AUTHOR'S NOTE: I somehow managed to speed through the entirety of both seasons of Black Butler in four days. While I am meant to be studying for exams. Chances are I am going to regret this at some point in the future but OH WELL.
The idea for this one shot popped into my head almost immediately after the last episode of season 2 was over. My genuine first thought was "What about Lizzie?!". I like to believe that Ciel really did love Elizabeth deep down, although I know a lot of Black Butler fans probably disagree with that. Also, please keep in mind I haven't read the manga so my point of view is solely from the anime.
I really hope you enjoy this. It might seem a bit out of character for Ciel but MEH.
Also, this is dedicated to any of my awesome cosplay friends who are reading this. Ya'll know who you are!
Please review if you do enjoy, or even if you don't to let me know how I could improve my writing. Thanks a lot!
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Black Butler in any way, shape or form.
To my dearest Lady Elizabeth,
If you are reading this then it means I am already "dead". I say "dead" because this is not truly the case, but it is what the public and other nobles shall be told so I would appreciate it if you would play along. I know that this is a selfish request but it is the last favour I must ever ask of you.
You, at the very least, deserve to know the truth. Sebastian is not happy with me disclosing this information to you but I trust you. I know you wouldn't betray me. You are far too kind for your own good. On top of that, Sebastian is still merely my butler. He has no power over what I do, whether he is 'one hell of a butler' or not.
The truth is that Sebastian is not an ordinary butler. You are a smart girl so I assume you had figured out that much at least for yourself. I do not wish to go into details for your own safety but let's just say he has been very effective in protecting me these past few years. And now…I am the same as him. I am no longer human. So I suppose in that sense I am in fact dead.
I'm afraid that because of what has happened – because of what I am now – I will never be able to see you again. I don't want you to get hurt and, as has been plain to see these past few months, trouble and pain seem to follow me wherever I go. I have a long list of enemies and no doubt if they realised I am not dead they would try and hurt the people closest to me. I promise you I am only doing this for your safety, Lizzie.
You should also know that my memory has returned. I remember now that Madam Red was killed, about Prince Soma and Agni, and about many more things that you have no knowledge of. I appreciate you going along with the story Sebastian created for my benefit; I know that must have been hard for you and I want you to know it really does mean a lot that you did that for me.
Since I cannot see you anymore, I would like to take this opportunity to break off our engagement. Please believe me when I say I wish I did not have to do this, but there is no point in you being betrothed to someone whom you never see. I just want you to be happy, so I would like you to move on and meet somebody else. I know that our betrothal was arranged by our parents since we are both nobles, but I did grow to love you like a man would love his wife. You mean a lot to me Elizabeth. You always manage to make me smile even when I don't want to. You have such a kind heart, a pure heart. Any man would be lucky to have you as his betrothed. I know I have not been the easiest person to get along with since my parents died, and to be completely honest I am surprised that you have not broken off our engagement before now due to my attitude at some points.
Sebastian told me once that your love for me runs very deep. Ever since my parents died I don't think I have ever really known love, and I doubt I ever shall again. But despite everything I know that you loved me, and although I would never admit it to anybody, even you, I truly feel like I did love you too. I still do to some extent. But I could never marry you now after what I have become. I am truly sorry Lizzie. You would have made a wonderful Lady Phantomhive.
Do you remember that day on the river when we went hunting for the white stag? You said the reason you wanted to find it was because apparently seeing it granted eternal happiness, but you didn't want that for yourself. You wanted to for me. I don't know about eternal happiness but I have always been at my happiest when I am with you. I know I may not always show it but it is the truth. I can now only hope that since you also saw the white stag that you yourself can find eternal happiness.
Actually, I do have one more request for you. Could you look after Bard, Mey-Rin and Finni for me? I told them they could stay on at the mansion and I have a feeling they will do so for a while at least, but regardless of what they decide could you please make sure that they are safe? They all have rather murky pasts in one way or another, but they have all served me well despite being dreadfully clumsy. Tanaka I expect shall stay at the mansion until the end of his days, but please watch out for him as well. He has been a loyal servant to my family for as long as I can remember.
You may never see me again but I promise I will always watch over you Lizzie. I will always be there to protect you from afar. That is one promise I most definitely can keep. I will keep you safe until the day your beautiful soul goes and meets with the Lord in heaven.
Maybe I shall see you again on that final day. Until then, my dear Lady Elizabeth,
Earl Ciel Phantomhive
AN: Thank you for reading! Again, please review!