crispy Anakin
I like the mystery you're setting up.