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for the amazing world of christmas

12/16/2013 c1 4lexboss
12/16/2013 c1 14Terrence Orson
It's not completely fresh, even if the method a character uses to ruin Christmas is original, and I see quite a few grammar errors, along with 'new line' errors. The last sentence also feels out of order.

For now, I give it 1.5 out of 4 stars, but do continue this story. I'd like to see your original method of creating a situation that ruins Christmas.
12/16/2013 c1 136Agent BM
I only have one problem with this story, it's all just one big jumbled up paragraph. The sentences should be spaced apart if you know what I mean. I'm not saying this as an insult after what happened last time with your tawog interview story. If you can fix these sentences up I'll follow it

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