10Disclaimer: Don't own Hetalia, and probably never will ;A; Also I don't own Lazy Town, or Yo Gabba Gabba, or Haypi Kingdom, or Starbucks, or BBC (ugh was it really necessary to add the last five? might as well say I don't own the English language while I'm at it. Which I also don't own, by the way. Who even owns languages? maybe the people who speak the language...but then I would own English, as well as like a trillion other people? Or maybe the dictionary owns the English language. well, whoever owns it, let's not get too into it because this disclaimer has dragged on enough already)
When it had happened, Iceland was lying down on his bed lazily, eating a huge pile of candy while half watching Lazy Town (don't judge him—it's a good kids' show! And Icelandic too), and half playing Haypi Kingdom on his phone. It was one of those languorous days where all Iceland felt like doing was sitting back on his ass and not moving for the rest of the day. Iceland had gone through the whole day so far like this, and it was pure and utter bliss not having to worry about anything or do anything or think about anything. All he needed to do was relax.
Lazy Town had just ended, and Yo Gabba Gabba had come on, and Iceland fucking hated that show, so he grabbed the remote with his sticky hands and changed it to the news. That's when the news came, and that's when Iceland saw the headline:
'PERSONIFICATION OF NATION ALLEGEDLY DEAD?'
He chewed on another piece of licorice incredulously. A country—dead? That was impossible! Or, did one nation simply collapse? What huge wars had been going on to have that happen?
But, when Iceland caught a glimpse of the face of said personification, his heart nearly stopped.
When it had happened, England was at America's house, discussing political relations.
However, the American was restless (most likely being hyped up on too much Starbucks) and kept going off the subject in a much too loud voice, bouncing around his whole living room.
He just wanted to leave this goddamn house. He was not in the mood for this.
But they hadn't gotten anything done yet.
Naturally, this pissed the Brit off. Very much so. And even worse than usual, since he was in such a godawful mood
"OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU ARSEHOLE CAN YOU JUST SHUT UP FOR A BLOODY SECOND THIS IS NOT WHAT WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING UGHHH—"
"Hahahaha! Looks like you need a serious break, England!"
"Okay, we'll have a break. But right after it you better fucKING FOCUS ON POLITICS AND NOTHING ELSE, YOU HEAR"
"Okay, okay, Jesus! Who's voice is too loud now..."
England simply sighed, and took out his phone. He made to call his boss to ask for a possible postponing of this meeting with America, when his BBC app dinged and a notification for some news or whatever came up. England was just about to swipe the notification away when he realized what it said.
'Personification of nation allegedly dead?'
What in hell...?
Hurriedly, he tapped on the app and immediately started reading the article.
As he was reading, his eyes bugged out in shock, and once he saw the picture, he quickly ran to America's nearest bathroom to retch.
When it had happened, China was asleep.
He was feeling alone earlier that day. Macau and Hong Kong had both moved out much earlier. He'd gotten over it, of course, but for some reason today he couldn't stand the eeriness of the empty house, the only sound being the noises he and Panda made.
China soon woke up, however, to his phone ringing continuously. Still half asleep and grumbling, he rubbed as much of the dried rheum as he could out of his eyes and picked up the phone without bothering to glance at the caller ID. "Wèi,"
Someone was talking really fast and really incomprehensibly on the other end. China recognized the voice. "Taiwan, aru? Why did you call me at three in the morning?!"
Taiwan was blubbering as she talked, but soon she cleared her words enough for China to understand.
"What? Who's dead, aru? Taiwan! Have you been seeing a human? You know that as nati— Oh. Well, sorry, aru. Wait, what?! Oh, stop joking with me, aru. Your teacher's not that dumb. In fact, I'm not dumb at all, aru! Taiwan. Taiwan, aru, it's bad to lie. Taiwan—are you actually serious? No, that's impossible, aru. He can't die...oh, wǒ de tiān na TAIWAN I AM COMING OVER YOU BETTER NOT BE LYING ARU"
China was breathing hard as he climbed out of bed, the sleep gone from his eyes. He couldn't have actually been dead, could he?
Some nations had later confirmed that the wails of these three nations had been heard around the world, from Canada to Thailand to anywhere else. These claims were declared without proof, however, so we kinda doubt it's true. But, if a nation can allegedly die, anything can happen, correct?
Quite correct.
[A/N]: wèi - 'hello' in Chinese pinyin
wǒ de tiān na - 'oh my God' in Chinese pinyin
fun fact: i was obsessed with haypi kingdom for a good while
also eeriness is a weird looking word
also did you realize that they are all using their phones in each thing wow
Anyway, so I know this was kinda short, but this was more of a prologue of sorts. well, not really, I guess, because you're gonna need to read it to understand the next chapter? I dunno
The action won't start until later, but I must warn you: This is a crack fic, so the characters might be OOC and some p weird things will happen. also there will be gore and a shit ton of cursing. not to mention bad humor. I hope y'all are ready for this, because I am!
Review?
~giraffe