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for Avatar of Victory

8/21/2012 c8 theBSDude
I'd never connect the inusann to the Thorian before...
8/20/2012 c7 delta7
I continue to love this story. I hope in the next chapter we will see more of the Avatar elements of the story. Keep up the good work.
8/15/2012 c1 1gaara king of the sand
this is a amazing story i hop to finish it soon but i'm not making any promises till next message bye
8/10/2012 c7 AlleluiaElizabet
I realized that I forgot to add one of my favorite moments from this chapter in my review: Garrus talking Shepard down when she was about to kill Lizbeth. It could allow for some interesting parallels with Sidonis later on. (Assuming you have things happen similar to the game there, of course.) And interaction likes that fleshes out their relationship to each other even more. Garrus is one of my favorites so character/relationship development is always good to see.
8/10/2012 c7 3AlleluiaElizabeth
I liked the start of this chapter. I do wonder about Sajuuk’s logic here: “It is still folly. They are too primitive. Too few, and without males, doomed to die out.” Obviously, the asari survived without males to this point, so why are they doomed to die out now?

I am on the fence about Sajuuk. He’s… well, a bit of a jerk. Then again, he’s in a high pressure, no holds barred, the galaxy has gone to hell and we could die any moment type of environment. And he’s saddled with the responsibility of being the Avatar during the mother of all war times. So, his attitude is understandable. And he has his good moments, like his attitude towards Kija a few chapters ago. Here, though? Yeah made me dislike him again. Lol Emotional rollercoaster, that one.

Also, poor Professor Athame. I was totally expecting him to save them somehow, though. Guess he gets involved with the asari back on Thessia later on, then?

Wrex’s grandfather got killed by some asari he had a feud with. That seems to be a common problem with krogan. (Asari and krogan feuding, I mean.) When he told that bit of story, it made me think of Aethyta’s parents. Wrex isn’t her (half?)nephew, is he? Making him Liara’s cousin? Cus that’d be hilarious and excellent at the same time.

I was happy to see Shepard bringing the whole group on to Feros, with Kaidan basically playing the role of EDI. I mean, really, why should she be limited to 2 other squadmates? Silly game designers. Laughed out loud about the rest being needed to keep Tali and Liara alive. Though Tali has Chikkita and Liara is doing pretty well so far with her “nigh impervious armor”. Lol

And speaking of game design, I like all the improvements/changes you’ve made to the Feros mission so far. For example, having to do the sidequests while waiting for colonists to repair their own ATV is a cool change, IMO. (Also, I suppose Shep’s getting some paragon points with it. Can’t hurt. Lol) And the krogan troops being shown to be very young. It not only sets up the cloning facility on Virmire a bit, but Wrex’s reaction there was great to read.

I enjoyed the banter in the group through the whole chapter. Glad Jack can bond with Wrex and Garrus over a mutual love of explosions, for example. Lol

Lizbeth’s password being “Zutara4life”? Loved it. Zutarians represent! :P

I’ve often wondered what that “altar” in the ExoGeni building was all about. I mean, why was it set up there in the first place? Were the geth planning on staying on Feros or did it serve some temporary function? And what *was* the glowing orb of light exactly? In-game, after ME3, I thought Tali might have been wrong about it being an altar; instead maybe it was a link to the heretic consensus or something. Here, since this is the avatar universe, I suppose it could be related to the actual spirit world somehow. I am interested to see what, if anything, will come from that.

So, since Avatars always seem to get visions from near death experiences, I am guessing that “You traitor!” line wasn’t random. It was a nice change to see that from an outside perspective, rather than following Shepard into it. Though, I am very curious about what she saw, now.

And finally, the Legion cameo. I don’t know when in this story you are actually going to have him meet Shepard, but the fact he is even there observing is just so cool.

Really looking forward to the next chapter. :)
8/9/2012 c7 1Azrael Duke
Obviously, Cerberus here will be called the Dai Li. At least, that's what I think you're going for, anyways. I could be wrong.

I have to say my favorite part of this whole chapter was the Legion cameo. Wondering if he's going to actually make an appearance to the rest of the crew - although I would think that Tali at this point would suffer not to speak to a geth. And Shepard would just shoot him on the spot. Only when she shifts closer to Paragon would she even entertain the idea of actually conversing with a geth.

My gut tells me you're sizing up a Tali/Garrus pairing in here as well. Though whether it comes quicker than the 'canon' pairing is probably up to you. As for Shepard, Kaidan and Thane would probably suit her best - yes, James Vega is a sexy, sexy beast, but she needs her 'shoulder angels' so to speak - the kind that she'll hold in high opinion. I also have the crazy crack pairing idea of Jacob with Nilsdottir - Like I said, crazy, but it might work.
8/8/2012 c7 N3phtys
I have to say, Avatar of Victory pushed 3Families to the second place in my personal Top-3.

[here include the normal praising (and whatever) you do deserve]

So far:
I don't think Liara and Jack are that much changed in character... they just seem more... like they are in ME2 and 3 (or at least on their way, Liara still needs badassness; Nilsdottir seems okay).
Also, the entire fic so far feels like a remastered Mass Effect (remastered by a great fan that is), more than a crossover... but it's nice anyway. I can live with 50% Mass Effect, 30% Avatar and 20% Rule of Cool!

Only major critique so far: Shepard takes to many squad mates with her.
Of course, more firepower and taking every specialist for everything seems a good choice at first; but it really takes away the focus some characters need. A squad with 3 people like in the game seems not enough but a normal 4-"things"-fireteam seems more in line with flexibility and mobility... also, it gives each character more screen time.
7 NPCs like Lizbeth are way too many.
Of course, Shepard taking less people with her would need a good reason...

but the entire party size is so far the only thing bugging me.
8/4/2012 c7 11OMAC001
Good story. Update soon
7/22/2012 c6 3AlleluiaElizabeth
This story is great so far. I love how you have incorporated bending into the ME universe. I think my favorite section of this chapter was Garrus and Shepard discussing bending as they watched the sparring session in Omashu. The idea that bending can be taught to the other species is a really interesting one. And I like that humanity is so freely doing so. (Go, Avatar Hong, I guess? lol)

Also, loved the extra depth you are giving to the different species. Things we didn't necessarily hear in-game, but make sense. Again, Garrus comes to mind, talking about how turians apparently train with mockups of human bases or how he'd "seen a lot of Earth" back on Palaven. Makes sense with what we know about turians that they are still keeping an eye on humanity, so to speak, even though there's currently peace.

I haven't reviewed previous chapters, so I just wanted to say here that how you handled humanity's first contact? So excellent. A Bei Fong was so perfect there. XD And I love that the first species was the krogan and how its resulted in this bond between the krogan and the humans that we keep seeing play out- not just with Adeks being an accepted member of an Alliance crew, but Shep's dismissal of Wrex as alien and just her general easy acceptance of him. I love the krogan and I love Wrex so its heartwarming to see. I mean, not all krogan are under the same banner, of course, but its still nice they seem to have a ready ally in this universe. :)

I like your Shepard. I can see there is a lot of potential for evolution of her character, and (more importantly) that you intended that. I am wondering if you will give her a romance at some point? And if so, who with? Pretty much every game-related possibility is open so far, as well as a few that aren't, like Vega. (While on the subject: poor James. Shepard was weighing him like meat in a butcher shop for a bit there. At least he seemed oblivious to it. Could have gotten very awkward otherwise. lol)

I know the actual reaper invasion is likely a LONG ways off in this story, but I can't *wait* to see how bending plays in to it. At first I thought bending would give everyone who could do it a real advantage, but then I was surprised to see a husk firebend. So, now I have no idea which way it would go. All very interesting.

Looking very forward to future chapters. Hope we get to see more Avatar Hong. I liked him. :)
7/18/2012 c6 Guest
Another great chapter. I really like that you upload chapters so quickly and that they are long. I like that we get to see a glimpse of Earth and see more of the world building. I liked the bit of information we got about the First Contact War and I would like to know how Avatar Hong died. Did Saren kill him? I would like to see some of the Codex entries.
7/18/2012 c6 11OMAC001
I love this story. I think it is a good idea to do Codexes.
7/18/2012 c6 delta7
Another very good chapter. I liked the details we got about the First Contact War in this universe and I am left with the question of how did Avatar Hong die. Somehow I have the feeling that Saren was involved. I liked that we briefly got to see Earth and about the histories of the main characters. When you said that Rana was one of the Beifongs, is that a hint that she is an earthbender-biotic? I think you should go with the Codex, it would be good to get details on how the Avatar world has effected the galaxy that you couldn't insert in the main story. Please keep up the good work.
7/16/2012 c5 delta7
Another great chapter. Glad we got to see the past Avatar and learn some of the background of this universe. I hope that you will continue to update as quickly as you do. Hopefully you will be able to continue to the end of Mass Effect 3.
7/15/2012 c5 N3phtys
Sorry for not posting a review sooner (I read this the day you uploaded it, cant wait for any of you fics)

I really do like this crossover. It seems right. Also, you made Shepard even more badass than in canon.
But this chapter gave me 2 questions:
1) was Korra the last water bending avatar? (therefore making Shepard the first airbending avatar after Aang?) Couldn't really tell from the chapter (still, very fluff-y chapter, which does not feel that short)
2) will you include the new facts from the extended cut dlc? (also, the rumored Leviathan-DLC soon to be announced?) Ty made it seem like Reapers are not that souvereign as they would like... I even believe they are indoctrinated by the catalyst the same as their minions are by them. We didn't get much from Harbringer/Souvereign yet, but that might change. Any complications yet for you because of these DLC?
7/1/2012 c5 7Nerdman3000
Brilliant chapter, although I had been hoping it Aang or Korra would have showed up along with Hong. Also, will this story give spoilers to your 'Three Families' story.
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