3. (Trust, lies and old fears)

A/N: Hey guys, sorry for the late update! And i promised longer chapters, didn't i? :) Maybe everything is happening very fast in this chapter and/or you don't like how the story turns out so you close this FF and never come back again, but I would be so happy if you give it a try :)

Disclaimer: The characters belong to Cassandra Clare and the writing stile is inspired by Jewels4's!

Thanks to my betas Lou and Kate (links to their perfections on my profile!)


Cecily never really believed that a few words can change a life. But now, looking back at what happened, she needed to admit that these few words form Gabriel, a practically stranger back there, changed her life.

When he said this little sentence to her, she didn't understand at first.

"What do you mean? They haven't found the body?!"

"I called the police and they drove to the crime scene. But when they get there, the didn't find the dead man. There was nothing, not even a drop of blood…"

"I… I don't… How?"

The girls mind tried to understand what the words that came out of Gabriel's mouth meant. She turned the words around, examining them from all sides. But they didn't make any sense. She had seen the dead body. All the blood. The man's mouth hanging open.

And now, the Lightwood boy told her that the police hadn't found a body? Not even blood?

"The murderer must have came back, removed the body and cleaned the place… The police won't believe us, Cecily!"

His voice came out like a whisper. When she looked at Gabriel's incredible green eyes she thought she was seeing a little boy and not a 21-year old man. And she understood his feelings. All the confusion. The fear. The panic. Cecily understood because she felt the same.

They had seen a dead man. A man who had family. Friends. And now he was gone. Someone took control of his life and just killed him.

What if it had been somebody she knew. Cecily thought about it over and over. What if it had been Will. Or her parents. Fanny…

"No, no, no, not again!", Cecily thought. She couldn't lose herself in the dark thoughts. Not again.

They had seen such a terrible thing at a young age. And now, nobody believed them. There was nobody who could arrest the murderer. And the family of the man would live without acknowledging what had happened to him. Life isn't fair.

What now? What if the slayer had seen their faces. What if he recognised them?

They were alone on this. The weight of a life lay on their shoulders. Would they be in danger? Would the man try to kill them? Would-…

Cecily cut off her thoughts. She needed to try to forget for a while, till she could think clear again.

Her heart pounded on her chest as she took a deep breath. Hadn't enough bad things happened in her life?!

She wrapped her arms around her body, as if she needed to hold herself, or she would break into thousand peaces. Her eyes stared at something only she could see, as she tried not to cry.

Suddenly she felt a hot breath against her neck and a hand was on her shoulder.

"Get some rest, you need it. Your body needs to heal", Gabriel said.

Cecily lied back on the bed. She felt tired again. And she knew that even in her dreams reality would come after her.

"What are we going to do?"

Before Gabriel could answer her question the door flew open and Will Herondale came in.

He looked worried but as he saw Gabriel next to Cecily his expression turned angry.

"Hands off my sister, Lightworm!", he snapped.

Gabriel's eyes darkened and for a moment he looked like he would respond, but he turned around and left the room quietly.

Will went to his sister and stroked her raven black hair.

"What happened to you?"

His voice was tiny and worried. Cecily knew why. She was sure she scared he brother to death when the hospital called to tell him that she was injured. It wouldn't have been the fist time Will needed to visit a sister in the hospital.

Her gaze was still fixed at the door where Gabriel left as she said her next words.

"I tripped and fell. Nothing to worry about."

After Cecily Herondale managed to persuade the doctors that she was okay, Will drove her home. As they drove out of London, where the landscape became more and more greener, Cecily felt a little happier. There was not a place like home. Even if their new house wasn't as precious as their old one, it was still home.

For most people, home would be a place of peace. Not for Cecily.

"There is no peaceful place for a Herondale. Not in this world", the girl thought bitterly.

Home was a place where she could close her eyes without fearing a nightmare. Where she could have some happy moments.

After what happened to Ella… The girl quickly ended the thought. She wouldn't think about Ella, not today. Seeing Will at school everyday was hard enough.

"I'm a strong, gown-up girl", Cecily whispered to herself.

"Yes, you are!"

Surprised the girl looked at her brother. Cecily hadn't thought that Will could hear her, but Will had excellent ears. Her brother looked at her with the same, dark blue eyes as hers. And she knew that he had the same thoughts.

"Please, Will, come home!"

Her voice was nothing more than a whisper, a breath of wind. He looked away from her, but not fast enough that she couldn't see the pain in his eyes. Will's gaze was fixed on the highway and a few seconds passed before he answered.

"This isn't my home. Not any more My home is my flat in London."

"Liar!", Cecily shouted.

She couldn't stop herself. It was like a game to them both, everyone follows the same steps again and again. But Cecily couldn't just stop trying.

"I'm not lying, Cecily!"

Will's voice was tensed and so was his body. He tried his best to control his emotions but Will never had been good at it.

As Cecily saw he brother like this her voice softened.

"Home is, where your heart belongs, Will. I know you are lying."

Seconds passed as they drove in silence. It got dark and the car lights were like stars on the highway.

"Then, Cecily, my heart doesn't belong there!"


Gabriel Lightwood opened the door to the flat. It belonged to him, Tom and George. They knew each other since they were kids, because their parents belonged to the same group of friends. When they went to collage they decided that they had enough from their old people and bought this flat.

"Anybody here? Guys, you won't believe what happened to me!", Gabriel shouted.

The messy, curly brown haired head from George appeared from the kitchen.

"What?", he asked and took a bit of the sandwich in his hand.

Gabriel went to the couch and fell on it.

"Where is Tom?", he asked and closed his eyes.

As something heavy landed on his belly he knew the answer.

"Get off of me, you git!", the Lightwood grunted and tried to push the body off him.

Tom just laughed and took the sandwich out of Georges hand.

"Aw, someone missed me!"

"Yeah sure, you pain in the arse!"

The answer was another laugh but Tom finally moved and sat on the floor before Gabriel. After George managed to get his sandwich back and the boys were quiet Gabriel took a deep breath.

"Man, I wish I had gone to the gym with you guys! Then nothing would have happened!"

Slowly he told them the hole story, from the beginning in the dark street till the hospital.

For a second Gabriel thought not telling his friends wouldn't be bad. They were his best friends and he trusted them blind.

We can't change the past and it a good thing, because every good and bad choice brings us where we are. So maybe if Gabriel hadn't been so loyal and told his friends, the whole story would have been a little bit different. But we shouldn't spend our whole life in the past, we should life now, in the presents.

What Gabriel didn't know was that one shouldn't trust easily. But at this point of the story, Gabriel trusted too easily. He wanted to trust someone, he needed someone he could tell everything to.

So he sat there and told them everything what had happened.


What is a lie? When you tell someone something that isn't true? Is it a lie when you just don't tell some parts of the truth? Every person defines the word differently.

But is it a lie if you tell one to protect someone? Can lies be good?

Cecily Herondale didn't know. She just knew that she lied to her brother to protect him. To keep him, if the situation turned out bad, safe. But she hated lying. Cecily believed that if someone asked somebody a question, one must reply with the truth. So she told the truth almost always.

But she didn't tell the truth to Will.

Lies are difficult to understand. You can build on them but they can also destroy everything. How different would the world be if all people would be honest?

"Damn it", Cecily muttered.

She fell on her bed, face first. Her parents weren't home when she arrived so she hadn't faced them yet. Linette and Edmund Herondale, her parents, where still working.

Like always, Cecily thought.

They both worked a lot and where barely home during the week. Cecily knew the reasons why.

The girl groaned. Her head ached and she was tired but still couldn't sleep. The medicine had faded and her hole body felt like she had run a marathon.

When her phone rang, Cecily ignored it and shut her eyes. After the second time someone called her, she angrily picked it up.

"Who is stupid enough to upset me in such an awful mood?"

"Hello sunshine, I'm fine, thank you for asking", a familiar, female voice said.

"Oi Fanny, sorry I just have the worst headache!", Cecily said, a lot friendlier now, to her best friend.

Phone still on her ear, she sat up in her bad and looked on her watch. 8:38.

"So, darling, I heard you had a very interesting time today…"

The way Fanny Greymark said the word, with amusement and like she knew something, made Cecily shiver.

"What do you mean? What have you heard?"

"Well, I heard that our little queen went to the hospital. And the interesting fact is, that no one less than Gabriel Lightwood brought you there. The rumours are a little bit split up between you being the new dream couple of the school or him hurting you to revenge on Will for the fight earlier today. But I know you and I don't believe anything about that, hun. So tell me, what happened really?"

For a moment Cecily considered telling Fanny the truth. She was her best friend and they never kept secrets from each other. They shared everything. But for what price?

"I kind of tripped and fell. Gabriel was fortunately also there so he brought me to hospital. I still don't know why, the injury wasn't that bad. He seemed a little bit overprotecting. Whatever. Can I copy your notes? I didn't get what your dear professor was talking about, like always."

Cecily tried to keep her voice calm like nothing happened and she was just bored of the conversation. But Fanny Greymark knew her too well.

"Yeah, don't try to get away from this topic. I know you too well for your own good and you will me tell me more about your Lightwood boy", her voice was full of humour and Cecily groaned.

"First of all, he isn't my Lightwood boy. I don't even know him. He seems nice and I don't really get why my brother hates him. Anything else you would like to know?" "Oh dear, you are forgettin that he is really, and I mean really, really handsome! Don't tell me you haven't noticed!"

"Yes, OK he is really handsome. But now shut up!"

Fanny's answer was only a new wave of laughter.

Sleeping is a nice thing. You lay in a comfortable bed and you can shut out the world for a moment. In your dreams you can imagine wonderful, better things. But sadly, the only dreams you can remember are often nightmares. And while you are asleep time flows by and when you wake up, another day is here. Another change. A day full of new decisions you need to make, without knowing what they will bring you.

But before you fall asleep, there is this time when you lay in your bed and try to shut your eyes, but to many thoughts are in your mind. Dark thoughts. Thoughts about life. About death.

And sometimes when the thoughts are unusual dark and strong, they weave a bound to reality. Not even in your dreams you can escape from the fear and angst. You are bounded to these thoughts and in worst case, you can't even fall asleep. A living nightmare, trapped in reality.

This happened to Cecily Herondale on these night of the 17th of February. Her blue eyes were wide open, as horrible pictures flew around in her mind. And she really tried to sleep. But every time she closed her eyes and sunk into the darkness, reality crashed against her inner eyes, like water on a ship, trying to find a way deeper inside. So with a groan, Cecily opened her eyes again and looked at the ceiling as time passed by.

Hours later, at the college building, the girl walked slowly against the storm of people to her classroom. She fell on a seat at the back of the room, dropped her bag next to her and pulled up the hood of her sweater. Head down on the desk, she hoped for the hour to be over soon.

Cecily didn't get anything from this lesson. She really tried to listen, but tiredness overcame her. Her body hurt and so did her soul, and the worst thing was, that she couldn't speak to anyone. Or at least, the only person she could talk to was a stranger.


Somehow Cecily managed to get through the school day. Gladly she hadn't a long school day today, so at three afternoon she was on her way home. She had parked her car a few streets away, since all the parking spots for the college had been taken.

This was why she walked alone to her car. The streets were empty and a breath of wind let Cecily shiver. She could already see her car, with it's bright red colour, at the end of the street.

Suddenly, there was a noise behind her and the girl jumped around. Her heart pounded inside her chest and she breathed hard. But there was no one.

"Probably only a cat. Or the wind", Cecily tried to calm herself. There was this noise again. This time, closer. Her survival instincts kicked in and before she realised what she was doing, she ran to her car.

Bump. Bump. Bump.

The only noise she could hear were her footsteps on the ground. Still, she couldn't shake off the feeling that someone was hunting her. The sun was behind a building and the place was covered in shadows. There was no breeze of wind, no birds singing. It was as if the world was holding its breath to see what will happen next.

Out of the blue, two hands grabbed Cecily and pull her into a dark room. A hand covered her mouth and the other pressed her against the wall. The cold of the stones soaked through her clothes to her skin and she broke out in cold sweat.

She was about to start screaming and kicking, as she felt a breath against her ear.

"It's me. Gabriel. Please be quiet!"

The girl relaxed a little and the hand disappeared from her mouth. A moment later, Cecily saw the reason why Gabriel hid her. A tall, athletic man ran out of where she came. He wore black jogging pants, trainers and a black sweater with a sign on them. The hood was on his head and his eyes were behind big, black sunglasses so you couldn't make out his features.

He stopped right next to Cecily's car and looked around. After a while he seemed to get uncomfortable and checked out the number plate. In their stash, the girls eyes widened.

Cecily didn't know how long she stood there, not moving and Gabriel breathing next to her. Finally, after what felt like hours, the guy looked around for the last time and then started jogging down the street. They waited a few minutes after he disappeared to be sure, before they left the doorway.

The girl wanted to go to her car but the boy grabbed her hand and pulled her with him. Quickly, Gabriel took Cecily to the next door, a café.

There were only a few other people inside, an old man with a cowboy hat, another young student who was reading a book and a woman with her little boy. Nobody talked and the only noises were the heater and a radio from the kitchen. A few lamps emitted a yellowish light and the seats were scuffed but all in all the place wasn't bad. The waitress, a dark haired woman around 30, cleaned glasses as the students entered. With tired eyes she watched them sit on the table in the corner of the room.

The adrenaline in Cecily's and Gabriel's blood was gone and the girl buried her face in her hands as they sat down. Gabriel didn't know what to do with this situation, if he should comfort her or let her alone. Unsure he rubbed his chin and was about to stroke her black hair to make her feel better, as the waitress came to her table. The woman pulled out a pad and a pencil. Without saying a word, she waited for their order.

With an unreadable expression Cecily lifted her head and smoothed her clothes.

"Just a coffee, please. Black", she ordered.

The woman nodded and turned to Gabriel and fixed him with her eyes.

"Uhm, what would you suggest?"

After a moment of thinking, the waitress answered bored. "Well, we have the best chocolate cake in London."

"OK, then I'll take one for me and one for the lady here", he said, now smiling.

Before Cecily could protest, the female went away.

"Did you see her creepy stare? I fought she wanted to eat me for her next meal!", the boy whispered with a fake shocked face.

The young Herondale could only roll her eyes. "Stop being a twat! And secondly, I don't want a chocolate cake. Don't order for me, I'm not a helpless little girl!"

Gabriel leaned back, a grin on his lips. "Well, apparently you are a girl and to me you are little. And helpless-"

"Don't you dare finish this statement!", the girl said coldly, in her eyes no sign of friendliness.

The boy shrugged and looked at his fingers. Awkward silence settled between them till the food and coffee came.

Carefully, Cecily eyed the chocolate cake and took a piece with the fork. Chocolate sauce ran down the cake and the girl had to admit, that it smelled delicious. The chocolate cake was sweet and soft and practically melted on Cecily's tongue.

"Oh, dear Lord, this is really the best chocolate cake I've ever eaten! Thanks for ordering, Lightwood", the girl groaned and took another piece.

As she looked up, she found Gabriel watching at her smiling, his cake untouched.

"Really, try this, it's like a piece of heaven!"

"I just wanted to see your expression. So you take it back? Reprimanding me for ordering it?", the boy smiled.

Cecily blushed a little and muttered a 'sorry'. She didn't like to be reminded that she made mistakes, but if she had, she would apologise.

After they were both finished and filled with chocolate, Gabriel laid down his fork, now serious.

"We need to talk!"

"You know, this would sound like a break up line if we were together."

The boy shot her a look but couldn't hide his smile. "Whatever. First of all, you shouldn't get to your car again next time. I think the… uhm… murderer… saw you in your car driving away from the hospital. We need to be more careful!"

Cecily nodded. She had already thought about this, and there was a horrible thought in her mind.

"Do you… Do you think he knows were we go to college? If yes, will he attack us there?", she asked scared.

There weren't a lot of things in the world that could scare Cecily Herondale. But the fact that a killer could hunt them and they weren't safe any more, not even at their school, terrified her. Most of all, she was scared that her friends-that Fanny-could be in danger. Loyalty was one of Cecily's greatest characteristics. But it was also one of her most fatal flaws.

But to her relief the boy shook his head. "No, I don't think so. Or at least I hope not. But no, I don't think he would take the risk to attack as at college, not in front of all the people. Still, we shouldn't be alone. Let's just hope the murderer doesn't want to take the risk and just… leaves us alone."

They discussed a few things, how they could stay safe. While they talked, Gabriel noticed a few things about Cecily Herondale. On the first look, she seemed like a calm person but after a while he was aware of little habits, which showed that she was nervous. Her eyes travelled around and she didn't look at a point longer than a few seconds. Another sign was her fingers: she either pounded on the wooden table or she swept her hair back. After she stroked her hair for the twelfth time in one minute, Gabriel caught her arm mid-air.

"Stop it, please. It's a bit annoying."

The Herondale shot him a cold glaze and than looked at her arm. The boy had forgotten that he was still holding it and he let go of her immediately.

"You just stroke your hair back every two seconds", he muttered an explanation under his breath.

Cecily looked at him confused but didn't ask.

"So,.. ehrm… are you often alone at home?", Gabriel tried to change the topic.

After a moment of thinking, Cecily answered. "Yes, I am. This may sound weird to you, but my parents work a lot, even on the weekends. Since there aren't neighbours near, nobody would notice if I got attacked."

Her voice was calm, as if they talked about random things like the weather. A cold shiver ran down Gabriel's back. Even if they called it 'attack' they both know there was a rare chance of survivor if they got 'attacked'.

"This will surprise you, but I understand."

As he saw Cecily's face he quickly explained.

"I mean, I can understand that with your parents. My dad also works a lot and is barley at home."

His jaw tensed as he talked about his family and Cecily was clever enough to not ask any questions. She knew this expression from Will, when somebody asked them about their family. But what reason had Gabriel to feel uncomfortable about his family? The girl stifled her curiosity because she knew the boy wouldn't say anything more and she didn't want to push him.

"So, what are we going to do?"

Playing with her empty cup, Cecily looked at Gabriel and waited for his response. His green eyes were dark and she imaged that in his head he worked hard on an idea. A few minutes of silence passed and Cecily could feel her thoughts drifting away, as a bright smile appeared on Gabriel's face.

"OK, this isn't a good sign and whatever the idea is, no!"

"Oi, come on, you haven't even heard what I wanted to say!"

"But I know this expression. Will had it on often and one of these ideas ended up with the hole kitchen flooded! So, no way!"

The boy was still smiling and Cecily had the urge to punch it out of his face. They stared at each other, till the girl's curiosity took over.

"OK, it might be good if you told me what you were thinking about, so I can make a plan which is the opposite of it!", she muttered not looking at his face.

The boy laughed.

This was the one of many little battles they would have. This was the first of a lot Cecily would lose. But she would win a lot more. They would fight over little things and keep quiet about big ones. They would learn to enjoy these little fights, if they didn't already. They would deny the truth and tell lies. Fighting, they would get to know each other. They would find a routine in these fights. This fights would keep them up. But would they keep them alive?

"Fact is, that you can't continue living at your home, not when you are alone there. Moving in my flat isn't an option either. We don't have another room for you, expect if you want to share a bed with one of us", he smirked at her while saying this and Cecily could feel her cheeks heat up, " But, I know someone who has a big flat with enough space and doesn't need it. Someone who has enough place where I could teach you self-defence. A place where we could move in till things are better!"

Cecily Herondale wanted to argue about it, that she would never move to a flat with a stranger, but she could see his point.

If Cecily Herondale had decided to stay at the Herondale house, a lot of things wouldn't have happened. But maybe she would be dead, murdered while she was alone at home. Maybe things would have hurt less.


To Thalia:Thank you very much for your Review! I'm glad you like(d) my story and no, I don't have some special time where I update (sorry for taking so long again). I just write a chapter and then give it to my betas. Thank you so much for the compliment and I don't think you are a "bad" writer. I don't think such thing as "bad writers" exist. Like everything else you need to practice. Read a lot of stories and look how the writing style of the author is. I got very inspired by "The Live and Times" written by Jewels5... If anything else you want to know or chat, just PM me or ask me on my tumblr, i promise i don't bite :)

I wrote you a story, you own me a review:) Jk you own me nothing. But a review would be nice.