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for The Day I Died

11/10/2012 c3 3Nyx'sReincarnation
I love the story so far! It's so interesting, I've never read anything like it! The only thing is with paragraphs and dialogue. Only one person should speak per paragraph, no matter how short that makes it.
I hope you continue it!
Keep up the amazing work! :) (:
Tarah xXx
8/7/2012 c2 fictionlover6060
I think the story is interesting and original. The only criticism I have is that I think you are missing articles in places (an/the) and might be writing in instead of on. I don't know if it's just me though.
8/6/2012 c3 1A Midnight Song
Whoa that was totally unexpected. I think you could have written a multi chapter fiction with Bella and Edward's POV as well.
8/6/2012 c1 A Midnight Song
Do you have a special feeling for Jessica? It was different though...
8/2/2012 c1 72abbyli
Are you an Edward and Bella fan? It's interesting that you did it like this with Edward and Jessica...hmm...

By the way, got a Twilight story up too. It's Edward/OC where Bella is killed by James in Book 1 and the Cullens leave Forks and go to Alaska. Edward meets a young woman named Alexis who is the exact opposite of Bella. If you are interested, would love the uptake! It's called "an angel's song".
7/30/2012 c3 Nocturne
I just spotted some little things, I think I should write about them.
Firstly you have used some lines to describe Edward-Jessica's night together, most probably they are from a poem. They are very beautifully chosen... But if they are from a poem then you should have mentioned the author's name in your disclaimer/author's note.
Secondly there's an Erica in the second chapter and Angela in the first. You should check it once as it seemed to me that they are the same people. It was a very little thing of course.
The rest was good. You wrote it well. Well done.
7/30/2012 c1 Nocturne
It was a good one. Glad that you tried something different. You should have mentioned what Edward was dressed like because that way it would be easier to imagine the scene.

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