for Hey There, Oblivious11/4/2014 c1 
5thingsthatmakeme
So sweet! Very endearing :) the 'i love you' at the end was a bit rushed, but other than that, it was very cute!
5thingsthatmakemeSo sweet! Very endearing :) the 'i love you' at the end was a bit rushed, but other than that, it was very cute!
6/20/2013 c1 26Fi Suki Saki
The words that only came out for this fic while laughing:
"Poor Tony..." XDD
26Fi Suki SakiThe words that only came out for this fic while laughing:
"Poor Tony..." XDD
9/3/2012 c1 let's kill tonite
You don't give yourself enough credit! It was all VERY good, and i can't think of anything that was grammatically wrong, and I definitely can't think of anything wrong with the story! Your a really good writer, so don't be too hard on yourself! I know that I can't be the only reader who thought that was brilliant!
You don't give yourself enough credit! It was all VERY good, and i can't think of anything that was grammatically wrong, and I definitely can't think of anything wrong with the story! Your a really good writer, so don't be too hard on yourself! I know that I can't be the only reader who thought that was brilliant!
7/31/2012 c1 IAmAStonyFan
'What, had pick up lines not been envented in the forties?' Lol I love that
'What, had pick up lines not been envented in the forties?' Lol I love that
7/2/2012 c1 4SweetSalty
Ohmigod. This is so cute it should be giving me cavities. I think my favourites were the first and the last one. And I was pleased to find that there were no spelling or grammar errors that I could find. Good job! this is going into my favourites.
4SweetSaltyOhmigod. This is so cute it should be giving me cavities. I think my favourites were the first and the last one. And I was pleased to find that there were no spelling or grammar errors that I could find. Good job! this is going into my favourites.
6/19/2012 c1 5TheSwanWriter
Red Bull is now my friend...
Haha, poor Tony and his awkward messed-up pick up lines. Steve's always annoyingly oblivious like that, isn't he?
5TheSwanWriterRed Bull is now my friend...
Haha, poor Tony and his awkward messed-up pick up lines. Steve's always annoyingly oblivious like that, isn't he?
6/18/2012 c1 16Ni-chan9
Wow. This was great :D Like, I seriously love this. Better than what I expected. Gosh, Stony is totally winning me over recently _ Ah, to hell with it. I SHIP THIS!
"I know you're drunk, but are you alright?"
"I'm fine… You're just so beautiful I forgot my line."
Omg, YES. Tony is one smart man. Cap is gorgeous!
This wasn't bad at all. Especially considering you were running off of red bull at 3:30 AM. lol
Honestly, I don't think anything major is off 'cause, like I said, this story was great, but just for improvement a bit more description would be nice. Like here:
Tony knew he had finally won Steve over when he heard the moan that came out of the back of the blond's throat.
"Whoa… I, uh… I guess I lost, huh?"
Steve placed another kiss on Tony's lips, wrapping his arms around the billionaire.
Telling that Tony pulled away & then spoke or describing how Cap looked at him before leaning in for another kiss would've been nice descriptions. Its like putting yourself in each characters shoes, you know? But yeah, this isn't NEEDED since some authors prefer less description & some more. It all depends on your style of writing. Just figure out which one suits you :) Oh, the characterizations & everything were great too! Love this!
16Ni-chan9Wow. This was great :D Like, I seriously love this. Better than what I expected. Gosh, Stony is totally winning me over recently _ Ah, to hell with it. I SHIP THIS!
"I know you're drunk, but are you alright?"
"I'm fine… You're just so beautiful I forgot my line."
Omg, YES. Tony is one smart man. Cap is gorgeous!
This wasn't bad at all. Especially considering you were running off of red bull at 3:30 AM. lol
Honestly, I don't think anything major is off 'cause, like I said, this story was great, but just for improvement a bit more description would be nice. Like here:
Tony knew he had finally won Steve over when he heard the moan that came out of the back of the blond's throat.
"Whoa… I, uh… I guess I lost, huh?"
Steve placed another kiss on Tony's lips, wrapping his arms around the billionaire.
Telling that Tony pulled away & then spoke or describing how Cap looked at him before leaning in for another kiss would've been nice descriptions. Its like putting yourself in each characters shoes, you know? But yeah, this isn't NEEDED since some authors prefer less description & some more. It all depends on your style of writing. Just figure out which one suits you :) Oh, the characterizations & everything were great too! Love this!
6/16/2012 c1 22ibelieveinahappilyeverafter
Sounds like Tony, only he lives off of coffee, that probably has mold in it where he leaves it sitting there for so long. XD Hence the creation of Dummy! XD Sorry, I've been reading Avenger's fanfics for...uh...days. I stay up till 4-5AM then sleep till past noon...so I'm not too normal right now. XD
I had to stop reading at points, because it was just so crack-filled and funny! I don't know why, but I can never read a pick-up line fic without stopping and laughing to myself for close to five minutes...it's just one of those laugh buttons, you know, how there' always /something/ to make you laugh. XD
Well, good fic! Certainly made me laugh! And I know what you mean about fics you'll never write...that's what I said about songfics...that failed... I now have trouble /not/ writing them. XD
22ibelieveinahappilyeverafterSounds like Tony, only he lives off of coffee, that probably has mold in it where he leaves it sitting there for so long. XD Hence the creation of Dummy! XD Sorry, I've been reading Avenger's fanfics for...uh...days. I stay up till 4-5AM then sleep till past noon...so I'm not too normal right now. XD
I had to stop reading at points, because it was just so crack-filled and funny! I don't know why, but I can never read a pick-up line fic without stopping and laughing to myself for close to five minutes...it's just one of those laugh buttons, you know, how there' always /something/ to make you laugh. XD
Well, good fic! Certainly made me laugh! And I know what you mean about fics you'll never write...that's what I said about songfics...that failed... I now have trouble /not/ writing them. XD
6/16/2012 c1 Le fabulous woman
That was absolutely the most horrid amount of feels I've ever had! SO FREAKING ADORBS! I literally died.
That was absolutely the most horrid amount of feels I've ever had! SO FREAKING ADORBS! I literally died.
6/16/2012 c1 SpeakWithAction
What? HOW DARE NO ONE REVIEW YET!
This was adorable! I was having a pretty bad day and this made it better :D
Steveyou'readorablewhenyou'recluelesslol.
What? HOW DARE NO ONE REVIEW YET!
This was adorable! I was having a pretty bad day and this made it better :D
Steveyou'readorablewhenyou'recluelesslol.