I sighed. My throat was killing me as I hadn't had water for God knows how long and I was still shackled to this damned chair! "I swear, everything has teamed up with Mr. Tree..." I mumbled. "Uh - but not you Mr. Door!" I said quickly. I didn't want to offend my only ally in this place.

It's ok, I'm not offended, Mr. Door would have said if he could talk. I sighed again. "Really? Thank god for that!" I said in relief. Ok, I was going a bit crazy, but don't tell me you wouldn't get bored if you were in the same position for ages!

But there were a few things confusing me in this situation:

One, why would you even place a thirteen year old in an interrogation room in the first place? Two, why am I in frikken' Japan of all places? Three, why the hell amn't I hungry? I had been in here for a day, maybe, but I didn't even feel the slightest bit hungry, or felt the need to go toilet. It was so confusing.

I swung my feet to and fro, as they barely even brushed the ground, and began humming to myself. "The islands in the east are warm...Paina-purupuru...Their heads get really hot...And they're all idiots..."

My voice echoed back at me, the only sound in this damned place. My eye twitched. "HEEYYYYYY! GET ME OUT OF HERE! I HAVEN'T BURNT DOWN ANYTHING IN AGES, I SWEAR...YOU CAN'T PROVE ANYTHING!" I screamed...which only hurt my throat even more.

I rubbed my aching throat, frowning. What was I supposed to do? I had befriended Mr. Door, wasn't that the test? "Urrghhh..." I groaned. I felt like a zombie!


(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)


The Hokage's day had certainly been weird. First, that shock wave, then the body of a girl, then Kakashi reporting how the girl was walking around somehow. But one thing Kakashi had said kept replaying itself in his mind.

"I had checked her wrist for a pulse, Hokage-sama, but there wasn't any and her skin was ice-cold. She is literally a dead body walking."

And seeing as she didn't have any chakra networks to speak of, she wasn't an Edo Tensei summoning, as the summoner would use the soul of someone who could use jutsu.

Then why is she alive? He pondered. Or, how was she alive - if you could even call it being alive. The medics had informed him that she had several injuries: her ribs were cracked and her arms had several torn muscles and ligaments in them, as well as her legs. They had fixed the body up to the best of their abilities, but they weren't able to fix some vital organs, like her heart or stomach, which remained in pieces, apparently.

Currently, the girl was being held in one of the interrogation rooms. Ibiki had mildly interrogated her (only one scalpel - it was an accomplishment for Ibiki not to permanently scar someone...) and found that she wasn't an enemy kunoichi and from a place called "Are land*".

Honestly, if it wasn't for the whole 'zombie-person-who-shouldn't-be-moving' thing he would just wait for her to get better and let her stay as a civilian (wouldn't want her to get captured and tortured for information by enemy shinobi, now) but he couldn't.

It was, as Shikaku would say, troublesome. Based on all of the information Ibiki and Kakashi had gathered, the girl had no chakra, didn't even know what chakra was, and wasn't from any of the five great nations - Ibiki would know if she lied, he was an expert. Maybe she was from one of those Western countries? But they hadn't had contact in centuries, and she knew the language...**

He sighed. This was giving him a headache! What was he to do? Some of the medics were itching to run tests on the girl, seeing as she was a medical miracle, but that would be unfair to her. She was young, as young as a genin, and it'd be cruel to force her through tests like a lab rat.

Maybe he should place her under watch - yet the girl certainly wasn't a threat to the village so it would be a waste of ANBU... Well, they would definitely have to found out how she was moving, although not through tests, but how?

Maybe she is some form of experiment...? Like a mutation of the Edo Tensei jutsu? He pondered. He wouldn't put it past Orochimaru to force some poor child's soul into a body with no chakra coils. So we'd have to keep an eye on her, in case she is bound to Orochimaru's will like normal Edo Tensei summons and attacks someone. We'd need someone capable of keeping her under check if she does go crazy... He sighed. That poor poor girl.

"ANBU." The Hokage called, and a bird-mask wearing ANBU appeared. "Can you fetch the messenger hawk?" "Hai." With that, the ANBU flashed away. Hiruzen pulled out a scroll, a brush and an ink pot.

'Dear Maito Gai...'

The Sandaime sighed again, an action that was becoming a bad habit. That poor girl would have to endure the Flames of Youth...


(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)


I let out a low groan. There was nothing to do in this place! It was frikken' spotless, and other than the table, chair and myself there was nothing! Nothing! Mr. Door had been giving me the cold shoulder after I tried flirting with him (could have sworn I had muffled laughter coming from behind one of those walls) and now I was attempting to beat box. Although that was rather hard seeing as how I had to lean down to get my fist to my mouth, and the sound came out rather muffled.

After my third attempt, I gave up. "I'm going crazy in here!" I moaned. "Talking to doors, hearing things...Honestly, just give me some coffee! It's all I wanted~" My head slumped forward. Might as well take a quick nap right?

But fate seemed to hate me - or love me, it was hard to tell - and the sound of Mr. Door opening brought me back to my senses, and I raised my head excitedly. "Mr Door, have you decided to accept my lo-oove?" My voice trailed off as I was met with the sight of an old man who was flanked by two mask-wearing guards.

"...I've been expecting you, Mr. Bond," I said in my best villain voice. The man just chuckled! "So are you here to tell me that I'm not from Ireland again and throw pointy things at me?" I asked wearily. I've learned that you can never ever trust old men - they're either freakishly strong like Bumi or creepy kidnappers!

"No, I'm afraid not," he said, smiling. "ANBU?" He said suddenly. The two men - women maybe, I couldn't tell - disappeared, and suddenly my wrists were free. I stood up, stiff from sitting there for ages, and muttered a few curses as my ribs ached.

"Follow us." I squeaked and spun around - the two mask fetish people were behind me! Stupid magicians, always magicking behind me! They stared at me indifferently as I shuffled backwards, keeping my eyes on them. Maybe they were Weeping Angels? I blinked, and they were still there. I let out a sigh of relief.

"I would not have been able to handle Weeping Angels!" I said as I pivoted on my heel to face the old man - and the guards. "Eh-?" I looked behind me, and the guards were gone. "Fricken' magicians..." I mumbled under my breath.

"Come," the old man said, and walked out of this room, while the guards remained impassive. To stop me attacking the old man from behind, I suppose. I shuffled after him, weary of my ribs hurting me again.

We walked in silence down the corridor, until we reached the stairwell. "Aww, what? We're gonna have to climb all of these stairs? Seriously? That's so gay..." I moaned. I didn't fancy the idea of aggravating my injuries anymore than they already were, thanks.

"Are you tired already? And you're younger than me!" The man laughed. "N-No...pfft...this is nothing.." I mumbled. Oh god, you know you're pathetic when you get given out to by old men!

I walked behind the old man on the staircase, leaning heavily on the banister. Each step jarred my ribs and made me wince. I glared at the sign that was mocking me. 5 more flights to go...

"Hey, what's your name then?" I asked to break the silence. "Hmm? I'm Sarutobi Hiruzen, and you, young lady?" Replied..Hiruzen. Ha! Silly people, thinking you can fool me with your weird way of talking! "I'm Ryder Flynn." I said.

"Ryder Flynn eh?" Old man Hiruzen seemed confused. "That's a strange name - you're definitely not from around here are you?" I rolled my eyes. "As I have stated before, no, I'm not from Japan. Although it's not really a common name in Ireland either..." I mused.

After what felt like an hour we reached the lobby of the building I was in. It was pretty plain, barely any furnishings. Well, I don't think torture was supposed to be comfortable...

A billowing tent/coat caught my attention. No way...is that-? I spun around, grinning like a mad man. I waved my hand enthusiastically. "Hey! Scar-y! It's me!" I called. He twitched visibly, turning his head around enough to glare at me. And walked on. The bastard ignored me!

Attempting to hold back my pout - and failing - I followed Old man Hiruzen out of the... I looked around for a sign. Where was I anyway? I saw a sign - that was in Japanese. Great! Just great - I'm stuck in a place I don't know, with people who like to mess with me, and I can't even tell where I'm going!

I huffed. Shit! I jogged to catch up with Hiruzen who had walked off without me - probably forgot about me, senile old man - and walked quietly behind him, enjoying the feeling of the sun on my back instead of constant downpour.

"So where are we anyway?" I asked, breaking the silence again. Old man Hiruzen stopped, blinking at me incredulously. "You...don't know?" He asked, eyebrow raised. "Even though we came out of 'Konoha's Intelligence and Torture Building'?" I felt sweat drip down my neck. So...I was being...mindfucked - erm, tortured? Konoha...? Wha- oh right, Japan...Oh gods, I have to bullshit! "Well, um...I-I'm kind of embarrassed to admit, but I'm..um...dyslexic," I lied, blushing out of nerves and scratching my head. I just hoped I resembled an embarrassed girl - would I fool him?

"Oh, well why didn't you say so?" Hiruzen laughed. "Sorry, you're in Konohagakure, in Hi no Kuni." "Konohagu-Konagak-Konoha?" I stuttered, shit was hard to pronounce. He nodded. "Yes, the Village Hidden in the Leaves, one of the five great nations."

"Oh, Scar-y mentioned those! Um...Iwan and Kira?" I piped up, trying to remember the other countries Scar-y mentioned. Hiruzen nodded again, smiling at my attempt. "There is Iwagakure, Kirigakure, Sunagakure, Konohagakure and Kumogakure, the five Hidden Villages, and other countries too." He told me. I went through the information in my head, realizing that he hadn't told me anything I could use to possibly harm anyone - smart man.

Of course, I could hardly blow up these 'gakures' now could I?

While the thought was amusing, I wouldn't want to become the Osama Bin Laden of Konoha, having the FBI breaking into my place while I'm eating my cookies. Illegally hoarded, of course, but cookies nonetheless.

Ah, I was going too far into this wasn't I? My gaze eventually wandered from the very interesting back of one Old Man Hiruzen, and to the shops that surrounded us on both sides. There were bakeries, selling pastries I had never seen before (I saw colourful balls on a stick...I must try it!) and others that were weapon shops, apparently, if the weird knife things, throwing-stars, swords and whatnot were anything to go by.

So...This place has weapons and an Interrogation Centre, presumably a military force in Konoha then. And most likely in the other gakures too. These Five Great Nations - what made them great? Size? Hardly. So it would have to be something impressive, something that would rank it higher on the danger scale... I gulped, one conversation with Scar-y in mind.

'What kind of accident then? Found out by our ninja?'

Oh yes. Ninjas. Those tended to be dangerous... But it was bullshit! Ninja didn't exist! There were hardly nations of ninja now - were there? No, I told myself firmly, you're just thinking too far into things! Sure, they have weapon shops and they probably have armies, but that - ninja? Is that the best you could come up with now?

I eyed Hiruzen in front of me. I would have to ask him if I wanted answers, but that could wait. "Yo, Old Man Hiruzen!" I called, causing him to look at me over his shoulder...while still walking and managing not to crash into anything. Everyone in this place had that special ability! I'd probably trip over nothing - hell, I do that even with both eyes ahead of me.

"Where are we going?" I asked. This caused him to hum in thought and face forward again. I waited for his answer; I could be patient sometimes. "Well, there are certain...things, we need to check out, Flynn-san, so I'm placing you on a squad with one of our jounin, and we're going to the meeting place now," he replied.

"Hm...Okay!" I chirped, finding no flawed reasoning behind that. I mean, strange girl gets dragged of to T&I? Place her under watch! Yes, I did know I was being placed under watch, but I couldn't see the reason why, actually. I mean, was Konoha just paranoid or was there another factor I was missing? I was only thirteen for god's sake, what could I do?

After another few minutes, we reached an empty enough space, with worn looking targets and dummies here and there, fenced off with mesh wire and a sign with "22" on it, and some kanji. Must be a training ground or something, I reckoned.

And when I say empty enough, I mean four other people stood in the middle. One was the tallest, a man...with a monstrosity of a haircut...with a leotard? And there seemed to be a mini-monster beside him, looking identical down to those fuzzy eyebrows.

There was a girl too, to my relief, with two buns and boyish enough clothes. I decided I liked her on the spot. And then there was another...girl? Boy? Okama? With these weird ass eyes, he looked blind! But if how he was glaring at the Green Beast duo was any sign, he wasn't. But his hair... Oh my god it looked really soft!

I suppose, eventually, they had stopped their bickering (as mini-green beast was yelling something happily to Princess boy) as they had heard our approach. "Team Gai," Old Man Hiruzen greeted. "Hokage-sama," the four chorused back at him, and I could feel their gazes and they stared at me. I stared back.

"Ah, Hokage-sama! So this is the youthful girl you were telling me about?" Green Beast mega asked...declared? It felt like a declaration. Hell, his teeth even sparkled. More life hax I suppose.

"Indeed she is, Gai. Ryder Flynn, meet Maito Gai-" He gestured to Green Beast mega, who struck a pose, "-Rock Lee-" He gestured to mini-Green Beast, who took up the same pose as his Mega, "-Hyuuga Neji-" Princess boy stared at me impassively, "-and Tenten." He finished, pointing to the girl, who smiled and waved at me. I waved back, grinning. "Team Gai, meet Ryder Flynn."

"Yo." That was my greeting. In an instant, my sight was blocked by eyebrows. "Yosh! Let us run one thousand laps around the Village and let our flames of youth burn bright! " He declared passionately. I took a step back, bracing myself from the crazy. "Yeah, sounds great, but no," I declined quickly.

Tenten glared at Lee, whacking him over the back of the head. "No need to scare her Lee!" She reprimanded. I grinned at her. "I like you!" I told her, to which she smiled at. "Likewise." I looked over at Princess boy. "Hi!" I greeted, only to meet a cold stare.

"Oh-Oh ok then, teaming up with Mr. Door are you! I swear everything here's against me..." I grumbled, causing Princess to give me a weird look - while still looking angry - and Lee and Gai to laugh. I repressed a shudder - Oh lord those laughs were terrifying.

"I will leave it to you Gai," Hiruzen smiled, shuffling off to do whatever old men do, I suppose. There was about a second of awkward silence before Gai's booming laughter rang out. "Flynn-chan! Let us run twenty warm-up laps around Konoha in the name of youth!" He cried, and I shook my head furiously.

"Oh hell naw, I'm - I'm allergic to exercise - no, what are you doi- no don't drag me into this no no what are you I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON MY SIDE AAAGHHH!"


(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)


I collapsed, panting like a dog on the ground after about 10 laps. I liked to think I had stamina - some at least - but really...that Monster Duo were terrifying! They were on their thirty something-th lap while I was on my seventh. Either they were amazingly fast, or I was slower than I thought. I was leaning towards the former.

I moaned as my body ached all over, my ribs not the only part of my body hurting like hell now. Hurray. But what was worse was that it was going to be so much more painful tomorrow. Curse you Gai and your youth! I swear I was going to have nightmares of green spandex and eyebrows.

I rolled over onto my front, pushing myself up onto my knees with sore arms. I frowned. Surely my arms shouldn't hurt that much? It wasn't like I was walking on my hands... The screams of youth and to green blurs passing by me drew my attention. ...like the Monster Duo.

Maybe now I could go home and sleep, have a shower? I froze were I sat. Shit - I didn't exactly have a home here did I? Where was I going to sleep? I thought hard about that.

The Monster Duo were out of the question, they probably sleep-youth. Princess boy...if the glares I received from him were anything to go by, he didn't exactly want to get friendly with me. Tenten maybe? She seemed more plausible, being the only sane one here and a girl too. Ah, but I've just met her! Just explain your situation to her, I'm sure she'll understand, some voice at the back of my head said. I scoffed mentally.

'Hello! Yes I may only have known you for a few hours, but can I crash here for tonight?'

No way! So where -? An image of a certain friendly orange-menace sprang to mind. Naruto! Naruto wouldn't mind, Naruto was chill. With that in mind, I got up and hollered over my shoulder, "See ya tomorrow!" before walking (read: limping) off towards the vague direction where I was pretty sure Naruto lived. Maybe. Hopefully.

It was evening time and the setting sun was casting oranges and reds into the sky. It was pretty. There was less children running about now, and a few adults picking up some last-minute groceries, while I walked through the village towards my showe-Naruto. It was nice, peaceful.

I let out a sigh of relief as the rickety apartment came into view. I dragged my ass up the stairs and knocked on his door. It was flung open immediately and I was squashed by orange. "Flynn-chan! I was so worried where were you why did sensei drag you off like that oh my god are you ok-" I flailed pathetically, managed to clip Naruto on the nose and shut him up. "Ca'-bre-he" I gasped, turning blue.

"Oh, sorry!" He yelped, dropping me like I was hot. I gasped for sweet sweet air and stood up once more. "Um.." I shuffled on my feet, running a hand through my hair which was like a bird's nest.

"C-Can I stay here -eh? I don't mean to intrude, I just don't have anywhere else to stay." I asked. Naruto blinked once, twice, then beamed. I swear the room grew a little brighter. "Sure Flynn-chan! I've got a futon here somewhere!" He grinned, and I smiled in relief. "Thanks mate," I said, and hugged him. Cause hugs are awesome, hugs are life, hugs are necessary. I like hugs.

I let go after a moment and stepped into his apartment, closing the door behind me. My eyes scanned the room, taking in the junk. Everywhere. "...nice place." I commented eventually. Naruto huffed. "Hey, I'm letting you stay here, you can't say anything."

I shrugged. "True." I agreed. "Stay right there!" He told me, and dashed off into another room, and I examined the one I was in. It was pretty bare for someone's home. Although most of the ground and tables were covered in empty ramen cups. Go figure, Naruto has a fetish for ramen.

I wandered off in the direction Naruto left in, and found myself in what was presumably his room. It was slightly neater than the room I just left: there was a poster with a funny looking symbol on it (weren't they on the bandana things people wore around here?) and on the bed-side table there was a picture of Duckbu- erm, Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto and Silver. They looked pretty happy in the picture - except for Duckbutt and Naruto who were glaring at each other.

Naruto finished setting up the futon beside me, blanket and all, and I grinned at him. "Thanks!" I said, and proceeded to belly-flop on this fluffy magical thing. "Eh, no problem," Naruto responded sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head.

"Hmm...what time is it?" I asked. Naruto glanced at the clock he had. "Half ten," he told me. I yawned. "Well, I normally go to bed around 11, sometimes 4, but today has been one of the weirdest and I'm surprised I'm still conscious." I told him.

After Naruto got dressed (I hid my head in my blanket, I was not a perv!) and turned the lights out, we sat in silence for a moment, before he asked, "Flynn-chan, where do you come from?" I blinked at the random question.

"Ah, a place full of wonder, magic, and non-stop rain," I drawled. "It's so boring there...nothing interesting ever happens..honestly..." My eyelids were beginning to droop. "Ehh...then finally...the most interesting thing...happened there...was..mmm..." I drew off into a slur, and gave into sleep. I didn't have to really tell my new friend that I may or may not have been on drugs and woke up on the wrong side of the world right?


(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)


Ok, generally, my dreams are pretty weird. Usually. But mostly smooth, and random, and...well, not this.

I was surrounded by stars. Every. Fucking. Where. These things were just twinkling and sparkling as if they were taunting me. There didn't seem to be a path under my feet, either, but when I took a step there was a ripple in the air, like I was walking on water.

Strange, this is the first time I dreamed about being Jesus.

Also, nothing seemed to be consistent. Instead of walking on a level surface, I would be walking up suddenly, but it wasn't like walking up a hill, more like being pulled upwards by something you couldn't feel. And I would go down suddenly, but I couldn't feel it, it felt like I was walking normally, and my surroundings just shifted up and down.

Where was I? I wasn't exactly unconscious, and I was very aware of my movements. 'Hello?' I tried to call out, but my mouth wouldn't move. And yet, the faintest echo could be heard. Strange.

Out of nowhere, chilling laughter rang out. It felt like it filled this entire void, and shook my to my core. 'Who's there?' I attempted screaming, but to no avail. The laughter just grew louder. In the distance, I could see something white. Something out of place with this dimension.

I kept walking at the same pace, but it seemed to rush up to me terrifyingly fast. I froze where I stood, and squeezed my eyes shut as it would obviously crash into me. Kind of like with the truck... I thought randomly.

When I didn't feel any pain one would feel when something crashed into you, I hesitantly opened my eyes. My mouth fell at the sight before me. The white thing I saw was a throne. Made out of pure white skulls, with chains wrapping around the structure. On top of it sat a terrifying...humanoid...giant..thing.

He was jet black with white highlights, like a skeleton. He had bone white hair which framed blood-red eyes which seemed to glow. He had blood which trickled down the chains, and a three-bladed scythe was resting on the side. His head was lying on one fist while the other was draped over the arm of the chair casually. He was smirking widely, sharp teeth glinting.

'Who...are you -eh?' I asked, but as my earlier attempts proved no sound came out, yet he seemed to smirk wider at my question.

"Foolish heathen!" His voice boomed, dark and malicious. "You may call me Kami-sama, or as my devoted followers call me...Jashin."


A/N: I'm sorry I took so long to upload...Please forgive me D: But here you go! Third chapter! And be honest, who knew that Jashin was coming up?

Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! Cookies for everyone! *rains cookies*

So, leave a comment on why you liked/hated it down below, I appreciate it a lot! :3

Ah...it is Monday tomorrow...kill me =.=

*Yes, that is how you pronounce Ireland. Some people pronounce it "I-are-lind" and it pisses me off for no reason...idk you can't judge me!...

** That shall be explained in good time!

Also, Mina'sMadness, does that answer your question? xD

R/R people! It gives me inspiration and rainbows and stuff! :3