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for Rio and Halo:Wars

8/7/2014 c1 Halofan500
I honestly think this story needs to be revised.
To the author and any other novice writers, here are a few tips on how be successful.
1. GRAMMAR. I can't stress this enough. For a story to be a success, people who look at the words need to be able to understand the plot and scenes.
2. SPACING. Try and separate different scenes. Do not put a space between every single line.
. This is important for speech and emotion. Those two aspects are what bring characters to life. Otherwise they are boring and mindless. "Speech uses these symbols at both ends of dialogue." L
4. BETA READERS

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