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5/5 c92 RealCoolDude
Duncan hits hard at home. Blue's problem here is exactly what I'm working on fixing, too. the confirmation helps, as do other viewpoints, even if fictional, so thanks.
5/1 c92 KEB
Fantastic chapter! I'm glad Blue will be learning to lose. He keeps improving, which is necessary, for everyone really, but he seems to be getting into a bad mindset. Losing will help, I think.
5/3 c66 1CMY187
“the hospital going through its final immolation”
I wonder what Surge thinks and feels about Jack’s decision. How many people died when the hospital collapsed?
“the onix that was cracking streets and building foundations”
Even onix and steelix flee before Zapdos…I’m guessing that being dual Ground-type would not protect them from Zapdos’ lightning.
“someone in deep shock”
Red later goes over what happened a hundred times in his head, and decides that had he followed Aiko, he would definitely have died along with her.
“denial and horror”
Hmm. Interesting. It seems that Sabra had some sort of inkling that Jack WOULD do something downright suicidal, but chose not to believe it.
“Their pokemon survived, for a bit”

“it’s as its Second”
I thought of Colonel Hal Moore having the NCOs in his battalion be trained and taught to carry out the tasks that are usually given to officers.
“She was a hero”
Be very careful of how you use that term, Sabra.
“Blue will be proud of her”
And Red disagrees with Blue on this. He does not want other people to follow in Aiko’s footsteps.
“she pulls him into a hug”
She has experience in treating people who are in shock.
“if she loses the ability to connect with people”
I thought of Sharpe’s Rifles, the first episode of the Sharpe series.
“the survivor’s guilt he carried”
Rust Cohle: ‘People incapable of feeling guilt do tend to have a good time.’
“neither of them look back as another part of the building caves in”
Ultimately, Aiko is just one of hundreds of people who perished in Vermillion City. But to the people who met, knew and grew close to her, her death is more than just a statistic.
5/2 c92 4Parselmaster
That's not tactful at all. But hey, there must be some tolerance to it.
5/1 c65 1CMY187
“Deep as her bones, like a weight on her very skin”
The Fight-or-Flight instinct. A biological development as old as life itself.
Is there anything that the Stormbringers fear?
“when she saw a myth float above her in rainbow blaze of heat”
Ho-oh. Unlike the Stormbringers, that Legendary pokemon is one that apparently is very rarely seen.
“The only thing that kept her upright and moving as sheer fear of social condemnation”
I thought of a certain moment in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011); being more afraid of being impolite/rude than for one’s own life.
“she couldn’t even open her mouth to give commands”
Pressure is a terrible thing. And it gets worse the more a person is exposed to it. Worser still, it stacks; the effects don’t completely go away once you are out of range.
“wasn’t enough to dispel that relief”
This may have contributed to her fatal decision to enter the collapsing building.
“ashamed of how useless she was”
What actions would she have taken in Viridian Forest?
“she’s going to end up joining the gym too”

“Raticate, venonat, sandslash, oddish, krabby”
How many of her pokemon perished with her in Vermillion?
“She hasn’t trained it for combat yet”
I love that Blue has so much difficulty training his abra and ghastly. Does Giovanni also struggle with training such pokemon?
“medical, navigation, rescue and kiting”
Now I’m curious about the education systems and academies of this world.
“any with a healthy fear of fire”
I’m guessing that fire-type pokemon are more-or-less impervious to flames and extremely resistant to heat.
“if I could sacrifice one of each of our pokemon to get there now”
(looks at Natural) …
“Jack’s machoke shatters the door”
I hate fighting-type pokemon now…
“electricity arcs out from them into the various magnemite and magneton”
Imagine running and operating a power plant in this world…
“If it’s not, there’s something worse”
I shuddered at this.
“it’s not a bad idea. We’ll be sure to include it in the debrief”
When Zapdos came within proximity of the city, communications were the first thing to break down.
“through the streets or into buildings”
I wonder what happens when friendly or neutral wild pokemon wander into places such as shopping malls or schools. (looks at wild meowth) Huh.
“That kiss seemed to take everyone by surprise”
“and occasionally up”
(looks at the Ground-type specialist Giovanni) Of all the pokemon types out there, that is the one that he specializes in. And according to Blue, he does not have an ‘ace’ pokemon.
“Hard to tell, really”
I suspect that Elaine is lying here.
“the calm he feels while he’s in a battle”
Adventures-Giovanni: ‘Destroy the opponent’s footing.’
Seriously, Giovanni in the Adventures manga. That guy doesn’t fight fair.
“takes a moment to put its saddle on it”
Are there people who are skilled in riding pokemon bareback, be it land, sea, or air?
“She quickly climbs onto the saddle”
If a pokemon is wearing or carrying anything, would the item accompany it into a pokeball?
“it carefully clutches an older woman in its talons”
I thought of Aerodactyl in the Adventures manga trying to carry Red and ALL of the rest of his pokemon.
“below the tallest buildings to avoid lightning”
I wonder how Falkner approaches Challenge matches in which his opponents use Electric-type pokemon.
“choosing to ignore those who are likely still ahead”
There just aren’t enough people to spare in Vermillion. The ratio of civilians to trainers is too much.
“something burst out from underneath and inside it”
Imagine being underground, and stalked and hunted by a malicious and cruel ground-type pokemon.
“Drowned in a goddamn puddle”
“makes a much louder sound when it falls”
I now also hate hate Psychic-type pokemon.
“four of them, one taller than the others”
This is where Blue would have really been useful to the group.
“combined mental attack”
Do Drowzee and Hypno have a hierarchy system? Do they live, hunt and/or travel in groups?
“with a headbutt”
Not just mental attacks. Drowzee are physically tough as well.
“she knows she used it three times before”
Having to use drugs and stims on yourself as well as your pokemon. I like it.
“getting punched in the stomach”
“feeling absurdly guilty”
I laughed at this.
“they were fed on”

“temporarily lose their memories, have trouble with random types of physical movement or coordination, can’t control their emotions, hallucinate”
Mental damage and illness is a horrifying thing. It is absolutely not something to be mocked or laughed at.
“know that she was left behind”
She’s dead. There’s nothing they can do for her at this point. They have to focus on the living.
“buy a bigger container ball”
Interesting. How is a Heavy Ball different from an ordinary pokeball? Is it physically larger?
“the flygon that glide soundlessly overhead”
Air support. Nice.
“he steps forward to clasp hands with him”
Jack has met Giovanni before.
“The hospital is burning”
The building was probably designed and reinforced to be fireproof, and none of that was able to stop Zapdos’ Zap Cannon from severely damaging it.
“There are whole blocks that are dark”
So much damage to an entire city, and the majority of it caused by a single pokemon. And this is supposed to be the LEAST bad of all Stormbringer events ever.
“how I could have dealt with those drowzee better”
(looks at what Red did beneath the Rocket Casino) If I were him, I wouldn’t have regretted one bit of it. It was a ‘them or us’ situation.
“willing to switch to lethal attacks right away”
The instinct and willingness to kill. (looks at Sakki) Huh.
“the thing she created adopted so fully that it’s being applied beyond her own views and boundaries for it”
I wonder how many people in Kanto own one or more abra now.
“every time they glance at Jack”
Imagine being in a group in which the most skilled and experienced one is the first one to die.
“they all begin their journey past”
I don’t know why, but for some reason I thought of Napoleon’s Retreat from Moscow in 1812.
“only those of you with bikes or pokemon to ride”
Now I’m imagining Blue participating in a race in which the racers must use pokemon, not bicycles.
“One of her arms was broken in three places, and some ribs on that side, and her lung”
I thought of Adventures-Giovanni telling Adventures-Red that by the time the latter’s Pikachu could emerge from its pokeball, then charge up launch its Thunderbolt attack, Giovanni’s Nidoqueen would have impaled Red himself with its Poison Sting.
Can you reach for, send out and command your pokemon to attack before the enemy pokemon reaches YOU?
“brought over from the main building’s storage”
In a world like this, I’d want my residence to have a panic room or better yet a reinforced bunker.
“You should have stayed there”
I wonder what Professor Juniper thinks of Leaf’s actions in Vermillion. Is she aware of Natural?
“Take care of her, E”
And neither Elaine or Leaf ever see her again…
“you don’t have to follow”
Jack is not stupid. He knew what he was going into. But in my opinion, he may have contributed to Aiko’s death here.
“his pokemon keep going”
Have there been cases where a trainer’s own pokemon disobeyed orders that would have gotten the trainer killed?
“she wouldn’t be able to live with herself, would never be able to look Blue or Leaf in the eyes again”

“It’s okay…I’ll be back soon”
Aiko lies to herself right up until the end. She refuses to listen to Red, and this results in her death.
5/1 c92 3Rusty Thebanite
There is something precious in being there for the small steps. A lot of stories forget that something has to be personal to get you invested, not a spectacle, but you've really gotten a handle on it. Also, I love Duncan. Like, a lot.
5/1 c92 iniminimagimo
Learning how to lose! I'm getting dome serious method of rationality vibes here!

Found a few typos, I think:

[But if you're actively keep an illusion going instead of building from what's real..." Duncan shakes his head. "You're rolling the dice, again and again. On a long enough timeline, they won't come up in your favor."]

I think "keep" should be "keeping" instead, or just have "you" instead of "you're".

[Duncan is watching him. "How about this; if you win our match, you don't leave until I say you're ready to leave, or three months, whichever comes first."]

I think Duncan meant "If I win our match...".

Hey great chapter!

Every time I read a PTOoS chapter, I get pumped for weeks! This fic is not only entertaining, it's inspiring, and I find myself applying some of what I read here in my life and liking the results!

Thanks! Really!
5/1 c92 1RV-Xrd
I was noticing Blues change of focus from his original goals to getting and maintaining the right sir of attention and the build up to his current problems is quite masterful.
I very much look forward to what happens between him and Koichi
4/26 c20 12Azdgari
So... is the brilliant but misanthropic psychic doctor Laurie a House reference (Hugh Laurie)?
4/25 c91 8Bardothren
I love the sheer amount of detail that goes into this story. There's a lot of disciplines drawn upon, most notably scientific research, journalism, and psychology, that are interwoven with individual characters. Giovanni has been a fascinating puzzle for me thus far, as it's not entirely clear how much of a villainous figure he is at this point, and the portrayal of legendaries as natural disasters is an intriguing angle as well, one that I haven't seen explored before.

The deaths, and the character development around them, are also quite delightful. I'm a sucker for stories that aren't afraid to kill off some characters.

This story's one that I look for in my updates. Thanks for the hard work, and I look forward to seeing more!
4/23 c64 1CMY187
“it felt like all control was gone”
Karen was insane to try to take on Zapdos by herself.
“his forced decision to join Vermillion Gym”
Surge has ambitions of his own, and he sees Blue Oak as someone who could help him in achieving them.
“Aiko, Glen, Elaine, Taro, and Chie”
Blue wants to build a following, but it has already suffered casualties, and not only from wild and Legendary pokemon but also from Renegades.
In my opinion, the worst opponent for a Renegade to face is another Renegade.
“constantly slowing down or dodging the crowds of people”
How do you maintain order and discipline under Pressure caused by the Legendary pokemon?
“every minute a different vital decision mattered”
Blue has been through Viridian Forest, MT Moon and the hunt for the absol. He also at this point has two Gym Badges to his name. Surge and Erika already have treated him differently from other Challengers.
Who would Blue seek to face next? For now it seems it may be Sabrina. If so, I look forward to it. There’s no way that Sabrina has not taken note of the fact that Blue is Red’s closest friend.
“With such amazing friends, anything felt possible”
Red’s decision not to follow Aiko into certain death has affected Blue’s perception of him. I like that Red stands by it, refuses to apologize for it, and insists that he did nothing wrong. The worst arguments are when both sides are correct.
“by a handful of rangers and gym members”
They do what they can, but there is only so many of them. Are there settlements with civilian militias?
“so they could report their pokemon and trainer experience”
Perhaps someone would design a way for this to be done quicker, though it would obviously limit secrecy and confidential information.
“for more important people to decide what to do with him”
Blue at this point, heck even as of Chapter 91, is still young and inexperienced compared to many others. However, he has been through his share of struggles that I can safely say that he is no longer an amateur. Still, he has a long way to go.
“around the pokemon center”
They’re not just hospitals, they are defensible shelters. Some centers may even be fortresses in their own right.
“the half of the building facing the oncoming storm”
If there is a way to shield a building from Pressure, everyone would probably already have installed or are installing it.
“This is all Surge”
After the events here as well as the emergence of more Legendary pokemon, other settlements may be looking to strengthen their defenses and security measures.
“the bunkers below it”
“just another cog in a machine”
I smiled at this.
“He shouldn’t think of them that way. They’re other trainers just like him”
Brendan and May have made history in co-operating with Latios and Latias…assuming of course that they were given any say in the actions and decisions of those two pokemon.
“he spares one last worry over Red and Leaf”
He can’t dwell on them now. For the moment he must focus on his own predicament.
“The command is almost lost in the other trainers’”
Who in this story are considered to be among the best trainers in the world? What about the best coordinators or breeders or hunters/capturers? (looks at pokemon beauty contests) Hey, don’t turn your nose up at those. They’re probably not easy to win.
Why am I now imagining Sam Oak being a highly skilled and competent trainer but a HORRIBLE pokemon beauty contestant?
“there are too many still coming behind them”
I thought of Blue’s team being swarmed by diglett.
“the aura of a Stormbringer”
I shuddered at this.
“two people around Blue break and run for the pokemon center”
Your writing of Pressure may just be one of the best aspects of this story, DayStarELD. Karen ended up addicted to the Pressure and it led to the death of her pokemon.
“a living tide of pokemon”
These pokemon are themselves powerful beings, yet here they flee in terror and panic from Zapdos. Meanwhile, Mewtwo loses part of his tail to a wild pokemon.
“Blue itches to catch it”
This apparently is one of the strongest criticisms of pokemon trainers; wasting time to catch a wild pokemon instead of immediately dealing with other matters.
“He never imagined that facing a Tier 3 would be so…boring”
Then Surge is doing something right. Also, I like the contrast between Blue’s situation here and that of Red and Leaf, both of whom are nearly killed taking on a Nidoqueen.
“a nidoking of his own out along with a forretress”
Those two pokemon are heavy hitters themselves. Forretress in particular truly live up to their name.
“He hadn’t even known Vermillion’s Second was here”
Information is crucial in a crisis. Mismanaged staff work was a big factor in Napoleon’s defeat at Waterloo.
“if he doesn’t want to join the gym”
Blue really is crazy and restless. He’d rather be in the thick of the struggle than behind a defensive wall.
“climbs the barrier in a mess of vines”
Those things can climb. How far and high can a weepinbell climb without pause?
“his first in-person sighting of a Stormbringer”
I grinned at this.
“Nothing except maybe the frustration at the distance between what he wants, and where he is”
Blue does not want to spend years chasing after the Stormbringers, but that honestly seems to be a likely outcome. Not even Giovanni could stand against such titans. The most he could do is divert their attention. Actually turning to fight one would be suicide.
“the sight of his nemesis”
I can see why Red claims that Blue has one heck of an ego.
“He needs to do something, something meaningful”
As of Chapter 91, Blue has been involved in something that is downright bizarre and terrifying; the events at Lavender Tower.
“They survived. The Stormbringer is gone”
Surge’s systems and policies led to one of if not the lowest death toll from a Stormbringer event in history.
“Calling that a Zap Cannon is like calling a Hydro Pump a Water Gun”
And Zapdos wasn’t even really trying. I don’t think that attack even COUNTS as a Zap Cannon for Zapdos. What may be a Zap Cannon for a Raichu or Electabuzz may only be a Thundershock for Zapdos.
“boring is the main one he can think of that fits”
Blue is dangerous. Reminds me of the scene in Sharpe’s Eagle where an inexperienced soldier follows Richard Sharpe into the thick of the fighting at Talavera.
“caught out in the storm”
Does Blue envy Red and Leaf for what they went through in Vermillion? The two of them saved many lives that night.
“not a torrential downpour…no longer has to be fought against just to stay upright”
…and Zapdos wasn’t even that close to Vermillion City. It was a very long distance away.
“Aiko nods and tucks her phone away”
She’s dreamt and hoped to leave the tranquility of her home and to seek adventure in the lands beyond it.
“What he needs of his companions are people who will follow him into those things”
If Blue were to decide to go towards almost-certain death, would Red follow him or refuse to like he refused Aiko?
“help them get their badge just like anyone else”
I still love the writing of Blue’s arc in Cerulean City.
“He wants heroes born for that eventful fight”
Imagine if instead of a ‘hero’, it is a Renegade that captures Zapdos…
Blue supports and perhaps even idolizes Giovanni. Leaf doesn’t.
“sitting beside a radio set”
“Surge called the match just before making the announcement”
The more I review this story, the more I suspect that Giovanni may initiate the Gym Challenge match with Blue somewhere in the wilderness, with more than one of Blue’s pokemon already injured and/or weakened, and stating that this will be Blue’s first Challenge match against Leader Giovanni and that the Leader will hold nothing back including ordering his pokemon to attack Blue himself. The match won’t stop if Blue is injured (cuts, lacerations, stabbed, broken limbs or ribs, etc), and will continue until either Blue or his pokemon are considered to have been ‘killed’…and I wouldn’t put it past Giovanni to use lethal attacks against Blue’s pokemon.
In my opinion, if this were to happen, Blue lasting longer than 60 seconds would be enough to prove that he has come a long way since Chapter 91.
“He’s got a morbid streak”
Too many interesting characters, DayStarELD.
“it feels more like your own thoughts”
I hate Pressure…
“his pokemon seems mostly pleased by the environment”
Huh. Well, she IS a turtle.
“without being submerged in the Thunder God’s Pressure”
I wonder where the absol is now.
“if Zapdos had landed right in front of him”

And yet I still say that Mewtwo is the most dangerous of them all.
“a spinarak hanging from a wall”
Are there friendly wild growlithe or seel? What about dewgong? Surely not all wild pokemon are hostile to humans. Some would just run away. (looks at the Safari Zone) I wonder how that place is run in this story. You probably need proper qualifications if you wish to capture any pokemon in the Zone.
“the pokemon grips the car door and tears it open”
Machamp…what a fearsome pokemon. Strength, speed, dexterity, agility and skill…Fighting-type pokemon are not to be underestimated.
“One attack did more damage than the entire rest of the storm’s lightning combined”
I hope that this story inspires other writers to write Legendary-class pokemon in a similar vein.
“Articuno destroyed some town over a century ago without even summoning a storm, just flash freezing the whole area so severely that the trees literally exploded from the sudden drop in temperature”
Jesus Christ Almighty…
“unmatchable and unpredictable power wins”
The Elites, Leaders and Champions in the end were no match for Groudon.
“only the tallest buildings are”
The Sliph Co HQ story arc in the Pokemon Adventures manga. Blue and his Scyther were both physically trapped and smothered by Koga’s Muk (and Blue was slashed across the chest by Koga’s Golbat) while Red was tortured via electrocution by Surge’s Magneton, Voltorb and Electabuzz. Also, Green uses psychological tactics against Sabrina.
“And then she kisses his cheek, which leaves him feeling very confused”
Dammit, Blue.
“Aiko, who’s already following Jack and Mei Li”
And Blue never sees her again…
“he’d have to go in. He wouldn’t feel like he had a choice”
(looks at Red’s psydar ability) It’s a curse to Red, isn’t it?
“Was that a goddamned steelix?”
I hate you, DayStarELD.
“an exeggutor, a venusaur, a lapras, and a blastoise, all fighting at the same time”
Two Grass and two Water. All extremely powerful pokemon in their own right. And Sam is somehow able to command all four of them simultaneously.
“there’s only one person he knows who can command that many at once”
Is this Sam’s specialty; commanding multiple pokemon at the same time?
“no words are needed”
They’ve fought side-by-side before.
“can just barely keep the steelix in check, but they lack the type advantages needed to deal decisive blows”
I hate steelix. I did not react well when I encountered a wild one in SoulSilver.
4/16 c63 CMY187
“on her way to Lavender Town to talk to a ghost”
As of Chapter 91, she’s made a break-through in her case. Honestly, I doubt Fuji is going to live to see the next year.
“Silph is paying for someone’s living expenses in Lavender”
I’m guessing that the Master Ball blueprints, data, etc are among some of the most highly-guarded assets of Sliph Co.
“his collaboration on certain projects”
Fuji is willing to talk about the Master Ball but is evasive on the subject of Mewtwo.
“the disappearance of the scientists and engineers”
I have my doubts about Giovanni just allowing all those people to return to their previous lives. There’s no way he could trust all of them to never breathe a word of what they are involved in. It seems that he intended to reveal Mewtwo to the world at some point in the future, but deliberately hindered, delayed and even sabotaged his own project out of fear of Mewtwo’s power and intelligence.
“hard at work on something, both on computer and talking on the phone”
Fuji has finally made contact with Sam Oak, which means the situation is guaranteed to escalate. And Sam is no fool. He may suspect or know that that’s not all that Fuji was/is involved in.
“so far she’s managed to resist the urge to take him up on it”
I don’t think Laura is going to get much progress in her case against Sliph Co unless she is willing to break the law.
“the use of criminal actions to maximize the power and wealth of his corporate empire”
In real life, many business emperors and barons are sociopathic. You don’t become rich and powerful by being a nice person.
“he’s already targeted her in some way”
I thought of Laura’s ninja-contact.
“a drive to get things resolved as quickly as possible”
Honestly, this case could drag on for YEARS. And even if Laura does build a case, gets evidence, and presents it to a body of authority, I doubt anyone high-up in Sliph Co is going to prison.
“the man may be a criminal himself”
If Fuji is not killed, he may well end up in prison himself.
“a prolonged legal conflict over the rights of private companies to bid for dig sites along the mountain range”
I find it interesting to compare corporate empires to imperial/military ones.
“Sliph made payments”
Follow the money, Laura.
“Damn that girl. And bless her”
I love this.
“She’s as driven as Red, and as likely get herself hurt”
(looks at Leaf’s actions in Vermillion) Yep.
“one way or another”
In a way, I find N to be more frightening than Giovanni.
The most horrible aspect of this for me is that it isn’t even an attack. The Stormbringers aren’t even hostile to humans. A tsunami, earthquake or sandstorm is neither cruel nor murderous.
“on the SS Anne”
I wonder how the pokemon in the waters close to Vermillion behaved when Zapdos passed close by.
“He can’t, not after what happened last time”
Sam is a former trainer himself, which means he is more than a little crazy.
“escape countermeasures…to distract pokemon and outpace them”
“Not just trained to evade pokemon, but also trainers who will protect their passengers if needed”
Wow. Drivers in Kanto must be tough.
“I have an abra, bought it just a couple weeks ago”
I grinned at this.
“The price of abra had dropped quite a bit”
How many lives have the Oaklings saved already?
…and how many criminals and Renegades have benefited due to their actions?
“It’s been years since she did this”
For some reason I’m now imagining Laura Verres riding and trying not to get thrown off Aeosis while angrily yelling at Brock that their current predicament is entirely his fault. I suspect that Sam and Agatha have been observed more than once to bicker like a married couple.
“sets it on autodrive and checks the defense mechanisms”
I thought of the Airboat, Scout Car and Muscle Car in Half-Life 2 and Half-Life 2: Episode 2.
“Smoke cloud, flares, pokedoll deployment”
And now I’m trying to imagine a Pokemon-version of Mad Max: Fury Road. Thanks a lot, DayStarELD.
“There are a lot of doors the name Samuel Oak can open”
He must have enemies too…
“He helped form Kanto’s council”
I’m currently reading the Black Lagoon manga, having finished the anime. I wouldn’t be surprised if somewhere in this world, there is a settlement that is filled to the brim with criminals and corrupt law enforcement ala Roanapur, Thailand, with the only thing keeping the place from descending into a free-for-all chaotic mess being the most powerful crime syndicates in the settlement ensuring that any conflicts are contained and resolved quickly with the least amount of fuss and collateral damage.
“The power his status grants him flows from those who appreciate the mind and acts that earned it”
But he is only mortal, and can die like anybody else. And public opinion is extremely fickle…
“the sitting presidents of every Kanto and Johto university”
Recently, Sam’s grandson Blue and his protégé Red were involved in a horrific struggle in the Lavender Tower. Blue personally fought a mysterious and powerful entity.
“a wispy sort of fellow”
I immediately grinned just thinking of Gold. This story has already introduced Silver who I still say is one of the best characters of it so far. (looks at Gold) I just love the idea of a dex-holder/protagonist-trainer with less of a hero-complex and more of a mercenary one. Sure, looting artifacts from ancient ruins is wrong when it’s Rocket executives who are doing it, but when Gold does it, it’s okay.
“keeps his staff hurrying after him”
Elm is an enthusiastic and energetic researcher. I like it.
“when he was just a teenager”
Too much, DayStarELD.
Not gonna lie, I’m intrigued to see what this story would be like if it were posted on Spacebattles.
“Are you questioning my integrity”
I tilted my head at this. Elm struck a nerve there.
‘with a wry tone…if you decide to test it”
Are all scientists this snide?
“about what Bill is working on”
I’m grinning now. Bill is the BEST. Now I’m imagining Silver visiting his home.
“they run schools, and the knowledge that schools offer is not free”
(looks at numerous free history documentaries on Youtube) I agree with Sam. The world is changing, and the scientists would have to adapt to it.
“already standing and stretching, then moves for the exit”
I like this guy.
“you don’t deal with unpopularity well”
Sam and Elm definitely have a history considering that they are comfortable with being blunt and honest with each other.
“Go. I’ll handle this”
Yeah, Elm definitely knows Sam well, perhaps better than most.
“senses his tension instantly, and goes into combat readiness despite there being no threats around”
I always love little moments like this.
“you can’t win against the storms, only survive them, only mitigate the losses”
I shook my head at this. Thanks to this story, I could never look at Legendary pokemon the same way again.
Have the Legendary trio of Johto ever entered New Bark Town? In-game, they would flee every time they encounter the player. If there is one thing that I can be certain of them in this story, it’s that they are extremely fast. I wonder what Elm makes of them; what makes Raikou, Entei and Suicune so goddamn fast?
“What kind of a son would do something like that? To his own mother?”
You ever heard of Edmund Kemper, Seto?
“The voice was hers…so often that she doesn’t even have to say it anymore”
Great parenting there, Seto’s mom.
“it was too expensive to have his own place…and then take his mother with him to a bigger home”
At some point, Seto’s mother stopped being a parent and turned into a parasite.
“getting permission to become a trainer when he was younger had always ended in tears”
A lot of psychological issues are rooted in fear. Seto’s mother wants him close by. Can’t afford to lose the meal ticket after all.
Meanwhile, Red, Blue and Leaf are allowed to venture off into the world away from home and to make their own decisions, for better and for worse.
“his pokemon’s attack comes simultaneously with the enemy’s”
Not fast enough, Seto.
“He’s a horrible person, a lazy, ungrateful, disrespectful son”
The way I see it, Seto was emotionally and psychologically abused by his mother.
“Just a second of pure, relieved…freedom”
This story doesn’t hold back, nor should it.
“I let her die because I hated her”
In my opinion, Seto’s mother killed herself. She held her son back and prevented him from learning the skills he would have needed to survive in such a world. Thus, when she demanded that he come to protect her, he of course failed to do so. It didn’t help that she prioritized her freaking couch over her own life. I’m keeping in mind that Seto had serious problems with her even before this event happened and the Pressure struck the city.
“part of the apartment breaks away”
Ground-type, man.
“Vines are wrapped around its arm”
How strong is the average vine of a pokemon? I’m guessing that the bellsprout family have one of the best Vine Whip attacks considering that in-game, it’s the first move they know/learn.
“A constant current of electricity runs through its black and yellow feathers”
Honestly, I’m expecting Blue to one day be confronted or targeted by a cult that worships the Stormbringers.
“He stumbles to his feet and walks forward”
How many people have committed suicide due to Pressure?
“the pokemon’s sweeping tail”
Jesus is Nidoqueen one hell of a powerful pokemon. It can use its tail to attack or stave off enemies at its rear, and it is much faster than it looks.
“They’re here for him”
Seto is never going to forget Red and Leaf.
“raises a foot over the trainer”
“who stops dead just out of its range”
Holy hell.
“he steps forward”
Sliph, please make a pokeball that can be thrown from longer distances.
“the anticipation is a drug in her system”
No wonder Karen is an Elite. She ENJOYS the danger and peril. An adrenaline junkie.
“Reckless is a word that’s been used to describe her”
I like Karen already.
“Two years ago, Entei burned a line north-west through central Johto, and trainers scrambled to wall it off from Enju City”
In Pokemon Crystal, it is shown in-game that Suicune can travel on and even be fought and encountered on water. I wonder if the other two could travel across water as well.
“a living inferno that seemed to ignite the air itself”
DayStarELD, you never fail to make these Legendary pokemon to come off as truly terrifying.
“The fear of disappearing back into the masses”
Karen would rather live fast and die young than to choose the alternative.
“Being the middle child in a big family”
Will Graham: ‘Always trying to figure out where they fit in. They could make good politicians. Or lousy ones.’
“already known for her reckless battle style, a mentality that made her and her pokemon go all out to prove themselves, no matter the risk”
There may come a day in which Blue Oak would face her in battle.
“only to emerge from the cloud of steam without pause”
…yeah. Water evaporates before it could come into contact with Entei. Heck, just being close to it would probably kill you from the sheer temperature.
“Who needs therapy, when you can literally face personifications of your deepest subconscious fears, and then blast the hell out of them?”
Karen failed to stop Entei, and she failed to stop Zapdos here.
“First Stormbringer fight”
I grinned at this.
“only applies when Champions don’t do weird things like become Leaders afterward”
Ha! So she sees Giovanni as a weird person. Well, she isn’t wrong.
“Where are we taking it?”
The Stormbringers CAN be dealt with to some extent. You can get their attention and annoy them enough that they’d either chase you or move away to escape the swarm of irritating flies that are your attacks.
“The only choices risk some deaths to save many more”
People die in this world all the time. The death toll has been lessened but…
“another building collapse”
While the recent events in Lavender were taking place, Surge was probably busy with helping efforts in repairs and administering aid to injured and wounded in Vermillion.
“loud but clipped”
How does Pressure affect Giovanni?
“His decision is one of the reasons she’s even in the Elite Four”
Wait, what?
“the only other ex-Champion Leader in Indigo, and he only won his match thanks to Aeosis”
“As far as she knows the two have never battled”
I thought of Erika speaking to Lance over the phone, then immediately phoning Giovanni afterward.
“attempted to attack legendaries, either in a bid for revenge or glory”
Don’t. Just don’t. To actually try to FIGHT those things…all you can do is try to divert their attention and focus. Forget about trying to defeat them.
“in groups”
I imagined a lone trainer facing Suicune who notices them but decides that they are not a threat.
“happy that she’ll have Zapdos all to herself”
…okay. Karen is nuts. She wants to face that thing all by herself.
“what is there to fear, really?”
Karen is not afraid of dying. She’d probably put herself in harm’s way during a sanctioned match/battle.
“Your greatest weapon will only give me strength”
Not enough strength though…her pokemon simply could not match the might of Zapdos.
In Pokemon: Adventures, the Rocket Organization successfully captured the Legendary Birds, then combined them into a single, three-headed monstrosity.
“transforms the city”
Will someone please take this story and adapt it into a television series or anime? Oh, what I would give for an NC-16-rated Pokemon anime series.
“finally the glowing bird turns to face them head on”
I’m guessing that Lorelei’s powerful Ice Beams that would have torn apart many other pokemon felt to Zapdos like sharp little pinpricks.
“roars at Zapdos in defiance”
Orochi is brave.
“they lead the legend across the city”
The courage of these Elites and the trainers following them must be incredible.
“There’s no truly safe way for a prolonged fight against legendary pokemon, who seem to shrug off all but the most powerful or effective attacks”
There are probably entire GROUPS that are solely dedicated to hunting and fighting ONE Legendary pokemon.
“their response when truly challenged, is always to retaliate with overwhelming force”
(looks at Pokemon Crystal in which Suicune, for some odd, unexplained reason, would hesitate, stop and just stare at the player for a moment before running off, and later in the game would WAIT for the player in the Bell Tower in Ecruteak City) I got nothing.
“The Gym Leader manages to outpace the Thunder God”
I’m guessing that there is just no way to outpace the Legendary trio of Johto. How many trainers have attempted to chase them down only to be left in the dust?
“but doesn’t stop moving”
You stop, you die.
“a pulse of darkness so complete that even Zapdos’s glowing form is obscured by it”
Orochi is powerful indeed. But alas, not powerful enough.
“there’s nothing but water all around them”
Oh no.
“but for the mental effects”
So Orochi has three separate brains? Interesting.
“before she can stop herself”
Karen’s an ether addict, isn’t she?
“She feels more wired and alert”
(looks at the chems in the Fallout series) Huh.
“enormously long and poorly named bridge”
“throw an ultraball”

Karen, DON’T. You’d be vaporized before you could even get close enough.
“The first trainer in history to catch a Legendary pokemon”
If Karen had succeeded…what if she had gone mad with such power? And can a Legendary pokemon even BE controlled?
“prove her greatness to everyone, once and for all”
I thought of Alexander the Great becoming increasingly arrogant as he conquered more and more of the Persian Empire, to a point where he ordered his men to prostrate themselves before him, which angered them so much that they nearly mutinied against him, saying that only a god can be granted such respect.
“she has to turn Zapdos”
But she moved too close to the titan, which weakened Orochi considerably.
“Draco Meteor…Zapdos finally seems to notice them”
Frank Castle: (referring to the Incredible Hulk) ‘A lot of C4, along with a lot of Immodium…thirty pounds of high-explosive. Hit him with that on the outside and he won’t even feel it.’
“he endures the electricity and just keeps flying”
Orochi fought, struggled and endured for as long as he could.
“and Zapdos dives under it, screeching in anger and firing another Zap Cannon”
She just won’t leave it alone. She kept going after it again and again.
“the Thunder God’s cry of victory”
Knowing Karen, this may only make her want a rematch. (looks at Mewtwo, arguably the deadliest and most intelligent pokemon(?) in all of existence) ...aw, no.
4/9 c62 CMY187
“It’s worse than she imagined it would be”
No movie, TV series, video game or book could prepare a person for the real thing.
“Basic communication is difficult, and even keeping track of where they are quickly becomes an issue”
This made me shudder. Surge wasn’t kidding when he said that when the storm reaches Vermillion, people would be cut off from communication lines and would more-or-less be left to fend for themselves if they have not gotten to shelter.
“wet strands of it keep getting blown loose to poke at her eyes”
I like this detail.
“Its mane no longer glows, orange hair lying limp and darkened by the rain that spreads and dilutes the pool of blood it’s laying in”
Jesus Christ.
“She steps toward it before she can help herself”
I hate Pressure.
“Red calls out a warning”
Psychic radar. I see why law enforcement now has an interest in Red. They may employ and train psychics into their own ranks to detect and track down suspects and wild/Renegade-owned pokemon.
“there’s nothing you can do for them, just keep moving”
This is what the world would do to you if you are someone who truly wants to help others. Many people wouldn’t be suffering from such emotional turmoil as Leaf is here, and would EASILY be able to justify their own actions and indifference/apathy to themselves afterward.
“The real blame lies in the stormgod. Zapdos”
(shrugs) Sorry, Leaf. It’s just the way it is. Zapdos cannot help being what it is. It doesn’t owe humans or other pokemon anything.
“all creatures follow their nature, and can’t be blamed for being what they are”
What if Blue were to go into detail of the actions and behavior of the absol? It’s a proven fact in real life that animals with a relatively high level of intelligence are capable of being cruel, malicious and sadistic.
“Can’t kill a god, either. Not yet”
(looks at the Reapers in Mass Effect) Not gods. They are mortal, are capable of bleeding and dying, and require sustenance to function. And in my opinion, this story shows that Zapdos is also mortal; it CAN be harmed.
Also, I thought of Charles XI Britannia.
“Red still stares and doesn’t move”
More sights like this will await them on the paths they have chosen for themselves.
“she was still struggling too much against what she had felt in his thoughts”
If Red and Leaf were to become romantically involved with each other, it WILL change both their dynamic and the ones they have with Blue and the rest of their peers.
“and it’s distracting her from”
Pressure may cause a person to focus too much on one thing. It distracts them from keeping the rest of their senses alert, and appears to amplify their emotions.
“Joy’s voice would be mostly useless in the pouring rain, howling wind, and constant thunder”
I like this writing.
“The man is turning out to be more of a hassle than she’d imagined, and she wishes he’d just stayed behind”
(shrugs) You and Red went out of your way to help him and the others. Now here’s the result.
“She takes a moment to study them…Raticate”
…yeah. It’s frightening how a little rattata could become something like that.
“a door with its bottom half chewed open”
I hate Hyper Fang.
“digging through a cabinet”
It must have been ravenous. It failed to see Leaf before she saw it.
“why is she so suspicious of him”
I love that Leaf does not implicitly trust Red or Blue.
“Are you two seriously doing this now?”
I like Tony.
“I swear to you”
Lies and deceit are the key to any successful relationship.
“that’s not the deepest form of trust. Real trust requires uncertainty”
“tall enough that it got hit by the wave of flying pokemon”
I imagined an employee working in the Sliph HQ in Saffron City, their desk being close to a glass-paneled wall. The employee hears a sound and looks up to see that a Fearow is hovering just outside the building and looking directly at them.
“Its forelimbs, normally the vague shape and consistency of marshmallow flippers, stretch and thicken…hard enough to shatter the wood around it”
Interesting. I wonder what Lickitung is like.
“within moments a shape leaps out of the shadows at him…a noctowl”
Imagine being asleep in your bed as an Ariados slowly creeps across the floor towards you…
“blowing the powder back down the entry hall and slamming Raff against the wall with a sudden burst of wind”
Noctowls are nothing to laugh at. Watch out for their Hypnosis attack.
“She’d almost fallen prey to her own sleep powder”
How many trainers have been injured or killed by their own pokemon?
“she didn’t put her air mask on”
I imagine a group of Rangers – all wearing air masks – in a jungle and moving through an area that is filled with spores which restricts the pokemon they could utilize.
“the large kitchen knife in its chest”
This chapter is depressing to read.
“the broken window”
I wonder how many people in Kanto have installed bars on the windows of their homes.
“I’m sorry, she tells them”
Being Leaf Juniper is to be unhappy.
“one of nothing but pain and misery and death”
Leaf now understands why Blue and Red are so determined to put a stop to the Stormbringers.
“nuzzles his head against her side”
He has grown to care for her.
“Joy smashes the lock”
No wonder Renegades are so feared. Being in control of a pokemon grants a person incredible power.
“turn to see something red and blue and yellow streaking toward her”
I hate you, DayStarELD.
In my opinion, if this were the absol, Leaf, Raff and Scout would all be dead.
“one of the wigglytuff’s big, beautiful eyes is ruined”
Leaf hesitated, and it cost Joy her eye.
“dodges out of the way as Raff’s vines swing at it”
It’s just too fast.
“but her pokemon doesn’t listen, still stabbing at the Ledian”
I shuddered at this. Beedrill are horrifying. What do people in Johto and the other regions think of Leader Bugsy of Azalea Gym?
In HeartGold/SoulSilver, when facing him in the Fighting Dojo, Bugsy utilizes a Scizor, Shedinja, Yanmega, Pinsir, Heracross and Vespiquen.
Bug/Steel, Bug/Ghost, Bug/Fighting, Bug/Rock…Bug-type pokemon are fascinating.
“raise a forepaw to rub at them”
I love moments like this.
“quickly covering a container box”
You got sloppy there, Tony. Should’ve been more careful.
“Pain explodes through her face”
Tony didn’t hesitate here. Not the first person he’s attacked while committing a crime.
“your psydar can’t see bug pokemon”
Goddammit, what IS it with Bug-type pokemon?
“there’s barely any trace of a mind to be picked up”
I love this.
“We’re surrounded”
Red’s psydar is not entirely reliable as there are pokemon who are immune or resistant to psychic abilities.
“the people living here didn’t want to leave”
A locked door isn’t going to keep out a lot of pokemon.
“Can’t use Charmelon or Crimson indoors”
What pokemon are best for close-quarters combat?
“He’s been using his powers too much today”
Then the Rocket Casino, then Lavender Tower…it just doesn’t stop for Red, does it?
Also, yes, the Master Ball is an absolutely terrifying thing. But in my opinion it was always going to go in that direction. Sliph Co. has been working tirelessly to improve their technology and products to keep up with the demand.
DayStarELD, if you haven’t already seen it, I recommend watching this Youtube video:
‘Brilliant’ plans to win WWII: How Germany planned to win the Battle of Atlantic? (by Eastory)
According to Eastory, anti-submarine technology is NOT as difficult to develop as submarine technology, which meant that Germany’s fight to gain technological superiority against the allies regarding their subs was probably never going to work. It also didn’t help that the USA was far richer than Germany at the time.
“screw his face up against the grief”
Blue may wish that he could utilize psychic abilities, but to Red his own are just as much a curse as they are a blessing.
“an ariados is racing in pursuit”
Jesus Christ Almighty.
“and Leaf quickly runs forward with an empty ball and catches it”
Nice one. A pitched battle between Crimson and the ariados may have gone badly despite the type advantage.
“He turns back to Leaf”
Red is honestly outstanding here.
“they must be attracted to the windows with their lights on”
I thought of the Blitz in the Second World War.
“six pronged limbs…each with a staring eye that locks on to her”
I can’t look at magneton the same way ever again. Thanks, DayStarELD.
“innards exposed”
I feel sick.
“how powerful that magneton is”
And to think that magneton can evolve into something that is even stronger.
“Red, use your sakki on Charmeleon”
Is it wrong that I grinned when I read this?
“electricity flashes out again, then again”
Surge chose one heck of a type to specialize in.
“which she’d mind losing the least”
Will Graham: ‘Capture Bonding. It’s a passive psychological response to a new master. Been an essential survival tool for a million years. You bond with your captor, you survive. You don’t, you’re breakfast.’
In my opinion, the above quote applies not only to animals but also to humans, including nations, businesses and even families.
In A Song of Ice and Fire, Kevan Lannister is the only surviving brother of Lord Tywin Lannister, whom he is completely subservient to. The other two -Tygett and Gerion – had bad relationships with Tywin and are now deceased. Tygett apparently died of a summer fever while Gerion left on a sea voyage and never returned.
“faster than the sprinklers can catch it”
Sprinkler systems may be able to put out small fires, but not blazing infernos. Buildings with such systems can and have burned down.
“the old lady in the wheelchair snaps”
She’s lived to an old age in a world like this one.
“I’m afraid of crowds”
Why is that?
“that will make it easier next time”
No wonder Leaf, Red and Blue are all famous by the time they got to Lavender Town.
“there’s nothing we can do for them”
The person may be unconscious and/or unable to reach the door. As it is, Red and Leaf have helped all that they could.
“How many more lives are her mistakes going to cost”
Giovanni may believe that his goal is to ultimately save and protect people, but he is also willing to end or damage lives in order to achieve it.
“the tremor in the ground as it stomps its foot”
Poison/Ground. How does a nidoran grow to such size and mass?
“determined not to let him die alone”
I immediately thought of Red and Aiko.
4/6 c91 Guest
love love love the update as always! thanks for writing!
4/7 c91 4Parselmaster
Oooh. That's going to be interesting.
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