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6/27/2014 c1 19ONNMT has moved
Sensational.

It was thrilling and heart-wrenching, emotional yet psychotic. I've heard about the Jar of Wishes, but the way you used it as a muse was done phenomenally well. It's so light and sweet to begin with, but then it turns darker and more tragic... I love it. I truly, honestly, genuinely adore that well-paced downward-spiral that was done /SO WELL/.

The way Mary lost her innocent and sanity was breath-taking, and I can only honestly think of only one way that this could be improved - as a reader, I felt like that very last line was a bit abrupt and that it killed the flow a bit. I don't know whether that was intended, but personally I would have drawn it out a little longer (Place "Mary [blinked slowly, confusion settling over her hazy mind as her thoughts began to clear. She] stared at the ground; the broken glass . . ." on a new line, and then have a few sentences describe how her eyes widen and how her breath hitches as the realisation and reality of what had just transpired collapses on her - and /then/ she falls down).

Regardless, this is by far one of my favourite Ib fanfictions.

Thank you.

-ONNMT
9/9/2012 c1 tsukisan96
Poor Ib and Garry... and above that, POOR MARY! All she wanted was to see Guertena again and be happy :( When somebody finally came in her world she became jealous of Ib and ended up killing both her visitors... AGHH I FEEL SO BAD FOR HER TT TT
8/24/2012 c1 3DaniTheRedDragon
...
8/20/2012 c1 Yukai yami
ALL THE FEELS! :'(
I'll have to remember to fave this when I log in. It's really good!
8/19/2012 c1 7Dr. Stilla Live
Aww...Mary... ;n;

Sometimes I wish she had a happy ending too. She looked really sad when she was looking for Ib and Garry in the sketchbook world.

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