for Light and Love: Spring of Dreams1/16/2012 c5 
4Comrade Athelwine
*Finishes Reading and immediately takes on his reviewing hat*
First the bad points... Point... :P
I have all of the story (that you have uploaded through now) and i can safely say that i do still SOMETIMES feel a bit lost, though those moments are minuscule.
Now I understand that you use Animal physics to work with Animal Pregnancies, but I am quite turned off by it. It makes me fear that Amy and Sonic´s Ruling period will only be like... 10 Years, and that's just too little. Cause its a bit... strange to take ONE part of Animal Physics, In this case pregnancies, but rule out other ones, In this case ageing.
*Rips off his Bad hat and takes the good one back on*
I can safely say that I am Mesmerized by this story. I am Writing this while i should be listening to a Teacher talking about Religion, but im WAY more focussed on this XD
All the Characters are falling Greatly into place, the contrast between Past Amy and Present Amy are really Intriguing for me.
You have truly done well to make things not feel all to rushed :) Actions just flow by, but i can follow them with amazement, without feeling that they go by too fast :)
Strangely Enough, I have found myself becoming most Fond of Blitz ^^ I am a Massive SONAMY fan and would never let them off the first place, but Blitz is catching up fast! :)
Short message to Blitz, Your Right! Because you are That Awesome! XD You are one lucky Thing to be able to be in that story! ^^
Last Verdict for now though is that your Doing Absolutely Amazing, and im going to keep reading this story no matter how much time this steals from me :)
Five out of Six Hammers for now, and perhaps, I will like Blitz begin to bother you with a char, cause i got a Hedgehog i just never wrote about. *Evil laughter*
4Comrade Athelwine*Finishes Reading and immediately takes on his reviewing hat*
First the bad points... Point... :P
I have all of the story (that you have uploaded through now) and i can safely say that i do still SOMETIMES feel a bit lost, though those moments are minuscule.
Now I understand that you use Animal physics to work with Animal Pregnancies, but I am quite turned off by it. It makes me fear that Amy and Sonic´s Ruling period will only be like... 10 Years, and that's just too little. Cause its a bit... strange to take ONE part of Animal Physics, In this case pregnancies, but rule out other ones, In this case ageing.
*Rips off his Bad hat and takes the good one back on*
I can safely say that I am Mesmerized by this story. I am Writing this while i should be listening to a Teacher talking about Religion, but im WAY more focussed on this XD
All the Characters are falling Greatly into place, the contrast between Past Amy and Present Amy are really Intriguing for me.
You have truly done well to make things not feel all to rushed :) Actions just flow by, but i can follow them with amazement, without feeling that they go by too fast :)
Strangely Enough, I have found myself becoming most Fond of Blitz ^^ I am a Massive SONAMY fan and would never let them off the first place, but Blitz is catching up fast! :)
Short message to Blitz, Your Right! Because you are That Awesome! XD You are one lucky Thing to be able to be in that story! ^^
Last Verdict for now though is that your Doing Absolutely Amazing, and im going to keep reading this story no matter how much time this steals from me :)
Five out of Six Hammers for now, and perhaps, I will like Blitz begin to bother you with a char, cause i got a Hedgehog i just never wrote about. *Evil laughter*
1/15/2012 c2 Comrade Athelwine
Ok Normally I would read all the chapters before reviewing, But At this point, i just have to allow myself to squeal A moment and roll around on the floor laughing.
Sonic as a girl is just too funny an Image... XD
I already got parts of my mind purring for it and other parts just laughing like crazy.
Anyway, it really was a good chapter. In general you have improved greatly and since we are not sure where we are ATM I cant tell you off for not describing the environment too much XD
Ok now i will move on to the rest of the chapters and be more professional in my reviewing :)
Ok Normally I would read all the chapters before reviewing, But At this point, i just have to allow myself to squeal A moment and roll around on the floor laughing.
Sonic as a girl is just too funny an Image... XD
I already got parts of my mind purring for it and other parts just laughing like crazy.
Anyway, it really was a good chapter. In general you have improved greatly and since we are not sure where we are ATM I cant tell you off for not describing the environment too much XD
Ok now i will move on to the rest of the chapters and be more professional in my reviewing :)
12/29/2011 c4 20-Eeveelution-0
Wow! I love the detail you placed in that.. I truly envy you! :)
:O Is Amy... pregnant? Can't wait to find out, so please update soon! :)
20-Eeveelution-0Wow! I love the detail you placed in that.. I truly envy you! :)
:O Is Amy... pregnant? Can't wait to find out, so please update soon! :)
12/26/2011 c4 1thelovelylunareclipse
*CLAP CLAP CLAP* bravo! Encore! Felicidades! Maravilloso! Amazing!
Gurrrrrrl, those were some SKILL FULL descriptions :P I bow down to you :P lol I SUCK AT DESCRIPTIONS. But I still like to write them.
ANYWAY, the descriptions were amazing. Captivating the reader and making them want to swim with the flow of words... And that can only be achieved by great authors. For 13, yur amazing. Lol we're the same age and my descriptions can't even COMPARE to yours. Now onto the actual storyline!
Amy has grown a lot in her magic skills! Well, older amy, anyway. And she's GONNA HAVE A BABY? O.O wow, time really has passed in the previous story. And YAY! KIYA SR. COMES IN! Lol gotta love her :D but... Amy's scared? About Hecate's threat? And how is this story gonna play out? Soooo mannny questionnnnssssss :( hopefully they get answered soon *cough cough* :P and the sonamy moment in the past amy and sonic was cute. Kiya and blitz jr. always made me laugh. Especially with the "you talk like a book!" XD
Also, about the descriptions:
the length of descriptions is just as important as sentence variation. In sentence variation you can have a sentence of 3 words to a sentence of 15 words (that's just an example. You can go both shorter and larger). The switch between the two keeps the story/paragraph interesting, giving it a sort of...beat. And everyone loves a good beat. Its the same with descriptions, they should vary between long and short. This is justa random example of a part of nature. Guess what it is:
The thunder is deafening. With these huge, dark clouds above me, I have no choice but to stay, here, sitting in the mud while the rain slides down my back with its slow, wet fingers. Lay here in the mud, gazing at the sky. It's beautiful, the way the electric light rips it's way through the clouds, calling upon the thunder to yell again. The wind blows every way possible, pushing my soaked locks of ebony hair. Yet another bolt flies, and another clash goes. The wet earth underneath me is becoming one with my clothing. But I don't mind. I'll stay here, waiting. In the middle of this beautiful loud storm.
Well that was long. And bad. Not my best work. Lol well you did very well with both sentence and description variation! Way better than my piece of poop up there :P Keep it up!
You know your destiny... Update soon!
-Lokita
1thelovelylunareclipse*CLAP CLAP CLAP* bravo! Encore! Felicidades! Maravilloso! Amazing!
Gurrrrrrl, those were some SKILL FULL descriptions :P I bow down to you :P lol I SUCK AT DESCRIPTIONS. But I still like to write them.
ANYWAY, the descriptions were amazing. Captivating the reader and making them want to swim with the flow of words... And that can only be achieved by great authors. For 13, yur amazing. Lol we're the same age and my descriptions can't even COMPARE to yours. Now onto the actual storyline!
Amy has grown a lot in her magic skills! Well, older amy, anyway. And she's GONNA HAVE A BABY? O.O wow, time really has passed in the previous story. And YAY! KIYA SR. COMES IN! Lol gotta love her :D but... Amy's scared? About Hecate's threat? And how is this story gonna play out? Soooo mannny questionnnnssssss :( hopefully they get answered soon *cough cough* :P and the sonamy moment in the past amy and sonic was cute. Kiya and blitz jr. always made me laugh. Especially with the "you talk like a book!" XD
Also, about the descriptions:
the length of descriptions is just as important as sentence variation. In sentence variation you can have a sentence of 3 words to a sentence of 15 words (that's just an example. You can go both shorter and larger). The switch between the two keeps the story/paragraph interesting, giving it a sort of...beat. And everyone loves a good beat. Its the same with descriptions, they should vary between long and short. This is justa random example of a part of nature. Guess what it is:
The thunder is deafening. With these huge, dark clouds above me, I have no choice but to stay, here, sitting in the mud while the rain slides down my back with its slow, wet fingers. Lay here in the mud, gazing at the sky. It's beautiful, the way the electric light rips it's way through the clouds, calling upon the thunder to yell again. The wind blows every way possible, pushing my soaked locks of ebony hair. Yet another bolt flies, and another clash goes. The wet earth underneath me is becoming one with my clothing. But I don't mind. I'll stay here, waiting. In the middle of this beautiful loud storm.
Well that was long. And bad. Not my best work. Lol well you did very well with both sentence and description variation! Way better than my piece of poop up there :P Keep it up!
You know your destiny... Update soon!
-Lokita
12/26/2011 c4 Blitz the Hedgehog
Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant! :D *clapping and jumping* :D So proud of your use of adjectives! That the thesaurus came in handy didn't it? :3 ...No. Not the book! The dinosaur! :D RAWR! I'm a thesaurus! *eats a marshmallow* RAWR!
Okay, there goes my daily dose of make-believe dinosaur. :3 So now I'm going to be Miss teacher lady for a little while! I'll give you another tip on describing! :D
Let's not try to shove describing topics together into once sentence. They begin to feel cramped. :C When you're writing a sentence, be sure to focus on one idea at a time. Have a couple sentences dedicated to hair. How glossy it is or voluminous it is. Then have another on the shade of color it is. Then once you've SUCKED THE LIFE OUT OF THAT TOPIC (Muahaha :3) you move on to a totally different sentence about her eyes... how bright they are or the shape of them. Then her body...then a couple sentences about her clothes...and you get the idea. :) Also, speak from the main character's point of view. (doesn't have to be the same all the time :) Just according to what's going on at the time) Like...If you're Amy you would see children as adorable and innocent beings without a care in the world. If you are Eggman (sorry about the randomness :p) you would see kids as dangerous little runts who are destined to be servants and trained to assist him in world domination. (haha good luck with that!) So always speak from someone's point of view. It makes it exciting! :D When a guy is looking at a girl...you get in the mindset of a guy! (mindset: video games, football, sandwiches. ^.^ Done!) When a girl is looking at guy, you get in the mindset of a girl! (That won't be too hard -_-) Easy lemon squeeze-y! Try it out! :D
Do you want an example? Maybe it'll help...maybe not. Whatever...I'm writing! :D (I'm taking this one out of nowhere. :D You'll have to guess who the character is! :3)
Ex: Shadow's body paralyzed in awe. His feet didn't dare take another step further from the sight his crimson eyes laid upon. From across the street, the hedgehog had caught his eye. She seemed to stand out from the mundane crowd of pedestrians she weaved through. The world came to a standstill. His former thoughts of the chilly frost air on his fur had dissipated completely. He now only lived in the moment with her. The mysterious yet breathtaking sight of the aqua hedgehog across the street.
She floated on air, her steps agile along the concrete sidewalk and around the busy pedestrians. Her bare light blue arms clutched a small stack of hardcover books to her chest. Her fingers crushed tightly at the edges of the book. The cool air was not only numbing her freezing fingers, but her entire body was huddled in an effort to stay warm. The thin black jacket she wore paid no justice to her shivering form.
The black hedgehog's eyes skimmed the curves of her hourglass body. Her skin-tight blue jeans only encouraged his sudden urge to run his hands along her toned legs.
Almost as if she knew someone was watching her, the ocean blue hedgehog turned her head his direction. Shadow was met with her two dreamy orbs beaming his way. He nearly collapsed to his knees at the sudden wave of warmth that hit him from her gaze. The color reminded him of a blazing fire in a fireplace. That same fire had seemed to proliferate in his heart. He knew this new feeling was something he could get used to if she would only give him the privilege of staring into them longer.
(To be continued...?) Whatever! Hope that helped! (Damn I wrote A LOT!) :o Honetsly...not my best work :p but whatever! Oh goodness...I need to get out more. *face palm* Happy New Year! Enjoy your presents! :3 And...UUUUUUUUUpDDDDDaTTTTe SSSSoOOOOn! XD
Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant! :D *clapping and jumping* :D So proud of your use of adjectives! That the thesaurus came in handy didn't it? :3 ...No. Not the book! The dinosaur! :D RAWR! I'm a thesaurus! *eats a marshmallow* RAWR!
Okay, there goes my daily dose of make-believe dinosaur. :3 So now I'm going to be Miss teacher lady for a little while! I'll give you another tip on describing! :D
Let's not try to shove describing topics together into once sentence. They begin to feel cramped. :C When you're writing a sentence, be sure to focus on one idea at a time. Have a couple sentences dedicated to hair. How glossy it is or voluminous it is. Then have another on the shade of color it is. Then once you've SUCKED THE LIFE OUT OF THAT TOPIC (Muahaha :3) you move on to a totally different sentence about her eyes... how bright they are or the shape of them. Then her body...then a couple sentences about her clothes...and you get the idea. :) Also, speak from the main character's point of view. (doesn't have to be the same all the time :) Just according to what's going on at the time) Like...If you're Amy you would see children as adorable and innocent beings without a care in the world. If you are Eggman (sorry about the randomness :p) you would see kids as dangerous little runts who are destined to be servants and trained to assist him in world domination. (haha good luck with that!) So always speak from someone's point of view. It makes it exciting! :D When a guy is looking at a girl...you get in the mindset of a guy! (mindset: video games, football, sandwiches. ^.^ Done!) When a girl is looking at guy, you get in the mindset of a girl! (That won't be too hard -_-) Easy lemon squeeze-y! Try it out! :D
Do you want an example? Maybe it'll help...maybe not. Whatever...I'm writing! :D (I'm taking this one out of nowhere. :D You'll have to guess who the character is! :3)
Ex: Shadow's body paralyzed in awe. His feet didn't dare take another step further from the sight his crimson eyes laid upon. From across the street, the hedgehog had caught his eye. She seemed to stand out from the mundane crowd of pedestrians she weaved through. The world came to a standstill. His former thoughts of the chilly frost air on his fur had dissipated completely. He now only lived in the moment with her. The mysterious yet breathtaking sight of the aqua hedgehog across the street.
She floated on air, her steps agile along the concrete sidewalk and around the busy pedestrians. Her bare light blue arms clutched a small stack of hardcover books to her chest. Her fingers crushed tightly at the edges of the book. The cool air was not only numbing her freezing fingers, but her entire body was huddled in an effort to stay warm. The thin black jacket she wore paid no justice to her shivering form.
The black hedgehog's eyes skimmed the curves of her hourglass body. Her skin-tight blue jeans only encouraged his sudden urge to run his hands along her toned legs.
Almost as if she knew someone was watching her, the ocean blue hedgehog turned her head his direction. Shadow was met with her two dreamy orbs beaming his way. He nearly collapsed to his knees at the sudden wave of warmth that hit him from her gaze. The color reminded him of a blazing fire in a fireplace. That same fire had seemed to proliferate in his heart. He knew this new feeling was something he could get used to if she would only give him the privilege of staring into them longer.
(To be continued...?) Whatever! Hope that helped! (Damn I wrote A LOT!) :o Honetsly...not my best work :p but whatever! Oh goodness...I need to get out more. *face palm* Happy New Year! Enjoy your presents! :3 And...UUUUUUUUUpDDDDDaTTTTe SSSSoOOOOn! XD
12/26/2011 c4 Rin-sama and Len-kun
Woah... You're AWESOME at description! Whenever I try, I fail. Epically, yet with STYLE! XD Oh, oh!Lemme guess! The lady is Kiya! And.. o.O Amy's gonna have a baby? Oh my gosh, please update soon! I can't stand not knowing! :P
～♪ Dani ♪～
Woah... You're AWESOME at description! Whenever I try, I fail. Epically, yet with STYLE! XD Oh, oh!Lemme guess! The lady is Kiya! And.. o.O Amy's gonna have a baby? Oh my gosh, please update soon! I can't stand not knowing! :P
～♪ Dani ♪～
12/26/2011 c3 thelovelylunareclipse
As much as the conversations go, allow me to say this:
"tame his confusion"? were you hinting that I need to update? XD
LOL I'll stay on topic from now on :)
Seriously? Kiya Jr. has a long name too? :) lol as long as we don't see it that much I'll be fine with it :P And i have to say the whole time travel thing was a great idea. OF COURSE there was humor in this chapter, like when Kiya Jr. was telling Sonic and Amy about there past lives falling in love and amy jumping around because of that.
Your story is really interesting, and im in love with it :) it grows better with each chapter... and there's only 3! now that's saying something.
Im interested in what your planning to do in future chapers... so the mystery part in this really has me hooked.
you've seen how much of a fan I am now, so PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE UPDATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNN!
-Lokita :D
As much as the conversations go, allow me to say this:
"tame his confusion"? were you hinting that I need to update? XD
LOL I'll stay on topic from now on :)
Seriously? Kiya Jr. has a long name too? :) lol as long as we don't see it that much I'll be fine with it :P And i have to say the whole time travel thing was a great idea. OF COURSE there was humor in this chapter, like when Kiya Jr. was telling Sonic and Amy about there past lives falling in love and amy jumping around because of that.
Your story is really interesting, and im in love with it :) it grows better with each chapter... and there's only 3! now that's saying something.
Im interested in what your planning to do in future chapers... so the mystery part in this really has me hooked.
you've seen how much of a fan I am now, so PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE UPDATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNN!
-Lokita :D
12/21/2011 c3 Blitz the Hedgehog
Well, hello there, Lady Zel! *formal accent* I'd like to congratulate you on yet another magnificent chapter. *feminine clap* Brava! Brava! (Gosh! I hate being formal! D:)
Yep! I'm HERE! *kicks open door* BOOM BABY! haha! XD Yay for Christmas break! More time to relax and write! :D And get presents! Or...run into a pole like I did today. :D Hurray for clumsiness! Okay, before I say anything else, I'd like to apologize for my extremely long conversational reviews. (I'm a very talkative person XD). I'll stay on topic this time! Come on ADD work with me!
I'd like to point out my favorite thing about this chapter...ME! :D (not to sound self-centered or anything) but I'M IN THE STORY! -Well, indirectly...that's kinda my daughter...or maybe it's actually me from the past...O.O whoa. Crazy to think about :o- Either way, Blitz was in there! :D Btw...how old was I in this chapter? 10? 15? 24? 1? :o 153!
So for some reason I can never get off the topic of describing. When I read a story, I LOVE being able to picture characters in my mind. I know it's hard to describe people and settings, but it would be so fantastically great if you could write more than two sentences illustrating setting/people. :) For inspiration and help, I'll write a description of me in the scene where she has just met Amy and Sonic: (oh god, this'll be so lame :p)
Ex: The young golden hedgehog gazed up at the pink and cerulean hedgehogs before her. Bright aqueous droplets for eyes sparkled with glee at the sight of them. A large grin stretched across her tan muzzle. Revealing a vibrant smile that reflected her eccentric personality. Voluminous blonde quills floated around her face and fell like a golden waterfall down her back. Airy bangs gently caressed the right ride of her face, swooping slightly in an attempt to conceal her intense aqua eyes. Her hair bounced with life as she swung her yellow arms wide to embrace the two hedgehogs in an excited embrace. Her smooth, light blue silk dress shifted comfortably on her thin but appropriately curvaceous body. With the level of fitness she was in, it was obvious she had always occupied herself with energetic activities. With her arms spread wide, she spoke through her smile as she practically tackled the couple. "Uncle Sonic! Aunt Amy!" she sung in a sweet, lively tone as she stifled a giggle at her silly actions.
Whoa! I just wrote a whole paragraph about that off the top of my head! :o Yeah, I went kinda overboard on that and I know I'm not the BEST writer in the universe but it was worth a shot! Was that off topic...? Sorry it it seemed like it was. Well, that's my advice for you today! Keep up the good work and I'm glad you're feeling better, girl! :) If I don't hear from you before then...MERRY CHRISTMAS! :D (Hopefully you celebrate Christmas O.O;) And HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2012...apocalypse..? (Holds up gun) *click click* I'm ready. -.- Hope Santa brings you lots of presents and breaks into your house to eat your cookies. ^.^ Haha! Stay warm! And... ETADPU NOOS!
Oh crap! I'm spelling sdrawkcab again! :p LoL. I spelled lol backwards too. XD
Well, hello there, Lady Zel! *formal accent* I'd like to congratulate you on yet another magnificent chapter. *feminine clap* Brava! Brava! (Gosh! I hate being formal! D:)
Yep! I'm HERE! *kicks open door* BOOM BABY! haha! XD Yay for Christmas break! More time to relax and write! :D And get presents! Or...run into a pole like I did today. :D Hurray for clumsiness! Okay, before I say anything else, I'd like to apologize for my extremely long conversational reviews. (I'm a very talkative person XD). I'll stay on topic this time! Come on ADD work with me!
I'd like to point out my favorite thing about this chapter...ME! :D (not to sound self-centered or anything) but I'M IN THE STORY! -Well, indirectly...that's kinda my daughter...or maybe it's actually me from the past...O.O whoa. Crazy to think about :o- Either way, Blitz was in there! :D Btw...how old was I in this chapter? 10? 15? 24? 1? :o 153!
So for some reason I can never get off the topic of describing. When I read a story, I LOVE being able to picture characters in my mind. I know it's hard to describe people and settings, but it would be so fantastically great if you could write more than two sentences illustrating setting/people. :) For inspiration and help, I'll write a description of me in the scene where she has just met Amy and Sonic: (oh god, this'll be so lame :p)
Ex: The young golden hedgehog gazed up at the pink and cerulean hedgehogs before her. Bright aqueous droplets for eyes sparkled with glee at the sight of them. A large grin stretched across her tan muzzle. Revealing a vibrant smile that reflected her eccentric personality. Voluminous blonde quills floated around her face and fell like a golden waterfall down her back. Airy bangs gently caressed the right ride of her face, swooping slightly in an attempt to conceal her intense aqua eyes. Her hair bounced with life as she swung her yellow arms wide to embrace the two hedgehogs in an excited embrace. Her smooth, light blue silk dress shifted comfortably on her thin but appropriately curvaceous body. With the level of fitness she was in, it was obvious she had always occupied herself with energetic activities. With her arms spread wide, she spoke through her smile as she practically tackled the couple. "Uncle Sonic! Aunt Amy!" she sung in a sweet, lively tone as she stifled a giggle at her silly actions.
Whoa! I just wrote a whole paragraph about that off the top of my head! :o Yeah, I went kinda overboard on that and I know I'm not the BEST writer in the universe but it was worth a shot! Was that off topic...? Sorry it it seemed like it was. Well, that's my advice for you today! Keep up the good work and I'm glad you're feeling better, girl! :) If I don't hear from you before then...MERRY CHRISTMAS! :D (Hopefully you celebrate Christmas O.O;) And HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2012...apocalypse..? (Holds up gun) *click click* I'm ready. -.- Hope Santa brings you lots of presents and breaks into your house to eat your cookies. ^.^ Haha! Stay warm! And... ETADPU NOOS!
Oh crap! I'm spelling sdrawkcab again! :p LoL. I spelled lol backwards too. XD
12/21/2011 c3 Blitz the Hedgehog
Well, hello there, Lady Zel! *formal accent* I'd like to congratulate you on yet another magnificent chapter. *feminine clap* Brava! Brava! (Gosh! I hate being formal! D:)
Yep! I'm HERE! *kicks open door* BOOM BABY! haha! XD Yay for Christmas break! More time to relax and write! :D And get presents! Or...run into a pole like I did today. :D Hurray for clumsiness! Okay, before I say anything else, I'd like to apologize for my extremely long conversational reviews. (I'm a very talkative person XD). I'll stay on topic this time! Come on ADD work with me!
I'd like to point out my favorite thing about this chapter...ME! :D (not to sound self-centered or anything) but I'M IN THE STORY! -Well, indirectly...that's kinda my daughter...or maybe it's actually me from the past...O.O whoa. Crazy to think about :o- Either way, Blitz was in there! :D Btw...how old was I in this chapter? 10? 15? 24? 1? :o 153!
So for some reason I can never get off the topic of describing. When I read a story, I LOVE being able to picture characters in my mind. I know it's hard to describe people and settings, but it would be so fantastically great if you could write more than two sentences illustrating setting/people. :) For inspiration and help, I'll write a description of me in the scene where she has just met Amy and Sonic: (oh god, this'll be so lame :p)
Ex: The young golden hedgehog gazed up at the pink and cerulean hedgehogs before her. Bright aqueous droplets for eyes sparkled with glee at the sight of them. A large grin stretched across her tan muzzle. Revealing a vibrant smile that reflected her eccentric personality. Voluminous blonde quills floated around her face and fell like a golden waterfall down her back. Airy bangs gently caressed the right ride of her face, swooping slightly in an attempt to conceal her intense aqua eyes. Her hair bounced with life as she swung her yellow arms wide to embrace the two hedgehogs in an excited embrace. Her smooth, light blue silk dress shifted comfortably on her thin but appropriately curvaceous body. With the level of fitness she was in, it was obvious she had always occupied herself with energetic activities. With her arms spread wide, she spoke through her smile as she practically tackled the couple. "Uncle Sonic! Aunt Amy!" she sung in a sweet, lively tone as she stifled a giggle at her silly actions.
Whoa! I just wrote a whole paragraph about that off the top of my head! :o Yeah, I went kinda overboard on that and I know I'm not the BEST writer in the universe but it was worth a shot! Was that off topic...? Sorry it it seemed like it was. Well, that's my advice for you today! Keep up the good work and I'm glad you're feeling better, girl! :) If I don't hear from you before then...MERRY CHRISTMAS! :D (Hopefully you celebrate Christmas O.O;) And HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2012...apocalypse..? (Holds up gun) *click click* I'm ready. -.- Hope Santa brings you lots of presents and breaks into your house to eat your cookies. ^.^ Haha! Stay warm! And... ETADPU NOOS!
Oh crap! I'm spelling sdrawkcab again! :p LoL. I spelled lol backwards too. XD
Well, hello there, Lady Zel! *formal accent* I'd like to congratulate you on yet another magnificent chapter. *feminine clap* Brava! Brava! (Gosh! I hate being formal! D:)
Yep! I'm HERE! *kicks open door* BOOM BABY! haha! XD Yay for Christmas break! More time to relax and write! :D And get presents! Or...run into a pole like I did today. :D Hurray for clumsiness! Okay, before I say anything else, I'd like to apologize for my extremely long conversational reviews. (I'm a very talkative person XD). I'll stay on topic this time! Come on ADD work with me!
I'd like to point out my favorite thing about this chapter...ME! :D (not to sound self-centered or anything) but I'M IN THE STORY! -Well, indirectly...that's kinda my daughter...or maybe it's actually me from the past...O.O whoa. Crazy to think about :o- Either way, Blitz was in there! :D Btw...how old was I in this chapter? 10? 15? 24? 1? :o 153!
So for some reason I can never get off the topic of describing. When I read a story, I LOVE being able to picture characters in my mind. I know it's hard to describe people and settings, but it would be so fantastically great if you could write more than two sentences illustrating setting/people. :) For inspiration and help, I'll write a description of me in the scene where she has just met Amy and Sonic: (oh god, this'll be so lame :p)
Ex: The young golden hedgehog gazed up at the pink and cerulean hedgehogs before her. Bright aqueous droplets for eyes sparkled with glee at the sight of them. A large grin stretched across her tan muzzle. Revealing a vibrant smile that reflected her eccentric personality. Voluminous blonde quills floated around her face and fell like a golden waterfall down her back. Airy bangs gently caressed the right ride of her face, swooping slightly in an attempt to conceal her intense aqua eyes. Her hair bounced with life as she swung her yellow arms wide to embrace the two hedgehogs in an excited embrace. Her smooth, light blue silk dress shifted comfortably on her thin but appropriately curvaceous body. With the level of fitness she was in, it was obvious she had always occupied herself with energetic activities. With her arms spread wide, she spoke through her smile as she practically tackled the couple. "Uncle Sonic! Aunt Amy!" she sung in a sweet, lively tone as she stifled a giggle at her silly actions.
Whoa! I just wrote a whole paragraph about that off the top of my head! :o Yeah, I went kinda overboard on that and I know I'm not the BEST writer in the universe but it was worth a shot! Was that off topic...? Sorry it it seemed like it was. Well, that's my advice for you today! Keep up the good work and I'm glad you're feeling better, girl! :) If I don't hear from you before then...MERRY CHRISTMAS! :D (Hopefully you celebrate Christmas O.O;) And HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2012...apocalypse..? (Holds up gun) *click click* I'm ready. -.- Hope Santa brings you lots of presents and breaks into your house to eat your cookies. ^.^ Haha! Stay warm! And... ETADPU NOOS!
Oh crap! I'm spelling sdrawkcab again! :p LoL. I spelled lol backwards too. XD
12/20/2011 c3 Rin-sama and Len-kun
Aww! I wanted to see what happens nxt! Plz update soon! :)
～♪ Dani ♪～
Aww! I wanted to see what happens nxt! Plz update soon! :)
～♪ Dani ♪～
12/15/2011 c2 0-Eeveelution-0
I hope you feel better! I read the story, and I fell in love with it! Please update soon! :D
I hope you feel better! I read the story, and I fell in love with it! Please update soon! :D
12/9/2011 c2 Blitz the hedgehog
Wait...wait...WAIT! ...I don't have the longest review...? :O AWHH HELLS NOO! I WILL HAVE THE LONGEST REVIEW! I always have! AlWaYs WiLl. O.O Yes, I'm back! This crazy blonde sophomore from SoCal (hopefully pedophiles don't read this kind of stuff O.O) has returned because she finished all her homework -like a good girl ^.^- and has been staring at the ceiling for two hours with nothing to do. If you were wondering...my ceiling is NOT exciting...it's white. :) *cough* RACIST *cough* D: Not like that!
Since I'm your biggest fan, I figured it would be a good idea for you to get to know me better...PEDOS STAY AWAY!
1. Favorite drink: Dr.Pepper! :D Makes me hyper so I can dance in the street and scream at the sky :3
2. Hobbies: (I hate that word :P) I like volleyball, going to the beach, hanging out, drawing, and writing. I usually don't tell people I like art and writing, though. I actually don't tell ANYONE (yes, aNyOne) that I like Sonic the hedgehog. As a sophomore in high school, I have a reputation to uphold, and THAT is not what I want as part of my image. Girls would look at me like "Dude...she likes video game characters...? FrEaK." So I keep my mouth shut. Yeah, I hang out with -what some of you would consider- the 'popular group'. No, I don't diss other people, but I'm definitely outgoing. :) Yep, this is my dirty little secret...reading and writing reviews on a Sonic the Hedgehog fan-fiction website. (Don't tell my friends! :o)
3. No doubt, SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG IS A BADASS HOTTIE! Loved him from the moment he popped up on Sonic X a LONG time ago! :) At first, I loved Sonic. Still kinda like Sonic. But would totally choose Shadow over him! XD *fangirl squeal*
4. Music: Honestly, I love something that gets my heart racing with something I can dance to. Something with a sick beat and an even sicker guitar solo! :D My favorite band would have to be Nickelback...their songs have meaning and have AMAZING guitar solos. Plus, Chad Kroger (lead singer) has a voice to die for! :D
5. Sonic the hedgehog pairings: I like: Sonic-Amy (I totally think Amy should be with a guy that treats her right. Someone to protect her and have fun with her. -NOT like that [Pervert -_-] - Sonic totally fits her!)
Shadow-Amy (I really don't mind when Amy is paired with Shadow too. Shadow does have a softer side and is very passionate in what he loves. Amy has the fiery soul that rivals Shadow's, so they both end up a really cute couple!)
Silver-Blaze (They both come from the future...plus I can't imagine Silver with anyone else! XD)
Tails-Cream (Tails is hard-working and...well...SMART! Cream is sweet and helps however she can. They compliment each other perfectly! Plus, they're both adorable little cuties. :3)
Knuckles-Rouge (Rouge is mysterious, but knows how to pack a punch when she needs to. She's got a witty a temper just like the red echidna. Sure, Knuckles might not be the sharpest bowling ball on the shelf, but Rouge can help him where he flaws. They totally click! No matter how many 'fights' they have.)
Well, that's all I can think of right now. I know I didn't reference anything from your story, but I'll just save it for next time! Sorry. :p I'll tell you what pairs I hate in my next review. I promise hilarity! :3 Yep, this oughta be the longest review! :D I'm satisfied. Until next time, girl! ¡ µp∂å†∑ søÔπ !
Wait...wait...WAIT! ...I don't have the longest review...? :O AWHH HELLS NOO! I WILL HAVE THE LONGEST REVIEW! I always have! AlWaYs WiLl. O.O Yes, I'm back! This crazy blonde sophomore from SoCal (hopefully pedophiles don't read this kind of stuff O.O) has returned because she finished all her homework -like a good girl ^.^- and has been staring at the ceiling for two hours with nothing to do. If you were wondering...my ceiling is NOT exciting...it's white. :) *cough* RACIST *cough* D: Not like that!
Since I'm your biggest fan, I figured it would be a good idea for you to get to know me better...PEDOS STAY AWAY!
1. Favorite drink: Dr.Pepper! :D Makes me hyper so I can dance in the street and scream at the sky :3
2. Hobbies: (I hate that word :P) I like volleyball, going to the beach, hanging out, drawing, and writing. I usually don't tell people I like art and writing, though. I actually don't tell ANYONE (yes, aNyOne) that I like Sonic the hedgehog. As a sophomore in high school, I have a reputation to uphold, and THAT is not what I want as part of my image. Girls would look at me like "Dude...she likes video game characters...? FrEaK." So I keep my mouth shut. Yeah, I hang out with -what some of you would consider- the 'popular group'. No, I don't diss other people, but I'm definitely outgoing. :) Yep, this is my dirty little secret...reading and writing reviews on a Sonic the Hedgehog fan-fiction website. (Don't tell my friends! :o)
3. No doubt, SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG IS A BADASS HOTTIE! Loved him from the moment he popped up on Sonic X a LONG time ago! :) At first, I loved Sonic. Still kinda like Sonic. But would totally choose Shadow over him! XD *fangirl squeal*
4. Music: Honestly, I love something that gets my heart racing with something I can dance to. Something with a sick beat and an even sicker guitar solo! :D My favorite band would have to be Nickelback...their songs have meaning and have AMAZING guitar solos. Plus, Chad Kroger (lead singer) has a voice to die for! :D
5. Sonic the hedgehog pairings: I like: Sonic-Amy (I totally think Amy should be with a guy that treats her right. Someone to protect her and have fun with her. -NOT like that [Pervert -_-] - Sonic totally fits her!)
Shadow-Amy (I really don't mind when Amy is paired with Shadow too. Shadow does have a softer side and is very passionate in what he loves. Amy has the fiery soul that rivals Shadow's, so they both end up a really cute couple!)
Silver-Blaze (They both come from the future...plus I can't imagine Silver with anyone else! XD)
Tails-Cream (Tails is hard-working and...well...SMART! Cream is sweet and helps however she can. They compliment each other perfectly! Plus, they're both adorable little cuties. :3)
Knuckles-Rouge (Rouge is mysterious, but knows how to pack a punch when she needs to. She's got a witty a temper just like the red echidna. Sure, Knuckles might not be the sharpest bowling ball on the shelf, but Rouge can help him where he flaws. They totally click! No matter how many 'fights' they have.)
Well, that's all I can think of right now. I know I didn't reference anything from your story, but I'll just save it for next time! Sorry. :p I'll tell you what pairs I hate in my next review. I promise hilarity! :3 Yep, this oughta be the longest review! :D I'm satisfied. Until next time, girl! ¡ µp∂å†∑ søÔπ !
12/7/2011 c2 7Lil'Believer146
No why silver band shocking them? :'[
Well at least those two are together! :]
Haha i totally cracked up at that part with Soni- i mean Sonia X'D
and that grey hedgehog. XD
Oh those dudes and their dumb pick-up lines, especially the one with rearranging the alphabet ugh i hate that firetruck one too! XD
Well this was an awesome chappie!
Yeah Lina i feel your pain hosting is terrible! XD
Awww, get better soon Zel :']
Try and update as fast as you can ok Zel and Lina! :]
7Lil'Believer146No why silver band shocking them? :'[
Well at least those two are together! :]
Haha i totally cracked up at that part with Soni- i mean Sonia X'D
and that grey hedgehog. XD
Oh those dudes and their dumb pick-up lines, especially the one with rearranging the alphabet ugh i hate that firetruck one too! XD
Well this was an awesome chappie!
Yeah Lina i feel your pain hosting is terrible! XD
Awww, get better soon Zel :']
Try and update as fast as you can ok Zel and Lina! :]