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for To Change the Past

2/19/2014 c8 bunnyguest
and we are off to the see the new timeline.
i hope that little naruto still got to be friends with iruka-sensei cause that was the changing point for him, the reason why he didn't believe he was the kyuubi and why he fought mizuki so hard. (maybe iruka could teach in the final academy year?)
really liked how you ended the chapter though...mysterious and hinting at the new future
2/19/2014 c8 gishilron
Good story, can't wait for more
2/15/2014 c7 6pardonwhoisthis
Nice :)
2/13/2014 c7 a-k12-k
*thumbs up*

I really liked this chapter as it had the essential timetravel itself.

*gasp* what will Naruto do when he sees Akatsuki again? If i were him i would kill em all except for Itachi and Konan. They both didn't really do anything bad.

Good job in this one :D
2/6/2014 c6 bunnyguest
wow...you made zetsu manage to kill everyone? that must have hurt to write.
your writing style is definitely improving...now you just have to make your chapters a bit longer and then you'll be onto a winner. :-)
once you start writing about the timetravel (i'm sure you will write some flashbacks as well), could you include why sasuke came back to the village and stayed loyal to naruto (im presuming you kept his personality the same as it is in the mange at the moment which would mean that he wants to become hokage to change the village idea).
really liked how you made kurama make naruto feel better about not giving up.
oh and don't feel back about not getting enough reviews as yet. you're story is relatively new and has only just passed the 10k word mark...lots of people like me will only search for short complete stories or long-regularly updated ones. i'm sure lots of people will soon start tot not your great story soon.
2/6/2014 c4 bunnyguest
liked how you let kakashi say his goodbye to naruto.
touching moment (even if you did kill him of too early just when the duo were getting into an interesting relationship !...sniff...sniff)
2/6/2014 c3 bunnyguest
wow funny ending...really like the new change to kakashi's personality.
2/6/2014 c2 bunnyguest
really liked naruto's reaction. well thought out chapter
2/3/2014 c6 a-k12-k
...O.O

dun dun dunnnn...

*gasp* the time travel thingamajig has finally happened! What will happen next?!

:D
2/3/2014 c6 Shiratsubasa
6 chapters and he's still in the present. When is he going to go to the future. But I favourite ur story.
2/2/2014 c5 3Mari92
Now I don't know about you, but I expected something completely different.
Having a back story is very good and all, however it didn't really entice me to continue to read it and I have have only read so far as the 5th chapter because I thought 'the next chapter must be it' to my surprise it wasn't.

The problem with story making is that you need to catch the readers or listeners attention and keep it. The usual way is by ending the chapter at a climax point or to stop in a manner that makes them curios about what will happen next. For instance, in my opinion you always end the chapter in a flat place where most people will become disinterested. Try to change that and you will see a flow of demands or encouragement to continue to write your story.

As my own writing is completely dry, I might not be the best judge or the best adviser but I still wanted to offer it. It might also be because I'm very tired too and are therefore not as excited or as inclined to feel anything. Yet I want you to keep it in mind that you shouldn't end the chapter like this one. To me the story sounded complete, done and there wouldn't be more after this. Just so you know...

Mari92
2/2/2014 c5 a-k12-k
Awesome as always ;-)
2/2/2014 c5 Sayuri36ani
good chapter! when goes naruto to the past?
1/17/2014 c4 a-k12-k
This chappie was really good, too! Though I have been wondering, as i have read many time-travel fictons. When Naruto travels back in time, will he be in his old body or in his 16-17 year old one? And this isnt Sakura or Sasuke bashing, right? Not that i would mind if it is or isnt, im just asking. Oh and does this story have romance? Or does it focus on Naruto trying to prevent the future? Again, not that i would mind either one, as this story would be great, anyway!

And poor Kakashi :(
1/17/2014 c1 16Duesal Bladesinger
It was a good start, but I'm a bit confused as to why there was no dialogue.
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