Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Wolf of the Fellowship

3/15/2019 c4 SarahDelves
AMAZING... PLEASE CARRY ON
3/15/2019 c2 Guest
It's MERRY!
12/2/2018 c4 Duckers
Really great- please update!
3/27/2013 c4 1Amber Silverwood
Update!
3/1/2013 c4 9snowyclara
Awesome, another chapter!

I love the backstory, it makes your characters more defined if that makes sense. Now, there's a reason for everything and puts more light on the morals of your created race.

However, with the good comes the bad.

I'll admit that I was a little intimidated when it came to read the backstory, it's one big block of text, and I'm an avid reader. I noticed that there were parts when Keida wasn't talking, so if you space it out more, not only will there be more clarity, it won't look as scary.

There were also little places where punctuation was missing, for example, "Keida finished" There's supposed to be a period.

I'm still loving this story, and I hope you take my criticism well. You did last time. (Thank you for that by the way, it was nice to not get yelled at through a PM)

Expectantly waiting for the next chapter, snowyclara
2/8/2013 c3 LILEVILONE96
cant wait to see what you do with this story! please update soon!
1/21/2013 c4 Horsevcrazy
love the wolf idea as the 10th walker and love the strong girl character keep it up!
1/21/2013 c4 Guest
I thought it was an awesome chapter. I can totally understand their dilemma,if instead of watching your family, friends and children be slaughtered, you must fight for someone you hate and with no other solution in sight, there would be no choice but to surrender until there was another way out.
Good Job.
1/21/2013 c4 EGilly
This is really good! Could you make longer chapters? Update! :)
1/21/2013 c4 CalathielKat
Yay you updated! I always imagine Ziva's facial expressions now whenever you write it :D please hurry with the next chapter, I can't wait to see how her meeting the other members of the fellowship goes!
1/21/2013 c4 Bluu6293
AAAAAAAAAAAAA You must update! I love this story! Her atitude is amazing and bold, love the character depth and how well you describe her.
1/21/2013 c4 8Ortholeine
I thought it was very well done, and I like the plot and whole explanation on the wolves. I can't wait until she has to confront the rest of the fellowship and I am wondering what will happen for Legolas and her to have a relationship...
1/21/2013 c4 7SilverSteamWolf
And thus later chapters have brought improvement. I hadn't read them earlier. But this is much better than the first. Well done.
I'm just going to pick on one thing though (because I'm mean like that xD jk): there was a lot of word repetition. I'll encourage you to get out a thesaurus or look one up on google and find words that are different but have the same meaning. It really does a lot for a piece of writing.
:)
1/21/2013 c1 SilverSteamWolf
One or two tips to improve: try to keep to one tense. I noticed you slipped in and out of past tense to present tense in the first few paragraphs. Remember to capitalise names and places. And see if you can use a variety of adjectives - people like to be intruiged by interesting words. Also, instead of telling us what the characters look like with bold words in brackets, try describing them using similes and metaphors. For example: "her fur was black like coal," or "his eyes were grey storm clouds hovering around brown mountain peaks."

Aside from those few things, this wasn't half bad for a first chapter of your very first fic. I like the idea and hope you keep it up and take on board the critique of others. :)
1/21/2013 c4 3Narnia and Harry Potter 4 EVER
Yay! Aragon belives her i was wondering why they had pushed their pack out...
39 Page 1 .. Last Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service