for Legacy3/4/2012 c1 kero123
To lazy to log in again but I love avenged sevenfold and nightmare but I like Alesana way better. Anyways ignore my rambling I really like this story so far hope you continue. Oh and check your grammer to. Update soon please.
To lazy to log in again but I love avenged sevenfold and nightmare but I like Alesana way better. Anyways ignore my rambling I really like this story so far hope you continue. Oh and check your grammer to. Update soon please.
3/4/2012 c1 Five
Bad grammar, unneeded information, lack of needed information at parts, repetition of words, and lack of correct punctuation in some areas. Story is just starting out, but seems rather interesting so far. Good use of back story, but don't make the assumption that everyone knows what you're talking about (Ex: Lips the same color as his eyes. Why not just tell them they're ruby red?). And remember that elves don't exist on Gaia in FFVII
Bad grammar, unneeded information, lack of needed information at parts, repetition of words, and lack of correct punctuation in some areas. Story is just starting out, but seems rather interesting so far. Good use of back story, but don't make the assumption that everyone knows what you're talking about (Ex: Lips the same color as his eyes. Why not just tell them they're ruby red?). And remember that elves don't exist on Gaia in FFVII