9There Once Was A Harpy From Kent...
A loosely connected smattering of limericks about Lizzy, Darcy, and of course Lady Catherine and more. Instead of trying to tell a story, as I am attempting to do in 'Limericks of Lizzy' these are character sketches, little drabbles in limerick form. This is more irreverent than 'Limericks of Lizzy' and hopefully it's funnier too.
Also, a big 'thank you' to all who are playing with me in my sandbox. I by no means intend these as great writings. I just had an impulse to play around, and found a really fun and supportive community to do it in. So, THANKS!
And now, without further ado...
CHARACTERS FROM KENT
Lady Catherine, the harpy from Kent,
Had a nephew named 'Darcy' – a gent
Auntie thinks that she can
Force his marriage to Anne
But lusty Lizzy is more to his bent
Lady Catherine was very demanding
Her wishes she was always commanding
"You must do it this way!
"You must heed what I say!"
Dissent beyond her understanding.
Cousin Anne has always been sickly
Momma wants her to marry Will quickly
Should Will do his duty?
Or wed for love and beauty?
Will don't be an arse, wait for Lizzy!
Mr. Collins is an odious man
He brown noses whenever he can
His noble patroness
Wants a sycophant, I guess
She says, "Toad, jump!" He's hers to command
Mr. Collins, the heir to Longbourne
"You must marry and soon!" Catherine warned
"Choose one of the sisters
"To make you her 'Mister'
"And return with her before the next morn."
Mr. Collins for Lizzy he offered
But Lizzy rejected his proffer
"To the hedgerows we go!
"Who are you to say no?!"
Mrs. B asked, making it awkward
So Mrs. Bennet screeched, "Oh! Mr. B!"
Lizzy cried, "No! Don't chain him to me!"
Mr. B said, "No, no.
"I won't make Lizzy go.
"Can I have peace now in my library?"