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for Razor's Edge: Requiem

11/7/2016 c42 2A Darker Path
Oh my fucking god... Perfect, absolutely perfect. That was how Bioware should have done it, I can't think of a single thing to criticize, well done and happy N7 day.

11/7/2016 c42 3etheral-23
10/26/2016 c41 Tomon
You're always so amazing and using the best of canon and building something even better on top of it :)
Amazing preparation for the final fight. While on one hand sad that this breathtaking tale is nearing it's completion I still can't wait to read how will everything end.
More than a good job.
9/4/2016 c41 4Aronim
Oh, it's all coming back. I'm simultaneously excited and really sad, both that we are reaching the end and heartbroken by the emotion that this chapter evokes. This is, as it often is, as emotional as the game, but more organic and thus better.

So ominous and sad, those "we're not really saying goodbye, but we are" moments.

Also: I told you you weren't going to squeeze it into one chapter ;)

More specifics:

Great vision, as always. Also a nice little touch that this chapter begins and ends with a turian.

Good wakening. Nice moment with Tali and Hannah. And I really like the suiting up moment. It portrays the dread very well and is both heartbreaking and sweet.

Wrex is the best. Well, everyone is. Every interaction here was heartbreaking but good.

But you know me. So get ready for nitpicks! Be advised that I am humbly suggesting and not just getting on my high horse.

"The sky above almost as gray..." needs an "is".

Is it on purpose that the last few lines of his vision is in past tense instead of present, like the rest of the vision/dream?

Using "for the first time, Shepard didn't wake in a sudden lurch" makes it sound like he's woken like that since he was a child. I'm guessing you mean for the first time he doesn't wake from Saren dreams like that or for the first time in a long while, but without clarification, it sounds like Shep has been having catapult nightmares every night his entire life.

Isn't it "sent a small start through him" when it is past tense? And can you use "start" like that? You can do something with a start, but I've never heard it as something that can move through you.

Think it is "hyper-accelerated" with a hyphen, but I might be wrong.

"A shot rang out at a husk crumbled to the dusty ground". You either missed a "and it" or need to replace "at" with "and".

"When his fingers brushed against a wall" should be followed by "it blew up a cloud of dust", not "blowing up." You are missing a main verb in that sentence. Or losing the "When" could fix it too.

"Think "there are always Reapers surrounding it" is better than "constantly Reapers...".

This is pure suggestion: "Far above" might sound better than "in the space above".

Missed a "greater" when you wrote "buzzed with greater and energy".

Missed a "the" in "other than Grizzly transports they were using".

Great chapter. A lot of the dialogue is obviously lifted directly from the game, but as I said, you elevate it to a higher level, because you make it all more organic. And all your original content is great.

As always, good work. And I'm dreading and looking forward to the next chapter. I honestly don't quite know what exactly you have planned, how much I'm going to have to be sad for the lost and what exactly it is that makes Shepard so melancholic, because it seems he is not just sad for the uncountable deaths the holding action is going to cause.

Happy writing.
8/30/2016 c41 wanako
oh boy, here come all my feels. Man it's been a long time coming but I'm very excited about this last chapter. A bit bittersweet. Also, Shepard's speech was a nice reference to the original Independence Day film. ;)
8/30/2016 c41 Xhydralisk
In every single one of my playthroughs, this part was always so melancholy. A silence before the storm; a reprieve before they all throw themselves into the meat grinder.
8/29/2016 c41 Vladnim
Well done.
I appreciate the last goodbye. Which reminds me of that song...

I saw the light fade from the sky
On the wind I heard a sigh
As the snowflakes cover my fallen brothers
I will say this last goodbye
8/28/2016 c41 Kel
You're alive!

If I had a heart for powerful moments then this chapter would have brought tears to my eye. I dont, but that doesnt make me blind - this was a good way to break the waiting and prepare the team for the comming battle. The galaxy will tremble at the roar of these allies and the thumping of their boots as they charge.

Thus, you better keep the standard high. No pressure. :P
Keep being awesome, TD!
8/28/2016 c41 xaeroxiii
Ahhh i understand you eagerness to finish the story but damn it would've been an epic read reading on the clash of the new systems alliance against the reapers. I've been following this story for years now and i'm glad it's finally coming to a conclusion they way many ME fans have always wished it would in the actual games. Just reading and imagining the united front of all the species including the Rachni just oozes epic showdown.
Keep up the good work for the final chapters. I'm looking forward to your approach on the Illusive man and that annoying child. :)
8/28/2016 c41 C. Anonymous
Whew, this is shaping up to be one helluva ending. I've gotta say that your characters are very well done and, with the exception of a few minor spelling errors here and there, the life you breathe into the universe is fantastic.

Thanks for taking the time to craft such a wonderful piece of fiction, one that I'm sure will be read and re-read for many years to come.
8/27/2016 c41 2Rapter267
Four years and near five months since this began. Thank you for this story, now go fix what EA/Bioware screwed up. Also, there's a good bit of dialogue between Shepard and Anderson that got cut from the game. I think it would be good inspiration for ya.
8/27/2016 c41 2JukedSolid
I have been following along with this story for a long time and I am so lucky that you continued to stick with your story until the end. You have really done great justice to the characters of this great series and I couldn't have asked for better. Thank you very much for writing, and have a great week.
8/26/2016 c41 3RohanVos
I am glad that you split the chapter that means I have another awesome chapter to look forward to :)
8/26/2016 c41 1Anime obsessed fan
On the one hand, sad not to see the ending, but on the other hand, I'm happy there is still more to come. As always, I love your expansion of the game's story, like naming Dagger and Spear fleets. Not to mention a faint hope that some familiar characters might still be holding out on the Citadel (I almost hope the Council is still alive so they can really see the result of their incompetence).

Another interesting change is having Shepard's guilt hanging over most of his interactions though. (My random guess is he's planning to destroy the Sol relay to wipe out the gathered Reaper forces if the Crucible fails.) One last Saren dream huh. Honestly I like this Saren, as in some ways he was a tragic figure (well, I like him better than the Illusive Man who went way over the line long ago without full indoctrination as an excuse).

Wonder how many other old friends Shepard will check in with. Covered most of the original crew (yay Wrex, Ashley, Liara) and always love that Shepard and Vakarian moment. Figures Javik would like that speech. Tali's moment should be especially poignant.

This has been a magnificent ride, and its almost over, looking forward to the conclusion.
8/26/2016 c21 Redman117
Man just founded your story and I got to say it's been great reading.

A loyal reader Redman117.
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