I accidently vaporize my pre-algebra teacher

"How dare you do that? I get your Fish head's son but do you really have no appreciation for school?!" Athena practically screamed everybody off of Olympus. People were just too scared to tell her that maybe it was a monster.

"Well? Answer, boy!"

"Uhh…." Percy scrambled through his brain for a good answer. "Well… you see… I… it was a dire situation, I had no choice, besides as you can see it was accidental, it is after all mentioned in the chapter title."

"Nice save." Thalia whispered

"Thanks."

"Athena as much as I would love to see Poseidon's son be interrogated, I think we should continue with the books." Zeus said.

"Fine! But I'm watching you." Athena threatened

"I wonder what will happen when she finds out about Annabeth." Nico mused quietly.

"Shut up, you want to get me killed?" Percy hissed at him.

"I don't think I need to do that you're doing fine on your own." Nico retorted.

"Just continue reading Nico, or you'll have Riptide at your throat." Percy threatened. Nico happily obliged.

Look, I didn't want to be a half-blood.

"Uh, Percy I've got a very important question, who does?" Thalia asked.

"Why wouldn't you want to be a demigod, you get to know of this world." Hermes questioned.

"Yeah, but you're constantly plagued by monsters are you?" Thalia answered his question and effectively shut him up.

If you're reading this because you think you might be one, my advice is:

"Percy giving advice? This is scandalous!" Thalia gasped.

"Wow Thalia didn't know you had such a good vocabulary!" Percy remarked.

"We must run for the hills Immediately!" Nico continued ignoring Percy's remarks.

"Yes, do that and you might just find your heads rolling down the other side, now if we want to finish this book in this century, can we please read!"

"Fine you don't need to scream."

Close this book right now.

"Okay." Hermes said brightly. He ran from his throne and snatched the book from Nico, and snapped it shut. Everybody looked at him weirdly.

"What? It said close this book."

"Well the book didn't mean it literally, now give the book back or be at the mercy of me arrows." Artemis seethed.

"Okay, okay arty no need to get mad."

"DO NOT call me ARTY." Artemis yelled

"Yeah, only I can call her that." Apollo interjected.

"NO you CANNOT"

"Whatever you say sis."

"Don't call me sis. Honestly, I don't know what I did wrong to deserve to be related to you imbeciles. Sometimes I wish you weren't even born! It's like you came to the world solely to annoy me!" This time Artemis went too far, hurt flashed on Apollo's face.

"I... I need to go, someone requires help to write a song, excuse me." And he flashed out.

The throne room was quite. Mainly surprised at Artemis's outburst, usually she let Apollo go over her head. Maybe she was just stressed.

"Should I… should I continue." Nico asked Artemis.

"Yes." Was all she said, she looked a bit guilty.

Believe what-ever lie your mom or dad told you about your birth, and try to lead a normal life.

"Wait is this book for mortals to read?" Hephaestus asked. Everybody jumped, he had been so quiet.

"I think so." Athena answered.

Something clicked in Percy's head. His face brightened up and looked like a Christmas light.

"You okay Perce?" Thalia asked.

"Don't you get it Thalia? If this book is read by mortals then…. I'm famous!"

"I'm famous! Yeah baby! I'm famous!"

"Oh who cares? They probably think you're a fictional character!" Artemis yelled at him, she was not in a good mood since Apollo left.

Usually Percy didn't like his celebration being disrupted, but he knew she was distressed so he let it pass. "Nico read."

Being a half-blood is dangerous. It's scary. Most of the time, it gets you killed in painful, nasty ways.

"So true." Percy sighed.

Nobody argued with him, they had all seen good demigods pass in either of the three ways.

If you're a normal kid, reading this because you think it's fiction, great. Read on. I envy you for being able to believe that none of this ever happened.

"Oh, don't worry Percy we all feel envious of them." Thalia said sadly. She had had a hard life, but of course her father would take this the wrong way.

"Oh, do you think that the gods are not worthy to be your family, you would rather have puny mortals as your family, Bah! Most disrespectful, you should feel proud to have, Zeus! The lord of the universe, king of the Gods as your father!"

"Oh lord of Dramatics is more like it. But who wouldn't feel envious when they have Lord Egghead and Bird poop as a Father." Poseidon asked innocently, while everybody tried to stifle their laughter.

"I completely agree, sometimes I wish I was mortal so I wouldn't be related to Mr. Dramatic and Hasty. I can't believe I can actually put up with your ugly face. I do not blame her for being envious of these mortals." Hades added.

"Oh, look what supportive and wonderful brothers I have!"

"Nice to see you admit it. Now let's continue." Poseidon replied.

But if you recognize yourself in these pages-if you feel something stirring inside-stop reading immediately.

"STOP!" Hermes shouted.

"What now?" Nico asked irritatedly, seriously if people were going to stop him every other sentence, he might as well not read.

"The book said stop reading, so stop." Hermes replied as that explanation was perfectly valid.

"Can someone please duct tape him? I want to read." Athena complained.

"Please, you always want to read what's so different now?" Poseidon asked

"This time people were sent from the future to read! Not that I expect you to understand Fish Face."

"Owl head!"

"Kelp Brain"

"Book worm"

"Horse breath"

"Smart a-"

"ENOUGH!"

Everybody looked at Nico.

"Can I please read, without interruptions? Thank you."

"Never thought the day would come when Nico would want to read." Percy snickered. Nico glared at him

You might be one of us. And once you know that, it's only a matter of time before they sense it too, and they'll come for you.

"Nice introduction." Thalia said.

"Yeah, if you didn't scare them before their definitely scared now." Nico said

"Oh shut up, it's not like I could control my thoughts or knew that you would read them."

"You should always be prepared." Thalia replied

Don't say I didn't warn you.

"You didn't warn me." Nico said.

Thalia whacked him on the head. "Stop interrupting your reading."

My name is Percy Jackson.

"No really we didn't know. Thank you for enlightening us with this info." Thalia said sarcastically.

"Funny I don't remember asking for your opinion." Percy replied.

I'm twelve years old. Until a few months ago, I was a boarding student at Yancy Academy, a private school for troubled kids in upstate New York.

"You actually went to school? Wow!" Thalia exclaimed

"Shut up." Percy replied

"Make me."

"Are you sure."

"Bring it on Kelp face."

"Both of you shut up and let me READ! Now if anybody interrupts me they will be in trouble." Nico screamed.

"What are you going to do, demigod?" Ares asked.

Nico didn't say anything but gave him a glare scarier than the darkest pits of Tartarus itself. Are wisely shut up.

Am I a troubled kid?

"Yes." Thalia snorted.

"You're not any less troubled than I am. Don't deny it." Percy retorted.

Thalia was about to reply but Nico was glaring at them so hard she wisely shut up.

Yeah. You could say that.

This time Thalia could not hold it in. She burst into laughter.

"Son, you do not call yourself troubled. You are supposed to deny it." Poseidon advised.

"Thanks dad, like I didn't know that."

I could start at any point in my short miserable life to prove it

Before anybody could say anything, Nico glared at them daring them to say something. Nobody tried. Hades felt his chest swell up with pride, his son was just as scary as him.

But things really started going bad last May, when our sixth-grade class took a field trip to Manhattan- twenty-eight mental-case kids and two teachers on a yellow school bus, heading to the Metropolitan Museum of Art to look at ancient Greek and Roman stuff.

"Notice how he counts himself as a mental case as well." Thalia pointed out.

"Yeah you might as well admit it Percy, then we can get you help as soon as possible." Nico agreed.

"My don't I have wonderful cousins." Percy stated sarcastically.

"The best." Said cousins replied.

Zeus on the other hand was thinking along different lines. "Stuff? We are not stuff! We are deities, all powerful beings! We are-"

"Yeah yeah, nobody asked for your opinion Zeus." Poseidon cut him off.

I know-it sounds like torture. Most Yancy field trips were.

"It does not! It will help you learn of your heritage boy, Museums are the best places on earth." Athena ranted.

"It's like somebody cloned Annabeth." Thalia whispered.

"Please it sounds just like torture, But you're one to enjoy torture aren't you?" Poseidon remarked.

"Only an imbecile like you wouldn't appreciate our history." Athena retorted.

"Please, I don't like to remember the horrific time when you were born."

"Maybe you just don't like to remember the time when you lost Athens."

"Maybe I just don't like to remember your ugly face, oh wait I can't forget it since I have to look at it every day." Poseidon said.

"Oh really? Well I have no pleasure looking at your hideous face either."

"Excuse me? My face is not hideous, I was voted most handsome god on Olympus weekly." Poseidon said.

"Really? When was that? A millennium ago? Because all I see is wrinkles and white hair." Athena spat.

"Well you're not gorgeous either. No wonder you fall in love intellectually, you can't bear to show your face in public."

"Why you little-"

"SILENCE" Zeus roared "Enough, let the boy read, we must finish this book. Continue."

But Mr. Brunner, our Latin teacher, was leading this trip, so I had hopes.

"Wait, wait, wait, you mean you had high hopes with a teacher?" Thalia gasped.

"Yes I d-"

"I need to mark this day, alert the media! Oh I need to mark this day on every calendar in the world, Oh gosh Percy, Annabeth would be so proud! We must declare this an international holiday." Thalia exclaimed.

"I don't mean to interrupt the celebration, but who is this 'Annabeth'? Hmm?" Aphrodite asked.

Percy looked like a deer caught in headlights. He sent a pleading look to his cousins; thankfully Nico came to the rescue. "Annabeth is a friend of Percy's."

Aphrodite looked unconvinced but let it go for now.

Mr. Brunner was this middle-aged guy in a motorized wheelchair. He had thinning hair and a scruffy beard and a frayed tweed jacket, which always smelled like coffee.

"He definitely reminds me of somebody, just can't put my finger on it." Thalia said.

"Yeah he is familiar." Nico agreed.

You wouldn't think he'd be cool, but he told stories and jokes and let us play games in class. He also had this awesome collection of Roman armor and weapons, so he was the only teacher whose class didn't put me to sleep.

"You sleep in class?!" Athena asked horrified.

"Well it's not by choice, I mean; I can't help it, blame the ADHD."

Athena didn't look happy about it but let it pass.

I hoped the trip would be okay. At least, I hoped that for once I wouldn't get in trouble.

"Please you're literally married to trouble." Thalia said.

"Yeah, it is practically impossible for you not get into trouble." Nico said

"Does he get into that much trouble?" Poseidon asked, worried.

"Well…" Percy smiled sheepishly, letting his father know that he indeed did get into that much trouble. Poseidon started feeling very worried for his son.

Boy, was I wrong.

"See?"

"Nobody said you were wrong Thalia." Percy pointed out.

Thalia being the mature one stuck her tongue out.

"Very mature Thalia, anyway read Nico."

See, bad things happen to me on field trips.

"Further proving my point."

"I think you've proved your point enough and by the looks of it you should stop before you give my father a heart attack." Percy replied.

Like at my fifth-grade school, when we went to the Saratoga battlefield, I had this accident with a Revolutionary War cannon. I wasn't aiming for the school bus, but of course I got expelled anyway.

Everybody burst out laughing, even Athena has to admit this was rather funny. After everybody had calmed down considerably, Ares asked "What were you aiming for?"

"I don't know I think an annoying teacher maybe? I'm not sure." Percy replied. This of course sent everybody into another round of laughter.

And before that, at my fourth-grade school, when we took a behind- the-scenes tour of the Marine World shark pool, I sort of hit the wrong lever on the catwalk and our class took an unplanned swim. And the time before that... Well, you get the idea.

"NO, tell us more." Hermes exclaimed holding his stomach.

"Maybe later." Percy replied.

This trip, I was determined to be good.

"Yeah and I can spit on books." Athena said sarcastically.

"I didn't know Athena could even think of that." Apollo said.

"Dude, when did you come back?" Hermes asked.

"While you were all laughing." Apollo replied.

If you looked closely at Apollo, you would notice the slightly red eyes he had; he quietly went over to his throne next to Hermes and sat down,

"Are you okay?" Hermes asked.

"Just peachy." Apollo replied. He avoided eye contact with anybody especially his sister, Artemis, who was looking at him with a guilty expression.

"So, what did I miss?" He asked

"Not much, just that Percy is crazy and married to trouble." Thalia answered his question, while Percy glared at her like no tomorrow.

All the way into the city, I put up with Nancy Bobofit, the freckly, redheaded kleptomaniac girl, hitting my best friend Grover in the back of the head with chunks of peanut butter-and-ketchup sandwich.

"EWWW" Aphrodite screeched.

"I get that that is a bad combination, but do really have to make every one's ears bleed?" Apollo asked.

"She was hitting Grover?" Thalia asked angrily.

"Calm down, Thalia I'm sure Percy did something about it, right Percy?" He glared at Percy's direction telling him to play along or else.

"Of course, you'll see." Percy replied and Nico gave him a satisfied look as Thalia calmed down a little.

"Make sure it's good" Thalia said to Percy.

Grover was an easy target. He was scrawny. He cried when he got frustrated.

"Nice way to describe a friend, Perce" Thalia said,

"Yeah I wonder what kind of descriptions we will get, since this is how he's describing his best friend." Nico added.

"You better give us good descriptions or else." Thalia turned her menacing glare on Percy.

"I will." He promised. And prayed to every god that he did give them good descriptions, they looked very amused.

He must've been held back several grades, because he was the only sixth grader with acne and the start of a wispy beard on his chin. On top of all that, he was crippled. He had a note excusing him from PE for the rest of his life because he had some kind of muscular disease in his legs.

"Gee, your descriptions become more and more flattering don't they Perce?" Thalia asked sarcastically.

"Well it's not my fault, I was just being honest, I didn't know he was a satyr." Percy replied.

"SPOILER ALERT." Nico screamed.

"jeez, okay."

He walked funny, like every step hurt him, but don't let that fool you. You should've seen him run when it was enchilada day in the cafeteria.

"Only Grover." Thalia laughed fondly.

"Say, Dionysus doesn't Grover sound like one of your Satyrs that go look for demigods?" Apollo asked.

"Yes, I think I know this Grumper you talk about, he would be very young I think."

'Well if he is, then he's not doing a good job on keeping cover." Apollo stated.

"Grover never was good at these things was he?" Thalia asked.

"Nope. He kept blowing his cover, I mean he was supposed to keep his cap on but I kept seeing his horns, I told Bianca but she didn't believe me, thought I was off my rocker." Nico replied

"Aww, Nico you are off your rocker, just embrace it." Percy said.

"No Percy I think you confused me with someone else."

"Shut up"

Anyway, Nancy Bobofit was throwing wads of sandwich that stuck in his curly brown hair, and she knew I couldn't do anything back to her because I was already on probation.

"PERCY! I thought you said you would do something to her?" Thalia screamed.

"I will, I will, just you read on." Percy replied.

"Why were you on probation?" Athena asked.

"I got into trouble with a student." Percy replied.

"Of course you did." Thalia whispered, while Athena glared.

The headmaster had threatened me with death by in-school suspension if anything bad, embarrassing, or even mildly entertaining happened on this trip.

"But that's boring!" Apollo complained.

"Yeah, we need action, this book is boring!" Ares also complained.

"Well lord Ares I'm sure you will have enough of action to satisfy you later in the book, this is after all the first chapter." Percy retorted back.

Ares blushed while everybody snickered.

"I'm going to kill her," I mumbled.

"Do it, I need more action." Ares exclaimed.

Athena who looked disgusted at this said, " Do you really not think that more action could mean the death of him?"

"Like I care, I just need more action." Ares replied.

"Oh, you need action I'll give you more action, if anything happens to my son because of your 'action' need then we will see exactly how much you love action." Poseidon threatened and Ares visibly gulped.

Grover tried to calm me down. "It's okay. I like peanut butter. "

"I get liking peanut butter for eating but in your hair?" Aphrodite asked absolutely repulsed.

"Peanut butter?! Who would eat such a horrible thing when you have some wonderful whole wheat cereal to provide nutrition? It provides fiber, it makes you fit and in shape! Helps in digestion, it is-"

"SHUT UP woman! Its bad enough I hear you in the underworld, as if the souls aren't bad enough! Add a ranting Demeter and I have my own personal Tartarus!"

"How... How dare you?! I'll have you know that I have no pleasure in seeing your ugly and hideous face! Sorry excuse for a brother! I only come there to keep my poor daughter company! She is so sad, though I expect no less from having you as a husband! You are nothing more than a kidnapper!"

"Oh really? You should know that she is happy with me! I try to give her the most time I can! Why can't you just forget it? It has been millenniums! Just for once ask her!" Hades yelled back.

Zeus was holding his head, he had seen this fight so many times, actually all the gods were bored, except Ares, he was looking like a getting a whole truck of candy for free, he eyes were alight, while the demigods were looking from one to the other like a tennis match.

"ENOUGH, STOP THIS INSTANT!" Everybody looked at the source of this shout, Ares looked very disappointed. Their sight was met with a very exasperated looking Hestia.

"Look, the poor demigods have been sent here from the future, you could at least give them some time. We have been on the same chapter for a long time, please put your differences aside and just read the book. So we can know what happens in the future and fix what went wrong. Please." Hestia gave a nice speech, and everyone agreed and Nico started to read again.

He dodged another piece of Nancy's lunch.

Thalia started to fume and Percy tried to calm her down, saying that he did hurt her.

"That's it." I started to get up, but Grover pulled me back to my seat.

"WHAT? How dare that miserable satyr disrupt a fight?! I'll kill him and tear his bone apart, rip his tendons, break every organ-" He started to get up, but grape vines pulled him down.

"Sit down Ares! If you dare lay a hand on my satyrs, we will finally see the extent of your war madness." Dionysus threatened.

Hephaestus looked pleased and beamed at Dionysus; finally someone understands that Ares is a waste of space.

"You're already on probation, " he reminded me. "You know who'll get blamed if anything happens. "

"I always get blamed!" Percy complained.

"That's because you usually have something to do with it." Thalia reminded him.

"No I don't." Percy denied.

"Please Percy be honest. I'm sure there's a reason you're on probation. Come to think of it, what did you do to get on probation?" Nico asked.

"Yeah what happened?" Thalia asked.

"Oh you're going to love this Thalia. See, Nancy was really bugging me, so I decided she needed to be taught a lesson. So I pranked her, horribly as well. When she was out, me and Grover snuck into her dorm room and Grover took the Bathroom while I took the bedroom. I spread a jar of bedbugs on her bed, then filled her bag with shaving cream, then covered her clothes from the inside with honey, cos I knew there was a tree outside in the courtyard that had bees in it. Grover meanwhile filled her shampoo with hair removal cream and filled her shower water somehow with mud and for the final we filled her lotion and jar of peanut butter with dead bugs." Percy finished with a maniacal grin.

"Wow." Was all Thalia could say.

"You are my new favorite, this prank is perfect, Hephaestus we should watch this on your TV. And you call me when you need more prank ideas." Hermes exclaimed.

"Wow I think the stolls will be forever jealous." Thalia said.

Looking back on it, I wish I'd decked Nancy Bobofit right then and there. In-school suspension would've been nothing compared to the mess I was about to get myself into.

"Why? What trouble did you get into? Did you make it out alive?" Asked Poseidon frantically.

"Of course he is alive. You can see him here can't you? He's not a spirit, though It would be better if he would go ahead and get himself killed. One less nuisance to deal with." Athena said.

"Oh shut up, you hay wired owl, we will see how bad you have it when your children are in danger."

"My children won't be in danger; they wouldn't be near your spawn to be in trouble." Athena smirked

"Oh how she will regret saying this." Thalia whispered to her cousins. Who in turn smiled wickedly?

Mr. Brunner led the museum tour.

He rode up front in his wheelchair, guiding us through the big echoey galleries, past marble statues and glass cases full of really old black-and-orange pottery.

"Black and orange pottery? This is the amount of appreciation you show to your heritage? Why I should blast you for your incompetence! It disgusts me that you are even in my presence, your worse than your hard headed father!" Athena screeched.

"Athena leave the boy alone, I'm sure he will show the respect the pottery deserves later on when he learns who he is." Hestia said trying to calm Athena down.

"Fine, but you are most definitely not in my good books."

"Oh please Athena, like he ever was or would want to. And pottery what do you want us to do, present it with the crown jewels of London? Make it our ruler? Pottery." Poseidon said snarkily

Athena's face turned red, she was about to lash out when Percy said. "Why don't we read?" Ares glared at him which he ignored.

It blew my mind that this stuff had survived for two thousand, three thousand years.

Athena was so surprised she fell of her throne, not her finest moment. She opened her mouth to say something,

"READ! I don't want to hear another rant, I have had enough to last me a lifetime!" Poseidon yelled, while many of the other gods nodded vigorously. Athena glared at them all.

He gathered us around a thirteen-foot-tall stone col-umn with a big sphinx on the top, and started telling us how it was a grave marker, a stele, for a girl about our age.

"So many demigods are lost at such a ripe age." Hestia said sadly.

"Who cares? They died fighting! Fight!" Ares screamed

Most gods looked disgusted at this Artemis, Athena and Hephaestus more than any other. Aphrodite though seemed to have no problem with this

"Of course dear, no more honorable way to die." Ares grinned wider than a Cheshire cat. Artemis looked repulsed, sure she didn't like Aphrodite for her shallowness, but there is a limit.

"How can you say that?! It may be honorable but it's utterly tragic! How many die and then leave their loved ones in despair, but of course I wouldn't expect the goddess of love to understand." Artemis exclaimed

Aphrodite turned various shades of red, while Ares glowed with anger, "Why you little…" He raised his sword but was met with an arrow in the face.

"Touch my sister and it will be your last action." Apollo threatened, but Ares wasn't going to back down, "I'm not scared of you, hotshot."

"Funny you say that, the sun is very hot! Now why don't you sit down or I burn you to ashes?!" Apollo warned. Ares gulped.

Artemis looked impressed and pleased; she sneaked a glance at Apollo, but still avoided eye contact with her.

He told us about the carvings on the sides. I was trying to listen to what he had to say, because it was kind of interesting,

As the words escaped Nico's mouth Athena started gaping like a fish, while the demigods took out hire weapons and pointed them at Percy,

"Who are you and what have you done with Percy?" Thalia asked venomously.

"Yeah, tell the truth, or we'll run you through with our weapons." Nico stated

"Guys! The one time I find something interesting, you make a big deal about it, by the way you do know you cannot run me through, right?"

"Right, though it's weird you know, that you actually found it interesting. Usually when Annabeth's teaching you something you zone out then she smacks you in the head with a dictionary." Nico said.

"Anyway let's get reading."

but everybody around me was talking, and every time I told them to shut up, the other teacher chaperone, Mrs. Dodds, would give me the evil eye.

"Yet another person you have angered, Percy, how many enemies do you need?" Thalia asked

"Hey it's not like I try to make them. They just happen." Percy replied.

"Is Mrs. Dodds…?" Nico began

"Yeah, it's her." Percy cut him off

"Well then I don't blame you for making enemies with her."

"Is anybody going to let me in on the conversation?" Asked Thalia.

"No it would ruin the story." Was the reply she got, she was hoping for more like an apology and an explanation.

Mrs. Dodds was this little math teacher from Georgia who always wore a black leather jacket, even though she was fifty years old.

"Well not teacher I know has ever taken the liberty too look cool." Apollo said.

"And just how many teachers do you know?" Asked Athena.

"She has such a bad sense of fashion, I should help her." Aphrodite sympathized.

"Please, I sympathize with that who is being helped by you." Artemis replied.

"You do know that no help in the world can help her, right." Percy asked.

"And why is that, my dear?" Aphrodite asked. "Surely, no one can withstand my power."

"I'm sure she can." Percy replied.

"Why, who is she?" Hermes asked. "I need to get some pointers from her."

"Yeah, hope you don't meet her, now let's just move on and let me read." Nico snapped.

She looked mean enough to ride a Harley right into your locker. She had come to Yancy halfway through the year, when our last math teacher had a nervous breakdown.

"I love Harleys! And I know how to drive 'em too!" Ares exclaimed

"Yeah that's why your bike is always in my workshop and you in Apollo's care." Hephaestus snarled.

"Well at least I have some company with me on the bike." Ares retorted

Hephaestus turned different shades of red, the gods and demigods all agreed that was a low blow even for Ares. Ares was on the receiving end of many glares, the strongest ones from Dionysus, Hera and the demigods.

"Apologize." Hera ordered.

"B –But."

"No buts, apologize right now!"

"Sorry."

Everybody was pleased and started reading again.

From her first day, Mrs. Dodds loved Nancy Bobofit and figured I was devil spawn.

"She's got her personalities mixed up, the devil spawn is either Nancy or Nico." Thalia said.

"Yeah…. Wait, wait, wait, me?"

"Well yeah, I mean you are the son of…" Thalia trailed off.

"I AM NOT THE DEVIL!" Hades roared

"Please, anybody who kidnaps somebody's innocent young daughter, forces 'em to marry him, then keep the in that hellish place, is a devil." Demeter ranted.

"I don't remember asking your opinion, and if you please, the underworld technically is hell." Hades retorted.

"You don't have to be proud to be king of such a place." Hermes interjected.

"And why not?" Hades asked

"Well it's rather depressing down there and people are scared of you." Hermes answered.

"Then what exactly is hell supposed to be like? Are there supposed to be pearly gates with pink flowers and bows? I'm sorry I was not aware of that, please why don't you take place as king of the underworld?" Hades replied sarcastically.

"I would make a pretty good king don't you think? I mean I could get some rest and speed up the process of judgment." Hermes answered, completely ignoring the sarcasm. Hades's jaw dropped open, and everybody laughed at him.

She would point her crooked finger at me and say, "Now, honey, " real sweet, and I knew I was going to get after-school detention for a month.

"Kinda, reminds me of Umbridge." Thalia said

"Who?" Percy and Nico asked together. They looked at each other weirdly.

"You know from Harry Potter." Thalia replied

"Who's Harry Potter?" They again asked Thalia.

"Really? You don't know who Harry Potter is? What world have you been living in? It's the famous book of course written by J.K Rowling." Thalia answered, bewildered.

"Wow, Thalia didn't know you had a thing for books. And excuse me for not knowing, I tend to stay away from books." Percy answered.

"Ha ha ha, very funny, it would probably explain your lack of intelligence." Thalia sassed.

"You stay away from books? How? Even as water head's son? I cannot believe! You. You, at camp stay away from my children, let's hope they don't catch your disease." Athena warned, while Percy's cousins smirked at him and he glared at them.

On the other side of the throne room

"Detention for a month! Oh I don't think even Hades's punishments are this bad!" Hermes exclaimed.

"This thing is truly evil." Apollo agreed.

"I bet Athena sent this monster, look at the way she's terrorizing Percy." Poseidon said.

"I am not terrorizing the boy! I'm merely warning him to stay away from my children or else!" Athena defended.

"Please, just hear yourself, if you don't call that terrorizing then I don't what it is."

"Maybe it's what you do to Athens, sinking their ships."

"They do not deserve mercy from me! They didn't except me so be it!"

"You're just a sore loser."

"And you're an over grown bat!"

"What?"

"You heard me."

"Overgrown- How dare you, why I should-"

"Do what? Turn me into a spider? A snake?"

"No, you deserve something worse."

"OOH, I'm scared."

"You should be." Their bodies were glowing,

Athena took her battle stance, while Poseidon readied his trident. The gods were interested since their fights never went this far.

"Fight, fight, fight!" Ares cheered in the background. The demigods were scared, Hermes and Apollo were placing bets, Hephaestus and Artemis joined.

"You sure you want to do this?" Athena asked

"Yeah why? Scared you'll lose?"

"No, I'm scared you won't make it."

"Well thanks for caring, but I think you won't make it." Athena's eyes got tinged with red. She was about to strike when…

BOOM

There was smoke, when it cleared, people saw a very angry Hestia with fire in her hand.

"ENOUGH! I've had enough! Control yourselves, starting a fight in the middle! What do you think you are? If you're gods then behave like them! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, to change and shape the future into a better one! And you're acting like it's your own personal drama! Now we are going to finish this book, and I don't want to hear a peep out of you!"

One time, after she'd made me erase answers out of old math workbooks until midnight, I told Grover I didn't think Mrs. Dodds was human.

Hermes was about to say something , but one glare from Hestia shut him up. Who knew she had a dark side.

He looked at me, real serious, and said, "You're absolutely right. "

Thalia couldn't hold it, she burst out laughing. When everybody looked at her weird, she asked

"What?"

"Why are you laughing?" Percy asked.

"It's just so funny, the gods are being well mannered by a simple glare." Thalia answered. Percy and Nico also started laughing.

"It is not a simple glare, you should see her man, she's creepy." Apollo said.

"I am not creepy! I am just trying to say that you should listen to the book and not fight over petty things." Hestia snapped

"It was not petty! She was terrorizing my son!" Poseidon said.

"I was not terrorizing your son, I wouldn't waste my time on it." Athena replied

" You wouldn't waste your precious time on anything but keeping your nose in a dictionary, you have no life."

Athena was about to reply when,

"I agree with Hestia, we are not at all like a family, we should be one." Hera interjected

"They would be so much better if they had more cereal, in fact we'll have some for dinner." Demeter said.

Everybody groaned, "I thought cereal was for breakfast." Percy asked

"Insolent boy! Cereal is for all times! Do not disrespect cereals, or you will face my wrath!"

"Percy, don't disrespect cereal, I've had enough experiences, trust me." Nico advised. Hades didn't like this.

"Look Demeter, you terrorize my son, with your fearsome cereal."

"I don't terrorize him! He needs to learn to respect cereal, besides it is you who terrorize me, whenever I see my poor daughter stuck down there!" Demeter replied.

Hera who saw where this was leading, "Read, demigod!" she screamed.

Mr. Brunner kept talking about Greek funeral art.

Finally, Nancy Bobofit snickered something about the naked guy on the stele, and I turned around and said, "Will you shut up?"

"Nice!" Thalia said.

"What happened when you said it?" Hermes asked.

"Let's think, maybe you'll find out, if you let Nico read." Percy answered.

"Okay, jeez, what's it with people and bad moods, its ruining the mood." Hermes replied.

Everybody looked at him weirdly then turned to the book.

It came out louder than I meant it to.

"Of course it did, everything you do comes out wrong." Thalia said.

"Hey! It does not." Percy defended.

"Really Percy you sure?" Nico asked.

Poseidon felt the need to defend his son,

"I'm sure luck just doesn't work with him." Poseidon said.

"Come on, we all know demigods make matters worse, they are a waste of time." Dionysus said. The gods with children glared at him, while the demigods just sighed.

"What he meant to say is that demigods get into trouble a lot so, it is hard handling it." Hephaestus amended in hopes to save Dionysus from the wrath of multiple gods.

"Y.. Yeah, what he said." Dionysus tried.

"That better have been what you meant." Hermes threatened.

The whole group laughed. Mr. Brunner stopped his story.

"Mr. Jackson, " he said, "did you have a comment?"

"Yes Mr. Jackson, did you have a comment?" Thalia tried to mimic Mr. Brunner.

Everybody laughed. "Shut up, Thalia."

"The day he ever has a comment on something intellectual or correctly answers a teacher's question is the day I bow down to Poseidon." Athena snorted.

"Please tell me you answered a question correct." Poseidon begged.

"Wait and see dad."

My face was totally red. I said, "No, sir. "

"Ha!" Athena smirked.

"Oh don't forget the answer of the question." Poseidon reminded her. Athena's face fell a little. But then she remembered that there was no way the boy could answer a question correct.

Mr. Brunner pointed to one of the pictures on the stele. "Perhaps you'll tell us what this picture represents?"

"As if he would know the answer." Athena snorted. Poseidon grinned like a maniac, Athena started to worry.

I looked at the carving, and felt a flush of relief, because I actually recognized it.

Poseidon looked at Athena, she swallowed.

"Now wait, let's see if he actually answers correct."

"You're just stalling." Was the reply she got.

"That's Kronos eating his kids, right?"

"It's always that one." Hades complained.

"Hush, I want to see what happens next, if Athena will finally bow to me."

"In your dreams!" Athena said, but on the inside she was worried.

"Yes, "

"Yes! Now bow." Poseidon shouted, throwing his hands in the air.

"Wait, he has something else to say too."

"You can stall all you want, we will see you bow to Poseidon, Athena." Apollo said.

Mr. Brunner said, obviously not satisfied. "And he did this because ... "

"See." Athena said.

"And if he gets this right?" Hermes asked, he was looking forward to this. Athena shut up.

"Never thought Athena's honor would depend on Percy." Thalia whispered. Nico laughed while Percy smirked.

"Annabeth will be soo angry when she finds out." Thalia said.

"She will." Nico agreed.

"Well... " I racked my brain to remember. "Kronos was the king god, and-"

"Ha! He got it wrong!" Athena pointed out relieved.

"Wait, I'm sure he'll correct himself." Poseidon said.

"You can try all you want, I will never bow to you." Athena replied.

"GOD!" Zeus thundered.

"How dare he call Kronos a god! Why I should blast him off Olympus for even thinking so!" Zeus went on

"Oh shut up Zeus, I'm sure he will correct himself, I want to see Athena bow to me!"

"You have quite a talent to anger the gods don't you Percy." Nico asked.

"Well, it's a specialty." Percy answered.

"That it is Percy, that it is."

"God?" Mr. Brunner asked.

"Titan, " I corrected myself.

"See. He corrected himself." Poseidon said feeling very proud. Zeus grumbled wile Athena said, "Let's see if he gets the rest of the question correct."

"And ... He didn't trust his kids, who were the gods. So, um, Kronos ate them, right? But his wife hid baby Zeus, and gave Kronos a rock to eat instead. And later, when Zeus grew up, he tricked his dad, Kronos, into barfing up his brothers and sisters-"

"See? You all owe your freedom to me!" Zeus said. Hermes feeling mischievous

"Oh, great Zeus thank you for freeing us! You are from now on our all-powerful King! We bow down to you!" Hermes declared and started worshipping Zeus.

Everybody started laughing. "Why are you laughing? You should bow down to me like my favorite son."

"Favorite son?" Apollo asked. "All bow to the all-powerful Zeus, god of the cosmos. We worship thee!" He slid off his throne, and joined Hermes. Everybody looked at the weirdly.

"O-kay? Why don't we start reading?" Percy asked.

"Eeew!" said one of the girls behind me.

"Well you weren't there!" Hera screeched. "Talk about family, eat your own children! Unacceptable!"

"Yes, go Hera, maybe you can knock some sense into father." Zeus cheered.

"I think you forget Zeus, after all you did eat Athena's mother." Hades reminded him.

"WHAT? Father!" Athena shrieked.

"Yes, Zeus can you not eat her up as well, I'm getting tired of having to see her every day of my immortal life."

"Well I wish Kronos had kept you inside his stomach! Would have saved us a lot of trouble!"

"In a fight, who do you think is going to win? Poseidon or Athena?" Apollo asked Hermes.

"What kind of question is that? Of course I am! Owl head can't compare to my awesomeness!" Poseidon answered.

"Oh yes some awesomeness you have." Zeus muttered sarcastically.

"Why thank you for agreeing with me, brother." Poseidon said.

"Wow, Zeus saying Poseidon is awesome, the world's coming to an end." Apollo remarked.

"-and so there was this big fight between the gods and the Titans, " I continued, "and the gods won."

"He answered the question correct!" Hermes announced. Poseidon stood up proudly, and summoned a lush green carpet.

"Come on Athena, bow down, I even summoned a nice carpet." Poseidon smirked.

"Hephaestus, get the camera! I want to record this and see it every day for the rest of my life! Athena bows down to Poseidon! Oh we should play this segment on Hephaestus TV and have the whole mythical world watch!" Apollo suggested.

"No! No cameras! Nobody is going to see this!" Athena shouted.

""Now, now I don't think we should deprive the people of such a glorious moment, Hephaestus, get the cameras out!" Poseidon exclaimed. Hephaestus obeyed.

"I think camp half-blood should see it as well." Hephaestus suggested

Athena looked horrified, "NO!"

"Yes!" Poseidon shouted.

"Come on!"

"BOW, BOW, BOW!" The room chanted.

"I can't believe that Athena's going to bow to dad! I can't wait to live this over Annabeth. And it's all because of me!" Percy shouted.

Athena pressured by her rashness, stepped off her throne and walked over to Poseidon, she swallowed visibly seeing Poseidon grin ear to ear. She tried to bend down but her back was fixed, un moving. She then tried again and bend low to bow to her enemy.

Cheers went up in the room, this day was marked on the calendar, it was recorded on the cameras and then put on Hephaestus TV,

Shown on the city of Olympus.

The Hephaestus TV all of a sudden turned on, ad showed a video of Athena bowing to Poseidon.

The people that were walking about dropped whatever they doing and gaped at the screen. A satyr who was eating a churro dropped it in mid bite. Everybody then stared at the screen then some minor gods started paying drachmas to the other.

Shown in Atlantis

Amphitrite was having some nail polish put on her hands, when all of a sudden there was the TV turning on of its own accord. It showed a video of Athena bowing at Poseidon.

The maiden putting nail polish on her hands was so surprised she painted her hands purple. Next to her Triton was eating some ambrosia and as he saw the video he started choking. "Is that Athena?" He asked

Amphitrite nodded.

"Whoo!" Triton shouted and cheers could be heard throughout the palace.

"Woo, go dad!"

Shown in camp half-blood (From demigods time)

Everybody in camp half-blood was having a nice and peaceful dinner. When all of a sudden a TV propped out of nowhere. The stolls got mischievous looks in their eyes.

"Looks like the gods want to show us something important. Let's see." Chiron announced. Jake Mason a Hephaestus camper got up and turned it on.

Then came on a video of Poseidon grinning triumphantly and 'was that Athena?' bowing to him?

"I… Is that mom?" Malcolm asked.

Chiron looked and then nodded.

Drop dead silence. Everyone just stared at the screen.

"Athena bowing to Poseidon?!" The stolls asked.

"Kelp brain's never going to let you live this one down Princess." Clarisse taunted. "I have to give credit to kelp head's father for coming up with this one, Athena just lost all her honor!"

"The world's coming to an end, Athena bowed to Poseidon!" The stolls declared.

"Aww man, now I don't get to finish my pie." Pollux complained as he looked sadly towards his pie.

The Athena table was still quiet.

"This is really happening." Annabeth kept on chanting. "Oh great, now Percy's never going to shut up!"

"That is your biggest worry, our mother just lost her honor, and look even Chiron can't hold it." Malcolm reprimanded pointing to Chiron. Who indeed was rolling on the floor with laughter. He got up wiping tears from his eyes, also did everyone else.

"Well that was entertaining, now let us go back to dinner and make sure to mark this day on your calendar." Chiron said.

That sent everybody to fits of laughter, while the Athena children wished they could turn invisible.

Back up on Olympus (in the past)

Everybody was still laughing, while Athena was bright red, on her throne trying to hide in the shadows, but even they seemed to be avoiding her, she glowered at Hades.

He just mouthed back "Bow to me as well" She glared.

"Hermes, where did you show the video?" Athena asked fearing the answer.

"Well, out on Olympus, Atlantis cos of Uncle P and camp Half-blood, in the future!" Herms answered cheerfully. Athena paled, her life was over, nobody was ever going to let this down.

"Well, now should we continue?" Nico asked. Everybody nodded with occasional laughs and smirks sent to Athena.

Some snickers from the group.

Behind me, Nancy Bobofit mumbled to a friend, "Like we're going to use this in real life. Like it's going to say on our job applications, 'Please explain why Kronos ate his kids. '"

"And just for saying that I think we should call her here for a job interview." Hermes announced.

"A wha-" Zeus didn't get to finish his sentence because suddenly he was in mortal's clothes and Olympus looked like an examination room.

"HERMES!" Zeus shouted.

"Hey the name's Bob!" Hermes replied.

"What?"

"Shh, we're having a job interview with Miss Bobofit." Hermes answered in a very businesslike manner.

"What a job interview? I haven't even finished high school!" A feminine voice came out. Every body's heads snapped towards the voice, and they found a heavily freckled, red haired girl in their midst.

"Oh great! Now it's going to be just like another lesson with newton!" Nico complained.

"Who are you?" The girl asked.

"Nancy?" Percy asked.

"Yes, and you are?"

"Nobody, nobody." He didn't want to tell her who he was.

"Look, you are here for a job interview, and we are the interviewers. Got it? Now first question."

"Wait. I didn't apply for a job, why would I any way I have money." Nancy snarled

Artemis and Athena wrinkled their noses at this comment.

"Well you see, your father…. Wanted you to get a job.. so he applied for you?" Hermes tried explaining.

"My father would have told me for such a thing."

"Look missy; just give the darn interview so that we can go back to our lives, without you!" Hades blew up and glares pointedly at Hermes who grinned back sheepishly.

"Okay, okay I'll give the interview."

"Okay first question, why did Kronos eat his kids?" 'Bob' asked

"What?" Nancy asked

"Clearly you aren't prepared, what a shame. Okay next question: Why does Zeus have a big head?"

"WHAT?" This time Zeus joined in.

"Lady, try to score some marks, any way the correct answer is because he needs to fill it with more brain. Next question: Who is smarter Aphrodite or Athena?"

"Obviously it's me." Athena boasted

"I wouldn't be so sure Bird brain!" Poseidon shot.

"What?" Nancy asked

"Really is that all you can answer? The correct answer is: Nobody, because both are idiots. Next question: Who is more handsome, Apollo or Hermes?"

"Okay what kind of a question is that? And what kind of nut ball job did my father have me apply for?!"

"I'll have you know it is a very esteemed job to be the housekeeping at Olympus…industries, you have to keep up with the gossip and the question is very valid. Now answer."

"I have never even met these people!"

"Would a picture help? A really nice picture."

"Look, there is no way I Nancy Bobofit am going to work as housekeeping for Olympus industries. I don't do lowly jobs."

"You think working for the g… CEO of Olympus industries is lowly? How dare you!"

"Her- Bob, get her out of here before he blows!" Artemis shrieked.

"It's been nice knowing you, we'll send you a text if you get the job, bye." And Hermes flashed Nancy out.

"How dare she!" Zeus kept on.

"Zeus calm down she's gone, just an ignorant mortal. Don't blow your top over it and fry us please!" Hera begged.

"Fine but if I ever see her again…." He left the sentence hanging.

"Well she's even worse in person." Thalia remarked.

"Yeah well at least you didn't have to put up with her for a year." Percy replied.

"Yeah man I pity you. It's worse than the fields of punishment." Nico said.

"Yeah it was, now let's get the second torture out of the way as well."

"Oh that's not going anywhere any time soon."

"And why, Mr. Jackson, " Brunner said, "to paraphrase Miss Bobofit's excellent question, does this matter in real life?"

"Darn! I should have waited! There is no way in Hades he knew that? Such an Idiot, i̱líthios (idiot)"

"Wait, wait, wait did Athena just call herself idiot?" Apollo asked, and he was met with the nodding of heads.

"Alert the Presses! Pallas Athena just called herself an idiot! We need to mark this on the calendar, make it an international holiday! Wooo!" Apollo shouted.

"Sit down Apollo! And let's finish at least the chapter today!" Dionysus yelled at him, gods he was tired of the noise.

"You know I don't think Apollo's idea was half bad." Poseidon mused.

"Right with ya dad!"

"Busted, " Grover muttered.

"Finally a teacher caught her!" Thalia cheered.

"You do know that we are no closer to finishing this chapter than we are from making Artemis embrace love, right?" Dionysus asked. "If you do want to finish it I shall give the wonderful suggestion that has not crossed anybody's mind, to shut up!"

Everybody looked at Dionysus, what was his problem? Ares decided to voice everybody's thoughts

"What's your problem grape head?"

"I just want some peace and quiet and these irksome demigods out of here!"

"Hey!" came a shout of protest from the demigods

"Let's just keep reading, Dionysus is right at this speed we would have to make the demigods immortal as well." Hephaestus agreed with Dionysus.

"Shut up, " Nancy hissed, her face even brighter red than her hair.

"Now that is a sight not to miss!" Thalia said.

"I wonder what it would look like." Nico speculated. Then he closed his eyes like he was imagining it. Then, "AAHHHH! Disturbing picture, disturbing picture, get it out, get it out!"

"You could get it out if you stop imagining it!" Percy yelled at him.

"Oh, thanks."

"Percy rolled his eyes.

At least Nancy got packed, too. Mr. Brunner was the only one who ever caught her saying anything wrong. He had radar ears.

"Now he sounds even more familiar." Nico said. "I know that I know him, just can't get the name!"

"I know it is so annoying!" Thalia complained.

"Shall I put you out of your misery?" Percy asked.

"No! I will find the answer myself! Even if it's the last thing I do!" Thalia replied with determination.

"Whoa, Thalia sounds like you're going on a quest." Percy said.

"Well I'm taking a quest to depths of my memory to find the answer!"

"You do know that you could just ask me, or that you're going to find out who he is in a chapter or two?" Percy asked with weird look on his face.

Thalia blushed, "I knew that."

"Sure you did."

I thought about his question, and shrugged. "I don't know, sir. "

"Grrr, if I had just waited!" Athena screamed.

"Now I have to live with the shame! I have fish head's gloating fish forever! Why?! Why are the fates so cruel?! Why?!" Athena sobbed, sinking off her throne to the floor. "Why?! I can't live with this! I'll be ridiculed my whole life! My life has been ruined!"

"Oh such a pity!" Poseidon said sarcastically looking at the video again.

"Shut up, fish breath!"

"Dude you're getting this on camera right?" Hermes asked Hephaestus. " Every bit!" He replied.

"Ooooh this is going to be Olympic comedy gold!" Hermes announced.

Artemis got off her throne and consoled Athena, "Shhh, it's okay, I'm sure you'll get the chance to ridicule Poseidon as well, come on up, onto the throne."

"You're right Artemis, now I'll take every chance there is to embarrass Poseidon." Athena promised. Poseidon gulped.

"I see. " Mr. Brunner looked disappointed. "Well, half credit, Mr. Jackson. Zeus did indeed feed Kronos a mixture of mustard and wine, which made him disgorge his other five children, who, of course, being immortal gods, had been living and growing up completely undigested in the Titan's stomach. The gods defeated their father, sliced him to pieces with his own scythe, and scattered his remains in Tartarus, the darkest part of the Underworld.

"Well you know If I was a mortal, I'd say that that is totally not a very nice thing to do to your father, but I'm a demigod so I say spot on!" Percy said while his cousins nodded.

The big three eyed them suspiciously, especially Zeus.

"What?" Nico asked. They eyed them even more.

"Wait a minute you think you're going to do that to you? Well I have to admit, it's not a bad idea."

"Thalia!" Percy and Nico screamed as the big three looked at them with aa warning evident in their eyes.

"Wait no that's not what I meant!" Thalia tried to amend, "I was only joking, I swear on the river Styx that we have no intention of that." Thunder boomed overhead.

The big three backed off.

"Talk about trust issues." Nico said.

On that happy note, it's time for lunch. Mrs. Dodds, would you lead us back outside?"

"That is a happy note?" Apollo asked.

"Well, I guess it is happy since it shows that Kronos was defeated and a better era began?" Percy answered more like questioned.

Everybody stared at him.

"What?" He asked.

"Dude! You came up with a perfectly valid explanation which even Athena didn't come up with!" Nico said with an incredulous look on his face.

"Wow, I did didn't I?"

"Yeah."

"In your face Athena!"

"Oh one answer correct, now don't expect me to bow to you too."

"I didn't ask you too, I was just hoping you would see that I'm not stupid!" Percy replied his voice full with anger. Seriously what was her problem? It wasn't his fault she made the bet.

The class drifted off, the girls holding their stomachs, the guys pushing each other around and acting like doo-fuses.

"Why are they wasting their energy acting, they are doo- fuses." Artemis questioned.

"Thank you!" Percy said.

"What? She just called boys doo- fuses and you're cheering? What has gotten into you?"

"No, she said they were acting like doo-fuses, as in my class, which I whole heartedly agree with."

"Oh! You must really hate your class."

"You bet I do, it was literal hell there!"

"No, nothing is hell except for my prize possession, the fields of punishment!" Hades said. Everybody looked at him.

"What?"

"Your prize possession is the fields of torture?" Hermes asked. Hades nodded. "Wow now that is sadistic."

"See what kind of mad man my daughter lives with! He gets pleasure from hearing people suffer!" Demeter screamed

Zeus rubbed his temples, from hearing this fight too many times, "Demeter now is not the time to argue, please let's just continue the book!"

Demeter glared but relented.

Grover and I were about to follow when Mr. Brunner said, "Mr. Jackson. "

"Mr. Jackson, you are in trouble." Nico tried mimicking a teacher.

"Don't you know better than to go off huzzaing when you know you should study? Very bad, you are indeed in trouble." Thalia joined in.

"Knock it off guys! I'm always in trouble, what else is new?" Percy said.

"Well that's true." Nico agreed.

Poseidon felt worried for his son, "Son, just how much trouble are you normally in?"

"It's better not to ask, dad" Percy answered

"Great, just great."

"Isn't it?"

I knew that was coming.

"How? Did you use psychic powers? Are you the next oracle? Yes it's finally changing bodies; I have no idea what's wrong with it. This is amazing!" Apollo asked.

"Whoa there, slow down. No and no, I didn't use any powers nor am I the next Oracle, I only knew it because I'm so used to this I knew it was coming."

"Oh, okay" Apollo looked really disheartened.

"But maybe in the future somebody else may take the post." Percy tried to cheer him up.

Apollo's smile brightened, "Yeah thanks."

I told Grover to keep going. Then I turned toward Mr. Brunner. "Sir?"

Mr. Brunner had this look that wouldn't let you go- intense brown eyes that could've been a thousand years old and had seen everything.

"A thousand years old and have seen everything you say?" Hermes asked.

"Yeah." Percy answered

"Grr, why can't I figure it out? Why is this character so complicated? Why won't my brain work?" Hermes asked puling on his hair.

"Wait, wait, wait, you have a brain? I thought that skull of yours was empty." Athena asked

"Yes, I do have a brain, where do you think all the awesome and mischievous ideas come from?"

"I thought you hired someone to give ideas, I still think you hired someone." Athena replied.

"Well, I do have a brain, and if you're so smart then why don't you tell us who this character is?"

"Well it hasn't come to me yet-"

"HA!"

"But, but I'll figure it out soon."

"Sure you will Athena, sure you will."

"You must learn the answer to my question, " Mr. Brunner told me.

"About the Titans?"

"Seriously, you're still on that right now?" Artemis asked. "And people wonder why I say boys are stupid."

"HEY!" came from all the boys in the room.

"Well you know it's true!"

"Hey!" came again from every boy.

"Hey, cut me some slack, I didn't know this crazy world existed back then." Percy said.

"Crazy?! We are not crazy! Okay maybe Apollo, Artemis, Ares, Athena, Aphrodite, Hephaestus, Zeus, Hera, Hades, Demeter, Poseidon and Demeter are a bit crazy, but still we don't qualify for crazy."

The demigods gave him an incredulous look

"Ok maybe we are crazy, but where's the fun without crazy?"

"About real life. And how your studies apply to it. "

"Well, these studies are important." Thalia said.

"Do my ears deceive me? The rebellious Thalia Grace is saying that studies are important?" Percy asked looking shocked.

"Shut up you know these studies are important."

"Yeah, but we thought that Green Day and cheese burgers were important to you." Nico said.

"Well lifesaving studies are important, but I guess you're right, Green Day and Cheese burgers trump studies."

"Oh."

Clapping ensued. Percy looked at his cousins weirdly.

"Behold, Gods and Goddesses, the famous and signature answer of Percy Jackson, 'oh'" Nico announced.

"You know I was thinking-" Percy started but was cut off by Thalia.

"You can think?" Thalia asked. Percy ignored her.

"That I have 2 wonderful cousins who will definitely deserve to be on the wrong end of riptide if they don't shut up!"

The 2 cousins shut up.

"What you learn from me, "he said, "is vitally important. I expect you to treat it as such. I will accept only the best from you, Percy Jackson. "

"He expects the best from you Percy, better hit the books." Thalia encouraged.

"Yeah you don't want to let your tutor down who works extremely hard on your lessons." Nico agreed.

"Shut up, I'll have you know I got a solid C- on that exam." Percy said

"Yeah but your tutor would prefer if you got a solid A, on you exam" Thalia argued.

"You do know that this happened about 5 years ago and none of this matters anymore?" Percy asked.

"Yes, but you should always impress your teachers, read Nico." Thalia said closing the matter.

I wanted to get angry, this guy pushed me so hard.I mean, sure, it was kind of cool on tournament days, when he dressed up in a suit of Roman armor

The gods shared a look.

"Are you sure it was roman armor?" Athena asked.

"I'm not sure, could've been Greek, I didn't know the difference, I didn't pay much attention in class."

Athena glared at him, "You should pay attention."

"Not to worry Athena, I'm very sure that Percy pay rapt attention to his teacher now." Thalia said.

"Ah, good, you finally learn the importance of education."

"More like he has to pay attention or he gets a slap." Nico whispered to Thalia. They snickered as Percy glared venomously.

And shouted: "What ho!'" and challenged us, sword-point against chalk,

"That would be fun." Hermes said.

"It was but it was a bit weird." Percy replied

"The mortals?"

"Oh, no they loved it, it was me who thought it was a bit weird.'

"Why?"

"Well it was cos he always brought me to the fight."

"Oh so you were scared."

"No! I just normally lost and I thought it was weird, sword against chalk?"

"I guess."

to run to the board and name every Greek and Roman per-son who had ever lived, and their mother, and what god they worshipped.

"Now that is hard. Even I can't do that! How in the world did this man know about them?" Athena admitted.

"Wait, she just admitted that she couldn't do this, right or is it just my ears ringing?" Hermes asked Apollo.

"She admitted it." Apollo answered.

Hermes flashed into a news anchor's suit, "Ladies and gentlemen, I Hermes bring you the breaking news, the world is coming to an end as we speak. Today there have been many out of the ordinary events, 1st Athena bowed to Poseidon, 2nd Athena started crying 3rd Athena calls herself an idiot and last but not least Athena admits that what something that a seemingly mortal can do she cannot. Do you think the world is coming to an end these events seem to say so. I Hermes from Hephaestus TV and good night."

"The world will not end if I cannot do something!"

"It will if you admit it. And now that I have fulfilled my duty to the world to tell them the latest news, let's get on with the story." Hermes said

But Mr. Brunner expected me to be as good as everybody else, despite the fact that I have dyslexia and attention deficit disorder and I had never made above a C- in my life.

"What?! That teacher must have been blind to see that there is absolutely no potential in you, yet you are his star student? What about the rest of the class?! C-! that is your best result, I feel sorry for your mother! " Athena chastised.

Percy was furious, "Okay what is your problem? So what If I can't get a good result? My mother never had a problem with it! In case you haven't noticed I have dyslexia and ADHD so it is rather hard! Besides it's not my fault that you made a stupid bet and wounded your pride because you were too rash. I don't care, for me, I care more for my life than just a stupid grade, so if you've got a problem take it up with someone ELSE!"

Athena shut up. So did the throne room.

"Can I continue?" Nico asked.

"Continue" Percy said curtly

No-he didn't expect me to be as good; he expected me to be better. And I just couldn't learn all those names and facts, much less spell them correctly.

Percy looked pointedly at Athena. She wisely didn't say anything.

"Is dyslexia really that bad?" Demeter asked

"Yes, yes it is." Percy answered.

The gods felt bad for putting their children through this trouble.

I mumbled something about trying harder, while Mr. Brunner took one long sad look at the stele, like he'd been at this girl's funeral.

"You should try harder." Athena mumbled.

"Why does he look like he was at this girl's funeral?" Hestia asked.

"This man is either from our world or a very dedicated teacher." Hephaestus deducted.

"I still feel like I should know this man, very well." Nico said. "Any hints?"

"It's either the answer or nothing." Percy replied.

A groan went out through the room. Percy loved the feeling of being the only one who knew. It was a nice change.

He told me to go outside and eat my lunch.

The class gathered on the front steps of the museum, where we could watch the foot traffic along Fifth Avenue.

"So interesting watching traffic, they should make a movie out of it , it would sell millions." Hermes said.

"This book is boring! When's the action going to pick up? I'm nearly bored to death. I need guns and swords and weapons and blood and gore and death and fights and soldiers and the thrill of war"

"And you people say I'm sadistic." Hades muttered, as everybody just stared at Ares.

"Dude, are you okay?" Hermes asked Ares.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the god of war." Hephaestus clapped, enjoying every bit of Ares's troubles.

Ares was furious how dare repair boy insult him?

"Ladies and gentlemen, the god of Forges and repair boys, who can't make enough of an effort to comb his hair or even fight for his wife."

"Burn!" Apollo shouted.

"The god of war who cares of nothing but himself and lives on the death of the humans, who makes wars happen, which cause misery for his own personal entertainment." Hephaestus retorted.

"The god of Forges, who is so disrespected that he was thrown off of Olympus not once but twice, has a face not even a mother could love and has to hide behind machines because he can't show his ugly face." Ares shot back.

The throne room was quiet.

Hephaestus looked beyond furious, he was livid. Hephaestus conjured a fire ball and chucked it at Ares, whose glasses caught fire and melted.

Ares started getting up from his throne, when grapevines wrapped around his waist and pulled him down.

"Listen hear war brain, we do not want fights and would like to finish the chapter today please, so unless you want to see how far your madness goes I suggest you cool off." Dionysus threatened. Ares gulped and nodded. Dionysus then winked at Hephaestus who nodded back.

Overhead, a huge storm was brewing, with clouds blacker than I'd ever seen over the city.

Instantaneously every body's head turned to Zeus.

"What?" Zeus asked. Every body's head turned to the book and back to him.

"You seriously think I have something to do with it? Come on! Every time there's a storm everybody turns to me, it's not my fault you know."

"Oh, I'm sure it's not your fault god of the sky & storms." Hades replied.

"Ok, maybe it was me, but how am I supposed to know what's going on? Ask the demigods."

Everybody turned to Percy, who answered, "My lips are sealed shut."

A collective groan went over the room.

I figured maybe it was global warming or something, because the weather all across New York state had been weird since Christmas.

"Oh dear Zeus's got his toga in a twist." Demeter sighed.

"Zeus's always got his toga in a twist, what else is new?" Hades asked.

"I do not have my toga in a twist!" Zeus protested.

"Really dad? No point is lying, remember that one time, that son of Hephaestus that asked you how you made your bolt and you turned him into a cloud?" Hermes reminded. Hephaestus heard this and glared.

"Well it's not my fault that demigod, asked me the secret to my bolt to make illegal copies and topple me off my throne." Zeus defended.

"And you people say I'm paranoid." Hades remarked.

"Really dad?" Thalia asked.

"What?"

"Nothing, read Nico."

We'd had massive snow storms, flooding, wildfires from lightning strikes. I wouldn't have been surprised if this was a hurri-cane blowing in.

"Well see I'm not the only one who's got his toga in a twist." Zeus said, looking pointedly at Poseidon.

"Well unlike you Zeus, I possess a brain and only punish when needed." Poseidon replied.

"Sure, like how you punish Athens? Real reason you have there. By the way 'brain' is my department and I'm sure as hell, that I would not gift someone as pathetic as you with a brain." Athena remarked.

"Well you must be mistaken, because I do possess a brain, as for Athens they do not appreciate the sea, so they get no sympathy from me." Poseidon retorted.

"Shut up! What I want to know is why my idiot brothers are fighting?" Demeter asked.

"You know at the rate you fight, I'm not surprised that there was a fight in the future. I mean the back and forth in front of between today is enough to cause enough disaster, so I don't know how you find this fight any more new." Nico said thoughtfully.

He had 12 pairs of incredulous eyes on him, but he started reading before anybody could object.

Nobody else seemed to notice. Some of the guys were pelting pigeons with Lunchables crackers.

"You expect us to sit back when nature is being abused like this huh?" Demeter asked while Artemis looked murderous.

"Such a pity, it's not like the crackers are food to the pigeons. No we should put these horrible mortals into Tartarus for committing such a crime." Hades said, his words dripping with sarcasm. Demeter blushed and glared like nobody's business.

Nancy Bobofit was trying to pickpocket something from a lady's purse, and, of course, Mrs. Dodds wasn't seeing a thing.

"Seriously what is it with this teacher? I'm ready to bet that she's something from the depths of Tartarus." Thalia said, seething.

Nico and Percy locked eyes and Percy said, "Well you're not far from the truth Thalia."

"Of course she isn't who ever thought that a Math teacher would be even remotely kind? She basically lives to torture." Apollo exclaimed.

"Quite true." Ares agreed

"Hermes is Nancy yours?" Artemis asked.

"Hades no! It says she was trying, my children could do it in their sleep." Hermes said proudly.

Everybody wondered if that was something to be proud of or not.

Grover and I sat on the edge of the fountain, away from the others. We thought that maybe if we did that, everybody wouldn't know we were from that school-the school for loser freaks who couldn't make it elsewhere.

"Oh sure that's going to work, two children sitting near a bunch of unruly school kids, with just pigeons between them, very distinguishing." Thalia said.

"In case you didn't notice nobody asked for your opinion." Percy retorted.

"Did you really feel that way?" Poseidon asked.

Percy looked up, " Well you see, it's not exactly to flaunt that you belong in a school for freaks." He answered looking sheepish.

"Well Patrick you go to a camp for freaks, how does that fit?" Dionysus asked.

"Two of those freaks happen to be your children, nephew." Poseidon snarled, while all of the gods and demigods alike glared. Even ones who didn't have children.

"Detention?" Grover asked.

"How it is that, he immediately thought of detention." Nico asked

"Well I did get into trouble lot, wouldn't have been the first time I got detention, along with other dangers I have also braved detention a whole month." Percy replied.

"That's not exactly something to be proud of." Athena reprimanded.

Percy ignored her.

"Nah, " I said. "Not from Brunner. I just wish he'd lay off me sometimes. I mean-I'm not a genius. "

"Truer words have never been spoken." Thalia said.

"I know, it's just weird thinking Percy to even remotely be smart and strategic." Nico closed his eyes and imagined only to shiver and start screaming, "MENTAL PICTURE, GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD!"

Percy proceeded to whack him on his head, he calmed down and started to read.

Grover didn't say anything for a while. Then, when I thought he was going to give me some deep philosophical comment to make me feel better, he said, "Can I have your apple?"

Everybody burst out laughing, it took the quite a while to calm down.

"Some philosophical comment, it should go down in one of those literature books like those books of the ancient scientists who studied the stars 'Are we human because we gaze at the stars or do we ask 'can I have your apple' that makes us human?" Hermes said with a complete poker face. (A\N can anyone guess where this line is from?)

Everybody burst out laughing.

I didn't have much of an appetite, so I let him take it.

"Wait, wait, wait, did I hear correct? Percy doesn't have an appetite? What is the world coming too?" Thalia cried dramatically.

"It can happen that I don't feel hungry!" Percy protested.

"Percy, your stomach is like a black hole that is never filled." Nico said.

"It is not!"

"I remember this one time, Percy, me and Thalia were at his house and his mom was working, there was nothing in the fridge, so we decided to order pizza, the took a long while getting here and Percy got so desperate that he started eating the onions and carrots wiping, the veggies clean and even ate the box of homemade frosting he had and still had space in his stomach for half the pizza!" Nico finished.

Percy blushed a dark shade of red while every deity in the room gave him incredulous looks.

I watched the stream of cabs going down Fifth Avenue, and thought about my mom's apartment, only a little ways uptown from where we sat. I hadn't seen her since Christmas.

"That was a long while for you, we all know for a fact that you cannot stay far from your mother." Thalia said.

Hera looked surprised, "Are you saying that the boy actually cares for his mother?"

"I love my mother!"

"Well you should all follow his example, everybody should care for their mother." Hera said looking pointedly at Ares and Hephaestus.

"I would but you through me off a Olympus!"

"I would look like a wimp if I showed emotion."

"Well the demigod here doesn't look like a wimp, how is that?" Hera asked.

"Puh lease, look at the boys wimpy arms, I'm surprised he can even hold a sword." Ares retorted

"I bet I can hold a sword better than you!" Percy replied.

"Better than the god of war?! We'll see about that!"

"Ok, if I haven't beaten you by the end of the book, be it mentioned in the book, I will be your personal servant, I swear on the Styx!" Percy bet, thunder boomed overhead.

"Fine, and if you do beat me by the end of the book, be it in the book, I will dress up in a pink fluffy kitten costume, I swear on the Styx!" Ares agreed with another thunder clap.

"Perce you sure you know what you're doing?" Nico asked worriedly.

"Trust me I know exactly what I'm doing."

I wanted so bad to jump in a taxi and head home. She'd hug me and be glad to see me, but she'd be disappointed, too. She'd send me right back to Yancy, remind me that I had to try harder, even if this was my sixth school in six years and I was probably going to be kicked out again. I wouldn't be able to stand that sad look she'd give me.

Artemis raised her eyebrows, could this boy be different?

"SOOOOOOOOOOO swweeeeeeeeettt!" Aphrodite squealed, deafening everybody else.

"Hey Aph, I know it's sweet and everything, but would mind not bursting everbody's eardrum?" Apollo asked

Hermes however was on a different line, "So wait, you got kicked out of how many schools?"

"Six, up till then." Percy replied looking sheepish.

"Wow, that's a new record."

Percy merely grinned.

"See, that's how you should feel of your mother, you dimwit!" Hera scolded Ares, "You could learn something from him!"

Ares glared at Percy while Percy flashed him a grin.

Mr. Brunner parked his wheelchair at the base of the handicapped ramp. He ate celery while he read a paperback novel. A red umbrella stuck up from the back of his chair, making it look like a motorized cafe table.

"Ooh, that sounds interesting, I should make it!" Hephaestus mused.

"How you find machines more interesting than people, I will never know." Artemis said.

"I don't know, maybe it's because nobody respects me, or gives the time or if they do it is just to make fun of my appearance. I really don't know. With machines you don't have to worry about what they might think."

Everybody felt a little bad for how they treated Hephaestus, in a way his awkwardness around people was because of them.

Nico took the silence as a chance to continue.

I was about to unwrap my sandwich when Nancy Bobofit appeared in front of me with her ugly friends-I guess she'd gotten tired of stealing from the tourists-and dumped her half-eaten lunch in Grover's lap.

Thalia tried to stay calm but was having trouble doing so.

"Thalia stay calm, stay calm," Percy tried.

"I AM CALM!" "That little brat better be sorry, or mortal or not, she's going to be electrified like no tomorrow!" Thalia yelled.

"Thalia I'm sure she'll be sorry, please stop creating a tornado!" Nico cried.

Thalia heard this and calmed down, but starting muttering tortures that made Hades pale.

"Nico continue." Percy ordered.

I tried to stay cool. The school counselor had told me a million times, "Count to ten, get control of your temper.

"That's what I'm trying to do, doesn't work." Thalia said.

But I was so mad my mind went blank. A wave roared in my ears.

"That's what usually happens, you have anger management issues." Nico said.

"Who cares? The brat's about to get packed! I can't wait! Read Nico, READ!" Thalia shouted.

Nico read.

I don't remember touching her, but the next thing I knew, Nancy was sitting on her butt in the fountain, screaming, "Percy pushed me!"

"That's it? That is your big revenge, pushing her in the fountain? So anticlimactic." Thalia moaned.

"Just wait Thalia; I happened to do it with style!" Percy said.

"Well I hope so."

Mrs. Dodds materialized next to us.

Some of the kids were whispering: "Did you see-"

"-the water-"

"-like it grabbed her-"

"Nice, finally you put your powers to good use!" Thalia exclaimed.

"I have to agree with the girl here, nice job! Nancy got packed!"

Everybody was celebrating.

"Okay, I'm happy that you enjoyed Nancy's misery, but can we please continue?" Percy asked.

I didn't know what they were talking about. All I knew was that I was in trouble again.

"You never know what the heck is happening and you're always in trouble." Nico said.

"Gee, thanks for the support." Percy said sarcastically.

"Do you really get into that much trouble?" Poseidon asked fearing the answer.

"Oh Uncle P you don't know the half of it." Thalia said.

Poseidon looked at his son, who in turn grinned back sheepishly.

"Great, just great."

As soon as Mrs. Dodds was sure poor little Nancy was okay, promising to get her a new shirt at the museum gift shop, etc. , etc.

"Oh yeah, poor little Nancy who got pushed into a fountain because of being an obnoxious jerk, poor little Nancy." Nico said.

"You know I think Mrs. Dodds has something wrong with her eyes, she only sees what she wants to. And it's your luck that it's you." Hermes concluded.

"You're quite right, she only saw what she was looking for." Percy said ominously.

"I'm right? See that Athena I do have a brain!" Hermes shouted.

"Are you saying that you were under the impression you didn't have a brain?" Athena asked.

"Err… yes….wait, NO!"

"I'll take that as a yes."

Mrs. Dodds turned on me. There was a triumphant fire in her eyes, as if I'd done something she'd been waiting for all semester.

"Sounds a bit like she's a stalker, who's been waiting for you to prove something, so she can make her decision, on your identity." Apollo said.

"You don't know how right you are Apollo." Percy said

"She's a stalker?"

"Yeah you could say that."

"Well she's one ugly stalker."

"What does that have to be with stalking?" Artemis asked.

"Well, if someone was stalking me, I would want them to be at least good looking." Apollo asked.

"That's stupid."

"Well I didn't ask for your opinion."

"Now, honey-"

"I know, " I grumbled. "A month erasing workbooks. "

"NO! You idiot! You never, I repeat, never guess your punishment! That's rule no. 3!" Hermes yelled.

"I didn't know you had a rule book." Athena said.

"Well, of course I have a rule book, being something akin to Hermes isn't easy! It's like passing a college course. You have to have passion for the crime, you study the rule book, understand it, learn it by heart and you love it. This requires dedication." Hermes ranted.

"Whoa! Who thought that being a Hermes kid required all that?" Percy said.

That wasn't the right thing to say.

"Exactly what I was trying to convey." Hermes said.

"We get that Hermes you don't need to go on a rant again." Zeus said.

"But I was just proving my point!" Hermes protested.

"I think you proved your point when you were ranting."

"Come with me, " Mrs. Dodds said.

"Wait!" Grover yelped. "It was me. I pushed her. "

I stared at him, stunned. I couldn't believe he was trying to cover for me. Mrs. Dodds scared Grover to death.

"He's just being a good friend." Demeter said.

"Yeah well, it was surprising because Mrs. Dodds scared Grover to hell and back."

"He was still being a good friend and you would understand that if you ate more cereal."

"Enough with the cereal woman! You're not trying to kill us are you?" Hades yelled.

"See, what kind of a psycho he is!"

Hades looked angry. They wouldn't be surprised if there was steam coming out of his ears; instead Hades simply snapped his fingers and Demeter into a clown.

Demeter glared, but it wasn't all that scary. Hades reached over and tooted her clown nose. Demeter tried to change but the clothes stayed.

"They're non changeable." Hades smirked, looking smug.

She glared at him so hard his whiskery chin trembled.

Everybody laughed so hard their stomachs ached.

"Gods, I would pay a million dollars to see that." Thalia exclaimed.

When everybody calmed down Nico started reading.

"I don't think so, Mr. Underwood, " she said.

"But-"

"You-will-stay-here."

"Oh that scared him alright." Thalia said.

"I'm really starting to doubt this teacher's Human ness, she sounds more like a monster to me." Hephaestus said.

Everybody looked at him, how they could have not noticed it was a monster.

"Is it a monster?" Poseidon asked worriedly

"My lips are sealed." Percy answered.

"I hate those words."

"I know."

Grover looked at me desperately.

"It's okay, man, " I told him. "Thanks for trying. "

"Well he has to try, it is his job." Thalia said.

"I didn't know that back then." Percy retorted.

"Oh like you know anything now."

"I happen to know a lot, thank you very much."

"Like?"

"How to anger the gods 101."

The demigods laughed, while the gods thought anger the gods 101, surely that's just a joke right?

"That's a joke right?" Hera asked.

"Nope, he does know how to enrage you guys really well."

The boy has a death wish. Everybody thought.

"Honey, " Mrs. Dodds barked at me. "Now. "

Nancy Bobofit smirked.

"Oh please can someone kill her?" Thalia asked. "I'm telling you that it will most definitely not be a crime."

"I'll kill her! I need more action!" Ares offered.

"Anyone beside Ares? How about you dad?"

"Wha- me? Why me?" Zeus asked.

"Don't you like to zap mortals for fun with your lightning bolt?" Thalia asked.

Zeus looked at a loss for what to say, while his brothers howled with laughter.

"She speaks true." Poseidon said.

"I do not zap mortals for fun!" Zeus defended.

"Then what about that guy you zapped yesterday?" Ares asked.

This sent everybody into more fits of laughter.

I gave her my deluxe I'll-kill-you-later stare.

"Be it's not as good as mine." Ares boasted.

"Nope it's better." Nico answered.

"You twit." Ares gave them his deluxe I'll kill you later stare. A few gods were affected.

"Mine is better." Zeus boasted. Zeus gave them his stare. Almost all the gods were affected.

"That's nothing, check mine out!" Hades said giving them his stare. They had to say that was scary.

"My turn." Percy said busing out his stare. Everybody was sure to have nightmares.

"Now that is scary." Demeter said.

Then I turned to face Mrs. Dodds, but she wasn't there. She was standing at the museum entrance, way at the top of the steps, gesturing impatiently at me to come on.

How'd she get there so fast?

"Because she's a ninja and she was wearing those skates that had rockets behind them." Hermes suggested.

"Or maybe, she's a monster." Artemis said, sounding exasperated.

"I like my explanation better." Hermes said.

I have moments like that a lot, when my brain falls asleep or something, and the next thing I know I've missed something, as if a puzzle piece fell out of the universe and left me staring at the blank place behind it.

"Your brain's always asleep." Thalia said.

"Yeah especially when Annabeth is teaching you something, you zone off and the she whacks you in the head with a dictionary." Nico said.

Percy blushed, "Shut up."

"See, it's not abnormal. Your brain falls asleep a lot." Thalia concluded.

The school counselor told me this was part of the ADHD, my brain misinterpreting things.

"No that's Percy's stupidity." Nico said.

"Gee, I just have the best cousins in the world who deserve to be on the pointy end of Riptide."

Said cousins shut up.

I wasn't so sure.

"Yeah, this time I don't think it's the boy's ADHD; I think this is a monster." Hera said.

Poseidon paled.

I went after Mrs. Dodds.

"No! Are you an idiot? This is a monster!" Athena screamed.

"Well, it's not like I had a choice, besides I didn't know this world existed back then." Percy shot back.

Athena looked embarrassed.

Halfway up the steps, I glanced back at Grover. He was looking pale, cutting his eyes between me and Mr. Brunner, like he wanted Mr. Brunner to notice what was going on, but Mr. Brunner was absorbed in his novel.

"What's Mr. Brunner going to do? He's a mortal." Poseidon asked

"Maybe he's clear sighted and can see Mrs. Dodds taking Percy and do something about it." Athena answered.

"Well then he should pay more attention to Percy than some stupid book."

"Books aren't stupid, they are life, and they make everything interesting."

"Well excuse me if I find my son's life more important than a book."

Athena huffed.

I looked back up. Mrs. Dodds had disappeared again. She was now inside the building, at the end of the entrance hall.

"She's getting excited." Hades said.

"What do you mean?" Apollo asked.

"Well she kept up appearance all semester long, but now since Percy's little stunt she didn't care to keep it up, meaning she's getting excited." Hades explained.

Okay, I thought. She's going to make me buy a new shirt for Nancy at the gift shop.

"Yeah uh…. I don't think so." Thalia said.

"More like she's going to make you buy a ticket to the underworld for yourself." Nico said.

"Well it's not like I knew that." Percy defended.

"You don't need to buy a ticket to the underworld; I can give it to you for free." Hades said like it was a bestselling offer.

"Uh yeah, I'll hold you to that." Percy said awkwardly.

But apparently that wasn't the plan.

I followed her deeper into the museum. When I finally caught up to her, we were back in the Greek and Roman section.

"Figures she would take you there." Artemis said.

Except for us, the gallery was empty.

"Great, she can get off clean, no witnesses, nothing connecting her to the murder scene, she could be Bigfoot for all we care and no one would notice." Poseidon said with worry lacing his words.

"What about Grover?" Hermes asked.

"Oh please, she'll do her kill before the goat can get his furry behind in there."

"It's nice to know how much faith you have in me dad." Percy said sarcastically.

"Sorry, I'm just worried."

"It's Ok, as you can see I'm perfectly fine."

"Too bad." Zeus muttered.

He got a room full of glares.

Mrs. Dodds stood with her arms crossed in front of a big marble frieze of the Greek gods. She was making this weird noise in her throat, like growling.

"If there was any doubt he was not a monster, there certainly isn't now" Apollo said.

"Finally! Some action! I was getting bored." Ares cheered.

"You do know that action just could get my son killed!" Poseidon yelled at him.

"So?"

"No point dad, he's always like this." Percy said trying to stop a fight.

Even without the noise, I would've been nervous. It's weird being alone with a teacher, especially Mrs. Dodds. Something about the way she looked at the frieze, as if she wanted to pulverize it...

"You've been giving us problems, honey," she said.

"See, you seem to bring trouble where ever you go!" Thalia pointed out.

"I ain't my fault that trouble seems to follow me everywhere." Percy retorted.

"Uh, it kinda is." Thalia said.

"Whatever, it is best you shut up or some little cat is going to be out of the bag."

Thalia narrowed her eyes but didn't say anything.

I did the safe thing. I said, "Yes, ma'am."

"That's the safe thing?" Nico asked incredulously.

"Well yeah, I mean he is admitting his mistake, is he not?" Apollo answered

"But that would get him into more trouble, it would be better if he just denied it."

"But if the teacher could prove he was lying, then he would be in more trouble."

She tugged on the cuffs of her leather jacket. "Did you really think you would get away with it?"

"Get away with what?" Poseidon asked.

Athena's mind went into overdrive, searching for an explanation but came up with nothing. For some reason the title kept coming into her mind, she didn't think much of it.

"Maybe he stole her spare leather jacket, now she's after him." Hermes offered an explanation.

Everybody looked at him weird, but he just shrugged it off.

The look in her eyes was beyond mad. It was evil.

She's a teacher, I thought nervously. It's not like she's going to hurt me.

"Think again shrimp boy." Nico said.

"Shrimp boy?" Percy asked.

"Why not, Thalia has kelp head, Annabeth has seaweed brain, I need something to work with,"

"Not shrimp boy."

"Too bad, you're stuck with it."

"Who's Annabeth?" Aphrodite asked, looking mischevious.

"Just a friend." Percy replied quickly.

"Are you sure, honey?"

"Very." Percy replied. Aphrodite pouted

"I'll-I'll try harder, ma'am."

Thalia got up and whacked Percy on the head.

"Idiot. You basically told her you were going to try harder to do what she was accusing you of. You just signed a death warrant."

"Well not if I survive."

"That's not the point; the point is you don't do that. It's like telling Poseidon I'll try harder in stealing his trident next time."

"You would dare steal my trident?!" Poseidon asked with a warning tone.

"What? No! I was just telling this idiot here what he was doing." Thalia defended.

Poseidon didn't say anything but kept his eye on Thalia.

Thunder shook the building.

"We are not fools, Percy Jackson, " Mrs. Dodds said. "It was only a matter of time before we found you out. Confess, and you will suffer less pain. "

"Wait, wait, wait, so if he doesn't confess he gets tortured, I get that. But if he does confess he still gets tortured but only slightly reduced?" Apollo asked.

Everybody nodded.

"Well she needs to work on her offers, obviously he won't confess, what's the difference? He still suffers."

"Thank you for that unneeded insight," Artemis said, her teeth clenched.

I didn't know what she was talking about.

"You rarely know what anybody's talking about." Thalia said.

"I know plenty of what everybody's talking about"

"I think Annabeth would beg to differ. You're like a lost puppy without her basically explaining everything she's talking about." Thalia said.

"I am not; tell her I'm not Nico!"

"Sorry Perce she's kinds right." Nico said.

"You all suck!'

"Thank you very much." Nico said before continuing.

All I could think of was that the teachers must've found the illegal stash of candy I'd been selling out of my dorm room.

"Nice! How much did you make?" Hermes asked.

"Eh, about 30 dollars." Percy replied

"Not bad, not bad, but you know you should like, have sold video games and answer sheets to tests and stuff, next time call me for ideas."

"Hermes I would appreciate it if you tried not to corrupt my son." Poseidon said.

Hermes pouted.

Or maybe they'd realized I got my essay on Tom Sawyer from the Internet without ever reading the book and now they were going to take away my grade. Or worse, they were going to make me read the book.

"Oh sure the worst thing that could happen is reading the book. Tom sawyer happens to be one of my favorites." Athena reprimanded.

"Well in case you forgot I have dyslexia so reading will most definitely be hard." Percy replied.

"Well my children also have dyslexia but they seem to do fine."

"That could be because they're freaking geniuses."

"Nonsense, if you tried you could do well."

"Whatever, Nico read."

"Well?" she demanded.

"Ma'am, I don't... "

"Your time is up," she hissed.

Nobody dared to say anything, the tension in the room was too much.

Then the weirdest thing happened. Her eyes began to glow like barbecue coals. Her fingers stretched, turning into talons. Her jacket melted into large, leathery wings. She wasn't human. She was a shriveled hag with bat wings and claws and a mouth full of yellow fangs, and she was about to slice me to ribbons.

The tension was so much you could cut through it. Then all hell broke loose.

"Hades! You sent a Fury after my son?! How dare you?! I will break every bone in your body and make you wish you were never born!" Poseidon yelled and lunged and Hades, who flashed on armor just to be safe.

Poseidon started to punch Hades repeatedly and the began to kick him and would have done more, had all the male gods not gotten to him first. Restraining Poseidon Zeus said, "Poseidon lets finish this chapter first and if anything happens to your son then you can continue." Poseidon calmed down.

Hades hoped that nothing happened.

Then things got even stranger.

"How come?" Hermes asked but got no answer, everybody was too caught up in the story to do answer.

Mr. Brunner, who'd been out in front of the museum a minute before, wheeled his chair into the doorway of the gallery, holding a pen in his hand.

"What's a pen gonna do?" Ares asked

"A hell of a lot of damage." Nico answered remembering the underworld.

"Oh really? What's I gonna do, write on it?" Ares asked snootily.

"You'd be surprised what it can do." Nico answered.

"What ho, Percy!" he shouted, and tossed the pen through the air.

"What ho? Who says that anymore?" Apollo asked snickering. However he got no answer since people were too caught up in the book

Mrs. Dodds lunged at me.

With a yelp, I dodged and felt talons slash the air next to my ear. I snatched the ballpoint pen out of the air, but when it hit my hand, it wasn't a pen anymore. It was a sword-Mr. Brunner's bronze sword, which he always used on tournament day.

"Oh so that's what the pen can do." Ares said and Nico smirked.

"Well at least he has a weapon now, he can defend himself." Demeter said trying to comfort her little brother.

"Yeah a weapon with no training, nothing." Poseidon moaned.

"Dad have a little faith, I can do this, I'm not a ghost here." Percy said.

Mrs. Dodds spun toward me with a murderous look in her eyes. My knees were jelly. My hands were shaking so bad I almost dropped the sword.

"Wimp" Ares said.

"oh yeah, I'm sure you would be much better when it's your first monster, no training and you also don't believe in this world, I'm sure you'd be Hercules wouldn't you?" Percy said sarcastically. Ares glowered.

She snarled, "Die, honey!

And she flew straight at me.

Absolute terror ran through my body. I did the only thing that came naturally: I swung the sword.

"Oh sure, that comes naturally, give a mortal a sword, I'm sure they'd do the same thing." Thalia said.

"Well it was natural to me."

The metal blade hit her shoulder and passed clean through her body as if she were made of water. Hisss!

"He killed it, he killed the fury, his first monster first try." Hades had his mouth open.

"The boy is powerful, I say we kill him!" Zeus said raising his bolt.

Poseidon gave him the most withering glare ever, so do did Hermes and Apollo, Surprisingly Artemis, Hephaestus, Aphrodite, Demeter and the demigods minus Percy. Zeus shrank into his seat and stuttered, " Or we uh…err praise him for killing the monster, yay!"

"Looks like you got quite some on your side." Thalia said. Percy grinned.

Mrs. Dodds was a sand castle in a power fan. She exploded into yellow powder, vaporized on the spot, leaving nothing but the smell of sulfur and a dying screech and a chill of evil in the air, as if those two glowing red eyes were still watching me.

"Well that's creepy, nice and warm way to describe it." Hermes said with sarcasm.

"Aww, it's over? Oh well, better get on." Ares complained.

I was alone.

"Well duh! No, there was a clown hiding in the back and he came out after you killed the fury to cheer you up." Thalia said totally pokerfaced.

There was a ballpoint pen in my hand.

Mr. Brunner wasn't there. Nobody was there but me.

My hands were still trembling. My lunch must've been contaminated with magic mushrooms or some-thing.

"Magic mushrooms, I wonder…" Hermes trailed off.

"READ! Don't give him Ideas! You do not want to give him ideas!" Apollo shouted telling Nico to read who happily obliged.

Had I imagined the whole thing?

"No! get that into your thick skull." Thalia said.

"Thalia this happened like 5 years ago, get over it." Percy said.

I went back outside. It had started to rain.

"Looks like Zeus ain't happy that you survived." Apollo said.

Poseidon looked at Zeus a warning evident in his eyes. "What? I wouldn't be angry over my nephew surviving?" Zeus said, trying to look innocent.

Grover was sitting by the fountain, a museum map tented over his head. Nancy Bobofit was still standing there, soaked from her swim in the fountain, grumbling to her ugly friends. When she saw me, she said, "I hope Mrs. Kerr whipped your butt."

"Who the what now?" Hermes asked.

"What?" Apollo asked.

"The mist." Athena reminded, "Honestly, how you even consider yourselves as gods, I don't know."

"Well we don't care of your opinion." Hermes said.

I said, "Who?"

"Our teacher. Duh!"

"Your teacher, duh!" Thalia said.

"Shut up Thalia, you don't want to let cats out of the bag?" Percy warned.

Thalia wisely shut up.

I blinked. We had no teacher named Mrs. Kerr. I asked Nancy what she was talking about.

She just rolled her eyes and turned away.

"I don't know why Zeus hasn't zapped her by now? Dad get a move on." Thalia said. Everybody started to snicker, Zeus turned red.

I asked Grover where Mrs. Dodds was.

He said, "Who?" But he paused first, and he wouldn't look at me, so I thought he was messing with me.

"Satyrs really are the worst liars. Once I left a few Pinochle cards in the care off a satyr, I came back with a glass of wi- diet coke and found my cards gone. I asked where they were, the satyr stuttered and said the nymphs took it and took off screaming." Dionysus explained.

"Hey Perce remind me to get the stolls to give Grover lying lessons." Thalia said.

"Will do." Percy replied.

"Not funny, man, " I told him. "This is serious. "

Thunder boomed overhead.

I saw Mr. Brunner sitting under his red umbrella, read-ing his book, as if he'd never moved.

"Maybe he didn't move, and there was just a ghost you saw and you were hallucinating from magic mushrooms." Apollo said.

"Really? Please if you have to interrupt make it worthwhile." Artemis said.

I went over to him.

He looked up, a little distracted. "Ah, that would be my pen. Please bring your own writing utensil in the future, Mr. Jackson. "

"Bet that confused him even further." Hermes said.

"What I don't get is who is this guy? How does he know so much? How does he know how to act?" Athena asked, but got no answer.

"Whoever he is, he's a good liar." Hermes said.

"of course you'd think of that." Artemis said.

I handed Mr. Brunner his pen. I hadn't even realized I was still holding it.

"Sir, " I said, "where's Mrs. Dodds?"

"Nowhere to be seen." Hermes said ominously.

"Shut up I'm nearly to the end." Nico said and started to read.

He stared at me blankly. "Who?" "The other chaperone. Mrs. Dodds. The pre-algebra teacher. "

Apollo was about to say something, but one look from Nico silenced him.

"Nobody speaks." Nico said

He frowned and sat forward, looking mildly concerned. "Percy, there is no Mrs. Dodds on this trip. As far as I know, there has never been a Mrs. Dodds at Yancy Academy. Are you feeling all right?"

"Well he really does know how to lie."

"Whoo that was a long chapter, my eyes hurt."

"I'll read next" Athena said.

Okay, sorry, sorry for the really long wait, I have excuses but rally poor ones, I am a procrastinator so you will have to deal with it. I hope you enjoy this long chapter, which got posted because of Mysticalxx constantly nagging me to write ahead. So if there's anybody to thank for this chapter it's her. Anyway I won't post all next week Exams:( anyway I will update, just not too soon. I hope you have enough patience with me. Any way bye chickitas.