30Hi everyone! This is my first fanfic. I am very excited! It is based on Witfit prompts. Hope you like it.
I don't own Twilight. Or a Beta.
Promt: Easier said than done
There is always a cave. And there must always be something lurking inside it. And then there is one very compelling reason to walk right inside.
Driving to the Cullen house went against every self-preservation principle I had. Signposts saying 'There be dragons' or ' That way, madness lies' would be fitting. Madness. That was exactly what I felt crawling under my skin. I wanted to turn the car around and never think about this. But I was not that Bella now. I would not run. Not ever. Not from him.
The sun had set and as the house appeared like a beacon against darkness. A bitter laugh escaped me. No more light for me now. It was a sad thought. The Cullen house was my second home, my refuge. I had spent more time here than at my own house in the last few years - holed up with Alice, eating Esme's muffins, watching the rain fall. But today, the house felt like something unknown and threatening.
I saw the Volvo parked between Emmet's Jeep and Alice's car. Edward was finally home. I coudln't hide from that fact.
I walked to the door. I could do this. I would make my skin thicker and turn my heart to stone. I groaned, resting my head on the door. There was no need to be so dramatic.
Finally I rang the doorbell. Alice opened the door, grabbed my shoulders and checked me, I guess looking for signs of stress, broken heart or insanity. She wouldn't let me self-combust on her watch. I smiled at her. Alice, she always made things better.
"I am fine Alice.. really…. Just crazy thoughts….nothing a little dragon skin won't cure."
Alice raised her eye brows but nodded. Then she scowled and tightened her hold on my hand.
"He brought a girl."
" Oh," I tried to process that.
Alice turned back to make sure we had privacy and then pulled me inside.
" Swan, you can freak out later," she said as she took my coat "But right now you WILL face this with dignity. I will take you to my room in few minutes. Ok…..OK?"
I was afraid she would knock on my head. She would. Woodpecker.
She had an arm around my waist as if I may sway and fall to the ground like a fragile tree in a storm. I smiled. That is probably how she saw me. And that was probably what this was. A storm. It had always been a storm where he was concerned.
I nodded once forcefully. No time like the present. "Let's just do this Alice." There was no delaying it. And he was just a boy I had known two years ago. Just a boy.
We walked into the living room where Esme was sitting with Carlisle both of them happily chatting with Emmet and Rose.
"Bella! Look at you all grown up!" Emmet grabbed me the second he saw me and actually shook me before putting me down. I was overwhelmed with memory.
" Hi Emmet," I squeaked. It was so nice to see him again….. and Rose. She came and gave me a hug.
"Hang on Swan!" She whispered. Alice brought reinforcements. God it was good to see her face. I'd missed every one being together.
"Bella. It's great you could come tonight," Carlisle came and squeezed my shoulder.
Esme beamed and stood next to me holding my hand. They wouldn't say anything but they knew this would be hard for me.
That was how we looked when I heard footsteps on the stairs. Alice and Rose behind me and Esme Carlisle and Emmet right beside me. I groaned inside. Great. Now he thinks I need a battalion with me to just look at his face and say hello.
As the footsteps got close, Esme and Carlisle went to the dining room saying something about final touches to dinner. Rose gave me a pointed look and dragged Emmet with her. For once, Emmet didn't say anything stupid.
Alice did not budge and I was grateful. I did not want to check how I'd do if I had to face him alone.
"Bella" His voice was just as I remembered it.
I turned around, my eyes taking him in as much as I could in the few seconds that I was allowed. There was a tightness in my chest and I tried to breathe without looking like I had run a marathon.
He looked devastatingly beautiful. Green shirt, black pants. Same green eyes and bronze mess. He was taller, his jaw different. His eyes were different too. I expected him to offer a fake smile, blink and move on. But he held my gaze.
I managed a small smile that lasted the long breath I had started to take when I saw his face. A deep sadness gripped me. Seeing him made me remember what we had. His presence, the fact that he had grown, the fact that he had not taken me in his arms, the fact that I did not run to him, all made the memory even more distant and maybe unreal.
"Hi Edward," my voice did not crack. "Welcome home."
"Thanks," He was standing on the last step and did not come down to give me a hug. Behind him was a blond girl who was waiting for him to move.
"Bella, this is Lauren. Lauren this is our friend Bella." It was Alice who made the introduction. Edward barely glanced at Alice but here was a brief look of irritation on his face before he took Lauren's hand and headed towards the kitchen. Lauren and I politely smiled at each other while she passed us.
That was quick. I pressed my lips together and turned to Alice.
"Bella, I have to show you something." Alice dragged me up the stairs and yelled for Rose to come too. We fell on Alice's bed.
"You OK?' Alice asked. "You can get it out of your system here and we'll go have dinner."
I nod, biting my lips to keep from saying something completely idiotic. Like 'why is it never me?'
"Say something Bella!" Rose shook me. I let out an embarrassed sigh. I'd barely spoken. "I am fine" was not much of a communication, even by Bella standards.
"I just want to not feel," I said rubbing my elbows to keep myself calm. "I want to just live though this until he goes back."
Rose and Alice shared a strange look and immediately I was on the edge again.
"What?"
"Nothing Bella. You're right… let's just get though dinner."
Dinner smelled amazing. I sat down and tried to appear normal.
Edward did not look at me the whole night.
Well, what do you think?