A/N: This is the first thing that I have written since I was sixteen almost 8 years ago so I'm probably a bit rusty. I wanted to get this up before tonight's episode because right now it's slightly plausible but after tonight who knows what will happen? Hopefully you enjoy this and if you do (or don't) please leave a review. Thanks!
Disclaimer: I don't own the Fosters or any of it's characters, if I did things would be much different.
Brandon Foster was in a good mood. He had just finished a very productive piano lesson with the Grim Reaper where he had received an actual almost compliment from the man. Yes, today was definitely a good day in his book. When he began these bi-weekly lessons seven months ago he hadn't believed that praise from Henry Marshall was even possible. But ever since that night five months ago - the night his mothers exchanged their vows, the night Callie ran away - Marshall had been much happier with his playing. Brandon finally had the pain.
All he had to do now was think about that night, the days following when they didn't know where she was, the brief moment of hope he'd felt when his mom told them she'd been found and then the moment that hope was crushed when Callie was sentenced to 60 days in juvie for breaking parole. Those 60 days had been torture for him, for all of them, not knowing how she was doing or being able to see her. Their family had been missing a piece and the day his mom and Lena had finally been able to pick her up was the first day Brandon was truly able to breathe since being separated from the girl he loved.
It had been almost three months since she'd returned and things seemed to finally be settling into some semblance of normalcy. It had taken less time than he thought it would for his mom and Lena to come around to the idea of him and Callie. His mom told him that their decision to not fight it came from watching him while Callie had been away and had been solidified after seeing the two of them as they were reunited; she said she never wanted to see any of her babies in that much pain ever again.
There were strict house rules in place and it had taken awhile for everyone to be fully comfortable with the idea of seeing the two of them kissing or holding hands, especially Jude whose adoption was finally moving forward. The younger boy had eventually found a way to forgive Brandon after Callie had returned home, (especially after he had learned the truth about Liam) and the more Jude saw Brandon as his brother the weirder it was to see him holding and kissing his sister. But he had made it clear that he was happy for them.
It was hard to hide from their siblings though seeing as their relationship was strictly confined to the house for at least a few more months while certain legal matters were finalized. Callie was not being adopted for obvious reasons (although if anyone asked they said it was because she was so close to being 18), but his mom and Lena refused to keep her in the system for any longer than was necessary and we're filing to become her legal guardians. He and Callie had to be very careful out in public so as not to jeopardize her guardianship or Jude's adoption. To say there was stress on their relationship was certainly an understatement, but they had the support of their family and they had each other and it was enough for now.
Now, walking through the front door, all Brandon wanted was to find Callie and share his good mood with her. Stopping in the kitchen to grab a snack he found his moms talking quietly. His mom's brow was furrowed, a look which meant she was confused about something, and Lena's mouth was turned down at the ends which meant she was worried. Brandon paused in the doorway taking in the scene before stepping into the room.
"Moms," he said, stopping at the island where they were sitting. "What's wrong?"
His mom looked up and smiled at him, instantly causing the bad feeling he had in his stomach to dissipate. It wasn't a forced smile which meant she wasn't trying to cover anything up so nothing too bad could have happened. Her brow was still furrowed though so something was definitely bugging her.
"B, there you are. How was your lesson?" she asked, taking a sip of tea from the mug in front of her. Tea. Now Brandon was starting to get worried. His mom usually only drank tea when she was upset.
"Fine. What's wrong?" he repeated, his voice getting just slightly higher giving away the fact that he was starting to freak out.
"Nothing's wrong love," Lena reassured him, grabbing his hand with hers. She sighed before continuing, "Callie had a session this morning and when she came out she was just really quiet." Her voice trailed off as the corners of her mouth turned down again.
"She's been upstairs sleeping since we got home," his mom added.
Brandon's closed his eyes and pressed his lips together for a moment. In addition to the court-mandated group therapy sessions Callie still had to attend she had also been seeing someone one-on-one once a week since she'd gotten out of juvie. His moms and her social worker Bill agreed that it would be a good idea to help Callie work through everything she had been keeping buried for years which had ultimately led to her running away.
The sessions were helping more than anyone could have hoped. Callie seemed happier than they'd ever seen her and her self-esteem was building slowly. She still had a long way to go but you could see it in the way that she was able to put herself first in situations instead of always placing Jude or someone else's needs above her own. She was able to say she wanted something or open up and tell people how she was feeling without the fear that she was a burden. But even with all of the progress she was making it was still impossible to know how she would act after a session. Sometimes she would come home perfectly fine, a smile on her face and she would want to spend the whole night with the family.
Once she'd come home quiet and detached and only wanted to spend time with Brandon seeking physical comfort. It had completely freaked him out and he had pissed her off when he told her he didn't think they were ready to go that fast. Later she had broken down in his arms and they had decided they would be better off taking their relationship slow. He hated that he'd had to reassure her that he wasn't going anywhere.
Her next session she finally opened up about Liam.
Other times she would come home quiet and contemplative and wouldn't talk to anyone for hours preferring to think her session over by herself until she could make sense of things. But the scariest reaction by far was when she came home and took a nap. Callie wasn't a nap person by nature so this usually meant that her therapist had pushed her too far and she was either completely emotionally exhausted or else whatever they'd talked about had been so bad that she didn't even want to be alone with her own thoughts. If Brandon was around when this happened he was usually able to get her to focus on something else for long enough that she would snap out of it, but occasionally his lessons would overlap with her sessions like today and he wouldn't be there. He hated not being there for her.
Opening his eyes he gave a quick nod to his mom, straightened his shoulders and walked to the fridge grabbing a couple water bottles for him and Callie and one of the brownies Lena and Mariana had baked earlier in the week.
"I've got this," he assured his moms walking purposefully out of the kitchen.
"B," his mom called making him turn around. She and Lena were looking at him with those smiles they'd adopted over the last couple of months when they thought he and Callie were being particularly adorable. He felt himself blush a little as he always did when they got that look and hoped she wouldn't keep him much longer. "Let us know if she needs anything ok?"
With another quick nod he turned around and ran up the stairs. Making his way to Callie and Mariana's open door he could hear his sister's music playing and her laughter. He hoped that meant that Callie was awake and laughing with her but standing in the doorway he saw Mariana was sitting on her bed talking on her phone. He glanced quickly at Callie's bed but it was empty. Frowning he tried to get Mariana's attention but she just shooed him away not even sparing him a glance. Rolling his eyes he went back into the hallway thinking she might be hanging out with Jesus and Jude in their room when he noticed that his bedroom door was closed. Walking over he opened it slowly and felt himself smile when he saw her. She was lying on her stomach on his bed, her face buried in his pillow and her hair covering it from view.
She looked so peaceful he contemplated letting her sleep longer but knew that it was better if he woke her up and got her talking. Walking fully into the room he went to close his door but realized that even in this situation his moms wouldn't appreciate him breaking the open door rule. Pushing the door all the way open he set the snacks down on his nightstand and sat down on the bed next to his sleeping girlfriend. Moving the hair away from her face he froze. Tear tracks ran down her cheeks from her eyes that even closed Brandon could see were red and puffy. He instantly felt guilty again for not being there when she got home even though he knew it was out of his control. Callie hardly ever cried but when she did it always broke his heart.
Having sensed that someone was staring at her Callie began to stir and Brandon willed his face to have a more neutral expression. He put his hand on her back rubbing soothing circles to let her know he was there.
"Hmmm, B?" she questioned rolling over to lie on her back.
"Yeah, it's me," he confirmed, smiling as Callie pushed herself into a seated position shoving her hair away from her face and blinking her eyes open.
"Hey," she said giving him a small smile. "How was your lesson?"
"It was good." Reaching for her hand he looked her right in the eye. "How are you doing?"
"I'm fine," she said in that way that told him she was anything but fine.
"You wanna talk about it?" He paused to gauge her reaction before reaching his other hand to the nightstand to grab the brownie. "I brought reinforcements."
A real smile took over her face and she leaned forward to brush her lips against his before taking the brownie from him. "I wish I could tell my therapist that I have you," she sighed before taking a big bite out of the brownie.
Brandon smiled sadly lifting her legs and draping them across his own so he could sit closer to her. "I know; I wish I could tell everyone that I have you." He felt a rush of pride when he saw her blush and bite her lip letting him know he'd said the right thing.
She didn't say anything else focusing instead on the brownie, so Brandon reached for the water bottles handing her one before opening his own. The couple sat in a comfortable silence for a few minutes just enjoying each other's presence. Brandon gave her a mock glare as she brushed the crumbs off of her white sweater letting them fall into his bed.
"Oh like there aren't already a million crumbs in here," she laughed pulling her legs off of his and tucking them underneath her. Brandon knew this pose well. He remembered seeing it right after she met with the ADA - when she yelled at him and told him that she didn't live in a perfect world - and he'd seen it many times since then. This was the stance she took when she felt vulnerable and needed to get something off her chest. He knew it was best to not say anything and to just let her start the conversation. "So um..." she paused, glancing away. Brandon could see her walls going up again as her body tensed and her eyes darted around his room. He put his hand on her knee trying to get her to come back to him but she seemed to have made up her mind not to talk about whatever was bugging her. "So how about you play me what you and the Grim Reaper were working on earlier." She finally made eye contact, silently pleading for him to drop it. Giving her a soft smile he stood up pulling her with him to the keyboard.
Brandon pulled away from Callie as they heard his mom calling them all for dinner. They had started off just playing music, but it wasn't his fault that his keyboard was set up in a nook blocked off from the door and therefore the perfect location to enjoy some alone time with his girlfriend. Looking at her he was happy to see that she was smiling. She seemed lighter than she had earlier but he could tell something was still bothering her. Callie leaned forward to give him one more quick kiss before rushing out of the room and down the stairs. Brandon stood up turning off the keyboard before following her.
Walking into the kitchen Brandon saw Callie and the twins setting the table and laughing about something. His moms were standing off to the side watching them, glancing over at Brandon when they noticed him in the entryway. Their smiles grew as Callie let out a loud laugh over something Jesus said and his mom shot him a quick wink.
"Brandon, could you please go see what's keeping Jude so long?" Lena asked before turning back to the stove.
Turning around he ran back upstairs stopping in the open doorway of the room his brothers shared. He loved thinking of Jude as his brother, especially now that the younger boy was actually speaking to him. Currently Jude was sitting at his small desk working on something and as always he seemed to be off in his own little world. Brandon stepped closer so he could see what the boy was working so hard on and caught a glimpse of a colorful piece of paper with the words Happy Birthday scrawled in Jude's neat handwriting.
"Whose birthday is it?"
Jude jumped in his seat quickly rushing to hide the card with his arms. "Don't you knock?"
"Sorry, the door was open. Wasn't Connor's birthday two months ago?" Brandon asked, trying to remember if Jude had any other close friends who he would be making a card for.
"Yeah it was. It's for someone else. But I can't tell you, she told me not to tell anyone," Jude said quickly, standing and trying to walk around Brandon to the door.
Brandon smiled at his brother's embarrassment moving to block the door. "A girl, huh? Anyone I know?" As soon as he'd said it Brandon could see the discomfort on Jude's face (the younger boy had never been very good at hiding his emotions or at lying for that matter) and knew that he was right. Thinking about it though he realized that he didn't know any of the girls in Jude's grade and he'd never really seen him talking to any either. Suddenly a thought occurred to him and he felt a chill run down his spine. "Jude it isn't Callie's birthday, is it?"
Jude's eyes widened slightly before he gave a hesitant nod. "Tomorrow actually. I don't know why she doesn't want everyone to know, this is the first time we can actually celebrate as a family, but she told me not to tell you or moms. She's going to be so mad that I told you."
"Jude it's ok. Um, everyone is waiting for us for dinner. We'll talk to moms after." Brandon was in shock. How was it possible that he didn't know Callie's birthday? And why wouldn't she tell them? Was this what had been bothering her earlier?
Following Jude downstairs he tried to look natural as he took his seat next to Callie at the table. Looking across the table he saw that Jude was trying to do the same thing, and they were both failing miserably.
Callie leaned over to whisper, "Is everything ok? Jude isn't mad at you again right?"
Brandon was momentarily distracted by the feeling of her breath tickling his ear before shaking his head. "No," he whispered back. "Nothing like that, I'll just talk to him later."
Callie sat back in her seat giving him a curious glance before turning back to her conversation with Mariana. Dinner passed rather quickly with Mariana, Jesus and Callie carrying most of the conversation. Brandon was lost in his own thoughts trying to figure out why Callie would want to keep her birthday a secret and what he was going to do about it now that he knew. Jude meanwhile stayed silent looking terrified that he was going to blurt everything out now that he'd told someone, and his mom and Lena kept looking at them with worried glances.
Once everyone was done eating they all began to move around clearing the table and starting the dishes. Brandon walked over to his mom and asked to speak with her and Lena in private; he needed their help if he was going to figure all of this out. He glanced over at Jude giving a reassuring smile before leading his moms out of the room. He passed the living room where they would normally go to talk and instead led them upstairs to their room. He waited for them to sit down on their bed before closing the door and walking over to stand in front of them. He put his hands in his pockets and started to pace back and forth a bit figuring out where to start.
Lena's mouth was turned down at the corners again but she was looking at him calmly waiting for him to speak. His mom looked like she wanted to shake the words out of him and probably would have if Lena wasn't holding her hand.
Taking a deep breath he just came out with it. "Did you guys know tomorrow is Callie's birthday?"
He knew the answer was no by the looks on their faces. His mom looked stunned and just sat there staring at him while Lena got up and hurried to the table on her side of the bed. She pulled a folder out and started shuffling through a stack of papers before finding the right one. "How did we miss this?" she asked, handing the paper to his mom. Brandon saw that it was a photocopy of a birth certificate. "We never even looked at it Stef."
He saw a look of guilt pass over his mom's face. Both moms were clearly upset with themselves and honestly he was a little upset with them as well. He wished that they would have known this months ago so that they would have had time to plan something special for Callie instead of just throwing something together the night before.
"Was this why she was so quiet earlier, B?"
"I don't know mom. I think so, I mean she started to tell me what was wrong but then she kind of closed off. I found Jude making a birthday card and got him to tell me who it was for. He says she told him not to tell any of us, but I just don't understand. Why wouldn't she want us to know it was her birthday?" His frustration could easily be heard in his voice and he just hoped that his moms could give him some answers.
"Oh love, come here for a second." He dropped down on the bed next to his mom as she wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "I don't think Callie has had a real birthday since she was ten years old and even with all of the progress she's made over the last few months I think she still believes she doesn't deserve some things. Us not taking the time to learn her birthday probably hasn't helped with that at all." She let out a long sigh before looking over his head at Lena. "What are we going to do about this?"
Lena came over and sat on Brandon's other side. "Well Callie hates surprises so I think we need to talk to her tonight to apologize and let her know what to expect for tomorrow. As for how we should celebrate, I'm up for suggestions."
"I had a couple ideas. I mean she's already gotten a taste of what birthdays are like around here. She was in juvie for mine but she saw Jesus and Mariana's, which granted wasn't a normal birthday but you still woke them up and made them a special breakfast and everything like you always do. And then," he took a breath, trying to decide if he wanted to tell them about the next part - he figured it couldn't hurt, "I have a surprise for her. I've been writing a song just for her, and it's not done yet but I'm going to stay up tonight and finish so I can play it for her tomorrow."
There were those damn smiles again. Brandon felt himself blush and looked down at his hands while his moms talked to each other over his head.
"We raised a good one here, my love."
"Yes, Callie is definitely a very lucky girl," Lena agreed with a slight laugh.
"Do you know what this calls for?"
"Mama sandwich!" Suddenly Brandon found himself pressed between his two moms with their arms wrapped around him in a tight hug. He half-heartedly pretended to be too cool for this tradition but he couldn't stop the smile from breaking out on his face or the laugh he let out when his mom planted a big wet kiss on his cheek.
Suddenly they were interrupted by a knock on the door and Lena called for whoever it was to come in. The door opened and Callie stepped in smiling at the scene before her.
"Sorry to interrupt but everyone is wondering if we're still going to watch a movie."
"Hey sweets, come in here for a minute. Mama and I need to talk to you." Callie stepped into the room, her smile turning nervous. "Brandon can you go downstairs and see if everyone can agree on a movie?" Brandon looked at his mom confused. He wanted to be here when they talked to Callie. "B, this is something we need to do by ourselves. We'll be down in a little bit. Oh and start the popcorn too please."
Reluctantly he stood and walked over to Callie, he could tell she was really starting to freak out at this point. Wrapping his arms around her waist he leaned down and kissed her. "Don't worry it's a good thing," he reassured her with a smile. Her eyes were still questioning but the fear was gone. Pulling away he made his way to the door. "See you guys in a bit," he said before closing the door behind him.
They'd been upstairs for almost fifteen minutes and Brandon had no idea what that meant. He really hoped that his moms were getting through to her and that she wasn't mad at him or Jude. He'd sent the twins to go make the popcorn while he filled Jude in on what was going on upstairs. They sat next to each other on the couch waiting and a few minutes later they heard footsteps on the stairs. Jude shot up from the couch running to wrap his arms around his sister as soon as she stepped into the room.
"I'm sorry I told, but Brandon asked and I thought he should know. I mean we finally have a family and families celebrate birthdays, and I just wanted you to be happy."
"Baby I'm not mad," Callie cut him off while wrapping her arms around him too. "I mean I was at first but Stef and Lena talked some sense into me." She looked over her shoulder at the women in question with a soft smile. "I'm actually kind of excited about tomorrow."
"What's tomorrow?" Jesus asked as he followed Mariana into the living room each of them holding two giant bowls of popcorn. Everyone's eyes went to Callie and Lena gave her an encouraging nod letting her know it was her announcement to make.
"Um, it's kind of - it's my birthday," she stated awkwardly.
"What?! Oh my God Callie why didn't you tell me? Wait, you're going to be seventeen! You can get into R rated movies now."
"Yes, but she can't buy you a ticket so I don't know why you're getting so excited Miss Thing." His mom laughed as the smirk slid off Mariana's face before taking one of the bowls of popcorn from her.
Callie smiled walking over to take her place on the couch next to Brandon tucking herself into his side. "I'm not mad at you either so you can stop looking like I caught you stealing a Matchbox," she whispered before giving him a kiss on the cheek.
Brandon laughed letting out the breath he'd been holding since she'd entered the room. She loved to tease him about that story, but it had made her laugh then and it was easing the tension now so it was worth it. He wrapped his arm around her before grabbing the bowl of popcorn Jesus was handing him.
"Alright no more talking, movie is starting," his mom ordered as everyone settled into their seats. Callie snuggled closer into his side and grabbed a handful of popcorn. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and turned his attention to the TV.
By the end of the movie everyone seemed pretty tired even though it was barely 10:30. Jude had fallen asleep in his chair and Lena was trying to lead him up to his room with Mariana trailing behind them. After tidying up the living room his mom told them to go up to bed, which Brandon thought was a little ridiculous since it was 10:30 on a Saturday night, but he did need to get to work on finishing Callie's present so he didn't argue.
After changing into his pajamas Brandon heard a knock on his door. He called for the person to come in and wasn't too surprised when it was Callie who opened the door. She pushed it open fully before walking over and wrapping her arms around him. Brandon's arms immediately encircled her, pulling her closer to him.
"Thank you," she mumbled quietly into his chest.
"For what?" He pressed a kiss to her hair before resting his chin on top of her head.
"For believing in me. Again."
"Anytime," he repeated the promise he'd made at the wedding. He would always believe in her even when she didn't believe in herself. "Was this what you were trying to tell me earlier?" At this point he was almost positive it was, but he still wanted to make sure there wasn't something else going on.
"Yeah," she sighed, pulling away slightly to look up at him. "My therapist has been telling me to tell you guys for a while, but I think I was just - I don't know, scared I guess."
"Why?" He brought a hand up to tuck some of her hair behind her ear and let his hand rest on her cheek. She was so beautiful and he felt so lucky to have her in his life. He hated that years of abuse and self-doubt had made it so she couldn't see what he saw when he looked at her. He knew she would eventually it would just take time, and until then he and their family would just have to remind her.
"It's just I've always thought of my birthday as just being one year closer to being eighteen and finally getting out of the system." She closed her eyes and leaned into his hand for a moment. "But for the last few months I've been dreading it because I don't want to leave here. I don't want to leave you or this family." She opened her eyes, looking up at him with a soft smile and he stared back at her in shock.
"Callie you know you're not going anywhere when you turn eighteen right? I mean maybe college or something, but this is your home and your family and we won't-" She placed a hand on his chest to stop his rant and grinned up at him.
"Well I know that now. I guess I always did, I think my stupid brain just needed to hear Stef and Lena say it out loud. Which they did, many times in fact."
He took a deep breath and pulled her closer to him. "Good, because you can't leave again," he mumbled into her hair.
"I promise," she whispered softly. They stood there holding each other for a few minutes before Callie pulled back to look at something over her shoulder. "Wanna hang out until midnight? You can be the first one to wish me Happy Birthday."
Brandon looked behind her at his alarm clock. There was still a little over an hour until midnight and he had a lot of work to do on her song, but he didn't want her to leave just yet. He walked them to his bed and lay down on his side leaving room for her to lie down next to him. They stayed like that sometimes talking or sharing kisses or else just staring at one another until the clock read 12:01.
"Happy Birthday Callie." He leaned over and brushed his lips against hers but she was having a hard time keeping her eyes open. He sat up, pulling her with him and walked her to his door. He watched her shuffle across the hall and turn around to give him a small wave before disappearing into her room. He closed his door with a grin and walked to his keyboard plugging in his headphones and settling in for a long night.
So far Callie's birthday was going great. Brandon had continued working on the song well into the night, finally falling into his bed at around four in the morning. Five very short hours later he had been wakened by a scream from Callie and Mariana's room. He'd jumped up, running to their door and was met with the welcome sight of his moms tickling his laughing girlfriend on her bed. Glancing to see if Mariana was awake he'd shared a look with his sister before they'd both ran across the room to join in on the attack.
Afterwards everyone had gathered in the kitchen for a special pancake breakfast where Jude presented Callie with her birthday card and a ridiculous birthday crown that he and Mariana had made. Even though she had rolled her eyes upon first seeing it Callie had worn the crown for the rest of the morning. His moms had announced that the rest of the day's plans were up to Callie who decided that she just wanted to stay around the house for the day, so they'd spent the morning and early afternoon playing board games and watching another movie.
Now his moms and Mariana were out at the store getting food for dinner as well as a birthday cake. Jesus and Jude were in the living room playing video games so Brandon took Callie's hand and led her up to his room and back to his keyboard. He had never been so nervous to play a piece in his life; no audition or recital could compare to this moment and how much he wanted her to like this song. He'd always had the problem of not being completely happy with his original compositions, always feeling like there was something more he could do to make it better, but after last night he felt like this one was actually complete.
"So, I um wrote you a song."
"You wrote me a song?" she repeated as she sat down next to him. She looked so adorably confused that he couldn't help but laugh a little.
"Yeah, I've been working on it for a few months and after last night I knew that I wanted to finish it for today." He turned his body to face her and saw the shock in her eyes. "It's you, in music. How I see you and what I hear when I think about you."
She was quiet for a minute before smiling up at him. "So are you going to play it for me?"
He turned back to the keyboard and after a slight pause he started to play. The notes filled the room and leaked into the hallway through the open door. He hoped the video game was loud enough so his brothers couldn't hear because he wanted this to just be for Callie, at least for now.
The notes were complex, just like her; he had tried to convey her beauty and her pain, her strength and her vulnerability, her laugh, her sarcasm, her wit and all the little things that made her Callie. After a few minutes he let the last note hang in the air for a moment before turning to face her again.
She was staring at him, her eyes glassy with tears and the corner of her lip tucked between her teeth. She leaned forward and kissed him with everything she had and he felt a tear slide down her cheek and onto his. He pulled back to try and figure out what she was feeling. He hadn't thought she would cry, but he could tell that she was happy as she held his gaze and reached a hand up to run through his hair.
"I love you."
His eyes widened slightly and a grin tugged at his lips. It was the first time she had said the words to him directly. They had both told their family that they were in love back when they were trying to convince everyone to give them a chance, and he had said it to her a couple of times but she hadn't felt ready to say it back until now. The warmth that spread through him was unlike anything he'd ever felt and he never wanted to forget this moment. Leaning down he kissed her again drawing a smile from her.
"I love you too. Happy Birthday Callie."