for Harry Potter and the Exodus of Light1/11 c2 Casual
I can see why you gave up on this, it's not very good. Glad you stopped.
I can see why you gave up on this, it's not very good. Glad you stopped.
5/28/2012 c2 Separ
Very nice story so far, the wizarding world develops like I thought it would ...
Looking forward to see the emergency session ...
Very nice story so far, the wizarding world develops like I thought it would ...
Looking forward to see the emergency session ...
2/14/2012 c2 Guest
Sorry but you need to seriously work on your grammar and narration. Instead of defining what happened in the past *show* it. You try to create a different world by declaration but it doesn't work that way.
Sorry but you need to seriously work on your grammar and narration. Instead of defining what happened in the past *show* it. You try to create a different world by declaration but it doesn't work that way.
2/14/2012 c2 
3alix33
"an address not know to exist outside of a small group of people as the only entrance was through the front doors of the only location of Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes." - "not known to exist".
"I just prefer my hair to be more controllable than the bushy mess that I'm know for." - "bushy mess that I'm known for".
"to 'minimized the damage to the Wizarding World'." - "to minimize".
"both have managed to increase attention in today's meeting." - "attention to today's".
"What would I ever do with you," - "do without you".
3alix33"an address not know to exist outside of a small group of people as the only entrance was through the front doors of the only location of Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes." - "not known to exist".
"I just prefer my hair to be more controllable than the bushy mess that I'm know for." - "bushy mess that I'm known for".
"to 'minimized the damage to the Wizarding World'." - "to minimize".
"both have managed to increase attention in today's meeting." - "attention to today's".
"What would I ever do with you," - "do without you".
2/14/2012 c2 7Cuervo Blanco
I had to congrat you. Now I hate percy weasley more than I thought posible.
The sad thing about his is that I can see it TOTALLy happening and is more reliable than Jo epilogue.
Sugestion, while female population is the one that usually pay dearly for our mistakes, you may include some male parts on it too. If they are pureblood, it may haave a better impact. I know Neville is a given (unless in this twilight zone Neville is in the darker side of "light"), but imaging a wolrd when Blaise Zabini or Michael Turner join Harry's exudus...
Great chapter, albait a bit short...
readya soon.
7Cuervo BlancoI had to congrat you. Now I hate percy weasley more than I thought posible.
The sad thing about his is that I can see it TOTALLy happening and is more reliable than Jo epilogue.
Sugestion, while female population is the one that usually pay dearly for our mistakes, you may include some male parts on it too. If they are pureblood, it may haave a better impact. I know Neville is a given (unless in this twilight zone Neville is in the darker side of "light"), but imaging a wolrd when Blaise Zabini or Michael Turner join Harry's exudus...
Great chapter, albait a bit short...
readya soon.
2/7/2012 c1 3alix33
"I do not make anything other than personal enjoyment from writing this (or any other) work, nor do I intend to quit my day job and start." - There was, if memory serves, a Spanish Harry Potter fic author who got a book contract on the strength of an HP fic she wrote.
"Fred and George are good (and both are alive and well)" - Yay!
"The Man-Who-Won and his fiance were perhaps the most frequently seen of the 'Heroes' as of late," - "Man-Who-Won and his fiancée".
3alix33"I do not make anything other than personal enjoyment from writing this (or any other) work, nor do I intend to quit my day job and start." - There was, if memory serves, a Spanish Harry Potter fic author who got a book contract on the strength of an HP fic she wrote.
"Fred and George are good (and both are alive and well)" - Yay!
"The Man-Who-Won and his fiance were perhaps the most frequently seen of the 'Heroes' as of late," - "Man-Who-Won and his fiancée".
2/7/2012 c1 huh
seems intresting add more
seems intresting add more
2/7/2012 c1 7Cuervo Blanco
At the moment, I'm caught by the introduction. It has me hooked. I have an idea of what is going to happen, but at the same time has me second guessing myself, so, the intrigue is blazing.
pd: that bit of pansy/percy almost made me throw up... but i can see it totally coming...
7Cuervo BlancoAt the moment, I'm caught by the introduction. It has me hooked. I have an idea of what is going to happen, but at the same time has me second guessing myself, so, the intrigue is blazing.
pd: that bit of pansy/percy almost made me throw up... but i can see it totally coming...