A/N- Kili is 62, the equivalent of 14 in human years, so Fili is 67, approximately 16.
Chapter 1: Negotiations
Usually I just pull the covers farther over my head when daylight comes through our window. I'm always, "Just one more minute." Today I am up and dressed before my brother's feet hit the floor.
I know what Uncle Thorin has planned...and it doesn't include me, well not yet. He and Fili will leave shortly after sunrise, a time I rarely see, to deliver a load of weapons from the forge to a nearby village. Uncle hopes they will place another order, so supposedly this trip is to teach Fili about trade negotiations; after all, that will be important if...when Fili is king.
Uncle's already said I can't go because they don't need an extra dwarf tagging along. That's Thorin's code for, "You're too wild and reckless, Fili doesn't need to be distracted looking out for you, and I don't have the time...or the patience." My uncle may be a dwarf of few words, but he puts a lot of meaning in what he says.
I am not deterred. I have a plan.
" 'Morning, Kee?" my brother smiles at me questioningly.
"Yes, Fee, it is," I chirp back grinning.
Fili stops pulling on his trousers to pin me with an icy blue stare. "Kili, what's going on?"
"Nothing," I reply, my hands splayed out open before him and trying to keep a straight face. Unfortunately, he can read me better than one of Balin's scrolls. I don't want Thorin mad at Fili thinking he is in on my plan.
"Really?" Fili continues dressing. "Up at first light and nothing's going on? Kili, you know uncle said you couldn't come. It's not a long trip. We'll be back by mid-afternoon. Please don't make a scene."
"But Fee, it's not fair. I want to go, too." Oh, that came out wrong, too whiney.
Ignoring me, Fili sits back on his bed to redo his braids.
"Here, let me do that," I offer crossing the few steps to sit behind him and take up his hair. At least this gives me something else to do while I make my case. Besides I'm much better at braiding than he is.
"Don't I need to learn about negotiations, too?" I ask innocently while my fingers work through his hair.
My brother just sighs. He's not going to let me pull him into this argument. Good, this way it will be just Thorin and me.
I drop the finished braids tapping him on the shoulder. "There, now, you look every bit the dwarf prince ready for trade negotiations," I proclaim. Jumping up, I head for the door.
Mum and Uncle Thorin are already at the table. There's a place set for Fili. Of course my spot is empty. They didn't think I'd even be up yet. Mum starts to rise, but I put a hand on her shoulder. "No trouble, I'll get it."
I return to the table and help myself to bread and cheese.
Just as I take my first bite, Thorin turns to me his face solemn. "Kili, I said, 'NO'!"
"But...I..." I turn the weight of my big dark brown eyes on him, pleading. It's a look I've perfected over the years: those poor, innocent, little puppy dog eyes; and it's broken many, even Mr. Dwalin. It usually works on my uncle, too, but not today.
"Enough!" Thorin yells turning away, his hair flipping around. "Do not speak again."
I swallow hard biting back my disappointment. I had been so sure it would work. I stare at the bread and cheese before me, realizing that I have no more interest in food.
Quietly I rise and return to our room. I try to not be so disappointed. After all, it is market day and I'll go with Mum. It's just back to that old feeling in my gut that I'm not good enough for Thorin. He'll never be as proud of me as he is of Fili, his golden prince, his heir.
I stand with my back to the door, head bowed, eyes closed, as I try to quiet that gnawing pain of rejection. I should be used to it by now. At least I don't have tears in my eyes, yet. Yeah, that's another problem; dwarves aren't supposed to cry. We're strong and tough, like the stone we were made from. Yet my emotions roil too close to the surface, always have. I cry from frustration, from anger, from fear. It's just another sign of my weakness and inadequacy. It's no wonder Uncle is ashamed of me.
I whip around when I hear the door snick open.
"Kee?" Fili calls tentatively. "I'm sorry."
" 's not your fault," I manage. I just want him to leave, not rub my nose in another failure.
"We'll do something this afternoon when I get back," he promises.
I say nothing in response, gaze turned again to the floor, my dark hair hanging down to hide my face.
Fili crosses to stand in front of me. He puts his hands on my shoulders. "OK?" I guess he wants an answer. Thankfully, he doesn't make me look up at him.
" 'K" I mutter.
"Good then." He pulls me into a hug that I return only half-heartedly. Then he's gone and I hear the front door close.
I stand for a few more minutes wondering just what it will take for me to please my uncle, for him to be proud of me just once. I've been thinking about this for nearly sixty years, and I'm still not any closer to the answer.
"Oh well," I sigh. "Time to put on my 'Kili's always happy' face."
A/N- The first few chapters setting up the story will be shorter with longer chapters to follow. I expect 10-11 chapters with updates 2x/week. Reviews greatly appreciated and they fuel the writing/editing process.