Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Heaven or Hell

11/5/2020 c5 r
I hate izzy so much in this, she seems so toxic and mean. Why do they do that to poor clary she is so sweet :((((
9/14/2020 c32 6Angelz444
This was amazing! So many emotions but so realistic. Thank you!
5/17/2020 c20 7eclecticfandomer
Im not sure how I like this. Im not gunna tear this fic apart but what the fuck? Lets break this down

Maybe its just me but what the fuck? Jace being a father? Out of fucking nowhere. He hates his father so he'd just leave his daughter with his father? What the fuck? You would think that he wouldnt leave her there. Jace hates his father and so he leaves her there? Also- where ths fuck is the mother? Maybe thats in another chapter but... Wow. Totally unexpected.

Ok now to the things that are actually bugging me. This needs editing. The fic bounces around tenses in a really weird and unexplainable way. This is probably just me being anal as fuck but when the tenses change randomly the fic slows down. When the fic slows down tbe reader is forced to pull themselves from a seamless reading and dissect your writing. It forces me to read and reread the sentence or even the whole passage to grasp the full meaning of what you were trying to say. There is a time and a place for tense changes... The middle of the sentence isnt the place.

This is kinda a follow up on the last paragraph but... You combine words in ways that dont make sense. You use world like 'she'd' and others but they'd change the sentences tenses. 'He's' and 'he'd' mean two different things and are in two different tenses. You could make the sentence work with the word if you changed it a tad with the intent to keep the tense consistently.

Im sorry, I truly am. With the tense discontinuity that is happening and the completely uncharacteristic jace shit, Im done. I read fiction to improve on my own and to have fun. I love books and fics. I really do. I saw that you had other fics and I cant wait to get started on them. I might change my tune and come back to this... We'll see. Keep writing because it's the only way to get better. It's what I tell myself when I write and what I firmly believe. This fic just, in this moment, isnt for me. Keep up the excellent work and never give up. You have managed to do something I may never be able to do: complete a multichaper fic.

With respect, EC (Eclecticfandomer)
2/25/2020 c5 1fifespice
sensible simon she needs to get away from sebastian and jace needs to stop being an ass
2/25/2020 c4 fifespice
think izzy has went a bit far same with jace
2/25/2020 c3 fifespice
bit of a fucked up situation
2/25/2020 c2 fifespice
sounds like fun party that lol
1/25/2019 c32 Shadowbabe123
So cute! Love it!
12/25/2018 c21 Guest
IM ACTUALLY CRYING :(
12/23/2018 c3 Guest
.THIS
this is actually made my day xxx
11/23/2018 c21 4WillowAvenue
Whyyyy?! Thsi makes no sense! Like at all if he had a daughter and he truely disliked his father why wiuld he leave her with him and like what hes just become a completely different character it’s like you’ve just wiped him away! It makes no sense that he would act like that for such a long time and there’s no sort of mention or even an inkling of though of her. I’m so confused why would you do this?!
9/10/2018 c10 Guest
My favorite part was the part with the TID characters
6/20/2018 c32 annabanana0805
omg this story is so freaking AMAZING it deserves to be at the top of the most reviewed and favorited lists for tmi! so many plot twists! I remember when this story was just about getting rid of sebastian lol
6/20/2018 c26 annabanana0805
I CAN'T TAKE ALL OF THESE MISTAKES AND MISUNDERSTANDINGS UGH
1/21/2018 c5 1MaybeInAnotherLife
Oh my gosh this is good
547 Page 1 2 3 4 11 .. Last Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service