for A Day Like Any Other5/9 c1 shenny guest
I hope the unnecessarily harsh reviews didn't stop your writing. Yes there were many improvements that could have been made, but the first story is always the hardest and it is a brave thing to post a piece of yourself for all the world to see! So many others don't have that courage, thank you for sharing this with us. I thought the premise was cute and the story was easy to follow. I hope you are still out there in the world living you best life.
I hope the unnecessarily harsh reviews didn't stop your writing. Yes there were many improvements that could have been made, but the first story is always the hardest and it is a brave thing to post a piece of yourself for all the world to see! So many others don't have that courage, thank you for sharing this with us. I thought the premise was cute and the story was easy to follow. I hope you are still out there in the world living you best life.
9/21/2013 c1 Guest
Your writing is abysmal.
Your writing is abysmal.
8/4/2013 c1 Guest
Its LEGEN wait for it DARY
Its LEGEN wait for it DARY
11/28/2012 c1 u suck
U suck at writing. Please NEVER touch your keyboard again. I have to go wash my eyes out from the crap you just threw in them.
U suck at writing. Please NEVER touch your keyboard again. I have to go wash my eyes out from the crap you just threw in them.
3/8/2012 c1 
127Shenandoah76209
My suggestion would be to think about how to show what's happening instead of simply telling us what's going on. How did Penny talk him into the wine? What is Sheldon feeling when he finally kisses Penny? Give us all five senses. I like the premise but you need to work on considering all the dimensions and perspectives of how things are happening.
From a simple grammatical perspective you need to work on developing paragraphs. Right now you have a ton of sentences but nothing develops from them. Take your time, think about what you want to happen and enjoy the process of writing, don't speed through it.
In my classes they always said if you're not working on your writing don't waste your time, read something instead. When you read try to think about how the book you're reading is written. How does the author show you what's happening? How are sensations described, with comparisons or with simple adverbs? If you read other fan fiction think about how those authors phrase things, what do you like? How does it make you feel? You want your audience to feel everything your characters feel and everything you feel.
If you really love writing don't stop. Just keep reading and working at it. I can telll a huge difference between what I wrote five years ago and what I write now. So don't get discouraged, just keep at it.
127Shenandoah76209My suggestion would be to think about how to show what's happening instead of simply telling us what's going on. How did Penny talk him into the wine? What is Sheldon feeling when he finally kisses Penny? Give us all five senses. I like the premise but you need to work on considering all the dimensions and perspectives of how things are happening.
From a simple grammatical perspective you need to work on developing paragraphs. Right now you have a ton of sentences but nothing develops from them. Take your time, think about what you want to happen and enjoy the process of writing, don't speed through it.
In my classes they always said if you're not working on your writing don't waste your time, read something instead. When you read try to think about how the book you're reading is written. How does the author show you what's happening? How are sensations described, with comparisons or with simple adverbs? If you read other fan fiction think about how those authors phrase things, what do you like? How does it make you feel? You want your audience to feel everything your characters feel and everything you feel.
If you really love writing don't stop. Just keep reading and working at it. I can telll a huge difference between what I wrote five years ago and what I write now. So don't get discouraged, just keep at it.
2/29/2012 c1 19Tjay M
You made great strides from the last version of this fic you posted... I would still recommend a beta to help guide you from this point. Listen to your beta reader. The are skilled and will only help you grow as a writer. Listen to the reviews you get they are only to help you see the mistakes you made. Keep trying and you'll get it!
19Tjay MYou made great strides from the last version of this fic you posted... I would still recommend a beta to help guide you from this point. Listen to your beta reader. The are skilled and will only help you grow as a writer. Listen to the reviews you get they are only to help you see the mistakes you made. Keep trying and you'll get it!
2/28/2012 c1 Ishipdrapple
Wow. I was ten sentances in and knew I wouldn't be able Ronald it through. Your spelling/grammar is that of a fifty grader.
Wow. I was ten sentances in and knew I wouldn't be able Ronald it through. Your spelling/grammar is that of a fifty grader.
2/27/2012 c1 ug
You have no concept of characterization, punctuation, or grammar. Please take a writing course and refrain from writing anything again until you do. I couldn't even get through this.
You have no concept of characterization, punctuation, or grammar. Please take a writing course and refrain from writing anything again until you do. I couldn't even get through this.
2/27/2012 c1 Guest
Well not sure where to start. First well done on kind of putting your story right you've still missed one or two parts but way better then before. You have Sheldon way OOC, which kind of pale's when you have: Penny&Sheldon having sex getting married and having twins!Finding out Leonard is gay (ok that one was on the cards) Raj is getting married to Missy and having a baby. Did I miss anything. Yes you sure put a lot into one story. May have been better to do say two maybe three chapters. You've made a start so carry on
Well not sure where to start. First well done on kind of putting your story right you've still missed one or two parts but way better then before. You have Sheldon way OOC, which kind of pale's when you have: Penny&Sheldon having sex getting married and having twins!Finding out Leonard is gay (ok that one was on the cards) Raj is getting married to Missy and having a baby. Did I miss anything. Yes you sure put a lot into one story. May have been better to do say two maybe three chapters. You've made a start so carry on