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for Sonic the Hedgehog and the Potion of DOOOOOOM!

6/20/2013 c1 Meta Write
Cool! Do you know the kirby games/Anime? If so, can u make a remake, basically with Meta as sonic was in this situation?
6/12/2013 c1 2Princess Flare the Fox
All of the parts with just Tails and Knuckles. It was hilarious!

Scourge: *Snorts* I wanted Blue to stay like that. He was actually funny with the help of that potion.

5/11/2013 c1 93Lordoftheghostking28
Holy crap. I nearly died laughing at this.
I love your random little comments thrown everywhere.
4/18/2013 c1 Tide0
"That's why you don't do drugs kiddies" LOL. And yes, I think that this is a crack story.
1/16/2013 c1 14Gnat1
LOL, excellent lil' crackfic you made here! The best part ever was when Knuckles had to embarrass himself with Knuxouge advertising XD
1/13/2013 c1 11WolfPaladin
Sheogorath just got competition...I think.
1/13/2013 c1 4PuppyPaw
I agree with Lord Kelvin.

This is a story, not a script. Don't talk about camera pans, or this could get mistaken for a script story, which is a reportable offense.
1/12/2013 c1 19Lord Kelvin
The script drags.

Don't expect readers to digest a million lame one-liners. The chapter outstays its welcome without much substance in those lines.

Solution 1: shorten the chapter without improving your writing.

Solution 2: dump the stuff you copied off the TV and leave the original parts. No laughs lost.

Oh, and it might look neater if you stop using online roleplay asterisks for action and narrate properly. The rant on the bottom of the chapter shows you can narrate. Why do you put the most advanced paragraphs outside the story? That's unintuitive.

You can write a crackfic without descending to fart jokes. But you'd need a different start to accomplish that.

Have a nice, abuse-free day.
1/11/2013 c1 2jakeroo123
And then...

Mario shows up. Mario's all blue and watery, but claims it's because he's sick. He hears about the love potion, and asks for some. Amy can't see any harm from giving him some, and some so. Immediately, he transforms into Bowser Jr. and runs off screaming for his dad about "WE'VE WON! WE'VE WON!"
1/11/2013 c1 7gamerprincess13
God, that was a really funny story to laugh at, I can't tell which parts are funny. They were all amazing!

Not sure if this story is crack though... Oh well! Who cares! I loved reading it and that's what matters!

Hope to read more of your fanfics in the future!

-gamerprincess13 ;D
1/11/2013 c1 19Poetic Gamer
This was funny
I loved it!_
1/11/2013 c1 Cookies
I dunno what was the funniest moment, because it was all so funny!

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