Just In
for Unmapped Temperament

8/22/2013 c6 PaC
For a good while I was getting pretty pissed(USA def.) with this chapter as Harry was getting pissed(UK def.).
This was because the whole crazy IN THE DARK stuff of wtf the triads are doing what they are doing is bad enough. If the story is going to limit the reader to being even with Harry's POV of not knowing wtf is going on, so be it.
But then there there were the huge jump[S] [line breaks? missing] and Harry knows what is going on, unless he was just going on drinking binges, but the bloody damn reader doesn't(frustrating!), UNTIL FINALLY we get brought back up to speed with what Harry and his "drinking buddy" have been up to, other than getting drunk and getting beaten up.
Don't know if it was an experiment of the author's, but there are enough UNKNOWNS going on, that this gag of blindfolding the readers to not know wtf Harry and his accomplice were doing, was pretty frustrating, irking this reader out the wazoo, until Harry brings the reader up to speed about the "coin switch purpose, the magic ear bit" and begins to transcribe the conversations.

The voldy remark at the end of this chapter only adds to this readers wonder, of Why the fuck the blood thirsty triad guy in charge of the U.K. ops, isn't "fired", made dead in a painful way, and replaced? I mean, shit, if all you want to do is to kidnap someone, a more cunning, covert and less "WWIII" plan makes more sense. Plus it seems pretty freaking risky that Harry had an excellent chance of being killed rather than kidnapped IF the triad goal isn't to just murder Harry. And if the plan is a to kidnap him and have his cooperation, good freaking luck with that when you're killing all his friends and allies.
The Wei guy [if I'm even able to be recalling who was "in charge" of the ops in the U.K. to "get" Harry] truly reminds me of the common fanfic Voldy, applying crucio after crucio to his minions for their failures when he should be crucio-ing himself for HIS FAILURES. Unlike Voldy, the triad guy in charge of the U.K. ops is obviously somewhat of an "underling", even if an upper level underling of some sort, and I can't but wonder WHY his disappointed superiors who from time to time speak of the big fucking mess he's made, how they[the triads] will be exposed [[HEY, good, let's get the triads exposed and Fudge and Scrimgour hoisted up by their own petards. Might be nice to give Harry at least some satisfaction of that, perhaps the whole mess and murders Harry is accused of blowing to bits as the triads involvement is somehow made public...maybe this happening while Harry is "closing in" on the triads and figuring out wtf is the reason for them seeming to be trying to kill him]] I mean, the bit of Harry STEALING chinese secret magic and getting the entire U.K. in trouble with the Chinese and their super-magic shit is just so DUMB for someone to believe, even for dumb-Fudge and Scrimgour to believe. How Scrimgour expects to stir all the shit and not stink and blame it all on Fudge in order for himself to become MoM is beyond me understanding how that's possible. You'd think any shit hitting the fan would blow up in both their faces.

? "Adventure/Romance" ?
So far it's more like "thriller/mystery and frustrating wtf is going on fanfic?"
The writing is good, but this readers patience has often been running out with the frustration of so little tiny drip by drip little pieces of the plot puzzle being so few and so far in-between that the reader is likely to not keep track of them all if they didn't take notes and begin assembling the "clues" for puzzling together the wtf pieces for wtf is going on with the triad crap.

Well, we're in France, guess the Delacours might be onstage soon? Or not. Or maybe the triads will kill everyone but Fleur, since she's listed as the pairing?
8/20/2013 c1 matrim cuthon
an exciting start
8/18/2013 c6 lou2003us
I really want to see what happens next!

Looking forward to next chapter!

Keep up the great work.
8/18/2013 c1 30CK
Holy hell, talk about a way to start a story. This may well be the most adrenaline-filled, topsy-turvy, holy-shit first chapter out of any other fanfiction I might care to rattle off of the top of my head. I have no idea where this is going, but I'm really looking forward to reading all of what you've got up so far.
8/18/2013 c6 4stonerkenobi7
I'm going to give this story a shot. My few complaints are at how you are trying to be clever in withholding the reason for the triad wanting Harry and the traitor in the order. It is more annoying than clever, but I will stick with this for a little while longer to see if it is worth it.
8/17/2013 c2 McFallen101
" In the darkest times we find out what we're made of."
8/17/2013 c1 McFallen101
Bloody Brilliant
8/17/2013 c6 WhatIsTheMeaningOfLife
Great update, really enjoyed the story so far. Can't wait to find out why the triads are after harry... though I'm guessing it has something to do with triads getting rid of voldemort using harry since they don't want to kill him... anyways looking forward to more... and will we find out what happened to tonks in the next chapter?
8/17/2013 c6 John Doe
That plot twist!

G'job and update soon!
8/17/2013 c6 Naginator
Hope we find out what they want with harry soon
8/16/2013 c6 Lightsbane1905
What do they want with him?
8/16/2013 c6 axl88x
This story is amazing, but god damn, it is chilling. Great writing!
8/14/2013 c5 sjstaudt
Great story. Love the gritty realism and the lack of Harry worship (he's been through so much oh the poor boy) that I usually see and putting him in a situation that requires him to rely on himself. I also like the deaths of the Grangers and Weasleys although not so much Fred and George. There's only so much to be done with Ron Ginny and Hermione and most of it has been. Looking forward to an update soon.
8/6/2013 c5 Lightsbane1905
Damn that was a cliffie for the ages, love more
8/4/2013 c3 32Tellemicus Sundance
Though I'm sure you've got your reasons, I recommend you change the title. It doesn't seem to fit with the general theme you've been establishing here. Just some food for thought.
128 « Prev Page 1 .. 2 3 4 5 6 .. Last Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service