Tobi grew up in a small Fire Nation town, far away from the capital, and even further away from the colonies, his father had moved there after his mother passed away in childbirth. Before Tobi's father died tragically... In an accident, he thought him all he knew about firebending. As it turned out he was an unprecedented genius, or so he thought.
Tobi was a good boy, he was! Whenever someone looked cold, he'd set them on fire just to warm them up a little and whenever someone was angry, he'd set them on fire in an effort to melt their frozen hearts. Even when people were mean to him he would simply extend the flames of friendship – And set them on fire. Because Tobi wasn't mean, not in any sense of the word. Tobi was a good boy and that's the way he liked it.

In a small town where most buildings were still made of wood and had thatched roofs – Something very rare in the Fire Nation, all bending practice had to happened far from the village. Everyone had to be very careful when cooking or in any other way dealing with fire, so it came as a shock when the entire village was burned to the ground.
Popular theory was that a young child must have set the school on fire by accident. Mrs. Aki suspected Tobi, because he had threatened to set the school on fire if she failed him in Fire Nation History – But that was a joke. It wasn't as if he had any intention of actually doing it. And if the school had accidentally caught fire when he practiced his "Fire Flying", a technique he had invented himself (or so he thought) - Then nobody could prove it. But that wasn't what happened, because Tobi had set all the witnesses on fire, not unlike a good boy. Or at least a boy who didn't get caught.

The survivors were temporarily re-located to the Capital curtsey of the Fire Lord, but Tobi was pretty sure Ozai did it as a publicity stunt since he had lost quite some popularity among the people when he banished his firstborn son.
Either way Tobi wasn't above taking advantage of the situation, he figured that maybe he could steal something from the palace. It wasn't like they would notice if anything went missing, and even if they did, who would suspect poor homeless orphan Tobi? It was indeed a flawless plan. If he just kept stealing a little at a time, he could probably get a place on his own, pay his own way in life without having to join the army or get a real job.
Being in the army or working would have been too restricting for Tobi anyway, he wanted to live life! Travel the world and see new things, set new things on fire. Meet new interesting people, and set those interesting people on fire in new interesting ways. Just like any regular kid would.

It wasn't like he had a lot to loose anyway, most people from his old village didn't like him very much. Tobi didn't quite understand why. Sure, he'd set a few of them on fire on occasion – But it was all in good fun, and really, Tobi always had everyone's best interests at heart. Besides, who didn't like being set on fire? Especially if it's only a little bit once in a while.
Gazing into the fireplace in his temporarily abode, Tobi couldn't help but marvel at it's beauty. Fire was so easy, so rewarding and warm,... warm like a mothers hug, or at least how Tobi would imagine a mothers hug would feel like.

Throwing a few rocks into the fire his thoughts drifted to plans of conquest... Maybe he should head to the palace now – Just to see if there was anything up grabs there.

Never being one to question his own decision Tobi set off at a speed equal to walking, because that is what he did. No need to tire himself out after all, especially incase he would need his energy later. Maybe he'd be forced to make a daring escape or something.
With his head filled with escape plans, one more unlikely than the next Tobi arrived at his destination. He knew he had to be careful to avoid being caught. The most important thing was not doing anything stupid. Discretion was key, but like Tobi always said – with great power, you can set things on fire, and Tobi was pretty sure the same principle could be applied to people.

It didn't take long to come up with a plan for Tobi, he was a genius after all – Being the guy who figured out that frying pans could be used as drying pans when it rained and the person who had an IQ of over 200 by his own estimation.

After careful consideration he decided the best course of action was walking in straight through main gate and pretend he belonged there. As it turned out the plan had a minor flaw somewhere, a flaw must have overlooked in his haste to commit the perfect crime because he was soon chased by both guards and employees. Why that was, he didn't know but he thought it might have had something to do with him setting a very expensive rug on fire, or because there were people on it. All he knew was that it could have happened to anyone.

Some quick thinking led him to open the nearest door and locking it after him. Nobody would suspect him being behind a locked door after all, and he would have been quite safe had the room not already been occupied.

Authors note:

First off, this isn't a Naruto crossover. I've taken the name and some of Tobi's unique style, but no or next to no elements of other stories was ever ment to exist in this one. At least as far as the verse goes.

I wrote this years ago and found it somewhat entertaining. I hope you do too.

I'm not sure where I was going with this so I doubt I'll continue it.

I have a lot of these story-beginnings, so what I'd like to know is whether or not it's worth posting them. This was special since it's pretty much pure comedy, so I figured it'd at least give someone a laugh but the others?

They are each different from the next, but most of them are Harry Potter fics, crossovers and what I think is a few Naruto fics. Most of them are short, this especially, so as I said, I'm unsure where to go from here.

Maybe I'll write something entirely new, but who knows.

Either way, I'd like to hear other peoples opinion on the matter.

Oh, and kudos to anyone who gets all the references. I might have added some right now as I checked over the spelling (hard with a broken spellchecker) but well... It's up to you to find them.

Oh yeah, if I start writing I'll need a beta reader. Never had one of those but I've heard good things about them. If you are interested just PM me.