for My Brother's Keeper2/19 c1 arianamax177
Your story "My Brother's Keeper" has the power to captivate, let’s bring it to life!
As a commissioned artist with 4 years of experience, I specialize in turning stories into dynamic visuals, whether it’s a graphic novel, action-packed manga, or a beautifully illustrated webcomic.
Let’s create something unforgettable!
DM me on Discord: f4coso4005 or ask for my socials to see my work.
Your story "My Brother's Keeper" has the power to captivate, let’s bring it to life!
As a commissioned artist with 4 years of experience, I specialize in turning stories into dynamic visuals, whether it’s a graphic novel, action-packed manga, or a beautifully illustrated webcomic.
Let’s create something unforgettable!
DM me on Discord: f4coso4005 or ask for my socials to see my work.
9/28/2015 c1 ItsOnlytheFairytale
A really wonderful story, it's really nice to see the events unfolding from Amane's point of view. I usually dislike first person, but because of this reason you really kept me hooked on her journey. Also, I felt the attention wasn't drawn away from her when Bakura or Ryou entered to the scene, which sometimes happens when minor characters (such as Amane) are introduced as a main character.
I felt you gave her real flare, but also made her a well-balanced character. She had her own fears for the age she died at, which I really liked and I found her really easy to like and sympathize with.
I did see some other reviewers commenting about the length of your work, but personally I don't see this as an issue. I think your story flowed well and if you had split it into two, it probably would have made it choppy.
I can't believe it's the first story you've ever posted, it's really great and I'm glad you stuck with your original ending as I think that's what really suited your story. Keep up the good work! ~
A really wonderful story, it's really nice to see the events unfolding from Amane's point of view. I usually dislike first person, but because of this reason you really kept me hooked on her journey. Also, I felt the attention wasn't drawn away from her when Bakura or Ryou entered to the scene, which sometimes happens when minor characters (such as Amane) are introduced as a main character.
I felt you gave her real flare, but also made her a well-balanced character. She had her own fears for the age she died at, which I really liked and I found her really easy to like and sympathize with.
I did see some other reviewers commenting about the length of your work, but personally I don't see this as an issue. I think your story flowed well and if you had split it into two, it probably would have made it choppy.
I can't believe it's the first story you've ever posted, it's really great and I'm glad you stuck with your original ending as I think that's what really suited your story. Keep up the good work! ~
3/26/2014 c1 
72white pedal
This was so beautiful! I adored this piece!
And I feel so sorry for Ryou, his father is a jerk and he just lost a son and Amane now hates him.
Poor Amane:(
72white pedalThis was so beautiful! I adored this piece!
And I feel so sorry for Ryou, his father is a jerk and he just lost a son and Amane now hates him.
Poor Amane:(
3/25/2014 c1 Mademoiselle Wordsmith
Liked. XD
I don't know this fandom so I don't have a clue about the characters but it was still interesting to read. :)
Liked. XD
I don't know this fandom so I don't have a clue about the characters but it was still interesting to read. :)
11/5/2013 c1 6TheGeekInPink92
Well... That was flipping amazing! I love the ending, although many a tear was shed. It was well thought out and written really well. I love the RPG Monster world scene in the Manga, so I was ecstatic to read this part in your story! Awesome!
Xx
6TheGeekInPink92Well... That was flipping amazing! I love the ending, although many a tear was shed. It was well thought out and written really well. I love the RPG Monster world scene in the Manga, so I was ecstatic to read this part in your story! Awesome!
Xx
11/1/2013 c1 Guest
Wow! That was so heartbreaking, the ending! It's so sad that Amane never really got a good-bye. It wouldn've been nice to have her go to the afterlife and rest in peace but I suppose you're right that this is more realistic. I suppose it was nice of Yami to make her numb to... her soul being consumed XD Bloody hell. But she did manage to save Ryou so that's all good.
I really liked hers and Bakura's relationship. He sort of always had the upper hand but didn't show real sympathy towards her by letting her stay. How you "brought Amane to life" was really cool; I think her personality was great and you wrote a very believable and strong character.
Overall, I loved it and wonder if you'll write more. :]
Cheers!
Wow! That was so heartbreaking, the ending! It's so sad that Amane never really got a good-bye. It wouldn've been nice to have her go to the afterlife and rest in peace but I suppose you're right that this is more realistic. I suppose it was nice of Yami to make her numb to... her soul being consumed XD Bloody hell. But she did manage to save Ryou so that's all good.
I really liked hers and Bakura's relationship. He sort of always had the upper hand but didn't show real sympathy towards her by letting her stay. How you "brought Amane to life" was really cool; I think her personality was great and you wrote a very believable and strong character.
Overall, I loved it and wonder if you'll write more. :]
Cheers!
10/27/2013 c1 80TTY7
First, that was really good. I enjoyed it. Amane took us for a fun ride and her involvement in the story was really innovative and cool. She's a character I didn't know much about and to read about her in this fanfic was nothing short of awesome. (Plus, I just really love how you presented Amane's character. She's a loving sister, but she's also the kind of girl who's frank and will beat somebody up if she needs to.)
The only thing I'll say that's really negative is that I feel this story could have been spread out through chapters instead of just one. I've seen long one chapter stories before, but the length in this one, when you include all the immaculate detailing you put into it, is a little much. Still a great story, but a little difficult to get through after a while.
All in all though, I really like it. I feel there's room for improvement here and there, but as far as telling a good story goes, you nailed it. Great job and good luck in all future writing projects. :)
80TTY7First, that was really good. I enjoyed it. Amane took us for a fun ride and her involvement in the story was really innovative and cool. She's a character I didn't know much about and to read about her in this fanfic was nothing short of awesome. (Plus, I just really love how you presented Amane's character. She's a loving sister, but she's also the kind of girl who's frank and will beat somebody up if she needs to.)
The only thing I'll say that's really negative is that I feel this story could have been spread out through chapters instead of just one. I've seen long one chapter stories before, but the length in this one, when you include all the immaculate detailing you put into it, is a little much. Still a great story, but a little difficult to get through after a while.
All in all though, I really like it. I feel there's room for improvement here and there, but as far as telling a good story goes, you nailed it. Great job and good luck in all future writing projects. :)
10/27/2013 c1 12Bright Eyes Illusionist
This was very interesting and impressive for a first posting. I like the story... even if the ending was quite sad.
12Bright Eyes IllusionistThis was very interesting and impressive for a first posting. I like the story... even if the ending was quite sad.
10/27/2013 c1 halo cat
wow i'm the first commenter! That was really great Getsunohimesama! it was really nice the way you explain what happend to Amane and generally how the plot passed off and even the way she vanished following pretty well the course of events. It's like you filled up the space that neither the manga hadn't covered! Great job! Keep up like this!
wow i'm the first commenter! That was really great Getsunohimesama! it was really nice the way you explain what happend to Amane and generally how the plot passed off and even the way she vanished following pretty well the course of events. It's like you filled up the space that neither the manga hadn't covered! Great job! Keep up like this!