
1/4/2013 c1
9PPVV
Hi there!
I read through your work and noticed a few typos. For example...why are there capital letters interspersed between sentences?
Read: "So The man who is a father, but doesn't feel fit to be one, leaves his son without saying goodbye. Just like Those years ago."
I liked the raw emotion that you conveyed here - the tired, ageless feeling of Hohenheim versus Ed's angry, bitter feelings that no boy his age should have to go through.
I agree with you in that Ed really cares for his father deep down. I think he just wants a big hug from him! The poor kid just wanted his father to show that he loved him.
Thanks for writing,
-P.P.V.V.

Hi there!
I read through your work and noticed a few typos. For example...why are there capital letters interspersed between sentences?
Read: "So The man who is a father, but doesn't feel fit to be one, leaves his son without saying goodbye. Just like Those years ago."
I liked the raw emotion that you conveyed here - the tired, ageless feeling of Hohenheim versus Ed's angry, bitter feelings that no boy his age should have to go through.
I agree with you in that Ed really cares for his father deep down. I think he just wants a big hug from him! The poor kid just wanted his father to show that he loved him.
Thanks for writing,
-P.P.V.V.