Mercenary For the Money: Chapter 4
By: Vulcan Rider

Disclaimer: The characters you recognize are the property of Janet Evanovich. Just using them for my amusement.

Awakenings

It had been two weeks since his meeting with Special Agent in Charge Mitchell Anderson, his supervisor on his first FBI task force. Joe Morelli was still going to work every day, performing his job to the best of his abilities. But, in the back of his mind, the facts were eating away at him. He had always taken pride in his work ethic and the fact that he'd earned his Detective shield and undercover assignments with the FBI on his own merit. Learning that his way was paved by Ranger Manoso sat like a lead ball in his stomach. All because of a nosy neighbor hitting him over the head and knocking him out, causing the accomplice to get away, leaving him to be charged with murder of an unarmed man. It wasn't right that his career would have been flushed, even though he was exonerated and solved the case himself... well, with Steph's help. He was still trying to accept that he had Ranger to thank for his dream job of working with the FBI.

"Fuck" Joe muttered to himself. "I've gotta find a way to deal with this or I'm going to be useless."

Realizing that he was talking to himself, he shut down his computer and left his office, locking the door behind himself. He'd been sitting there half the day, thinking about what his mother had told him, remembering words she'd said his Dad had used on her before he started using his fists and remembering those same words being wielded against his Cupcake from his own mouth. No, not his Cupcake. Stephanie. She was no longer his. He headed out of the station for home, knowing he was looking at another night with just Bob for company.

As he was headed out the door, he saw Stephanie walking to her car. He jogged up to her and winced at the hesitant look on her face.

"Hey, Steph! Got a moment? I won't keep you long; I just want to talk to you a minute," Joe said.

"Sure, Joe. What's up?" Steph watched him as he looked down at his shoes and hesitated.

Joe struggled to make the words actually cross his lips, but after his talk with his mother, he knew it was the right thing to do. "I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, and I realized I owed you an apology. Several, actually."

Steph looked at him in shock. It wasn't like Joe to apologize. Ever. She was curious what he was apologizing for.

Joe continued, "I had a talk with my mother a while back and she mentioned some things that made me look at our relationship differently. I got to thinking about all the times something would happen to one of your cars and how I reacted, and I wanted to apologize for always blaming you. I never gave you credit for always getting your guy. I should have handled it better when things would go wrong, but I didn't realize at the time that I was repeating things I'd heard all my life." Joe shook his head. This was harder than he thought.

"Steph, all the times I called you incompetent and an embarrassment... I'm ashamed of how I always cut you down because of how I thought it made me look. It seems I got more from my Dad than I realized, growing up. I hate that I treated you like that and after talking to my mom, well, she made me realize that writing about you before I left for the Navy wasn't just a young, stupid thing to do. It was damaging to you and I didn't think about how it was going to affect you. She really tore me a new one about that," Joe smiled wryly.

"Joe," Steph looked up at him, "why now? I don't understand."

"Hell, Cupcake, I don't know. Maybe I'm just now growing up. It sucks to reach my age and realize that I'm still that kid that cowered from my Dad's fists and words, and I don't want to make the same mistakes he made. I guess I realized that I never really apologized for what I caused you to go through. I figured breaking my leg was enough and we were even. It wasn't until my mom told me how much she wanted to go to you and protect you from all the fallout after I left that I realized just how bad it was. I fucked up. I'm really sorry for writing about what happened between us; I never meant for it to ruin your reputation or cause you to lose an entire summer. And I'm really pissed about all the guys that thought you were easy after that. Shit." He looked back down at his shoes like he couldn't face her.

Steph put her hand on his arm and drew his eyes back to her face. "Joe, I accept your apology and I really appreciate it. You know, I thought I hated you for a long time after that, but truthfully, I think I was just hurt because you didn't really like me the way I liked you at the time." She shook her head, thinking back on the past. "Joe, it wasn't all bad between us. You're a good guy. We had a lot of good times together. I think that we both had expectations for our lives and they just didn't match up. We wouldn't have been happy together. I mean, can you actually see me wearing an apron, serving dinner at six o'clock every night?" She snickered. "Yeah, I don't think so."

Joe had to laugh. The sunny, smart-ass part of Steph that made her who she was always made him smile. "No, I can't see that. Your mother would probably faint if that ever happened. But, you know, Steph... I think you can do anything you set your mind to. It's why you're still doing this crazy job." He shook his head again, still smiling.

"Cupcake... shit, sorry. Steph, I really am sorry for everything and I hope that one day you can actually forgive me and we can maybe be friends. I mean, I don't see us having Pino's together with Manoso sitting across from us, but I am trying to not be my father and maybe this is just the first step. I realize that I said some awful things to you that didn't help your self-esteem, and for that I'm sorry, too. Damn, I had to hear from a guy I worked with a while back that you've got the best capture rate in the country. Yeah, you might just go after the lower end bonds, but those people are crazy!" He chuckled, "I mean, could you see one of Rangeman's skips greasing themselves up with vaseline and mooning him out of the window?"

Steph broke out in laughter. "Thanks, Joe. Really! This means a lot to me. I know that it's not easy admitting all this, but geez, if you can do it, so can I. I'm sorry for being such a pain in the ass when we were together. I know I didn't make things easy for you, either. I guess we're both products of our childhood. I mean, look at me. I'm still trying to rebel against my mother and prove to her that I don't have to be a stay-at-home 'Burg wife and mother to actually be happy." She paused a long moment then looked Joe in the eyes. "Joe, I really do just want you to be happy, too. I don't think we would have been happy together, but I want you to find that person who makes it worth getting up in the morning and doing the kind of work you do. Find the woman who wants the things you do and is willing to compromise with you, not just fold under your wishes. A real partner in life that will make you happy down to your soul. You deserve that, Joe." She smiled at him as she opened her car door. "And, Joe?"

"Yeah, Steph?"

"When you find her...appreciate all the differences about her, not just what you have in common. The right woman will make the most annoying things seem endearing." God knows why Ranger loves the weirdest things about me, she muttered out loud.

Joe burst out in laughter. Yeah. That made perfect sense. He waved to her as she started her car and drove off. He was still standing there two minutes later thinking about what she said. She was one in a million and his mother was right. He felt so much better about himself, his past with Steph and his future. As he walked to his truck, he had a smile on his face for the first time in months. Hell, maybe he was finally growing up.

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Stephanie pulled into the underground garage at Rangeman with a little smile on her face, still shaking her head. Sometimes it was amazing how things turned out. She would have never in her life expected Joe Morelli to apologize for the things he'd said and done in the past, much less, mean them so sincerely. Life was full of surprises.

As she stepped out on the fifth floor and walked to Ranger's office, the guys still remaining in the control room called out greetings to her. She stopped to say hi to a couple of them before knocking on Ranger's door and sticking her head in.

"Hey, Babe. Ready to call it a day?" Ranger asked as he began shutting down his computer and putting away files.

"Yeah. I just ran into Joe at the station. It was the strangest conversation we've ever had; strange, but nice."

Ranger looked up at her with his blank face, concerned about her. "What did he have to say this time?"

Steph hopped up on the desk and Ranger leaned forward and gave her a welcome kiss. "He apologized to me."

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "For?"

Steph had a puzzled look on her face. "He said he'd had a talk with his mother a while back and realized just how bad the things he used to say to me actually were. He said something about still being the kid who cowered from his Dad, and that he ended up being just like him. He also apologized for writing about the Tasty Pastry thing around town. He said his mother had wanted to protect me at the time, but couldn't." She shook her head, still wondering about this new side of Joe.

"It's the first time he's ever apologized to me about that and sincerely meant it. We had a good talk. I think he realizes now that we were never really meant to be together. I told him that I wanted him to be happy; I wanted him to find the woman that wanted the same things he did in life, and when he found her, that he should appreciate everything about her. I think it's the first time that he actually listened to me and actually heard what I was saying. I don't know, it's like he's had some kind of epiphany or something, but he said that maybe he's just finally growing up." Steph looked up into Ranger's eyes, the eyes that always seemed to look inside of her and know just what she needed.

"Anyway, it was nice to hear him finally apologize and really mean it. It makes me sad to think that my mother can't realize the same things, even if it did take Joe forever. I just feel like a lot of old hurts and resentment finally lifted and it makes me all the more grateful for you. You have always been in my corner, there when I needed you and supporting me even when I felt like I wasn't any good at this job. You'll never know just how much that means to me. I love you, Ranger, and I'm so glad that you are in my life. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me." Steph looked straight at Ranger as she said these words. She wasn't raised to talk about feelings, but this was important and she wanted Ranger to know what he meant to her.

"Babe, you're the best thing in my life, too. When you've lived in the dark as long as I have, you learn to appreciate the light; and you are the one who brought light back into my life." He kissed her again, then stood up and lifted her from the desk. "What do you say we go see what Ella has for dinner and have an early night?"

"That sounds great. Oh, and what do you say about loaning me Lester for tomorrow?" Steph asked with a sly grin. "I have Punky Balog on the schedule for a pickup tomorrow," Steph commented, then busted out laughing. Lester was so going to regret the comment he made last week about a "lube job" when he was covered in vaseline tomorrow.

"Babe."

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A/N: I decided to end this here. I couldn't see Joe actually thanking Ranger for boosting his career. I just couldn't get the words to come. They both know what he did, and I think it would make future relations between Morelli and Rangeman more diplomatic, but Ranger doesn't expect thanks and it would probably kill Joe to actually have to acknowledge it.

I would like to thank everyone for the wonderful reviews. For those who signed in as guests or not logged on, I appreciate you taking the time to leave your thoughts on the chapter and story. It is truly appreciated.
Also, I haven't spoken to Margaret in quite a while, but she was the one who pushed me to expand this from a one-shot. Thank you. And thank you to Yvonne for always keeping me sane when I'm wigging out. :-) Love and hugs to you, my friend.
Maggie M.