Ulla-Natalya Alovskaya/Belarus-25

I, HeroinOfDarkness, do not own Hetalia or the producers.


Feliks was flying high. As the blonde skipped into his office, he couldn't help but think of all of the good luck he's been having. Clutching the two precious documents in his manicured hands, Feliks lets out a victorious laugh. "We did it!" He yelled out. "The rights to the worst show ever written and a contract signed by the worst director who ever lived. We're in business!"

Not a moment later, Toris entered the office with tomatoes stuffed in his suit, a flower crown on his head, and an empty champagne bottle in his hand. "And what a business!" the brunette exclaimed as he put the empty bottle down. "In the same day, I gave the Segried Oath, and found myself dancing in a conga line with a Prussian, a Spanaird and a very friendly Frenchman." After taking off the crown, Toris began removing the tomatoes from his coat and into a bowl, careful not to squish the red fruit. "Not to mention I've now been acquainted with a strange Italian."

"Speaking of which, what did Lovino say to you when he took you upstairs?"

"Well, er..."

~Earlier that day~

While everybody celebrated the new deal between Feliks and Lovi, the latter grabbed Toris by shoulder and hustled him upstairs and onto the roof. If you can even call it that. What lied on the roof was the most glorious garden Toris had ever seen. On one side, sat rows of rose bushes, all in full bloom. On the other side rested multiple fruits and vegetables that looked just about ready to eat. And instead of hard concrete, the floor had lush, green grass that looked comfortable enough to sleep on. If he didn't know any better, Toris would've assumed this was Nirvana.

"It's beautiful." Toris breathed out, completely entranced by the sight before him.

"Yep." The Italian replied as he trudged ahead of his guest. "Toris," he stated seriously. So seriously, it snapped Toris out of his trance. After making sure he had the Lithuanian's full attention, Lovino continued. "I may come from wealth, but that doesn't mean I didn't work hard to get where I am." After running his hand through his grape vines, the Italian picked a stem full of the precious fruit and handed some to his guest. "From what Feliks has told me about you, I assume you understand the value of hard work?"

Accepting the fruit, Toris offered Lovi a kind smile. "Yes sir, I do." He replied, which was quite the understatement, considering his current situation. But what does that have to do with anything? "And um, not to be rude, but why are you telling me this?" Why was he telling him this?

"Because, I wanted to make sure I am right to trust you." Lovino stated as he put a hand on Toris' shoulder and looking him dead in the eyes. "And now, I know I can."

"You trust me?"

"Yes." Lovi said with a genuine smile. "Because when I look into your eyes, I can see an honest man."

"T-thank you sir." Toris said both gratefully and guiltily. He was basically using him for quick profit, which the Lithuanian was most certainly not proud of. Lovino, though a little strange, seemed like a genuinely nice person.

"But be warned." The Italian stated solemnly, his smile now gone. "You may have my trust now, but if you ever do anything to cross me, you'll regret it." If the tightening Lovino's grip didn't raise concern in Toris, then you can sure bet that the seriousness in the Italian's eyes did. "And that is a promise I intend to keep."

"Y-yes sir."

"Good!" Lovino exclaimed as he put his arm around the brunette, leading him to a vegetable patch. "Now that we are properly acquainted, let me share with you my amazing tomatoes!"

"So, um, yea. He'll kill us if he finds out that we're only using him..." Toris stated as he nervously played with his tie.

'Yep,' Feliks thought to himself. 'Sounds like what Lovi would do.' Shrugging, Feliks quickly dismissed the thought. "Well, it's not easy being a Broadway producer." The blonde said as he poured champagne into two glasses before handing one to his partner. "But, together we'll make it." After clinking glasses with the brunette, Feliks downs his drink in one gulp. "Partners, Liet. And like, nothing or no one will tear us apart."

At that instant, before Toris could even take a sip of his drink, the front door swung open and in came the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. She had a slender figure, hidden beneath a dak blue coat, and had delicate looking skin, kinda like a china doll. Her long, platinum blonde hair was topped with a black bow and made her striking blue eyes pop. Eyes focusing on Feliks and Toris, the woman walked up to the pair, showing that she was slightly shorter than them. "Lucasiewicz and Laurinaitis?" She asked with a thick accent.

"Yes?" They answered, curious of why this woman was asking for them.

Seeig that she found who she was looking for, the woman gave them a curt nod. "Pryvitannie."

After a moment of looking a eachother in awkward silence, the two decided they had no idea what she said and turned to faced the woman in a confused matter. "What?"

"Hello." The woman clarified in English, her accent still lingering. "Casting today?"

Casting? Casting for what? After giving it some thought, Feliks suddenly realized what she was talking about. "Oh! Like, you mean for the play!" He exclaimed, mentally face-palming for forgetting so fast. But wait, didn't hey just barely begin their plan this morning? "Wow, news really travels fast!" Then again they do live in New York...

While his partner was in deep thought, Toris turned to the woman. "Oh, no, miss. We're not-"

Seeing what Toris was about to tell the woman, Feliks quickly dropped his thoughts and clamped his hand over the brunette's mouth. "Yes, we're casting." He said as he led a confused Toris away from the woman. "Like, we just began casting today!"

"We're casting?" Toris asked is partner skeptically. They haven't even gotten the funding yet or the final script for that matter.

"Yes, we're casting." The blonde yelled to his partner before leaning in to whisper. "Listen, just once, I want to see somebody on my couch who's under fifty." Turning around to face their guest, Feliks puts on a smile. "So, like, before we begin, would you mind telling us your name?"

"My name is Natalya Arlovskaya."

'Geez,' Feliks thought to himself. 'And I thought Liet's name was a mouthfull.' Not wanting to be rude to Natalya, Feliks just smiles. "Is that all?" He said in a lighthearted, joking way. But when Felik's cheeky smile was met with Natalya's bored expression, the taller blonde dropped the smile and nervously cleared his throat. 'Tough crowd...' He thought to himself as he tugged on his collar. "We'll just call you Natalya."

Content, Natalya just nods. "Would you like me to audition now?"

"Um, no actually," Toris said from behind Feliks. "That won't be nece-"

"Yes, it is nece." Feliks said rather abruptly, interrupting his partner yet again. Shooting Toris a look, the blonde mentally screamed 'roll with it!' to him. "Completely nece." Turning back to face Natalya, Feliks gives the woman a sweet smile. "Please, make audition. Make audition all over the office." Responding with yet another nod, (not much of a talker is she?) Natalya walked over to Feliks' piano and took out some sheets from her coat, carefully placing them over the ivory keys. "So like, what are you going to sing for us?" Feliks asked as he and Toris took a seat on his storage couch.

After fixing up her sheet music, the slavic blonde turned to face her hosts. "Well yesterday, when I was walking out of my Rolls Royce, a crazy man yelled at me from a window and that inspired me to write this song." Placing her slender fingers on the piano, Natalya played a few keys of her music, which oddly enough, continued even after she stopped and walked a good foot away from the piano.

"When you got it, flaunt it. Step right up and strut your stuff. People tell me modesty's a virtue, but in the theatre, modesty can hurt you. When you got, show it." She sang as she swiftly removed her coat, revealing the little black dress, and matching black scarf she had on underneath. Feliks couldn't help but smile at how much moxie this chick had, while Toris couldn't help but stare at how nicely that dress fit her. Walking over to the other side of the coach the producers were on, Natalya continued her song. "Show your assets, let them know you're proud. Your goodies, you must push. Stick out your chest, shake your tush. When you got it, shout it out loud."

"Now I shall dance." Natalya stated as she threw down her coat before wiggling her tush. Completely entranced the sight of Natalya shaking her "assets", Toris failed to notice the sly look that Feliks was shooting him.

Done with her dance, Natalya walked over to Feliks' desk and sat on it, crossing her legs. Not wanting to miss out on the action, both Toris and Feliks followed her and stood on both sides besides the slavic. Facing Feliks, Natalya continued. "When you got it, show it. Put your hidden treasures on display. Violinists love to play an E-string. But audiences really love a G-string." She sang as she abruptly turned to face Toris, who retreated along with Feliks away from the desk. "When you got it, shout it. Let the world hear what you're about. Clothes may make a man. All a girl needs is a tan. When you got it, let it hang out. Remember when I danced?" Natalya asked in her normal speaking tone.

"Yeah!"

"I shall dance again!" She exclaimed before jumping off of the desk and began dancing, shaking her body even more widely than before as she made her way to the sofa Feliks and Toris were siting on. After removing her scarf, the slavic wrapped it around Toris and sat up on the arm of the couch. "When I was just a little girl in Belarus, my older sister gave me this advice." She sang as she tapped on the Lithuanian's nose. "When nature blesses you from top to bottom. Show that top to bottom, don't think twice." After pushing herself away from Toris, much to his disappointment, Natalya continued her song with much more enthusiasm than she intended. "Don't think twice!"

"When you got it, share it!" She continued as she repositioned herself to behind the couch. "Let the public feast upon your bod. People say that being prim is proper. But every show girl knows that prim will stop her." Climbing over the sofa, Natalya placed her firm tush on the back of the piece if furniture, giving both Toris and Feliks a grand view of her smooth legs. "If you got it, give it. Don't be selfish. Give it all away."

"Don't be shy. Be bold and show the boys your birthday suit. When you got it..." Getting up from her seat, Natalya steps over the rest of the sofa and onto the little coffee table in front of it. "If you got it. Once you got it, shout out..." Shimmying her shoulders, Natalya prepared for her big finish while the producers excitedly circled her, cheering silently. "Hooray!"

Instantly after the big finish, Natalya hops off the table and maneuvers around Toris and Feliks, who are scrambling back to their seats, and onto the sofa, sitting perfectly besides the two."Well? You like it?" she asked the two exhausted producers, while not at all looking exhausted herself.

Like it? "Lets just say that, even though we're sitting down, we're giving you a standing ovation." Not long after saying that, both Feliks and Toris not so subtly crossed their legs. "She's in the show!"

"But Feliks, we don't even know if there's a part for her yet." Toris whispered to his partner as Natalya got up to pick up her descarded coat and scarf.

Oy, this kid's gonna raise my blood pressure."Liet, haven't I like, taught you anything?" Feliks asked the oblivious brunette. "There is always a part in the show for the producer's girlfriend."

"Feliks. We don't even know if there's a part for her." Toris repeated mundanely. "And she's not our girlfriend!" He quickly added in with a fierce blush.

Got em' "Not with that attitude! And besides, until we find something for her, she can work for us here as a secretary or something."

"Feliks, a secretary who doesn't speak English? What will people say?"

"Like, they'd say 'Oh, wow, we, wow, we, wow!'" The blonde replied a little too enthusiastically before Toris shot him a unamused look. Calming himself down, Feliks gripped his partner by the shoulder. "Come on, Liet. I like the girl. She's spunky! And I can tell you like her even more." He said causing Toris to blush even more. "Like, just offer her the job and you'll get to spend as much time with her as you want." The blonde said suggestively as he nudged a blushing Toris.

Swatting away Feliks' elbow, Toris couldn't help but sneak a peak at Natalya, hoping she hadn't heard them. 'She really seems to want to be in the play...' The brunette thought to himself upon noticing the somewhat hopeful look the woman had on her face. After contemplating, Toris sighed in defeat and walked up to Natalya with a friendly smile. "It's your lucky day Natalya, I think we may have a position for you."

"As a matter of fact, we may have several positions for you." Feliks added in cheekily.

"But in the meantime, would you be interested in working for us as a secretary-slash-receptionist?" Toris asked as he shot his partner a glare.

"Secretary-slash-receptionist?" Natalya asked to make sure what she heard was correct. When the producers both nodded in clarification, the blonde Slavic thought it over. "If I do this, i'll get a part in the musical?" She asked, giving the producers a suspicious look.

"You bet!"

'Well that was easy...' The slavic thought as she studied their friendly, hopeful faces. 'And they don't seem like the type to double cross me...' Looking Toris dead in the eye, which caused the brunette to flinch from intimidation, Natalya stuck out her hand to him. "If I work for you, then there must be no secrets between us. Deal?"

Upon hearing Natalya's request, Toris looked anxiously at his partner in hopes of getting an answer, but instead he just got a shrug from the blonde man. 'Damn it Feliks...' Toris mentally yelled as turned back to face Natalya. 'You'd think he'd care if someone knew of our scheme...' Cursing his partner's occasional incompetence, Toris steadily shakes Natalya's hand. "Deal." He replied, blushing lightly as he noticed how soft the slavic's hand was. 'I guess theres no harm in her knowing. My, she has very soft hands.'

After seeing the two shake hands, Feliks silently celebrated and walked up to them. "So like, until production starts, you'll be our secretary-slash-receptionist. Kay?"

"Ok, anything else?"

"Well..." Feliks meekly said as he not so casually looked around the office which, in all honesty, looks like a complete dump. "The office could use some organizing, so like, if you don't that is, tidying up?"

Toris normally would've scolded his partner for asking someone, someone really pretty for that matter, such a thing, but after remembering the mess that occasionally haunted his toughts, Toris decided to let it slide.

"Tidy up? Da, I can do that."

Wow, she actually agreed? Nice! "Perfect!" Feliks exclaimed, happy that his house will be clean for once. "You start tomorrow morning! What time can you be here by?"

"Well, every morning I wake up at five AM. From five to seven, I exercise. From seven to eight, I take long shower. From eight to nine, I eat a big breakfast. Many different herrings." She added off-handedly. "From nine to eleven, I practice my singing and dancing. And at eleven, I like to have sex." Natalya said rather bluntly, earning a look of pure shock from her new employers. "So, what time should I get here?"

Is she allowed to be this blunt? After a moment of akward silence, for Toris at least, the producers finally managed to say something. "At eleven." They said simultaneously. God was Toris sweating...

After finally recieving her answer, Natalya nods. "Then I shall come at eleven." she said as she grabbed her coat and made her way to the door. "Dziakuj."

"Dziakuj." Feliks and Toris attempted to say, slurring as they completely butchered the word.

Before walking through the door, Natalya turned around and gave the two men a weird look before letting out what Toris suspected was a smile. 'They are much different then the men back home...' She thought to herself before turning to leave. "God bless America." she said to herself as she walked out of the office, Feliks closing the door behind her.

"Like, God bless Belarus!"


Oh God...I am so sorry that this is so late. My only excuse is that senior year has me by the fake tail.

Anywho, Natalya's here! Believe it or not, Belarus is actually one of my favorite charcters! She so cray cray! Also Poland and her being friends is a headcannon of mine.

ThePsychoticTokyoGhoul-ALOT of Brony conventions. And yes, Feliks and Toris are ironically the sanest in the fic~

Sillypandalover91-Thank you! I certainly am~ I'm really glad to here that my writing is getting better! Hopefully I can keep this up!

As a sidenote, I had recently posted up a poem about Russia, so please read and review it~

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HERO AWAY!

*Flies into a box of kittens*