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3/10/2014 c2 11FiBeeN
Torchwood Husband's naked bonding Club. Classic! I'm going to use that one on my husband when the rugby season starts. Don't even get me started on tight head and loose head props! I really enjoyed this.
3/10/2014 c1 FiBeeN
Wonderful repartee. I laughed the whole way through, and quiet frankly the whole scene with Jack and Owen taking off their clothes... amazingly sexy. Looking forward to more.
3/8/2014 c4 Aya2013
3/8/2014 c4 I love Janto
I'm glad that Tosh and Owen set Gwen straight.
Gewn needs to think before she talks.
And except whats in front of her.
That Jack and Ianto are together.
3/7/2014 c4 Alice Carter
No, not Gwen-bashing. You have her captured pretty well. As Owen observes, "Sometimes I feel like an extra in a movie starring you and Jack." That's how the character seems to be written. Gwen - and Jack, too, sometimes, - is a ready-fire-aim kind of person. Do what needs to be done and pick up the pieces later. That's needed sometimes, but at the end of "Meat" when Gwen launched into her tirade, she didn't stop to think about what she was saying or how it might hurt the others. I've always hated how that scene left the episode with such an unresolved mess. At any rate, here Gwen recognizes that she made a mistake. Tosh is right: "You wanted it all – Rhys, Torchwood, Jack. And you were prepared to threaten anything if it meant you didn't lose any of what you love. Including Jack." And Rhys is right, too: "Rhys says I'm like a schoolgirl with a crush on the teacher – that I've got a bad case of hero-worship, and he's going to build a shrine. He thinks I'm desperate for Jack's approval, his admiration, and he's probably right." Jack has some of the blame, too, in always raising Gwen up as the reminder of their humanity and asking her, the rookie, to keep his secret from his longer-term colleagues. Hindsight, as they say, is 20/20. Now they've had a chance to clear the air.
The character revelation in this piece is Owen. You've given him so much complexity here. He couldn't be the great doctor he is without deep insight. You've shone that light on him.
As for Additional Note 1 - I was way ahead of you on that one. I had a very clear picture in my mind. :)
And it's an indescribably beautiful piece.
3/7/2014 c4 36Cerih
I share your opinion of Gwen, so I know how you really feel about her (and a certain head writer who was/is inordinately fond of her). That prior knowledge makes this chapter even more impressive. You were bold and brutally honest in your assessment of her character in this chapter, but it was NOT Gwen bashing. Just demonstrates your directness and your ability to see the character for what the really are. Kudos, my dear.

You know I adore Tosh, have done so from the first preview of the first chapter you shared; my love for your portrayal of her continues to grow. And you know what, you make me wish I was more like her. And your Owen... Wow. You've not created a three-dimensional Owen here, but rather four- or five-dimensional one. His words on the things he had missed out on due to his own actions and the subsequent regrets were really touching and ring true on so many level. But you also managed to show another side of him (and I'm not talking about the snarky bastard here), but the sense of fun he had, both in playing with photos with Tosh and for making plans, taking a conscious step forward towards becoming less bitter and embracing his life more.

I loved all the subtle reference you dropped in, Doctor Who, Adam... And also the way you're setting up for chapters to come. You're far better writer than you give yourself credit for. I know your true feelings about this chapter and I'm fairly sure your beta has something to say about that... Maybe you should listen to her a bit more...
3/7/2014 c4 sd4ianto
Once again a very outstanding piece. This one was very elegantly done. I would so love to see Jack and Ianto dressed in black tie.

As much as I like some Gwen bashing, this was handled with great care and concern. Maybe one of the reasons Ianto and Gwen don't talk is because she is bloody stupid and just can't let go of Jack. And after everything that was said I still don't think she truly gets it. But things were said with love and kindness. Not anger and contempt.

I love your Owen. I always knew he had it in him. Too bad we never got to see it (except a sideways glance now and then )on the shows.

Dancing on the Plass, the best chapter ending! Thank you. You are a brilliant writer. It is always a pleasure reading your work.
2/24/2014 c3 11Battery Bug
I believe I promised you a review for this. And I want to write it anyway. Since I have only just started reading now (chapter 3), I think I will do one review but in three parts for the different chapters. I assume my reviews will be longer for each chapter in the future, when I am only doing one at a time. But we will see.

1st chapter:
First of all, author's notes annoy me to some extent (because I cannot get myself to skip them, and they, as a result, delay my reading), but I am rather excited by the last sentence of it – that sounds promising (and perfectly in line with the feel I got from TtD). Could not help mentioning that.
But, the actual review. I love you “Pride and Prejudice” reference. It may be glaringly obvious, but that does not make it any less hilarious. And with this being a Torcwood fanfiction it is, of course, a brilliant play on the adverb “universally”, so ten points for that one.
And, in line with the above, the “a few planets short of a galaxy” comment was really delicious too. Even if I instinctively want to say “a few stars” (or “...short of a solar system”). But that was just a stray thought which only occurred right now. And is completely irrelevant anyway.
A bit further on you have Gwen explaining why Ianto is with Rhys. I really like that part. It works as a well-integrated explanation for your readers, and it is very elegantly done, too. I especially like how you chop it up with Owen interrupting – more or less stating directly that it is indeed a “lengthy explanation” which might very well test a reader's “natural impatience”. So, elegantly executed. Very neat.
Lastly, and I have mentioned this before, I love how you work with the characters. They are indeed the Torchwood characters in your story, instead of being your characters which just so happened to have the names of the Torchwood characters. I am especially fond of Ianto in this chapter (and in the later ones, but I will get back to that), because he has quite a complex personality (in canon) and the one you display here, his humorous – or puckish maybe even – side, is in every way likeable. But that is just a personal opinion.

2nd chapter:
First a little observation. Ianto's line, “...get it done and we can get under a hot shower” is perfectly consistent with the description given of him(self?) in the beginning of TtD. Of course it is no secret, but it is nice when you can see that different stories are written by the same author. Just a funny little detail I noticed.
In the beginning of this chapter you have Ianto contemplating the game they have just played. There is a line, “He'd realised that he was feeling exhilarated from the opportunity it had provided to indulge in rough physical competition without an accompanying mortal threat.” It is, if my memory serves me right, more or less identical to the reason that we are told that Ianto has given for wanting to play in the first chapter. Now, I like the reason. But there is something that does not work for me in its repetition. At first I thought that it was just that – the repetition – too much of a good thing and all that. But I think it is rather the inconsistency of it that annoys me, actually. If Ianto gave it as a reason for agreeing to play, he should not “realise” that he had felt that way. More likely he should have realised that he had been right in assuming that... etc. And this is of course just a stupid little thing (and it probably does not help that I am reading the chapters back to back, either), but I thought I would mention it, simply because I noticed. Oh, and because if I want to actually mention anything, it is going to be the little things simply because there are no big ones (:
Next comes the sauna scene. Or the transition to it, actually. That is another example of fine penmanship, I think. Two comments on this, the first a little detail, the other a general observation. You have the caretaker speaking just as Ianto “was about to respond”, which could effectively have excused you from coming up with or giving any hint of the response which Ianto might have given. His next answer, “If it means you lose the grumpiness...”, however, seems to be a variant on the original response and that just works! I have no idea if you did it on purpose, but I like it all the same. The second thing is how brilliant the whole build-up to the sauna scene is. It seems very in character for Ianto (and for Rhys, for that matter), to help clear up the field, and I can easily see everybody else using a little too much hot water and generally hurrying to get home. It seems plausible and therefore Ianto and Rhys' tête-à-tête seems very natural, too. All in all, a very elegant way of getting them in a setting where they can discuss Torchwood undisturbed (and, consequently, unreservedly).
And a little on the over all feel of the chapter. It is an awful lot of conversation, obviously, but it works (this really goes for the first chapter as well) – your way of breaking up conversation and incorporating movement into an otherwise rather static scene is really good. As for the conversation itself, that is just brilliant, too. Still very in character, but also very easy and with a natural flow. None of it seems forced to me, and all comments, questions and replies seem logical to the conversation and the context.

3rd chapter:
More conversation, obviously. And I am so envious at your skills in writing conversation. Again, it works – flow, feeling and all. As mentioned above, you get a lot of dynamics into a static scene and I love how you have the different characters enter and leave “the stage”, as it is, in turn. It works and it also allows for another part which really impresses me – namely the shifts in the conversation. You might argue that this chapter is made up of two scenes: the pub and the walk home. But the pub conversation is so varied that you could add that up in several seperate instances (banter, serious communication between X and Y, serious communication between X and Z, innuendo, team building, etc.). And that is just fantastic. I really enjoy reading that, really enjoy sitting and imagining how it would sound, how the voices raise or hold suggestions and implications and whatnot. It seems very real.
The second part, if I can call it that, the walk home with just Jack and Ianto, adds a new perspective again. First of all, I love that it is even there – the chapter could have come to a very natural close with the goodnights and goodbyes, and anything that leaves me with more to read of a story I enjoy, well, I am all for it! There is a significant change in the story here, which goes with the setting. The first part of the conversation, even the serious parts of it, seemed to fit the atmosphere of the pub, but Ianto's confessions and musings on the day are perfect in combination with a silent night-time walk, I think. As for the contents of the conversation, I am looking forward to see where you are going with that, but I do love that there seems to be more to Ianto's personality than merely the different suits he might wear.

On a more general note for the story so far - I really, really like this. I appreciate and look forward to the Janto-ness of it, but as it is now (with Janto references, sure, but no more so than what you would have expected in canon) (which is sort of my point), as it is now, it is really very enjoyable, because it gives me the feel that I have just come across a Torchwood episode I had hitherto missed. (Okay, maybe not an entire episode, not nearly enough impending doom for that.) Your story has the feel of the framework in the series – the part of the story that us crazed fans will always wish we had had more of. You said in the beginning of chapter three (cannot not read those author notes...), that you felt the team dynamics had been overlooked and this was your take on them. The whole story feels like that to me, as though it is a forgotten or neglected part of canon, that somebody finally realised we should have. And this is another testimony to the brilliance of your character study – it all feels so right.

And, once again, it has ended up being well past midnight (hence the slightly shorter comment for chapter three). But I had to re-read while I wrote the review! Okay, that is actually a lie - I made a few notes the first time I read the story. But I wanted to read it again. And that, in my opinion, is what makes a good story. So thank you, and (because I am an annoying internet-person, after all) please update soon!

(It is late - I take no responsibility for spelling mistakes or general incoherency!)
2/8/2014 c3 Aya2013
2/3/2014 c3 Latteluvr
A straight woman's dream, indeed. Love the insight into Ianto.
1/29/2014 c3 6SunshineandSparkles
I just recently read all three chapters and I've thoroughly enjoyed reading! It's very entertaining and I loved how well written it was. Definitely my favorite Torchwood item I've read!
1/28/2014 c3 36Cerih
First of all, you're neither old nor grumpy! I may have said that once or twice already...

I knew this was good when I read through all 25 pages of it without noticing the passage of time. I knew it was good when you sent me preview snippets that had me laughing so hard my ribs were hurting. I knew this was good because I'd seen what you did with the previous two chapters and I knew it was good because I know what's yet to come. Being your beta definitely has its perks. :)

Even after everything I've seen from you, the wit and pace of your dialogue still amazes me. I wish I could write dialogue like you can... It's just, wow. I suspect you put a fair bit of your own quickness into your portrayal of Ianto. And rightly so.

It's funny, genuine and all the characters have a wonderful ability to laugh at themselves. Ianto and Jack most of all in the final part of the chapter, which I think I described using the only word worthy of it: perfect. Their quiet insights, the ability to put aside the banter and the innuendo to get to the bare bones of the truth, the physical contant that reaffirms the bond that is so clearly there. Simply beautiful.

Yes, a lot of straight women may love Ianto and Jack, but you're giving them so much depth is hard to see them just as hot men to fawn over. You've achieved what you set out to do, you've provided them with consistent character development and depth beyond the glimpses we catch in the show, if we're lucky. So thanks to you, we are now lucky.

Superb, simply superb. I remain humbled and honoured to be part of this.
1/28/2014 c3 188Gmariam
You already know some of my thoughts, so I apologize for repeating myself, but repetition is good for the ego/soul, right?

The innuendo was hysterical. Loved it.

Also loved the tips to fandom - fan service, I think it's called. From the Gwen bashing line to the bit about straight girls - you know how to keep your tongue in cheek and yet still stick it out with a wink.

The way the team baited each other, starting with Jack and then Gwen, was such fun. And yet in between we get lovely Tosh: her insights with Jack were great.

Yet my favorite part, as you know, was Ianto's own character insights at the end. Most of the time we gain character insight through action, internal monologue, or other character's remarks. Yet here we have Ianto analyzing himself through dialogue not only as a cliche (which was another perfect nod to fandom!) yet as an introvert. That still knocks my socks off. Because you could read some of his interaction with Rhys as over-the-top and out of character, until you get to the end and Ianto HIMSELF explains it all. And that's an introvert, in a nutshell: yes, he enjoyed himself and the attention, but he was play acting, stepping outside himself in a new situation because he was comfortable in a small group and so he could, but still it was exhausting. He's still who he is, even if he surprised them a bit. God, that's so, so true. And what's so nice is Ianto opening up to Jack about it. I loved Jack's reactions to seeing Ianto in a new light.

Oh, and finally, this line was perfect: "Let's just be ourselves, equals, no labels, no roles." Something anyone in a relationship should aspire to, gay or straight, 21st century or 51st century. I'm going to remember that, and not for my writing: it's a life lesson, that is.

As an opera lover I really am looking forward to the next chapter. But again - warn me if I need tissues at any point because we've established that there are some things that I get very soppy about. In the meantime, I hope you are listening to Verdi as you write. Good luck! :)
1/28/2014 c3 shinee1234
i love this innuendo filled chapter. This had me laughing so much and i like the friendship between Rhys and Ianto. But the most amazing thing is that you balanced the fun stuff and the serious talk like between jack and tosh and at the end with Jack and Ianto. Thank you very much. And yes, Ianto is not just the man in the suit.
1/28/2014 c3 DareTheDevil
Ohhhh. How great was that? Happily waiting for chapter 4. What great treat to continue the story. Thanks
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