Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Her Name in the Stillness

12/15/2021 c1 10pajamawolfie
You only mentioned two women apart from Clare, Miria, Helen, and Deneve... does this mean poor Yuma was forgotten again?
6/5/2012 c1 45shelter
As much as I want to empathise with Clare in this story, I felt she came across as quite self-absorbed, deliberately isolating herself. It's ironic, since there's so much focus in your story on the other people around her.

Also, note your spelling. It should be "cannot bear" and "temper down my grief."

What would've made this story perfect was a deeper understanding of WHY Clare's like this. You mention grief, Clare almost weeping and her disdain for "knowing each other for the sake of it" (which would probably be your best observation, and could be a story by itself), but Clare's sense of loss is not really there. At best, it gets confused with the events at Pieta. Clare's sense of sadness over Teresa will probably be obvious to most Claymore readers, but it would've been good if you had shown it.
5/21/2012 c1 6Ann E. Casap
You did a great job portraying Clare and her thoughts about Teresa, I liked this. My sympathies for your mother.

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service