for A Day in the Life of Shiomiya Shiori8/6/2012 c1 
1Thyrokio
Well written and entertaining, this brief glimpse of Shiori's life was a joy to read. She was also one of my favorite characters of the manga, she's just too adorable.
1ThyrokioWell written and entertaining, this brief glimpse of Shiori's life was a joy to read. She was also one of my favorite characters of the manga, she's just too adorable.
6/12/2012 c1 Neapolite
...Awesome.
Your grammar is incredible, though I can't say that I know that much of grammar.
Impeccable characterization, too.
Looks like that I was on the mood for big words.
Well. What can I say. The story is amazing, and, personally, I wouldn't have minded if you made it with all of Shiori's thougths, and over 10.000 words.
It has been a while since I found quality writing from writers thst I'm not already following.
Hope to read more stories from you.
...Awesome.
Your grammar is incredible, though I can't say that I know that much of grammar.
Impeccable characterization, too.
Looks like that I was on the mood for big words.
Well. What can I say. The story is amazing, and, personally, I wouldn't have minded if you made it with all of Shiori's thougths, and over 10.000 words.
It has been a while since I found quality writing from writers thst I'm not already following.
Hope to read more stories from you.
6/10/2012 c1 21RanaTantei
Putting the long ANs aside, this story was a great one indeed. Your writing style had never failed to impress me, and even other writers.
Your Shiori is entertaining too. Especially with the story being told from her POV (somehow). Everything you did was perfect. The only problem is the lack of dialogues. But we're talking about Shiori here. Haha.
Great writing style plus great character development - awesome story.
Welcome to the KamiNomi fandom by the way.
P.S. Sorry for the late review
21RanaTanteiPutting the long ANs aside, this story was a great one indeed. Your writing style had never failed to impress me, and even other writers.
Your Shiori is entertaining too. Especially with the story being told from her POV (somehow). Everything you did was perfect. The only problem is the lack of dialogues. But we're talking about Shiori here. Haha.
Great writing style plus great character development - awesome story.
Welcome to the KamiNomi fandom by the way.
P.S. Sorry for the late review
6/9/2012 c1 19AKAAkira
I say I dislike this fic, if only for the reason that I was working on a Shiori-centric fic right now and compared to this one, the Shiori I wrote is inferior as well as overshadowed. -.-
But man, your narration's compelling. The greatest obstacle I find myself in is making the story entertaining in the parts that don't have dialogue in them, without resorting to dialogue. The high quality level you've kept it at here is, frankly, enviable.
Mh-hm, Shiori's brilliantly written. Her background details were thorough enough, and her thought processes were cleanly written. The only thing I could even come up to criticize was the relative lack of dialogue, and the very fact it's from Shiori's POV takes THAT ammo out big-time.
Overall, an excellent read.
19AKAAkiraI say I dislike this fic, if only for the reason that I was working on a Shiori-centric fic right now and compared to this one, the Shiori I wrote is inferior as well as overshadowed. -.-
But man, your narration's compelling. The greatest obstacle I find myself in is making the story entertaining in the parts that don't have dialogue in them, without resorting to dialogue. The high quality level you've kept it at here is, frankly, enviable.
Mh-hm, Shiori's brilliantly written. Her background details were thorough enough, and her thought processes were cleanly written. The only thing I could even come up to criticize was the relative lack of dialogue, and the very fact it's from Shiori's POV takes THAT ammo out big-time.
Overall, an excellent read.
6/8/2012 c1 3J.V. Hart
Personally I liked how this turned out. Despite how long the A/N are it did clear up a little bit of confusion during the fic. The fic itself shows that you put a great amount of effort to understand Shiori. Good job and good luck on your future stories!
3J.V. HartPersonally I liked how this turned out. Despite how long the A/N are it did clear up a little bit of confusion during the fic. The fic itself shows that you put a great amount of effort to understand Shiori. Good job and good luck on your future stories!
6/7/2012 c1 49Wrathie Winsre
I'll be first then.
I was quite intrigued by your AN's at the start and from the looks of things, you're a much better native speaker than I am in English and so I congratulate you for taking time to write a one shot like that.
Well, tbh, it's rare to have good writers here, so I welcome you to the fandom! Glad that you joined us with this excellent piece.
Honestly, it was a little long for me, but thankfully due to the new format and story view, it was bearable.
I see that a huge chunk of your story is dedicated to the AN's and footnotes, which i found to be.. well, unique? but tl;dr, if you have to ask me honestly.
Still, I like the effort you put in and even though i didn't read the footnotes, I can tell that you're putting an effort into Shiori's character and her using references is spot on.
I like how you included monologues that fitted well into Shiori's shoes, much better than I can do anyway and is a very canonically depiction of Shiori's inner mindset and inner world.
I can't say much about it as it is a brillant work for a one shot and I hope you write more, even if I may not see all of your works.
A very delightful read,
Thank you for the addition to the fandom
-regards
wrathie
49Wrathie WinsreI'll be first then.
I was quite intrigued by your AN's at the start and from the looks of things, you're a much better native speaker than I am in English and so I congratulate you for taking time to write a one shot like that.
Well, tbh, it's rare to have good writers here, so I welcome you to the fandom! Glad that you joined us with this excellent piece.
Honestly, it was a little long for me, but thankfully due to the new format and story view, it was bearable.
I see that a huge chunk of your story is dedicated to the AN's and footnotes, which i found to be.. well, unique? but tl;dr, if you have to ask me honestly.
Still, I like the effort you put in and even though i didn't read the footnotes, I can tell that you're putting an effort into Shiori's character and her using references is spot on.
I like how you included monologues that fitted well into Shiori's shoes, much better than I can do anyway and is a very canonically depiction of Shiori's inner mindset and inner world.
I can't say much about it as it is a brillant work for a one shot and I hope you write more, even if I may not see all of your works.
A very delightful read,
Thank you for the addition to the fandom
-regards
wrathie