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for Dawn

12/5/2013 c21 hukomuyo
I find it very sad that you ended it like this, but well I can understand when you lose interest there's not much one can do about it.
12/5/2013 c21 CommanderSP
i would have loved more chief/cortana scenes.
12/5/2013 c15 CommanderSP
i'm sorry, but i wish this story had more chief/cortana interactions. :(
6/15/2013 c19 9Space-Dweeb
Wow...Asher seems like he really needs to get beaten down by a SPARTAN, because he's being really cocky right now. Hm. I'll watch for the next chapter.
4/30/2013 c18 Space-Dweeb
Hm...I'm sorry to point this out, but in The Fall of Reach, it was reported that only three SPARTANs were too far out of UNSC lines to get back for the Reach battle(which was not technically going to be the Reach battle, but meh). If memory serves, those SPARTANs were confirmed to be Gray Team. Even with the exception of Fireteam Black, the numbers simply do not add up for Keiichi being able to survive. Other than that, great chapter!
4/9/2013 c17 123238r
Lets Be honest here, you and I both know i'm the last person you should be taking writing advice from (you know why). But, i'm gonna' give it to you anyway :). Great job, one thing: unless you allready planned on doing this, explain how Red-1 and Red-2 and the spirit of fire got above the planet, and why it was infected with flood.
4/9/2013 c17 9Space-Dweeb
Um...woah. Did Fred just die? And where was the transition between Alice falling and Tom killing scientists? I fyou could clear that up a bit, it'd be great.
4/9/2013 c17 10Just a Crazy-Man
Epic read!
4/5/2013 c16 9Space-Dweeb
Hm...what? You're killing a lot of characters that would probably not die in canon. Just saying. How many more chapters will there be with this story?
4/5/2013 c16 10Just a Crazy-Man
Love it!
3/25/2013 c8 TheSilenceIsVast
Kurt Ambrose?
3/25/2013 c15 dukas
I do have some trouble, but i get the general plot to it
3/20/2013 c15 44firerwolf
I am very confused as to what is happening. There is a large gap in information and it really left me in the dark like 4 chapters ago. I was sort of hoping I'd pick the plot back up but I still haven't.
3/20/2013 c15 Guest
Yes i honestly dont understand this story how did the innies get flood spores when they have all been destroyed?
3/18/2013 c15 9Space-Dweeb
I'm getting really confused here...what happened to the other SPARTANs? How do their timelines correspond? How do the SPARTANs and Asher keep moving so quickly? I would recommend putting a lot more detail in your chapters.
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