blugh i'm just going to type DAVE [ENTER] and JADE [ENTER] later i wanted to get to this chapter fastest i could i was so exited. This is the most well developed story i've ever made.


The four friends stand close next to each other as they are herded to a tacky-ass green auditorium among many strange faces. There are grey people with horns, a man who looks like a featureless version of the jack-in-the-box guy wearing all green, and grayscale students wrapped almost completely in cloth. Its obvious that the American group sticks out the most. They remain silent out of fear of the men that herded them there. They appear to be painted green, wear flashy pool table hats with numbers, and mightn't exceed five feet tall. There mouths are not visible but they have a terrifying look of intimidation and status. The poor thirteen year-old nerds can't bring themselves to challenge the authority of those damn green goblins.

"GhHMM" Jack-in-the-box holds a green microphone on the stage and rudely clears his throat to alert the attention of the students. Everyone looks up, though the staff rolls their eyes. Everyone knows he's a fucking asshole. Even ones unfamiliar with American culture are aware that that guy's an asshole. "Hello students. I am your student-scouter, Doc Scratch. Just so you American students know don't ask later I'll go ahead and say it- No you can't call me Doc, you can't call me lightbulb, you can't call me jack-in-the-box, and to a certain non-american may I say it it absolutely unacceptable to refer to me as 'Mr. Vanilla Milkshake.' It is unacceptable to call me anything but Mr. Scratch. That goes for staff too." Doc seems to looks among the crowd, challenging everyone. It is not a question that he is glaring under that massive head. Even though his eyes aren't visible his intimidation very much is. He speaks in a english maybe south african accent with a malicious yet proper undertone. Its reminds Dave of lame villains in disney movies. Scar from the Lion King describes it best. Dave couldn't be any more right. Dave bets that asshole has knocked someone off a cliff. Or got someone to do that to someone else. Probably the latter. Definitely the latter.

"Today you are beginning education here at America's most prestigious and diverse Academy. All of you here can at least understand Primary-School-Level English, and have passed an entry test. Here we will not try to Americanize you, you can still have your cultures. However, we here are set at giving you the American education experience and preparing you for the most successful future." Mr. Vanilla Milkshake spoke the sentences in the most apathetic monotonous voice he could manage. He moves his head sassily like a bobblehead. Asshole. John bets he's dramatically rolling his eyes under that bulb. He is strangely expressive. "So, anyways down to business. We have several policies to cover. 1. Echeladder, 2. Boonbucks & Grist, 3. Culture Policy, 4. Lands, 5. Aspects, 6. Expulsion, and last but not least God Tier." The word God Tier raises almost every students' attention. Mr. Watts-it-to-ya (get it? like what's it to ya but he looks like a lightbulb?) groans at their excitement. He is usually less of an asshole for first impressions, but his boss has been riding his ass lately. Not literally. Maybe. But anyways, "The Echeladder is our perk system at the school. You get higher on the echeladder for your academic and social achievements." TIght-ass-Whitey (get it? like tighty whiteys?) then spoke in falsetto flailing his arms around "oh boy, doc! how do you know our social achievements?" He then deepens his voice satanically "I AM Watching. I AM always watching. I SEE ALL." as he says this green and black lightning effect flashed up behind him on a green presentation board no one had noticed because it was green like everything else. His gloved hand loosens the grip on his previously clenched-fist-held microphone when a metallic crack echoed through the auditoriums speaker. He broke the microphone wit his little moment. Scratch then waved his hand, stopping the affect and cleared his throat. "Ahum, anyways. Echeladder has random names sometimes depending on the student that the staff comes up with but that doesn't really matter each level comes with an award. Usually a hat. Hats are cool, right? Actually we don't really care if you think they're cool. You will get a hat."

"One of the awards you can get is boonbucks. They are our currency here. You have to use them to eat. Student are automatically given 20 a day. You lose or gain more based on your actions. We also have Grist which is another more useful award. Most look similar to the American treat 'gushers' made by our lord and saviour Betty Crocker. The ones you get rewarded depend on the person yet again. You can trade with others but it is frowned upon. These can be used in the alchemiter in exchange for personalized goods. The alchemiter is location is described on your map. You have to find it yourself. They are also rewarded for social and academic success, especially in defeating your 'imps', which is what we call 'challenges' here." He never explained the alchemiter though. How are the kids supposed to know what it looks like or what it does? The thing is he doesn't even care. He is such an asshole. Sayin' vague ass shit. Chill.

"Our culture policy is simple: Don't force your culture onto people without their consent, and you don't need to share your culture at all if you don't want to. You can stay within your own. Even though we have 100% integrated classes. We have cultureless rooms with exception to beds to not offend."

"Your dorm rooms here are called 'Lands.' They are individualised with two themes. The walls and paintings and furniture are all based off of the themes. Some don't make sense at all. But, hey. I didn't make the rules." He snapped his head in a seemingly random direction to "glare". Its not seemingly if you're me however, I know that he was in fact shooting a look at his boss through a not-well-hidden camera. "Lands are located in those large dorm houses over by the west border. The green one houses the Americans, the purple one houses the Trölls, so on, so forth. Each box in the dorm house has an individual room which is led up to by stairs. And ramps for one. They seem invisible at first but are tangible if you find them, I swear. The name of your dorm assigned to your culture and your land is written on your invitation under 'DO NOT OPEN UNLESS INSTRUCTED PART I.' You will open those after I leave. We don't need any unnecessary noise when I'm speaking." Doc Scratchpost sighs deeply. This is always his least favorite part to explain. Kids get all types of hype when they learn they are sorted into something that is based off their personality. Harry Potter houses ruined a generation of children.

"Next is aspects. They are based on the survey you completed during the admissions test." He says the next paragraphs as fast as he can. It is required for him to inform them along with the DO NOT OPEN UNLESS INSTRUCTED PART II brochure. Why can't they just read the brochure? "First is your title/class. People of a certain title are expected to behave a certain way to grow into their role and has special 'abilities.' For example, Thief will steal things to their own benefit, the passive Rogue will enhance their teammates, or their session with the stolen aspect or a thief is 'one who steals (aspect) from others', a rogue is 'one who steals from (aspect)'.The Prince, as the active, is literally simplified to 'destroyer of [aspect]' or 'one who destroys via [aspect]'. Bards are somewhat stranger, in that they 'allow destruction of [aspect]' or 'invite destruction through [aspect]'. The Bard is also quite the wildcard; unpredictable by nature and thus equally likely to help or hinder his party, often to great effect. Seers will keep their party from making grave mistakes, as if they had a strategy guide for Sburb imprinted deep in their understand their aspect comprehensively. Sylphs heals people's 'wounds'. Don't think that much into it. AND DON'T OPEN YOUR THING NOW YOU WERE NOT INSTRUCTED." A certain dirty-gray-rag-wearing black skinned kid froze from breaking the section's seal. How wayward of that vagabond. Punk as fuck.

"Aspects are more confusing. Great. One Time and one Space student are necessary poor dormhouse. Time students are allowed to undo their actions. Of course since this is the real world it can't be really undone, but we are supposed to just go along with it. They can redo an assignment they do badly with no consequences, they can walk out of a room and 'take back' a rude comment they said on accident. NO BULLYING IS TOLERATEd." "Space students are allowed to manipulate the school environment. They are responsible for breeding their dormhouse's mascot 'genesis' frog. The one with the best frog gets to decide what the newest dormhouse will look like next year.

They also are expected to have the best mastery over creation, either craft-wise or through the alchemiter." "Voids are allowed in places others are not and are good at finding them, Lights show to have better luck, Minds are better with decision making and logic based outcomes, Hearts are good with intuition, emotion and all that mushy-soul stuff, yada-yada, Rage, Hope and hope are difficult to explain, Doom are likely to sense pending expulsion, Lifes can 'resurrect' someone who was officially expelled, but only once."

"Expulsion is an interesting concept here. If you are expelled you go to the 'Dream Bubble' which was an idea established by a second year student. It is a little tough to not get expelled here as we dare people to get to their highest self by risking expulsion. Almost everyone here has been expelled at least once. You can be expelled twice without being sent to the Dream Bubble. When expelled once you have back up which we call your 'Derse' or 'Prospit' dreamer. Which you are was determined by the survey, and doesn't really matter. You'd just need to spend one class period in 'Derse' or 'Prospit' and wear the respective clothes while doing it. They are hideous." He makes a small sound similar to a deep evil chuckle. "That was not introduced by the same student. Staff members feel like its adequate punishment. Its been around since the school started. The Dream Bubbles are a place that the completely expelled students learn instead of being shipped back to their country. Americans are eligible too, just to be fair. It is built in a formerly broken-down building with mixed architecture that the staff messed up on. Derse or Prospit have to be crossed to go to the Dream Bubbles. Derse and Prospit are the only places students are allowed after curfew, when everyone is supposed to be asleep. Students are only allowed to visit their own after hours though. You can meet all kinds of students in the Dream Bubbles." The students seem uneasy about the fact that expulsion was such a loose concept. Was whoever decided expulsion rules out to expel everyone? Who was in charge? Why did he want this? Does he even know what expulsion means at this point? Whoever he is he must be a crazy-ass motherfucker. Semi-sociopathic to abuse such a power. Homies gettin expelled for tying their shoelace wrong. Playin' with student's and people observing's emotions. Feels, if you will.

"And last but not least, God Tier. God Tier is a way to be free of expulsion. You first have to be expelled though. But, you need to be expelled in a certain spot. In your room. How do you get expelled in your own room, you ask? I wont tell you. If you knew how you can get expelled it would take all the fun out of it."

"Oh, but actually your'e not free of expulsion. You can get truly expelled if you get expelled for heroism or if you 'deserve' expulsion." The Milk Dud made a slight chuckle. "However, you do receive dapper clothing for reaching God Tier. Sometimes you also get stronger 'abilities'. That's a plus."