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for Creating Atlantis

6/5/2015 c4 8Kyubbiman
What? No seriously what it goes from Emma lamenting over the fact that she's not married to Nate being suspicious, to them trying to figure out how to protect the island, then finding scrolls about Atlantis indicating that they needed to help raise Atlantis, then creating a convoluted and overly complicated plan involving scaring away people snooping around the island by dressing as weird spirits protecting the island. The writing is all over the place and the whole Atlantis is way too sudden with no foreshadowing whatsoever and their idea to keep people off the island is something a villain from an episode of Scooby-Doo to come up with. For them to consider it at all, let alone not come up with better more rational alternatives is so out of character. I will continue reading b/c the main plot looks as if it's about to kick off.
6/5/2015 c2 Kyubbiman
Okay I'm just gonna throw this out there I have mixed feelings about this story so far. This is a great story don't get me wrong but you glossed over some really major stuff. They tell they're parents about being Mermaids as well as getting Mermen boyfriends as well as the parents just simply following Zane's orders regarding their kids. To the first problem you did not elaborate at any length regarding their parent's reaction to this new knowledge or how they coped with it and adapted to this new life at all you just skipped a year ahead like it was no big deal. Nor did you cover the reactions concerning the boys becoming Mermen seriously those two things are really important concerning plot and character growth. Third the parents just followed Zane's orders regarding capturing the girls no argument there. And what about the changes in the girl's physiology no explanation. I won't start on the wedding b/c I can see Zane and Rikki doing something like that. The story isn't bad by any means and I enjoy stuff like this but with a lack of explanation regarding the revelation and reaction from they're families takes away from the story.
5/24/2015 c17 Whydhduendjdb89
Name: Charlottina (Carlotta)

Gender: Female

Tail color: Rainbow coloured. (Each scale a different colour)

Origin: Half mer, half man-fairy (see history below)

Power: Man-fairy powers

Age: 19

History: Her mother was a man-fairy. A man fairy is a type of fairy that is as large as a human and appears that way but can sprout wings at will and can do magic. Her father was a royal mer in the Bermuda triangle he is mixed breed. The Man-fairies and mer were sworn enemies. The man-fairies lived on an island near the waters where the mer lived. One day her father's niece was cursed by a man-fairy and was slowly dieing. Her father went onto a beach and dried off. Her mother the princess of the man-fairies saw him and should of reported him but she found she couldn't. She called out to him and he got scared but since he didn't yet have his legs he couldn't get back into the water. She asked him why he was here and he told her. She gave him the antidote and he went away. The next week he went back to see if she was there she was. They met at the same place every week. They fell in love. One day her father's brother followed him to the beach and saw him. He told his father and he blamed the man-fairies for putting him under a spell. They were going to start a war. What the two species didn't realize was that her father had asked her mother to marry him. They ran away together to new Zealand. They had her but when she was only 1 year old the two species found them and they were trying to bring them home. Before they did her mother left her at a sailors monument. She was found and put in an orphanage. When she was 8 she got her first tail. She kept it a secret. When she was 15 the orphanage went on a field trip to the seaside. She wandered too close to the edge of a cliff and it crumbled and fell. Instead of plummeting to her death like she should have wings sprouted from her shoulder blades and she flew onto a ledge on the cliff face. In this cave of the face was a small pool. She dived into it. That night there was a midnight sun which transformed her into a full mer. She could transform into a man-fairy at will and had a tail. When in mermaid form she has small wings which allow her to go faster under the water. Her eyes are a deep blue but the pupils are gold. They are the eyes of a man-fairy. When in fairy form her wings are butterfly like and are rainbow coloured and her skin glows. She has no mer powers but has man fairy powers which she tries to use to help people but they usually cause more trouble than they solve.

Sorry about doing a history! It's just that I needed to explain about the man-fairies and got a bit carried away. I know this story if very far along now but I hope you might be able to work her in! You've got a great story!
5/5/2015 c36 AReader
Is the story going to continue? If so please focus more on Rikkie, Emma, Zane, Cleo, Will, Ash, Lewis,and Bella because this started with them and they story is straying away from them. Great story though!
4/27/2015 c36 5WannabeeAussie
I'm so glad you updated! I just recently started reading this story and I love it.
4/27/2015 c36 Guest
Wow his was a amazing it's impressive that you can show such range of themes n your writtings style
1/30/2015 c5 Guest
OH MY GOD! It was fuckin' perfect!
12/18/2014 c35 Reader103
please please please please please please please update pleaseeee
11/25/2014 c35 KiwiSaladFace
Alright, I can see you have updated this recently so pleeeeaaassseee update this :) I really like it :D
10/8/2014 c35 Guest
it was amazing love it love you
10/7/2014 c35 xXKarouXx
You're back! You're back! :D Please update soon if you can!
10/6/2014 c35 4MickDunD
Wow...things are getting good! Can't wait for Ivan to make his move!
10/5/2014 c35 JAMX.oh4getit
Yay she's back great chapter
9/24/2014 c1 16LinkZelda4eva
9/1/2014 c34 Erodith Twigg
pls update sooon :) id really like to see more of this story
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