MY STRANGE ADDICTION: TOTAL DRAMA STYLE
A/N: Okay, so I was watching 'My Strange Addiction' and I got this whacky idea to write a Total Drama fanfic based on it. I think its a cool idea so far, and I really want to see where I go with this... But just beware that some of the characters might be OOC, so I'm really sorry if they are. Also, I don't own anything.
CHAPTER 1: Lindsay
It was a plain, ordinary day in Toronto. The sky had no hints of grey, there wasn't much traffic on the streets, and everyone seemed at peace. But with the sudden arrival of a specific host, many lives were about to change for the worst... Twenty-four lives, specifically.
Right outside of a quiet, rich neighbourhood stood Chris McLean. He was wearing his casual attire and had the most devious smile planted on his face. It was almost as though he was planning something horrific.
"What's up, everyone? I'm your host, Chris McLean, and today we're here to introduce a new show like no other."
He then walked up to the camera in order to get a better shot of his features. "As it turns out, ratings aren't as good as they used to be, so the producers thought that we should start a new show related to Total Drama... and its going to be better than ever before! We're basically going to invade the contestant's houses as they tell us all about their deranged addictions and how it has effected their personal lives... Trust me, if you already thought that the Total Drama contestants were crazy, then think again!"
Turning his back to the camera, Chris approached possibly the biggest house on the street and rang the doorbell. The whole neighbourhood was obviously rich, telling from the size of each house, but Chris couldn't really complain. After all, they didn't look as half as good as his 'cottage' back at Camp Wawanakwa.
After ringing the doorbell three more times, Chris was starting to grow even more impatient. As the cameraman continued to film him waiting outside the house, Chris suddenly remembered that he forgot to add something.
"Oh yeah, the first contestant we're interviewing is none like any other. Sure, she's not the sharpest tool in the shed- after all, who forgets their boyfriend's name?... But since that problem is long gone, we've found a new way to humiliate her even more!- Can she hurry up already?!..."
Chris was relieved as the door to the large house finally opened. As it opened, the camera revealed that this house belonged to Lindsay and her family. She was wearing a white tank top and pink miniskirt, and had the biggest smile on her face as she realised who was at the door.
"Oh, hi Chip!"
"It's Chris..." he said, looking awkwardly at the camera.
"Oh, right! Chris... Chris McDoofle?"
Chris' eyebrows started to furrow, but made sure not to lose his cool in front of the camera.
"Chris McLean, Lindsay! Chris McLean!"
"Oh right!" Lindsay giggled, "Chris McLean!"
"So... Are you going to invite us inside?" Chris hinted, pointing at the camera. Lindsay, however, seemed confused by his actions.
"... Should I?..."
"Yeah... you should. But before you do so, I think you should introduce yourself to the camera. That way, the audience can know who you are."
Lindsay smiled once again and flicked her hair back in order to look perfect. It seemed like she was born to be on television.
"Hello to everyone who is watching this. My name is Lindsay, and... uh... I forgot my line..."
"Come on, we practiced this," Chris said, looking at his wristwatch.
"I know we did, but... I forgot."
"'And I have a strange addiction', okay, Lindsay?! 'I HAVE A STRANGE ADDICTION'!"
Lindsay dusted herself off and started again. "My name is Lindsay and I have a strange prediction!"
"Uh, oops... I meant addiction."
Chris looked wide-eyed at the camera. "Yeeeah. This is going to take a while... Commercial break?"
After what involved a lot of moving and countless instructions, the camera finally viewed Lindsay and Chris sitting down on the couch in the living room.
"Okay, Lindsay, so this is how the show works... You're going to tell everyone one – or some - of your sickest addictions and its my job to help you get over them- and possibly laugh at you... After I try out some methods to help you, you have to tell the viewers afterwards if you are over your addiction or not."
"All right, but does my hair look okay?"
"Lindsay! Did you listen to anything I said just then?!"
Lindsay playfully rolled her eyes. "Of course I did, Kyle."
"Uh, it's Chris... Now Lindsay, please tell the viewers your secret addiction."
Lindsay adjusted her bandanna before looking at the camera.
"I guess I like to collect things... Yeah, I have a terrible obsession for collecting things."
"Girly things. You know, bikinis and lipgloss especially!"
"It doesn't seem that bad. Well, I don't know how I'm supposed to help you, but my assistant texted me before and said that I had to show you this heartfelt video. So yeah... here's a video that's supposed to make you feel ashamed of your addiction."
Suddenly, Chris opened his laptop and set it on the coffee table in front of them. He clicked on a folder which then led to a video. A blonde female, looking only a few years younger than Lindsay, appeared on the screen with a worried look on her face.
"Hi Lindsay, it's your sister, Paula! That Chris McLean guy told me to tell you how I really feel about your obsession... So I think you should stop collecting bikinis. You have so much that you've even started to crowd my own closet, and we don't even live in the same room! I'm very worried about you, and your need for collecting things needs to come to an end. I mean, you're my older sister and I'm supposed to be looking up to you... Oh, and I also found your cherry lipgloss in the kitchen sink the other day. Seriously, Lindsay, you need to stop collecting things. Please, do this for me... And on a side note, I can't believe you told everyone on national tv that I had diarrhoea on my date... It was sooo embarrassing!"
As the heartfelt video came to an end, Chris shut the laptop and looked at Lindsay who seemed to be speechless at this point. Could it be that Paula's words finally got to her?
"So, how did your sister make you feel? Do you feel like ending your addiction now?"
"I don't understand. How did my sister get on your laptop? Was she also on tv? Also, what was she talking about? I'm so confused..."
"Okay, apparently that video meant nothing to you... So, can you tell us how you first got addicted to collecting bikinis?"
"I've always loved swimsuits. My favourite one is the sparkly-purple bikini. Actually, follow me and I'll show you!" Lindsay said as she dragged Chris to her room.
Once they were inside Lindsay's room, Chris couldn't really say much. It looked like the normal room of any teenage girl. However, Chris' opinion immediately changed once Lindsay opened her closet. There were bikinis everywhere. In fact, this was a whole closet dedicated to bikinis and other beach-related items. There was also another wardrobe in the corner of the room, so Chris guessed that's where the rest of her ordinary clothes were.
"Okay, you can't get more strange than that," Chris said.
"What do you mean? Aren't they pretty?" Lindsay asked, shoving a pink bikini top at Chris' face.
"Yeeeah, that's nice and all, but I'm kinda on a tight schedule here..."
"Okay, well I guess I should start by saying that whenever I talk to my bikinis, I feel like they understand me. And it makes my day that they-"
"Wait," Chris interrupted. "Are you saying that you talk to your clothes?"
"Of course not!" Lindsay giggled. "I only talk to my bikinis. They're so adorable! I have one for every month of the calendar, and even some in animal prints."
Chris placed a hand at the back of his neck. "As adorable as that sounds, that's kinda messed up... Didn't you say you also had a lipgloss collection?"
"Oh yeah!" Lindsay said, walking over to her bedside table. As she opened the drawer, the inside was revealed to be completely full of lipgloss. "I bought these especially for the next season! Sometimes I feel like eating them, but I'm scared I'll hurt their feelings... Wait, do they have feelings?"
All Chris could do was pat Lindsay's shoulder in pity. "No Lindsay, your season's supply of lipgloss do not have feelings... Does Tyler know about these addictions?"
"Tyler?... Who's Tyler?"
"... OH! Dave! Yes, he already knows and he said he still loves me!"
"Then you're both crazy people who deserve each other... Anyway, instead of me helping you, why don't you help those who are less fortunate by donating some of your belongings to them?"
Lindsay put a finger on her lips, obviously thinking about the idea. She suddenly looked terrified when she came to her decision.
"Now that I think about it, those poor girls are always wearing the same one-piece swimsuits at the beach. Maybe I should send them some of my bikinis and a tube of lipgloss... I really think this is going to help everyone!"
"Yeah, because that's going to solve the world's major problems," Chris muttered.
"But I don't know which bikinis to pick- they're all soooo cute! Can you help me choose?"
Looking over his shoulder, Chris spotted Lindsay taking a whole rack of bikinis out of the closet and laying them down on her bed. As his sight took hold of all of the bikinis, Chris was starting to have second thoughts...
"Y'know, maybe you're better off keeping the bikinis... And when the camera stops filming, maybe you can model each swimsuit for me?..."
"... All righ-"
"Well, I'd love to chat some more, but it's time for you to go outside and tell the camera man if you're over your addiction and if I've actually helped you or not!- Whaaaat?..." Chris asked, looking at the suspicious cameraman, "We actually are running out of time."
It didn't really take long for Chris, Lindsay and the rest of the crew to settle outside. Once the cameras were filming again, Chris ordered Lindsay to talk about her experience with the new reality show and how it was going to effect the rest of her life. However, it took Lindsay several poses and fifty different pouts before she was ready to speak.
"At first I wanted to help all those girls with the one-piece swimsuits, but its so hard to pick some to actually send... But I might send one, and one is good because good things come in small houses-"
"Packages!" Chris shouted from the background.
"Right, good things come in small packages! But I still want to help those girls who put those cheap tubes of lipgloss on their lips, so I will be sending them some of my own. The only problem is that I don't know their addresses..."
"That's great, Lindsay. Is there anything else you'd like to add?" Chris asked, half-heartedly.
"Yes," Lindsay smiled. "All of this talk about bikinis has reminded me that I need to buy a new one this weeken- Oh! But I'm trying to get rid of my addiction... I guess you didn't really help me at all, Chip. Sorry!"
"Well, that was a complete waste of time," Chris said, now standing in front of the camera and shoving Lindsay out of the spotlight. "Anyway, that comes to the end of the first episode. So tell me, viewers... Who would you like to see reveal their secret addiction next? Make sure to vote and you'll find out next time on My Strange Addiction: Total Drama Style!"
A/N: I thought Lindsay would be a good start for this fic. Now all you need to do is review and vote for the next person if you want to see another chapter... You can vote for whoever you want, but I'm only accepting the first generation cast since I've never watched TDROTI. I also didn't know if Paula was older or younger than Lindsay, but I decided to go with the latter. But yeah, I hope you enjoyed this.