157AN: Thank you for your support eveyone. Here's the next chapter.
Ch 16: A Necessary Risk
A month had passed since Harry had that dream. The dream which told him that he would die by his wife's wand. She would kill him and she would be sorry for that. But she would still do it.
Harry had initially felt a deep and profound sense of betrayal when his eyes snapped open and he was welcomed back to the real word. Bella was still asleep in his arms with a slow smile caressing her face. He was ashamed to admit that for a second, maybe not even that long, he had felt a deep revulsion for the women who called herself his wife. How could she do that to him? Was it all some sick joke Voldemort had played on him? Was he a toy to be discarded as soon one got bored with it?
He had wanted to throw her aside. Push her, hate her, hit her…
But that last thought had given him a pause.
Could he be so cruel to inflict such pain on her again? But what if it was all false? What if she hadn't changed? What if it was Bellatrix and not his Bella? What if his Bella never existed?
But what if she did. What if this wasn't a mistake? What if she really loved him?
Tears escaped his eyes as he thought of the time they had spent together. Their own world. Hiding from everyone who could disturb their peace, their calm. Their own little paradise.
Could he himself destroy it all with his own hands knowing very well that it could all be just a fucking dream? Hell, it could be something Voldemort sent him. Just like he did with Sirius.
He ran a hand through his hair as he felt his lungs constricting painfully. Deep breaths escaped him and his body shuddered as his brain tried to make out the difference between imagination and reality; lies and truth; hate and love; Bellatrix and Bella.
"Harry, what happened?" She had finally woken up. He looked down to see the worry visible in her eyes. They were honest eyes. It wasn't possible to fake that love, that emotion, that fear. Not for herself but for him, his safety.
She slid out of the sheets and hurriedly came back with a glass of water.
She made him sit up and helped him drink it.
When he finally came under control of himself, she had asked, "All right now, love? What happened? Bad dream?"
Harry had looked at her again. Seeing her eyes, he could not detect any betrayal. She loved him, plain and simple. Harry smiled. Once again, he decided to use his heart which had never failed him over his brain which was screaming to push her away. "Yeah. Nothing love. Only a dream."
Bella smiled and laid him back down. She too entered the covers and caressed his cheek. "What was it about?"
Harry pulled her tight against him. "Nothing. Don't worry. I love you, Bella. Good night."
Soon, she was asleep.
Harry looked at her sleeping form and removed a fringe of her hair from her eyes
Well, he'll see it all in a month. Whatever Death had said, he loved his Bella. And he wouldn't change that even for the Grim Reaper.
Soon, he was asleep as well.
~~~TTS~~~
Bella never noticed the change in Harry's behavior over the next month.
Because there was no change.
Harry still loved her. He still said 'I love you' in the mornings and in the evenings and in between. They still trained, studied, dueled, sometimes even fought over small things like what to eat but it was more like a play of who would break first and say 'sorry'.
~~~TTS~~~
Finally, the day came when Harry would get some of his answers.
He was sitting in the living room reading the autobiography of someone named Leonardo Black. The man was one of the most famous wizards in history for two reasons which were completely unrelated to his magic. One, he somehow possessed almost superhuman strength and two, he was blind. Leonardo had a brother named Alex and an uncle named Adrian. Adrian married him off to a pureblood girl with an almost inhuman beauty. The girl, Diana, respected the old traditions and accepted Leonardo as her husband for life. She went as far as to take an oath not to remove a blindfold on her eyes for her lifetime in respect of her man.
Leonardo was a grief-stricken man by that point. He cursed the deities for making him blind. Though he was eldest and Lord Black in name, Alex was the one who managed the estate and family. Diana gave him love and acceptance he was grieving for all his life. Thus, a tale of grief slowly became a love story.
Harry was smiling by the end of it when Bella came in from her basement cum research cum experimentation cum potions room. She devoted a total of two hours everyday in there and left Harry to his own devices for the time being. Harry sensed there was something wrong in her expression that day.
"What happened?" he asked.
"Bad news." she said and took a seat in front of him.
Harry waited for her to speak. "You remember that cup I took from Gringotts?" she asked after a while.
Harry scrunched up his face and thought back to that day. It seemed so long ago. "Yesss." he said slowly. "You said Tom gave it to you for safekeeping."
Bella nodded. "I know what it is now."
"What?"
"It's a Horcrux."
"What crux?"
"An object which is used to put a part of your soul inside it. One who does it cannot die until that object is destroyed. It is created by murdering an innocent in cold blood and performing a specific ritual. It's a way to cheat death."
Harry's eyes widened. "And Tom did this?"
Bella nodded with a grimace. "More than once. The diary you destroyed in your second year was one as well. I had this doubt since you told me that story. Nothing can create a soul like you described. It wasn't a memory. It was his soul piece."
"So, you are saying he made more that one of these things?"
"Yes."
Harry ran a hand through his hair cursing Tom Riddle to the depths of hell. His hand touched his scar and a sudden chill ran through him. And then he suddenly laughed. And laughed. And laughed.
Bella gaped at Harry's hysterical laughter and tried to think of something that would give him such optimism. She was still shivering at the thought of the line her old master had crossed to cheat death.
"What are you on about?" she finally asked, annoyed, when Harry refused to stop his laughter.
"I am- I am-" he wheezed, "I am a Horcrux."
She couldn't have come closer to a heart attack in a lifetime. She absolutely refused to believe what she possibly couldn't have heard. No. No. No. Harry couldn't be serious. No. No. No. She clutched at the arm pieces of the sofa. She tore the pillow covers. No. No. No. Harry was wrong. No. No.
"Are you insane?" she shrieked.
Harry finally stopped his hysterics and wiped away his tears. "No Bella." he said with a sad smile. "I am not insane and you know it."
Bella shook her head, refusing to acknowledge the truth. "I had always wondered Bella. What connects me and him? How can he send me dreams of such clarity and depravity? This doesn't happen to normal people. Why Dumbledore wants me to live in ignorance? This explains so very much. He wants me to die. Both of them want me to die."
Harry came next to her and sat on his knees, looking up at her with a loving smile. "Don't worry Bella. I won't die."
"How can you possibly say that?" she shouted, her features twisting into her old self.
"Come back, Bella. I am here. See"
A tear escaped her eyes. And one more. And then one more. She clutched his head in her hands and pulled him to her chest. "Oh Harry. Oh Harry."
Harry patted her back. "Shhh…don't cry Bells. No need to worry."
"We won't fight anymore. We will live here. Forever." she murmured.
Harry pulled back from her and looked in her eyes. "No. We will fight. And we will win."
"You don't understand-"
"I understand perfectly, Bells. Trust me on this. We will win." said Harry, wiping away her tears with his thumb.
"How?" she asked.
"Promise me that you won't be angry and do what I say."
Bella looked at him. "I won't let you die."
"I won't die. I never even had that weird dream of Death Sirius told me about. Remember? That proves I won't die." Harry knew he was lying to his wife on her face but it was necessary for what he wanted her to do. This was the first and last time he would lie to her, he promised himself.
"Okay. What?"
Harry took a deep breath. "You have to A.K. me."
"WHAT? ARE YOU COMPLETELY OFF YOUR ROCKER?"
"Bella-"
"One more word, Harry Potter and I will really strangle you."
"Listen to me."
"No, I won't ever use that blasted curse on you. Not even if-"
Harry stopped her rant by pushing his lips into hers. He kissed her as if it was the last time he would do it. He kissed her as if he could only breathe as far as that kiss went. He kissed her like the first time he had kissed her. He kissed her as if he was born only to kiss her. He gave all his love for her in that one kiss.
When he pulled apart, he caressed her cheeks. "Listen to me, my Bella. I am not leaving you. I won't die. Even if I do die, I will come back. That blasted prophecy that started all this mayhem also ensures my protection from anyone but him. He is the only one who could kill me and I won't give him a chance. Please Bella. Do this one thing for me."
She started crying again. "No. No. No-"
"Listen. Bellatrix once told me that I needed to hate in order to cast an unforgivable. That applies here as well. You cannot hate me. So, you cannot kill me. Hate Tom Riddle and kill this parasitic bastard in my head. Free me from him Bella. Only you can do this."
Bella's sobs only increased with each word he spoke. "O-Okay." she said in a pleading voice. "W-we w-will do i-it later. I-in a f-few months."
"No." said Harry. "Now."
"No. No. No. Harry, I can't do this-"
"You have to. If you love me, you have to."
Bella looked at him. "You doubt my love for you?"
"Yes. If you cannot even throw an A.K. at me to prove-"
"You are trying to manipulate me. You bastard." she screeched.
Harry laughed. "Yes. I am. Now, do it Bella please."
Bella shook her head. "I cannot live without you."
"Then don't."
"What?" she looked at him, surprised by his answer.
"If I die and don't come back, kill yourself too. It's as simple as that." he said with conviction. "I would do the same for you. And yes, ask Kreacher to put us in a grave together."
Bella looked at him as if she hadn't seen him before this day. "Really?"
"I love you. And I can't live without you. So I won't force you to do so either."
Bella finally nodded her head and stood up without one more word.
Harry too stood up and motioned for her to do the deed, smiling all the time.
Bella looked at him as her tears fell. She looked at his smile and conjured all the memories of their love in her mind. She looked at his scar and conjured all the hate for her old master she had. She loved Harry and she hated Voldemort. And she would kill herself if anything happened to him.
"I am sorry." she said to her husband, pointing her wand at his forehead, before uttering the foul words. "Avada Kedavra"
Harry dropped like a sack of wheat.
She ran towards him and took his head in her lap. She checked his pulse. There wasn't any.
Her hand dropped and dry sobs heaved her body. She had killed her husband. She had killed the man she loved. Morgana. But Harry had promised. She checked his pulse again. Nothing. She had killed him. Nothing was left. She shouldn't have done that. She hated herself. She should have stopped him.
Nothing was left.
She pointed her cursed wand at her heart. She would have to meet him in afterlife. "Avada Kedav-"
And the wand fell from her hand.
"Oy! Why didn't you wait for me? I said I would come, didn't I?"
And she kissed him.
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