Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Ambitious

7/30/2014 c11 DeceasedKid
Ohhh I've been waiting for this, nice how you changed it up chef. Don't worry Dart, we're with you the whole way!
7/30/2014 c11 ClausMix
NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOO! Why chef whyyyyyy? O & No corp. More like O no you didn't! Ahh what happens next?

Really quick but theres a typo towards the beginning, other than that perfection!

And good thing, yaaay new character! Ashe seems cool ;)))
7/23/2014 c10 HeartPoppyDuck
BOOM BOOM POW POW! The perfect couple is so perfect together, Dart and Pandora just kiss already ahhhhhhh! They've been through everything together, everythinggg! This chapter was way different by the way, wasn't expecting the whole city WHOA theme. All is good, this was amazing! DeceasedKid told me you messaged him another part 3 chapter called Bullet Between the Eyes... AHHHHH I WISH I HAD A FANFICTION FILE! PLEASE UPDATE THAT HERE PLEASEEEEEEEEEE! DX HE SAID THERE WAS A LOT OF DARTxPANDORA, PIRIDI, AND PERSEPHONExOC! UPDATE THAT HERE! IM BEGGING YOUUUUU!
7/23/2014 c10 ClausMix
It's so different! Ah such a big adventure! This was an amazing chapter and I can't wait to read moarrrr! And hahaha for the names you come up with. Though it's serious, you still put in those funny moments to bring everything together!
7/21/2014 c10 DeceasedKid
Man I wish you named all the products in the world XD I'd love some CoffeeHype and definitely some Twerkies XDDD man oh man cheft I love this chapter, tad bit too much explaining but it really put a picture in my head. Update when you can, I know its gonna be great!
7/21/2014 c10 Soulthy
Where've you been cheft? Forever is forever and you haven't been updating in FOREVER. And I'm forever sad and still a little hungry. Though I really liked this chapter, I'm into the whole city gun action atmosphere and stuff. Great job. Now I really can't wait for you to get to Part 3 in Stunned, that means get working. Like now. Haha still the best Cheft.
6/7/2014 c9 HeartPoppyDuck
Hmm... Clarity sounds a lot like Claire's Xd or am I just going crazy? Anyways Dart is so weird, "I don't hate it." Blahhh. I can't believe they had another fiiiiiight, but don't worry they secretly love each other. heheheheheh. Oh and I nearly cried when they Dart gave the bracelet and they did a totally-not-awkward-holding-hands-thing. BUT OMG THAT ENDING! WHAT'S UP WITH PANDAAAAAAAAAAA?
5/28/2014 c3 6FunshineXD
Whoa, I really like that scene with the teacher and Dart taking the slap. Haha, it is kinda funny, when you mention it :P You are really good at painting scenes with a few words. That paragraph about the dreams at the beginning really made me think about his living place. That one paragraph leads to so many implications about his life, that I can't help but read on to find out WHY! You, my friend, have talent :) You also portray Pandora really well. I think she's becoming on of my favourite characters too! You make her seem rude and mischievous, but secrety kind and mysterious. And yes, the start of a new friendship between Dart and Panda :3
5/28/2014 c1 FunshineXD
My gosh FtAaIiRlY this is amazing! I never thought you could make this story better, but you've proven yourself. I feel super bad for not helping more recently! This is amazing! I can't wait to read the next chapter, so this review will be a little on the short side. I'll leave a longer one next time :)
5/27/2014 c1 Guest
That intro doe. You changed this story a lot
5/27/2014 c9 alcamoth
Awesome story here! Although I do wonder, would black coffee flavored ice cream with dark chocolate chips taste good? I'll go try it out next time I go to the ice cream shop. :P
5/26/2014 c7 HeartPoppyDuck
YOU UPDATED YAAAAAS! Surprized DartxPandora are just so perfect, I ship them so much! This story genre says romance so the two should just confess already! Ahhhhh I can't wait for the later chapters! I'm totally fine with no M rated stuff, too much is gross. I'm looking for cute scenes! AND OMG IN THIS CHAPTER DART AND PANDORA WERE ON THE SAME BED?! SAY WUUUUUT?! I also noticed in this chapter that Dart is totally in LOOOOVEEEE with Pandora, it's just that SHE keeps ignoring HIS FEELINGS! Whhhhhyyyy, Cheft tell me why! In the morning, Dart wanted to hug her, but was rejecteddddddd! The second time when the two fought the potrockets! WHHHHHHHY DX! maaaan Pandora's so cruel. During their breakfast, Dart spoke instantly when she got the letter to go outside or something, ahhhhhh! Sooo speaking of couples, the Piridi you planned sounds so interesting! I can just imagine a badass Pit beating up thugs for Viridi! JUST LIKE A KNIGHT AND PRINCESS! NO WAY, ADVENTURES TOGETHER REFRENCE!
5/26/2014 c8 Soulthy
Ah forgot to review. Well here I am now, aaaaaaand all Ihave to say is moar.
5/26/2014 c8 ClausMix
"Got it demon child?"

"Got it emo kid."

Awww they so cute! Dart and Pandora on a little date, awww- until that random group of guys showed up of nowhere and annoyed Pandora. Booooo! But anyways nice chapter :D keep up the good work!
5/26/2014 c7 Soulthy
Finally a chapter Cheft. Was getting worried back there, good thing you updated twice. And yes, I read all of the original. Crazy how you're changing up the storyline, it's going to be a looooong story. Keep on writing k.
162 « Prev Page 1 2 3 4 5 .. Last Next »

Desktop Mode . Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service