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6/16/2012 c8 Rose Brady
Amazing as always! Brilliant writing, keep on updating!
6/14/2012 c9 2Air In here
I really like this chapter. It was a nice change from the past two, which were mainly solitairy, which was needed (because nearly nobody spends every waking moment with at leasr one person). I think you kept Warren in character quite well. I think you should put Keepsie in the Save the Citizen. It'd be interesting to see more of her powers and abilities, which we haven't seen much of.

Can't wait for more!

Air In here
6/11/2012 c9 35KnightlyWordsmith
Since you asked so nicely, and I know how good it feels to get feedback on how in character you're keeping everyone, I reckoned that this chapter deserved a review. (Not that they don't all, but I've been very lazy about reviewing as of late).

As for your characterization of Warren I think you've done a good job. He's in character for the most part, but what I especially loved was how on this chapter you delved a little deeper into his character. The reference to how most people avoid him was something simple, yet it adds another layer to how complex of a character he is, and is something I don't really remeber them delving into in the movie (Mind you I haven't seen it in ages so I could be wrong on that account).

One thing that I found a little off was when he grabbed Keepsie's belt loops. The fact that he'd grab her made sense with his character, he's the type to get what he wants by using force, but I dunno just the fact that he grabbed her beltloops seemed a little um...perverted(?) for his character.

And we are finally getting to Save the Citizen! *Trumpets and applause*

I know that I've said earlier how I don't really like OCs going to much not the main plot, but I guess this really doesn't affect much because Will and Warren can still gave their go, but I have found myself hoping that Keepsie would be part of this match.

Although, you know if I had it my way Zach would definitely factor in there somewhere. I don't care what you say the two just make to much sense to me to not ship them!
6/11/2012 c9 2Bucky Flavored Skittles
I love the new summary! :D

I think Warren is in character... although I don't think you should trust my opinion! Hehe.

Well if she DOES get into the STS match, maybe Warren will nurse HER back to health! Bwahaha! xDD So it wouldn't really matter in my opinion, as long as her and Warren can continue the talk they were having before Coach Boom-shaka-laka-laka interrupted them!

And yes! Skittles! Ahhh my favorite love! :D :D... well that's a lie, Skittles are after Warren of course!

It was the easiest chapter for you to write? That's awesome, because it's a really good chapter! Hehe and of course I love your pervy side, it's something else we both have in common...

Warren Peacefemales jizzing everywhere... even if they don't have the parts! And I loved the fact she told him off! Hahaha it had my laughing because first she's all scared then RAWR she snaps! Hehe! Can't wait to read more (YES, I AM IN FACT SUGAR HIGH) so update whenever you can! :D

SHE BETTER KICK ICY'S ASS!

End.
6/11/2012 c9 MasRnR
Good job))) Though I usually don't like messing with the original plot this story is nice. I guess you don't like Icy that much? Let Icy play vs Keepsie in a game, a little fight for "just-talking-but-kind-of-flirting-with-Warren-boy". No way Icy didn't notice they had been late for class together. BTW why she was crying? Warren said her many bad things? Poor love-stroken girl...
6/11/2012 c9 Amber-Jade James
Great chapter! Keep up the good work!

Cheers

AJ
6/11/2012 c9 2AikoRose
I think your doing great with his character, although I think he will probably be either angry later due to her reaction, or try apologizing again as she did have a point. You don't just grab a young woman to get her attention. But, onto the main point of this. That was a awesome chapter, and I loved how she figured out that it was a techno who opened her locker. And how Warren chased after her for answers about Icy, that was a great part you know. Though personally I think I would have melted inside if warren grabbed me by my belt loops...silly fangirlness. I think she shoul be picked to fight with him, but by boomer for them being late instead. It makes sense after all.
6/10/2012 c8 AikoRose
Hmmm how odd. Wonder what was up with Freezey...and the strange street woman...and her mother also. I wonder if there is some sort of connection...
6/9/2012 c8 1Pein's Kid
love it!
6/8/2012 c8 2Bucky Flavored Skittles
"Any other day, I would welcome it with open arms (and possibly open legs)"

I. Love. You. Hahaha, I agree with Keeps wholeheartedly! Hehe, I hope she doesn't get in trouble with the creep girl from the block- and I also hope they figure out who she is soon! Hmm and Freeze Girl... crying? Hmm she's probably a girl who puts up a front in front of everyone! And I liked the family interaction! It really proves that her family is normal! Well... normal-enough! xD Can't wait to read more!
6/8/2012 c8 Amber-Jade James
Yeah for updates! Great chapter!

Cheers

AJ
6/7/2012 c7 Amber-Jade James
Just found your storie and I love it! Looking forward to an update!

Cheers,

AJ James
6/3/2012 c7 2fey4life
I really like it. The characters are in character, which is a nice change. Keepsie is really perfect, her name is original and makes me laugh whenever I hear it and that fits her character very well. Can't wait for the next chapter!
6/3/2012 c7 person
wow, good job on this chapter. i think warren might have been a little ooc with the whole 'thank you' thing, because i think he would probably just ignore it. but nice chap anyway.
6/2/2012 c7 Crystal Moon Magic
Join us? That odd. One, who sent it? secondly why do they want a side kick? is it who she knows or what she can do. Will Warren want to protect her when he sees her locker?
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